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[genjiZERO]

A You can't have one without the other. It's just not possible. There's no real way to prove this to as you seem to not want to understand the concept of dualism.

Way to sleaze over my post. I've been saying in this thread that there are negative aspects to all descriptors. It's not possible all are all inclusive and positive 100%. The exotic negatives are small. The positives are more neutral-good because it's interchangeable.

B It is also perfectly reasonable for someone in White Horse to find Eygptians exotic. How you don't see how exotic is relative is beyond me.

A If beauty is dualistic, then disprove my statement:

There are 5 paintings in the world. These are the only 5 paintings that have ever existed. All 5 of them are beautiful.

Or this rhetorical:

Do you love your mother? Did you need to hate something else to know you loved her?

B But it's just not true. You seem to believe that all these terms have dualistic properties, but that's just utterly false. If you think it's not then prove it to me. You haven't done that.

Because that ethnic Egyptian just might be a Canadian citizen. And when your bumpkin from White Horse calls that person "exotic" he is implying that he himself is the real Canadian, not the other.

But you know. Keep going with it. Some people don't mind, but others will think you're a bigot. Like it or not it's the cold truth.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

A If beauty is dualistic, then disprove my statement:

There are 5 paintings in the world. These are the only 5 paintings that have ever existed. All 5 of them are beautiful.

Or this rhetorical:

Do you love your mother? Did you need to hate something else to know you loved her?

B But it's just not true. You seem to believe that all these terms have dualistic properties, but that's just utterly false. If you think it's not then prove it to me. You haven't done that.

C Because that ethnic Egyptian just might be a Canadian citizen. And your bumpkin from White Horse calls that person "exotic" he is implying that he himself is the real Canadian, not the other.

But you know. Keep going with it. Some people don't mind, but other will think you're a bigot. Like it or not it's the cold truth.

Genji, you are terrific. I like all of your analogy here. Specially the last one.

much love, mate.

 

[GorillaJu]

To me, "exotic" is like a way of saying "unique" but without ambiguity. If you're offended by it, well...

 

[BurnOutBrighter]

"Exotic" is a statement, not a compliment.

 

[genjiZERO]

Genji, you are terrific. I like all of your analogy here. Specially the last one.

much love, mate.

Phew, glad I'm getting through! I can fall asleep watching old episodes of Doctor Who in peace now.

respect.

 

[Doc Holliday]

Shame too, because I find the actual word "exotic" absolutely beautiful. It's just an awesome sounding word.

 

[royalan]

Shame too, because I find the actual word "exotic" absolutely beautiful. It's just an awesome sounding word.

You can still use the word, you know.

Just don't attempt to use it as a compliment to another person.

 

[Valhelm]

Shame too, because I find the actual word "exotic" absolutely beautiful. It's just an awesome sounding word.

I think it's a fine word to use when you're not describing another person.

 

[GorillaJu]

It's probably better used in the third person, but not so good in the second. "She has such an exotic beauty" sounds more like admiration, but "Wow you're so exotic!" is patronizing.

I feel like it's one of those things where people would do well not to internalize potentially hurtful compliments and instead recognize where the speaker is coming from. If someone thinks a dark skinned person is "exotic" then that says more about their world view than it does the person on the receiving end.

 

[Sketchbag]

A If beauty is dualistic, then disprove my statement:

There are 5 paintings in the world. These are the only 5 paintings that have ever existed. All 5 of them are beautiful.

Or this rhetorical:

Do you love your mother? Did you need to hate something else to know you loved her?

B But it's just not true. You seem to believe that all these terms have dualistic properties, but that's just utterly false. If you think it's not then prove it to me. You haven't done that.

Because that ethnic Egyptian just might be a Canadian citizen. And when your bumpkin from White Horse calls that person "exotic" he is implying that he himself is the real Canadian, not the other.

But you know. Keep going with it. Some people don't mind, but others will think you're a bigot. Like it or not it's the cold truth.

I know they're beautiful because I understand there are things outside of paintings that are not beautiful. I can tell if they're beautiful if, to me, they don't fit in the the not-beautiful category. This is basic logic. Yes. I would need to understand the concept of hate to know what I love. This, again, is basic logic.

I already said if they're from Canada then they're not a foreigner. They can have exotic features though. Which is a branch off of being exotic.

You're now saying people who consider people exotic to themselves as bigots and excluding others. You have no proof of this and are injecting other qualities into the mix.

I am now a bigot? This escalated quickly.

 

[Valhelm]

I really hope this isn't construed as pot-stirring, but is "exotic" only really used by white people?

My girlfriend is mixed and gets asked "What are you?" by Black people a lot, and her relatives make fun of her for "looking Indian", but she's never mentioned being called exotic.

