GAF, I've made a huge mistake. (Job related.)

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I'm losing any pity for you, your mom hooked you up and now her reputation is tarnished...Good Job :p

It could be worse. My mom got me an interview at her job like 10 years ago, and it was pretty much a lock. And then I failed the drug test...she was beyond humiliated.
 

acevans2

Member
So many people seem to think anything remotely out of their comfort zone is unacceptable and doesn't need to be tolerated these days.

I would never blame a person for leaving a bad-fit job to pursue a dream, but you didn't even spend a full morning to find out if it was truly a bad fit, and left because you were too good for it, not because you had anything better planned.
 
Welp, here's the new case study example people will reference when talking about millennials.

OP, my last post is sort of buried at the end of the last page. It had advice. I'll add to it. Get off gaf, call your ex-boss, and blame your work ethic for your extremely poor decision. Now.

It almost bothers me more that you had to take the time to ask us if you fucked up instead of getting that job back.

This is actually great advice.
 

BumRush

Member
OP, my last post is sort of buried at the end of the last page. It had advice. I'll add to it. Get off gaf, call your ex-boss, and blame your work ethic for your extremely poor decision. Now.

It almost bothers me more that you had to take the time to ask us if you fucked up instead of getting that job back.
 
OP's lucky she got a desk. I spent a week at my current job working from a couch with my personal laptop on my lap and then migrating between several different people's desks while they were on vacation for my first month. The whole process takes some patience. And even after being there for several years and getting migrated to a different office I had to personally hook stuff up myself and get IT to install several needed programs. Inserting a new person into a work space isn't a quick scenario these days. Sorry about what happened though and I hope she can bounce back from this.
 
Don't understand al the vitriol coming from some of you guys. OP's head isn't in a good place right now and dogpiling on their situation isn't helping.

You may have fucked things up with this job, OP, but it's not as if your future is determined for you. Yeah, you have some explaining to do to your mom considering she seemingly hooked you up with this position. However, it doesn't give her the right to continually lambaste you over something you know was a terrible idea.

Continue the job search, omit this from your resume, and just move on. Remember to not jump the gun at your next job and, if you do have to wait, spend that time doing something productive. As others mentioned, introduce yourself to others around you, chat them up if they're not super busy. Just be patient; lots of people would love to get paid to do nothing.
 

Lunar15

Member
1. You didn't "fuck up your life", but you definitely made an extremely poor decision. Please learn from it so that the whole thing isn't a waste. You only "fucked up your life" if you refuse to learn from a failure.

2. This honesty sounds like a social disorder.
 

G0523

Member
How long did you look for a job and how many hours did you spend interviewing?

The interview was only a half-hour. I didn't think I got it anyway since I wasn't getting a good perception of the interviewers, they didn't show me around, and they wanted to get me out as fast as possible. So I was really surprised that I got it. But, damn, I don't think I could've handled that. I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I can't just be sitting around and bored anymore.
 

Hrothgar

Member
This can't be real.

It is normal to spend a few days (in my case a week) doing no real work besides administrative shit.
 

entremet

Member
OP, why didn't you call your mom before speaking to your supervisor?

She hooked you up. She surely would've calmed you down form these measures.
 

xxracerxx

Don't worry, I'll vouch for them.
I'm trying not to but the thought has crossed my mind, especially since my mom keeps calling me and yelling at me over the phone, telling me how stupid I am, that I fucked up my life, etc. because she "worked so hard" to get me this job.

Again, you didn't ruin your life, you just fucked up.

Also, did your mom get you the job?

I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I can't just be sitting around and bored anymore.
Hate to break it to you but a shit ton of jobs are boring.
 

GaimeGuy

Volunteer Deputy Campaign Director, Obama for America '16
Op, the real world isn't like the classroom. You don't sit down day 1, and your boss comes to you with a syllabus and material all ready to go.

What you did was stupid. That said, it's not the end of the world. Learn from this, and for your next job, ask more questions, be more patient, and understand that the world does not revolve around you.

And if need be, put your mom on ignore for a little while. It sounds like neither of you are making the other feel better at this moment. :/
 
I'm trying not to but the thought has crossed my mind, especially since my mom keeps calling me and yelling at me over the phone, telling me how stupid I am, that I fucked up my life, etc. because she "worked so hard" to get me this job.
Tell her to pull the strings again and get you back in. Then don't make the same mistake again.

Seriously, just go back into work tomorrow and apologize to your boss and say that you did not mean to act unprofessionally. That you were really looking forward to contributing and that you felt ashamed when you hadn't and acted irrationally.

Maybe they give you a second chance. You have nothing to lose other than a morning of travel and some of your pride, which you can always earn back.

