Bruce Springsteen
Member
If I felt I was ghosted by someone and they contact me again I proceed with extreme caution with them, pretty much do to them what they did to me x2. If they still try to communicate that's on them
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Dating-Age |OT5| Halp me pls. In the bathroom.
- Thread starter Septimius
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If I felt I was ghosted by someone and they contact me again I proceed with extreme caution with them, pretty much do to them what they did to me x2. If they still try to communicate that's on them
Jawmuncher
Member
Which thread was that?
Mobile Suit Gooch
Grundle: The Awakening
Count Dookkake
Member
One of the great things about dating someone new is learning about them. Their likes, their quirks, their POV and so on. Everyone is different and this never gets old to me. I had a neat learning experience last night.
In the middle of the night, I was woken up by the new girl.
Not by snoring, but rather by sleep masturbating. One hand, the other, both. On and on and on. It was spectacular.
I've seen it before, but never for this duration. I had to rub one out in retaliation.
In the middle of the night, I was woken up by the new girl.
Not by snoring, but rather by sleep masturbating. One hand, the other, both. On and on and on. It was spectacular.
I've seen it before, but never for this duration. I had to rub one out in retaliation.
Jawmuncher
Member
Ahh that thread.
Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
I think it's harder for me to hang out with old friends, but not a big deal for newer friends. Older friends I can see because so much has changed since we were first friends.
This couldn't be more false.
It's my truth, so...no, it's not false. I love my friends. I hang out with them sometimes (they'll come by and play games or we'll go for tea), but hanging out with people is exhausting. So in general for me, going out to a movie is better solo, going out to eat is better solo, going traveling is better solo, etc etc.
So there
Bruce Springsteen
Member
Please don't
ZackieChan
Member
Or maybe this - http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1219632
j/k
It's my truth, so...no, it's not false. I love my friends. I hang out with them sometimes (they'll come by and play games or we'll go for tea), but hanging out with people is exhausting. So in general for me, going out to a movie is better solo, going out to eat is better solo, going traveling is better solo, etc etc.
So there
I'm like this a lot, too. I do travel solo (which is to say I'm "solo" 9 months out of the year), but I generally like to find some dates or friendships while traveling. Half my time is spent out with others, the other half out by myself. Being around others so much is exhausting, so I totally understand.
Eh, probably not a good idea. But I guess it depends on what the end product looks like. It probably isn't necessary, and you're going overboard with the photos thing. Non-pro photos of you doing fun/cool things are probably enough.
Well it's hang out with my guy friends or hang out solo, since I can't find women who are attracted to me.
Maybe try making a couple of platonic female friends. One thing that really helped me understand how to just talk to women was hanging out more and more with girls. I've never gone from friends with a girl to dating them or sleeping with them or anything like that, but the more I've sort of demystified them, the better I've gotten with women.
One thing it's really done is made women a lot less scary to me.
I almost don't know what to do at this point, as it has been four months since me and my girlfriend through four years broke up, and we have cut all contact to each other, though I know that she is together with her ex-boyfriend again, so I can never trust her. That said, I don't know how to move on. I try be occupied by watching a few tv shows, and read the internet, staying in touch with family on facebook, and I visit my parents sometimes and go to a photo studio every Monday, Wednesday and Thursday but besides that I'm staying at home, and having a little hard time completely letting her go. I have let her go, but she still pops up in my mind from time to time. Is this just something that'll go away with time? I'm feeling down again.
I have even been texting with this new girl I met on OKCupid less than a week ago, and we text daily, and I get happy every time we talk about stuff. I would probably like to see where this is going, but I don't want to bring emotions or thoughts from my past relationships with me.
I have even been texting with this new girl I met on OKCupid less than a week ago, and we text daily, and I get happy every time we talk about stuff. I would probably like to see where this is going, but I don't want to bring emotions or thoughts from my past relationships with me.
Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
It's my truth, so...no, it's not false. I love my friends. I hang out with them sometimes (they'll come by and play games or we'll go for tea), but hanging out with people is exhausting. So in general for me, going out to a movie is better solo, going out to eat is better solo, going traveling is better solo, etc etc.
So there
But that's not what you said. Yes, I'm also introverted and can get exhausted but you said it ALWAYS the better option to be by yourself which apparently even you don't believe because you just said you hang out with friends. So yeah, I feel comfortable in saying it's false.