 

[Winterfang]

Shame too, because I find the actual word "exotic" absolutely beautiful. It's just an awesome sounding word.

It is, some people actually like it. (I don't mind being on the receiving end of that compliment <3)

Edit: @Valhelm

No, I have use it and being in the receiving end. I'm a half white/Half Black, dark skinned, all latino. If what you mean is "Is the word exotic racist when white people use it, to describe a person of another ethnicity'' I'll say no as well, but what I gathered for the video is that it doesn't matter if you are saying it as a nice compliment, some people just don't like it, because they see another implication behind it.

 

[genjiZERO]

I know they're beautiful because I understand there are things outside of paintings that are not beautiful. I can tell if they're beautiful if, to me, they don't fit in the the not-beautiful category. This is basic logic. Yes. I would need to understand the concept of hate to know what I love. This, again, is basic logic.

I already said if they're from Canada then they're not a foreigner. They can have exotic features though. Which is a branch off of being exotic.

You're now saying people who consider people exotic to themselves as bigots and excluding others. You have no proof of this and are injecting other qualities into the mix.

I am now a bigot? This escalated quickly.

Man, you only love your mom because you hate something else? I feel bad for you kid.

 

[TAJ]

It's not a word I use mostly because it's fallen out of use.
That said, have you ever looked at someone and thought that they were good-looking in a generic sort of way? To me, exotic is the opposite of that in terms of attractive people.
Straight compliment. But I tend to interpret comments about myself in the worst possible way so I can see where people who don't like it are coming from. For example I've had a few people say that my eyes remind them of a wolf's and I think "Yeah, fuck you too." but some people think that's a somehow a compliment?

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

I really hope this isn't construed as pot-stirring, but is "exotic" only really used by white people?

My girlfriend is mixed and gets asked "What are you?" by Black people a lot, and her relatives make fun of her for "looking Indian", but she's never mentioned being called exotic.

Yeah, Im like Fiction. I've only been called Exotic by white people. Odd, that.

And yes, it's usually followed by "What are you?"

 

[Sketchbag]

Man, you only love your mom because you hate something else? I feel bad for you kid.

You are now twisting the concept: I am not saying you have to love in order to hate and vice versa, you have to understand that love cannot exist without hate--you must understand that hate exists.

The person doesn't have to say, "you're ugly" to people to find people beautiful, but for their to be beautiful people in the world there are going to be ugly people (you may not tell them they are) but it is a natural byproduct of it existing for there cannot be only beautiful people as there needs to be a scale or a grading system on that beauty. That grading scale can cause a divide which it already does in the real world with eating disorders.

Are you understanding now?

 

[Sketchbag]

I've only been told that by white people, but that's just my experience. It's often followed up with the 'what are you?' question, though never those exact words (usually in a 'where you from? what ethnicity are you? etc'

I've been called exotic in Thailand. I thought to myself, "Um, this is a tourist bar in Bangkok, I see lots of white people in here."

 

[Doc Holliday]

I've only been told that by white people, but that's just my experience. It's often followed up with the 'what are you?' question, though never those exact words (usually in a 'where you from? what ethnicity are you? etc'

My wife uses exotic all the time, and she's latina. I've been called exotic looking by whites, Asians, latins and black people. I really don't think it's a racist component to using it. It just something you don't see everyday. Like rain on a sunny day, double rainbow, 4 leaf clovers, Red poodles etc etc. Never had anyone use in a negative way to my knowledge, always in a positive manner. If someone would find offense to that word I would apologize and move on knowing that that person is probably way too sensitive to hang out with

 

[royalan]

My wife uses exotic all the time, and she's latina. I've been called exotic looking by whites, Asians, latins and black people. I really don't think it's a racist component to using it. It just something you don't see everyday. Like rain on a sunny day, double rainbow, 4 leaf clovers, Red poodles etc etc. Never had anyone use in a negative way to my knowledge, always in a positive manner. If someone would find offense to that word I would apologize and move on knowing that that person is probably way too sensitive to hang out with

There doesn't need to be a bad intent for their to be a racial component that might make someone uncomfortable.

I went on a date once with a guy who wouldn't stop talking about my skin tone and how attractive he thought it was. Of course he meant well. Of course he thought he was flattering me. In reality it made me incredibly uncomfortable and completely objectified. I felt like I could have been talking about my favorite video game, my job, or Hitler at that table and it wouldn't have mattered.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

I've been called exotic in Thailand. I thought to myself, "Um, this is a tourist bar in Bangkok, I see lots of white people in here."