If you really think the job isn't a good fit, then you didn't make a mistake. Your mistake would be taking a job that is going to make you miserable and not get you to where you want to be. But good lord man, try giving it more than a few hours to decide. Corporate America can be a little slow.
 
I'm trying not to but the thought has crossed my mind, especially since my mom keeps calling me and yelling at me over the phone, telling me how stupid I am, that I fucked up my life, etc. because she "worked so hard" to get me this job.
I'm really a bit baffled by your thought process. Please indulge me in a couple of questions:

1. Why did you jump to saying "I quit" instead of simply asking your supervisor about the training?

2. Why are you jumping to "maybe I should kill myself" instead of considering that this isn't the end of the road?

3. In general are you quick to jump to "bail out" or "well f this, i quit" decisions?

Those questions are purely curiosity questions on my end because I don't understand your thought process...

But like others have said, yes you did screw up this particular job, but not your entire life. No reason to end it.

I can understand why your mom is upset, but don't take her words literally when she says you've ruined your entire life because you haven't. In case you haven't done so, it might be good to apologize since it sounds like she put in effort to help you get the job. And finally just remember to be more patient next time. It sounds like this company did not have a good onboarding / training process, but at the same time you shouldn't quit without at least talking to your supervisor about it (I understand you talked to them but you basically led with "I quit," which isn't going to do you any favors).
 
The interview was only a half-hour. I didn't think I got it anyway since I wasn't getting a good perception of the interviewers, they didn't show me around, and they wanted to get me out as fast as possible. So I was really surprised that I got it. But, damn, I don't think I could've handled that. I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I can't just be sitting around and bored anymore.

Get a job at McDonald's and have a few kids then. Definitely no sitting around doing nothing.
 

MMarston

Was getting caught part of your plan?
The interview was only a half-hour. I didn't think I got it anyway since I wasn't getting a good perception of the interviewers, they didn't show me around, and they wanted to get me out as fast as possible. So I was really surprised that I got it. But, damn, I don't think I could've handled that. I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I can't just be sitting around and bored anymore.

You were only there for 2.5 hours



Also sitting around talking to us here falls under that same description.
 

shoreu

Member
What the hell were you thinking you just started.. They may not have everything ready for you but damn if you keep this job your boss is always gonna have that in the back of their mind.
 

GHG

Gold Member
Wtf. Who does this?

You could have even come on GAF during the time when you were sat there doing nothing, made a thread and asked.
 

Skeyser

Member
The best part is that you wasted your time on the phone instead of walking around to get to know who you're working with, and then rage quitted because no one came to hold your hand.
 

Ledhead

Member
I spent five days doing jack shit with no computer, twiddling my thumbs at my desk until the corporate machine got its act together and got me settled in. Like others have said, this is pretty par for the course for a corporate job. I just saw it as getting paid to laze around and read.
 

Ra\/en

Member
Is this a joke?

I feel that you literally did the worst possible thing in that situation (aside from stripping naked and running through the halls i guess).

Wow. Last time I started a new job I literally just sat around for 2 weeks and read standard operating procedures, did some half-arsed training sessions and twiddled my thumbs. This is normal.
 
This is super, super weird of you OP.

Why is your thought process "this is on these people. They are wrong in how they are treating me"

and not "this is on me. Time to show them what I have and show a little initiative on my first day"

Don't put your problems on other people. Solve them yourself. It's like you offloaded your anxiety by redirecting it to the people around you. Very unhealthy defense mechanism.

But hey, with all of that being said, you landed the job, right? Time to get another one and learn. That's all that life is... fucking up and learning how to learn from it :) GL!
 

G0523

Member
Did you go back to her after the tour and ask "When does training start?" If so, what was her response? If not, why didn't you? If she appeared to be busy, did you ask when she would be available or what you should do in the meantime?

Honest questions, not judging you: did you want this job at all; was this something you actively searched? Or did they call you and you didn't particularly care about it?

I didn't really want this job. I loved my old one working at a small business and working with video games. I didn't actively search it. My mom hooked me up and kinda made me do it because if I said no then I never would've heard the end of it. But now I'm really not hearing the end of it from her because she keeps calling me, telling me that I fucked up my future, yelling at me over the phone, saying "how hard she worked" to get me this job, etc.. It's not really helping my mood and I just want to kill her or myself.
 

Skeyser

Member
Though to make you feel better op, losing that job is not a big deal, with your attitude it would have happened anyways. Just gotta work on being a more mature and professional employee. It's a wake up call, really.
 

Sethista

Member
Look OP im sorry, but you should really thnk what lead you to do this.