Pasta_Soup
Member
I'd mix in some exercise with your other activities (if you aren't already doing so), but it looks like you're on the right track for moving on. Four years is a long time, so don't be overly hard on yourself. It takes time, man.
Talking to new women is always a good idea, and will help you move forward. Don't worry too much about where it might go, just keep chatting and exploring these new connections! Try to have fun!
Miles Quaritch
Member
It'll go away, just make sure the feelings and emotions that stir up when you think about her don't have an effect on what you've got going now.
Out of curiosity, why texting daily? Have you brought up meeting? Do it sooner rather than later...
Out of curiosity, why texting daily? Have you brought up meeting? Do it sooner rather than later...
Miles Quaritch
Member
Seems a little petty no?
Saying that, those who ghost and come back aren't exactly undeserving of that kind of response.
I asked her, if she want to go out sometime next week.
I almost signed up for the gym two days ago, but I hesitated because I don't have anyone to go with, and I'm not used to gyms. I do want to start up though, really.
Miles Quaritch
Member
What did she say?
Don't worry about going alone, it's not that big of a deal. No-one will be wondering why you're alone or make you feel uncomfortable and it'll be good in helping to reach out to others maybe even make new friends.
Don't worry about going alone, it's not that big of a deal. No-one will be wondering why you're alone or make you feel uncomfortable and it'll be good in helping to reach out to others maybe even make new friends.
Lone_Prodigy
Member
Four years is a long time, and if you lived together, being in the same place (but alone) will bring back thoughts and feelings. It'll take time, but in the meantime try to keep busy and make new memories to replace the old ones.
She actually just replied me and said we can meet. So I suppose we are going out into the city next week. I just don't know what to do. I want us to have a fun time first and foremost, so maybe take her to the amusement park? Or that's too early? Maybe just for a drink at some bar perhaps.
[edit] oh, she wants to meet me this Sumday already. Which is fine with me actually. I'm just nervous because I know myself, and I usually panick and I don't want that to happen again.
We lived together here in my apartment. Sometimes I imagine a ghost of her reminiscing the good times. It's so hurtful.
Pasta_Soup
Member
You should definitely give it a shot. Ask Fitness Gaf for a beginner's workout routine. If you don't know the lifts/exercises they're suggesting, look them up and watch videos on proper form. Also, if you join a gym, don't be afraid to ask the staff questions. They're always eager to help
As cool as it is to have a gym buddy, I'm at the gym by myself 99% of the time.
It can seem intimidating at first, but give it a couple of weeks - you'll feel perfectly fine being there and wonder why you were even intimidated in the first place.
Oh, and for a first date, I'd suggest doing something low key, like drinks. Maybe go for a walk afterward if you're getting a good vibe. No point in doing anything extravagant and investing so much time/money into someone you met online and barely know.
Miles Quaritch
Member
Fantastic news. Amusement park is good for a first date. Good luck, just remember to have fun and that the past is the past.
Miles Quaritch
Member
Are amusement parks really that expensive though? I can't imagine it'll leave a huge dent in his wallet and there's no need for Mad to pay for the entire thing anyway...
They're really expensive, there are a couple around here, one is $35 and the other is about $30 for all day passes. That's not mentioning the overpriced food and drinks ($5 bottled waters and the like) so it's way too much for a first date, and may also be a big time investment as well and you could be stuck with a few awkward hours listening to screaming kids and sitting uncomfortably close to someone you're not getting along with.
Yeah, I think I'm just gonna bring her to the walking street, and there'll be take-out food, and bars, and benches outside and stuff to do. Though it's a Sunday, so most would be closed there. I'm also super nervous - I suffer from social anxiety disorder but will try to look away from that, because that should not define me anymore.
I took a woman once to the amusement parks (second date). This was Coney Island, so not many rides. We had wristbands for unlimited rides, and I made her go on a ton of thrill rides.
Bad idea as she ended up throwing up at some point lol.
But it was a unique date idea and the Broadway was nice at the night.
Bad idea as she ended up throwing up at some point lol.
But it was a unique date idea and the Broadway was nice at the night.
Krauser Kat
Member
i have a membership at the Chicago Art Institute. Its cheap and a fantastic first date. There are on site cafes and a out side places to sit and chat. Is there a museum close by or something culturally interesting you can use as a backdrop for a walk and talk.
Messofanego
Banned
Are you dating an Animorph?