By who? (Curious)

If it's by a local, their grasp of English might be a bit different than a native speaker's.

(first person experience of complimenting white people on their protruding nose) (it didn't go well) (person hated his nose) (but back where i'm from, a protruding nose is considered a desirable trait)

 

[Sketchbag]

There doesn't need to be a bad intent for their to be a racial component that might make someone uncomfortable.

I went on a date once with a guy who wouldn't stop talking about my skin tone and how attractive he thought it was. Of course he meant well. Of course he thought he was flattering me. In reality it made me incredibly uncomfortable and completely objectified. I felt like I could have been talking about my favorite video game, my job, or Hitler at that table and it wouldn't have mattered.

You have to show there is a negative racial component to exotic or skin tone. Not all racial remarks are negative. That would mean accents are bad.

It seems he was actually in it to sleep with you (by your wording), so it may have been more of a communication problem.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

It's more like, "you don't look like me, I want to tell you how you don't look like me!" ...uh, great, thanks. "You're pretty/cute" would work without the oblivious tactlessness of an often racially-charged sentiment.



^- Exactly.

It's usually not bigoted, but it's definitely almost a slap in the face reminder that no matter how Americans/whatever I think of myself as, others will see me as just an "Asian."




^- Yeah. "Where are you really from?"

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

*glomps*

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

You have to show there is a negative racial component to exotic or skin tone. Not all racial remarks are negative. That would mean accents are bad.

It seems he was actually in it to sleep with you (by your wording), so it may have been more of a communication problem.

What the fuck? Are you aware that we're human beings?

 

[Sketchbag]

By who? (Curious)

If it's by a local, their grasp of English might be a bit different than a native speaker's.

(first person experience of complimenting white people on their protruding nose) (it didn't go well) (person hated his nose) (but back where i'm from, a protruding nose is considered a desirable trait)

Girl named Rachel (she chose an English name based off friends... which seems really common somehow). She seemed cool. Nope, but I was exotic. I was from Canada. I was the Canadian. In truth I am Canadian so...

 

[royalan]

You have to show there is a negative racial component to exotic or skin tone. Not all racial remarks are negative. That would mean accents are bad.

It seems he was actually in it to sleep with you (by your wording), so it may have been more of a communication problem.

Why do you think it has to be negative in order to make someone feel uncomfortable or be an inappropriate thing to harp on?

A "duh" at the bolded. lol

 

[Sketchbag]

What the fuck? Are you aware that we're human beings?

We are human beings. You're saying it couldn't be a communication error? 2 people on a first date (seems that way since it was a bad experience, who would write this and go on another or what?) and one is trying to connect physically... could it be someone is trying to get laid and, well, there's a communication error going on?

Why do you think it has to be negative in order to make someone feel uncomfortable or be an inappropriate thing to harp on?

It has to be negative or else it's an over reaction.

It's not inappropriate, I would say it's a dumb thing to harp on about. People have only said anecdotally that they can or possibly find it offensive. We can all present arguments on why all descriptive words can be negative but we don't because we move on and find it to be a dumb thing to worry about.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

Girl named Rachel (she chose an English name based off friends... which seems really common somehow). She seemed cool. Nope, but I was exotic. I was from Canada. I was the Canadian. In truth I am Canadian so...

Wait, wait

Is English Rachel's first tongue? Cuz yeah, there might be a potential different grasp of languages that doesn't really translate across cultures.





Also, now that I've thought hard about it.... Exotic things to be are mostly animals and food and architecture. I dont really attach it to people, somehow. I mean, just thinking back and assessing my own chosen vocabulary. Exotic also, in my brain, is a bit too close with Erotic.

:3

 

[Sketchbag]

Wait, wait

Is English Rachel's first tongue? Cuz yeah, there might be a potential different grasp of languages that doesn't really translate across cultures.

No. Siamse is. Rachel is her English name meaning she uses it when she travels as her real name is more difficult to share and have people say. Lots of Asians do this. I used to work with a lot of Koreans and a lot of the men were Ross. No Chandlers though.

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

We are human beings. You're saying it couldn't be a communication error? 2 people on a first date (seems that way since it was a bad experience, who would write this and go on another or what?) and one is trying to connect physically... could it be someone is trying to get laid and, well, there's a communication error going on?

I see what you're saying now. I read it like "but all that skin talk meant he wanted to sleep with you" as in he should feel better because of that, ignoring his feelings on the creepiness. I get it now, though.

 

[genjiZERO]

You are now twisting the concept: I am not saying you have to love in order to hate and vice versa, you have to understand that love cannot exist without hate--you must understand that hate exists.

