Yep, another girl thread

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joelseph said:
Sit down behind her, squeeze her arm and say "excuse me, you are fucking awesome. We should grab lunch after this". Make sure you make good eye contact and you are golden.

Not sure if this was meant to be funny, but I loled! Also the best advice in this thread!!!
 
I try to avoid these threads because I tend to get too involved, but there's one piece of advice I'd feel a little guilty not dropping:

DevilWillcry said:
What type of joke would reveal that information?
Don't fucking ask her about her boyfriend. She either has a boyfriend or she doesn't. She's either interested in you or she isn't. If she's interested in you and she has a boyfriend, she might be ready to trade up, so it's ultimately not your problem. However, asking about a boyfriend conveys insecurity and gives her the upper hand - she knows your interested, and it's up to her whether to start something or not. This is bad, because women - especially beautiful women - aren't interested in a guy that's easy to get. My advice is to not bring up the subject at all, and if she brings it up, but still wants to talk to you/spend time with you, ignore it and talk about something else. Sometimes girls say they have a boyfriend when they don't to see how you'll react. If she really has a boyfriend, and she isn't interested in you, it will be obvious.

Kastro said:
I have a hard time with the "there's other fish in the sea" thing. When I become fixated on someone I have a hard time thinking of anyone else, especially if they've shown me an interest.

That's because you're desperate. I don't say this to insult you - there's nothing wrong with being lonely - I just want to put things in perspective. You mistakenly believe that you will not be successful with women and thus, when any woman shows you the slightest bit of affection, you view her as your only chance to get laid/get married/have a girlfriend/ect. This is the definition of the (misogynist) term "putting pussy on a pedestal". But you need to realize that this belief is false, and that there are many women out their that would be receptive to your advances - so long as you have the courage to approach them. You also need to understand that one does not get over the fear of rejection before one has ever been rejected - just as boxer can not learn to recover from a punch before he has entered his first fight. Go out, talk to women (plural), and if you do get rejected, remind yourself that you don't have time to feel bad because there's another girl at the other end of the bar waiting to meet you.
 
I'd go with something like this

"I was gonna ask if I could copy your notes as an icebreaker but I don't feel like writing all that crap over again so how about we just grab some coffee after class?"
 
I had the class today. I went in early because she is usually there early. When I got there, she wasn't even there. When she gets in she starts talking to this lady as soon as she walks through the door. The conversation goes on and on and I'm waiting for a a moment of silence in the conversation to jump in, but they don't stop, they just keep on talking without even taking a breath. I didn't want to interrupt one of them in mid sentence because that would be pretty rude and pretty weird since I almost never talk to either of these women. So I listen to the conversation and I hear she is moving to another state next year. That's a deal breaker for me, so I decided to forget about it and decided not to talk to her. It was quite anticlimactic. Ironically, she sat at the next table over from me in the lounge by herself after psych class that day. I had only planned on making small talk with her anyway and since there are only about 3 sessions of class before the semester ends and she moves I figured that it wouldn't even be worth the effort. Oh well, at least I got some competent advice from GAF out of this thing. :D
 
DevilWillcry said:
I had the class today. I went in early because she is usually there early. When I got there, she wasn't even there. When she gets in she starts talking to this lady as soon as she walks through the door. The conversation goes on and on and I'm waiting for a a moment of silence in the conversation to jump in, but they don't stop, they just keep on talking without even taking a breath. I didn't want to interrupt one of them in mid sentence because that would be pretty rude and pretty weird since I almost never talk to either of these women. So I listen to the conversation and I hear she is moving to another state next year. That's a deal breaker for me, so I decided to forget about it and decided not to talk to her. It was quite anticlimactic. Ironically, she sat at the next table over from me in the lounge by herself after psych class that day. I had only planned on making small talk with her anyway and since there are only about 3 sessions of class before the semester ends and she moves I figured that it wouldn't even be worth the effort. Oh well, at least I got some competent advice from GAF out of this thing. :D

You fool! You could have had freaky leaving-the-state-so-it-doesn't-count sex.
 
DevilWillcry said:
I'd like to approach her and talk to her but there are a few problems that I feel are preventing that:

1- First of all, I don't know where to approach her. ?

2- Secondly, I don't even know if this girl has a boyfriend.

3- Finally, I don't think she knows I exist.


Basics my friend. Let me explain the role of the man.

1- The where isn't preventing much. Take her on anywhere she's not completely busy. Even busy it could work out anyways.

2- This is 100% not related with approaching her. Boyfriends and girlfriends come and goes. Most of the time, the new boyfriend push the last one out. The "boyfriend or not" isn't supposed to prevent you from approaching her AT ALL.

3- You don't exist when you're not making yourself exist for her. Her again it's not really a worry and you have to start by approaching her.

All in all, you have more subtle, deeper problem. Maybe lack of confidence or you're shy for X reason. You post there demonstrate that you voluntarily put yourself barriers. Barriers that don't really exist.
 
Ranger X said:
All in all, you have more subtle, deeper problem. Maybe lack of confidence or you're shy for X reason. You post there demonstrate that you voluntarily put yourself barriers. Barriers that don't really exist.
Yeah, I'm starting to really notice this problem. I've always been a little shy, I guess I just figured I would get over it. I'm 19 years old now and I'm noticing that it's not normal to have this problem at this age. Is there anything I can do about it?
 
DevilWillcry said:
Yeah, I'm starting to really notice this problem. I've always been a little shy, I guess I just figured I would get over it. I'm 19 years old now and I'm noticing that it's not normal to have this problem at this age. Is there anything I can do about it?

Don't fixate on it or you'll really set it in stone. Just realise rejection isn't the end of the world, feels shitty for a bit you'll always find your feet.
 
DevilWillcry said:
Yeah, I'm starting to really notice this problem. I've always been a little shy, I guess I just figured I would get over it. I'm 19 years old now and I'm noticing that it's not normal to have this problem at this age. Is there anything I can do about it?

You can start by changing this behavior:

DevilWillcry said:
Ironically, she sat at the next table over from me in the lounge by herself after psych class that day. I had only planned on making small talk with her anyway and since there are only about 3 sessions of class before the semester ends and she moves I figured that it wouldn't even be worth the effort.

This was a golden opportunity that you missed. If she hangs out alone after another session, sieze the moment and try talking to her.

Oh well, at least I got some competent advice from GAF out of this thing. :D

You got advice, but didn't put it to use. :p The best thing you can do is force yourself to talk to her before your semester is over.
 
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