I mean I literally didn't understand what you were saying.
Now that I do it's even worse, geez dude
Why isn't asexuality included in pride?
- Thread starter Hermii
- Start date
I mean I literally didn't understand what you were saying.
Now that I do it's even worse, geez dude
finowns
Member
When did I say the above? You're dumb.
purseowner
Member
Oh yeah, and me and other people in this thread exist so you better start believing.
The Technomancer
card-carrying scientician
My best friend is ace and this is a real sore point for her. She can tell you all about the various ways that society pressures and even discriminates against her. Not in a way that will send her to jail, but in a way that very tangibly results in her feeling marginalized
This is stupid. Educate yourself please.
finowns
Member
There is a use for me why is it a problem for you?
Poor GRIMES
Banned
So imagine you live in an insulated all-White community. Do other people not exist anymore just because you're aware of them through the internet?
...you pretty clearly implied that because there isn't someone famous enough isn't talking about asexuality makes it not exist (or makes it not important), bro.
What pray-tell is it?
EdibleKnife
Member
Why does there need to be a prominent asexual? What negative impact would the existence of people who are genuinely asexual have on your life that you're so against believing the people on here who are telling you it's not just a "chemical problem"?
Also, you don't want a prominent asexual. Just a hot one. Because hot people can't be asexual. Okay.
purseowner
Member
If I were to make an Asexuality Community Thread on GAF, how many of you would be interested?
Poor GRIMES
Banned
The point people are missing is that there are statistically not that many ace people to begin with, meaning that the macro aggressions you see in other more visible groups don't apply to them. The same thing can be said about Asian-Americans in the United States; there simply aren't enough of them to see the full extent of macro aggressions towards that particular group. But, you can still see the various micro aggressions that visible groups have to go through in their daily lives manifesting in the lives of ace people. Therefore, you should not discredit them because of their lack of visibility.
How About No
Member
Wanna say thanks this is pretty interesting and I feel I understand a lil bit better now
Search first; I think there is one already
I'd totally like that shit, hell yeah
purseowner
Member
Started work on one earlier in response to this trainwreck of a thread - will try and have it up within the next day or so.
Edit: We already have one? Thought there was just the LGBT+ one.
There already kind of was one, but it didn't get much traffic.
Edit: http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=1180439
purseowner
Member
We can always try again
If anyone has any resources they want included in the OP besides AVEN and the obvious, feel free to PM me.
Conkersbadfurday
Member
I guess I'll weigh in on this as someone who uses the asexual label, though it's hard to tell how well it fits. Like a few people have said, it's a strange orientation because it can apply to a spectrum of characteristics.
Personally, I have a sex drive and things that turn me on. I have no real interest in sex though. The human body can be aesthetically pleasing, but it can also be pretty gross. It doesn't help that I'm not a big fan of touching (cuddling, holding hands, etc). I've kissed people, but it's never something I've really enjoyed.
I'm very aromantic.
That i have a sex drive and specific things that turn me on is why I question it all, but oh well.
So to the thread! Would I go to Pride? Probably not. I kinda feel like I don't belong, like I'd be taking pride in having a lack of something. It just doesn't seem like that's what the event is about. There's nothing inherently OPEN or LOUD about not wanting to have sex, and I feel like that's the point of Pride, of being OPEN and happy and loud about who you are.
Personally, I have a sex drive and things that turn me on. I have no real interest in sex though. The human body can be aesthetically pleasing, but it can also be pretty gross. It doesn't help that I'm not a big fan of touching (cuddling, holding hands, etc). I've kissed people, but it's never something I've really enjoyed.
I'm very aromantic.
That i have a sex drive and specific things that turn me on is why I question it all, but oh well.
So to the thread! Would I go to Pride? Probably not. I kinda feel like I don't belong, like I'd be taking pride in having a lack of something. It just doesn't seem like that's what the event is about. There's nothing inherently OPEN or LOUD about not wanting to have sex, and I feel like that's the point of Pride, of being OPEN and happy and loud about who you are.
WaffleTaco
Wants to outlaw technological innovation.
I would post in it.
Maybe we should try bringing this thread back to life?
Go on?
It's probably best you didn't finish that.
Hmm, it might be better to start anew so that the new thread creator is active and can add things to it.
EdibleKnife
Member
You can be open and loud about asexuality because Pride is more about visibility of marginialized identities, the different spectrums of sexual orientations and sexuality. It's about seeing other people and validating your existence rather than stifling it. The nuts and bolts of you or others being asexual have little to do with actually seeing asexuality become prominent and taking pride in that identity. If you are asexual, you are worth being happy and open about it and seeing other people happy and open about it. Pansexual is part of my identity and seeing pansexual people at Pride, openly celebrating themselves and not hiding is an inspiration to not hide and be confident in my identity. It reinforces that there's nothing shameful for the pansexual people out there who think something might be wrong with them. It should be the same with asexuality.