The person doesn't have to say, "you're ugly" to people to find people beautiful, but for their to be beautiful people in the world there are going to be ugly people (you may not tell them they are) but it is a natural byproduct of it existing for there cannot be only beautiful people as there needs to be a scale or a grading system on that beauty. That grading scale can cause a divide which it already does in the real world with eating disorders.

Are you understanding now?

Damn, so when you were a little kid and your mom took you to McDonald's to get a happy meal, that love you felt, was only because you understood hatred?

That's pretty exotic if I dare say so!

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

No. Siamse is. Rachel is her English name meaning she uses it when she travels as her real name is more difficult to share and have people say. Lots of Asians do this. I used to work with a lot of Koreans and a lot of the men were Ross. No Chandlers though.

Ya, I know. I am Asian and has an English name, cuz English people finds it easier to pronounce.

:x

Just saying that as someone who comes from her background, our use of some words are a bit grasping at times. English is not my first language. Took me years to get comfortable with it.

I mean, she might not mean "Exotic" as you mean "Exotic"

But you'd know better being there and having her as an actual friend, so I will defer to your take on this.

An Adventure of a Canadian in Siam!

 

[Sketchbag]

Damn, so when you were a little kid and your mom took you to McDonald's to get a happy meal, that love you felt, was only because you understood hatred?

That's pretty exotic if I dare say so!

Please do not post if you're not going to respond to the argument.

And yes.

 

[genjiZERO]

Please do not post if you're not going to respond to the argument.

And yes.

Oh Sketchbag, I appreciate you selling out your love for your mom to try to win an internet argument.

 

[Sketchbag]

Oh Sketchbag, I appreciate you selling out your love for your mom to try to win an internet argument.

Not what I did but oh well. I guess if you don't have an actual response targeting me is probably the next best thing... right?

 

[FindMyFarms]

Im half filipino half saudi arabian. I have yet to meet or even hear of another person with that mix. People describe me as exotic all the time. I have never ever found that to be anything other than comolimentary. Im not trying to toot my own horn, I just think the notion presented by the OP is ridiculous.

 

[Transhuman]

^-. It may not be inherently negative, but it can still be considered a micro-aggression.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microaggression

“brief and commonplace daily verbal, behavioral, or environmental indignities, whether intentional or unintentional, that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative racial slights and insults toward people.”

I want to agree, but I really don't think it fits the bolded. It's not hostile or implicative that you think less of the other person. I've only ever seen the word to mean "extravagant, unique, alluring" e.t.c. ("an exotic meal", "an exotic painting"). I can see how it'd be annoying to hear people to describe you as exotic over and over again, but you could say that about any overused compliment or observation that people have on first meeting.

Im half filipino half saudi arabian. I have yet to meet or even hear of another person with that mix. People describe me as exotic all the time. I have never ever found that to be anything other than comolimentary. Im not trying to toot my own horn, I just think the notion presented by the OP is ridiculous.

Right? When I see comments like this:

If someone in Britain calls me exotic I would be offended as I was born and raised in Britain, plus I don't like being reminded of my Pakistani roots.

I can't help but see it as self-loathing.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

Idk, Transhuman, I think maybe there's possibility that being reminded of where you are from is heavily associated with bad memories of that place. Maybe something really traumatic happened there that was caused by that place's cultural system or something.

A friend of mine came to Australia from Vietnam and he dislikes being associated with his roots. He just calls himself Australian and he integrates fully into the Australian lifestyle. Once we were close enough I asked him why. And he said because Vietnam murdered his parents. I refrained from asking further, then, because clearly the thought of his home country and his origins were very upsetting.

I rather not make assumptions.

 

[FindMyFarms]

Also girls LOVE callin themselves exotic.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

Also girls LOVE callin themselves exotic.

NO

 

[GorillaJu]

Yeah, Im like Fiction. I've only been called Exotic by white people. Odd, that.

And yes, it's usually followed by "What are you?"

It's not really odd I don't think. If you're a racial minority in a majority white country, it's always going to be the majority that thinks of you as "exotic".

If I went to India and saw another white person, I wouldn't expect them to call me exotic.

 

[suzu]

Also girls LOVE callin themselves exotic.

Uh no.

There doesn't need to be a bad intent for their to be a racial component that might make someone uncomfortable.

Agreed.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

It's not really odd I don't think. If you're a racial minority in a majority white country, it's always going to be the majority that thinks of you as "exotic".

If I went to India and saw another white person, I wouldn't expect them to call me exotic.

Oh but I've been conversing with Sketchbag and he argues that other white ethnicities are also Exotic to him (as a white person). His examples were 'Irish accents' is exotic to him as a Canadian person.