I worked for a major company for a number of years, and in my first week I had 0 to do. So I focused on learning about the processes they had in place, and even wrote a bunch of them down, since they were not official.

Its weird to me that your first response to this situation was to go up to your boss, accuse the company of not being a fit for you for them not being organized enough, and just quit. I never heard of anything like this before. Instead of initiative, you decided the place didnt fit your needs properly, so fuck it im out.

And now you are talking about killing yourself, saying corporate life is not for you, etc... I wonder how old you are?

Please listen to everyone here and reassess what do you want to do, ina general sense.
 
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Lunar15

Member
OP, you've also got to have perspective. As someone who has hired and trained a lot of people, there were definitely times where there was an influx of employees to my division at the absolute worst time for me, so there's just gaps in how much I can give to that person. I have training and stuff set up, but if I'm busy with high priority stuff, I'm just not always going to have everything for you.

It sucks and it makes me feel awful, but a lot of times there's not a lot I can do. I'm not in a huge company that has all this stuff set up, it's often me flying by the seat of my pants.

Jobs take time to set up. There's processes, rules, and all sorts of things you have to learn before they can let you start getting into the nitty gritty. I have to make sure that you're able to do things I need competently before I open the floodgates and let you really handle the hard stuff.

What did the supervisor tell you when you asked about the training? There's so many missing details. This honestly sounds like a ton of social anxiety? Were you so overcome by anxiety that you found a way out? I've known people like this, and have felt like this myself sometimes, but you've got to find a way to deal with it.
 

BosSin

Member
I sat around waiting for some code to finish executing for 4 hours the other day. In the meantime I did some code reviews, checked jenkins for failing unit tests and ensuring builds were ok and watched some Cassandra tutorials.

You need to learn how to make your own work
 

Alucrid

Banned
I didn't really want this job. I loved my old one working at a small business and working with video games. I didn't actively search it. My mom hooked me up and kinda made me do it because if I said no then I never would've heard the end of it. But now I'm really not hearing the end of it from her because she keeps calling me, telling me that I fucked up my future, yelling at me over the phone, saying "how hard she worked" to get me this job, etc.. It's not really helping my mood and I just want to kill her or myself.
Both of those things are ways to actually fuck up your life. Don't do either.
 
I feel that you literally did the worst possible thing in that situation (aside from stripping naked and running through the halls i guess).
He could plead insanity in that case, which means if he got fired he could sue for discrimination due to mental health issues and then make mad money off the company, buy an island and just sit around doing nothing for the rest of his life.

Oh, wait.
 

E92 M3

Member
OP sometimes a little hard love is needed. That's why I don't feel bad about everyone dogpiling you. Sometimes a person needs to hear that they fucked up, period.

We've all fucked up here at one point or another.
 

Angry Grimace

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "does something taste funny to you?"
I honestly have no clue how you reached the conclusion you should just leave.
 
The interview was only a half-hour. I didn't think I got it anyway since I wasn't getting a good perception of the interviewers, they didn't show me around, and they wanted to get me out as fast as possible. So I was really surprised that I got it. But, damn, I don't think I could've handled that. I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I can't just be sitting around and bored anymore.

Man, this just can't be your attitude going forward. You gotta work to eat, and employment is hard. Most people in the world trade huge portions of their time doing work that is a hell of a lot more boring, miserable, or dangerous than what you experienced today.

You just don't have the luxury of "[being] at a point in [your] life where [you] can't just be sitting around and bored anymore." You do what you gotta do to be gainfully employed. Most people don't like their jobs very much. Many absolutely hate their jobs. A boring cubicle job is a privilege.
 

entremet

Member
I didn't really want this job. I loved my old one working at a small business and working with video games. I didn't actively search it. My mom hooked me up and kinda made me do it because if I said no then I never would've heard the end of it. But now I'm really not hearing the end of it from her because she keeps calling me, telling me that I fucked up my future, yelling at me over the phone, saying "how hard she worked" to get me this job, etc.. It's not really helping my mood and I just want to kill her or myself.

Breathe and relax.

Did this job pay better than your other one?

Why did she want you to take this job?

Let's just say you're incredibly privileged to even have a parent pull strings for you. Go to the job seeker thread to see what I'm talking about.
 
I didn't really want this job. I loved my old one working at a small business and working with video games. I didn't actively search it. My mom hooked me up and kinda made me do it because if I said no then I never would've heard the end of it. But now I'm really not hearing the end of it from her because she keeps calling me, telling me that I fucked up my future, yelling at me over the phone, saying "how hard she worked" to get me this job, etc.. It's not really helping my mood and I just want to kill her or myself.

OP,

I think this job issue is the least of your issues. You should really consider getting help.
 
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