Well... I don't know.
Obviously, nobody should be made to feel less-than because they are a certain way, particularly since nobody can be hurt by this. There's a certain standard of respect you should have for people and telling them they're "wrong in the brain" falls well behind that standard. That being said, it IS a chemical thing. So is being straight, gay, bisexual etc. Everything you are is a mix of chemical reactions and electrical impulses. There's nothing inherently wrong about that, it just is what it is. W
here asexuality is different is it's not a different form of something, it's the absence of something. It's like never being able to see a specific color: You may be perfectly happy without yellow, even think your pallete is less complicated by it, but how do you know you wouldn't be happier with yellow in your life? At least, if you are asexual by birth and not by choice.
It's probable that I'll never understand because it's impossible to put myself in their shoes, but from a purely detached, logical perspective, it's hard to reconcile.
purseowner
Member
Thank you for seeking to invalidate asexuality as an orientation and identity. It's offensive shit like this that's the reason why there isn't already a community thread.
On a positive note, let's fix that.
Ya, it's waaayyy too broad. An asexual person can enjoy sex and have a high libido/sex drive? Then what the fuck even makes someone asexual?
For years I never understood the idea that people feel compelled to have sex. Beyond wanting kids it just didnt make any sense to me. Seemed to create way more drama than its worth and obviously no one likes unplanned pregnancies. You hear people talk and you see how much of media is driven by attraction and it seems really dumb and pointless.
It took till I had an actual talk with people about sexuality that I'm experiencing things differently and theres actually a reason for all this weird stuff. So I just take peoples word for it. I decided it was super dumb to judge them because I know that I just can't relate.
🤷
I'm not trying to shit on that guy's work, but a lot of people understand the romance and sex can be mutually exclusive.
Chittagong
Gold Member
It is though
In the Helsinki pride today there was a decent sized section for it
In the Helsinki pride today there was a decent sized section for it
Poor GRIMES
Banned
Absolutely. But people straight up believe that being asexual simply means no sex drive. Like other sexualities, it exists within a spectrum.
I don't think a lack of sex drive should be part of this spectrum in isolation because that would be medical ailments can cause asexuality.
purseowner
Member
Trying to come up with the most informative yet inclusive titling for the community thread.
'Ace Spectrum' is more inclusive, but would likely confuse those not in the know.
'Asexuality' is easier to understand, but excludes aromantic folks, etc. who should be just as much part of the thread.
Thoughts?
'Ace Spectrum' is more inclusive, but would likely confuse those not in the know.
'Asexuality' is easier to understand, but excludes aromantic folks, etc. who should be just as much part of the thread.
Thoughts?
Two things...
1. Saying that any sexuality is the result of different chemicals in the body, while fundamentally right, has been historically used to say people that aren't heteronormative have an illness of some sort. While it may not be anyone's intent to use it in such manner, the fact remains that those two statements are a bit close for comfort. Additionally, it's reductive to the point that literally everything we do in life comes down to chemical reactions to the brain, and doesn't lend much to discussion at the end of the day.
2. Do you mean that other people shouldn't care about how people identify themselves because it doesn't harm those others? Or that asexuality, on a whole, doesn't hurt anyone emotionally/physically/whatever?
EDIT:
whynotboth.gif
purseowner
Member
Is the thread okay for those who are in relationships with asexual people?
I think only myself and one other Gaffer spoke about this experience. It's a little hard because coming from someone with a healthy libido there are a lot of arrangements we make as a couple that allow for a place for sex, but it seems like it's unknown territory.
oh and, as an aside, Japanese social services suck donkey balls
I like it~
Can you PM it to me when the link is up? I'll make sure to signal it in the Dating GAF thread. There's a new more asexuals (or at least people understanding of asexuals) in there than you would think.
Sorry for the off-topicness mods D:
purseowner
Member
Yep absolutely. I think we should make this an inclusive and welcoming thread for ace folk, those in relationships with them/with ace family and friends, and those who don't understand what asexuality is and are actually interested in educating themselves rather than making bigoted judgements.
I'm more to happy to talk to you about that when the OT is up and running, as I'm the asexual person in a similar relationship. Or in PMs, if you're uncomfortable with it being public.
How About No
Member
Oh may I just say that Squish is maybe the best term for anything ever
purseowner
Member
If you're genuinely curious about understanding better, check out the OT when it goes up soon.
I'm more to happy to talk to you about that when the OT is up and running, as I'm the asexual person in a similar relationship. Or in PMs, if you're uncomfortable with it being public.
I'll probably lurk whenever there's something specific to ask or such. Thanks however
A Link to the Past
Banned
A Junior Member who opened their account 11 years ago
I have a good idea that these kinds of posts are a part of why that is
Note: Not making fun of new members, just older members who lost thread-posting privileges.