 

[GorillaJu]

Oh but I've been conversing with Sketchbag and he argues that other white ethnicities are also Exotic to him (as a white person). His examples were 'Irish accents' is exotic to him as a Canadian person.

I didn't see that argument, but what word would you use to describe the attraction you have to foreign accents of English? Maybe not you specifically, but for anyone who finds accents attractive.

 

[Valhelm]

Im half filipino half saudi arabian. I have yet to meet or even hear of another person with that mix. People describe me as exotic all the time. I have never ever found that to be anything other than comolimentary. Im not trying to toot my own horn, I just think the notion presented by the OP is ridiculous.

It's awesome that you feel that way, but not everybody does. Enough people find the word "exotic" offensive that it's not a good compliment for somebody you don't know well.

 

[jasonng]

Im half filipino half saudi arabian. I have yet to meet or even hear of another person with that mix. People describe me as exotic all the time. I have never ever found that to be anything other than comolimentary. Im not trying to toot my own horn, I just think the notion presented by the OP is ridiculous.

Now imagine if you're surrounded by a community full of people with your mix and you are still being called exotic. Would you feel the same way?

 

[Transhuman]

But to some of us (nonwhites), it is. It's basically a "you look like you don't belong."

But there's a pretty big difference between mentioning/ complimenting someone with a "I like the way you look, it's very exotic" and this..

&#8220;Where are you from?&#8221;

&#8220;I&#8217;m from the United States&#8221;

&#8220;Are you from China?&#8221;

&#8220;No I&#8217;m from the United States&#8221;

&#8220;oh but you look like you are from China. Are you from Korea?&#8221;

&#8220;No. the United States&#8221;

&#8220;Oh but you have such small eyes&#8221;

On one hand, the person who is asking is being a prick for hammering on a question that the other person clearly doesn't want to answer. On the other hand, it's incredibly obvious that what the person asking wants to know is what race the other person is. The correct way to ask this is "Do you mind if I ask: what race are you?" or "Do you you mind if I ask: are you <race here>". I don't think it's inherently racist or taboo or rude to want to know someone's background.

Idk, Transhuman, I think maybe there's possibility that being reminded of where you are from is heavily associated with bad memories of that place. Maybe something really traumatic happened there that was caused by that place's cultural system or something.

A friend of mine came to Australia from Vietnam and he dislikes being associated with his roots. He just calls himself Australian and he integrates fully into the Australian lifestyle. Once we were close enough I asked him why. And he said because Vietnam murdered his parents. I refrained from asking further, then, because clearly the thought of his home country and his origins were very upsetting.

I rather not make assumptions.

There's nothing wrong with ingratiating yourself with a different culture, but trying to distance yourself from your genetics (as opposed to the landmass those genetics represent) just reeks to me of self-hatred. I don't know him but if he baulks at being called a Vietnamese Australian I feel sorry for him.

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

I didn't see that argument, but what word would you use to describe the attraction you have to foreign accents of English? Maybe not you specifically, but for anyone who finds accents attractive.

.... um,... i dont know what word i'd use. i dont have that attraction. i understand the attraction but i dont feel it strongly, i mean. like, proper Britisth accents are appealing to me because of its connotation of primness, as in, in my head, this is how English is supposed to be spoken. but that's not probably not really related to exoticness...

:x

i have attraction to heavy/ husky voiced persons though :> wherever they're from :>

 

[YesNOnoNOYes]

There's nothing wrong with ingratiating yourself with a different culture, but trying to distance yourself from your genetics (as opposed to the landmass those genetics represent) just reeks to me of self-hatred. I don't know him but if he baulks at being called a Vietnamese Australian I feel sorry for him.

He calls himself Australian only. I donno if that's sad or not... I think what happened to his family might have been a bit sadder.

He doesnt deny that he's Asian by genes, though. He just despises his home country, not his Asianness.

 

[Wazzy]

I didn't see that argument, but what word would you use to describe the attraction you have to foreign accents of English? Maybe not you specifically, but for anyone who finds accents attractive.

Compliment their accent instead?

I don't see why it's a big deal to just not use the word exotic. If a girl or guy wants to refer to themselves that way, that's their decision. It doesn't mean people should get to call whoever they want exotic.

 

[Transhuman]

He calls himself Australian only. I donno if that's sad or not... I think what happened to his family might have been a bit sadder.

He doesnt deny that he's Asian by genes, though. He just despises his home country, not his Asianness.

Then I can understand if he doesn't like being simply called "a Vietnamese person" since they could be implying his nationality is Vietnamese, but just from your description of him it doesn't sound like he'd be offended if someone said "I find you pretty hot, I've always been drawn to exotic looking guys"- or something similar.