Miles Quaritch
Member
That doesn't seem like a huge amount to me, but I guess it depends on individual budgets.
I spent around £65 on my first date with my current girlfriend, didn't think it was a huge investment considering we went to two places and had a bite to eat (which she insisted on paying for)
Finally have a date for tonight
Met her on Okcupid on Monday. Talked that day for 45 min on the phone. I guess she is big into sex, so that's mainly what we talked about. And having been sending erotic texts for the past couple of days
I am meeting her after work today. We aren't going to her place, bc she doesn't believe in 1st dates there, so not sure where we are going.
Any suggestions?
One where pda can be had or more opportunity
Back up plan is dinner
Met her on Okcupid on Monday. Talked that day for 45 min on the phone. I guess she is big into sex, so that's mainly what we talked about. And having been sending erotic texts for the past couple of days
I am meeting her after work today. We aren't going to her place, bc she doesn't believe in 1st dates there, so not sure where we are going.
Any suggestions?
One where pda can be had or more opportunity
Back up plan is dinner
Miles Quaritch
Member
Park? Night Club?
Royal_Phalanx
Member
Have dinner, then move on to a club, dance, make out and hopefully get laid would be my suggestion.
Man, maybe I should just be her friend and nothing more. I'm pretty sure I don't want a date out of this now, as she just told me, that she is gonna move to Spain and will get a job there in Barcelona in three years time. Seems like a girl I really shouldn't pursue further, but maybe just be friends with.
Miles Quaritch
Member
She's telling you about plans three years from now? How bizarre...what brought about that discussion?
Where are you both from again?
Miles Quaritch
Member
Or just head straight to the club and see where it goes.
Food = opportunity to mess it all up.
Tried being friends with my ex because I thought I could work through my jealousy and she's an awesome girl. But I couldn't stop myself from being too curious about her and her new love interest, so I decided to call off a friendship as I can't handle it. I definitely don't don't recommend trying to stay friends unless you're completely past wanting something with that person
Royal_Phalanx
Member
I dunno, I've always been told that eating before drinking made you get drunk slower.
Miles Quaritch
Member
Or just drink in moderation and try not to get drunk?
Who wants drunk sex anyway?
Royal_Phalanx
Member
Fair point, can't risk the whiskey dick
I'm from Denmark and she's from the Philippines but is here as an au pair. But I don't want to end up making the same mistake as the last time were my girlfriend was an au pair and I had to move to Sweden and marry her so she could stay here, which I didn't and so the relationship ended. I don't want to end up in that situation again, or maybe I would be ready for it this time, but my conscience tells me to keep this one at friend-level.
Miles Quaritch
Member
I've heard a few horror stories about drunk sex. Woman giving oral and vomiting, falling asleep during sex, waking up in a pool of vomit and diarrhoea.
Never heard of whiskey dick though. Just how drunk do you have to be for that to be an issue?
Miles Quaritch
Member
Royal_Phalanx
Member
Never meant that drunk, lol. I feel being slightly- moderately drunk but not being drunk to the level of puking is the best state to be in when you want to have fun. Some guys have problems getting hard when drunk, I think it depends.
I'm having a really hard time adjusting to single life. Seems like it's so difficult for me getting over my ex of four years, especially as she lived here. I have been throwing out furniture and been super depressed after coming back from my vacation. That's a combination of not having a girlfriend and missing my family in another country. I just can't go a day without giving my ex a slight thought, and sometimes it makes me wanna stay in bed, while other times I don't care. I just know that I don't trust my ex, that I don't ever want her back, and that I want to move on and be happy, and be with somebody I want to make happy and share moments with. I even think about fatherhood once in a while.
ZackieChan
Member
It's just a date, bro. You're already thinking about marriage and three years from now? Slow your roll.
Also, your name is Madridista - shouldn't you be in Madrid?
I'm not thinking three years ahead. It was her who mentioned her plan is to move to Barcelona, which wouldn't bode too well for me I would say. In fact, she might already move to Spain in one year from now, if she decides not to be a student here in Denmark as her host family offered to pay for studies, but she don't feel like going back to school and she have no desire of learning the Danish language either.It's just a date, bro. You're already thinking about marriage and three years from now? Slow your roll.
Also, your name is Madridista - shouldn't you be in Madrid?
My time is like 90% myself, 10% others haha. Other people are exhausting.
Oh stop, if you want me to say 99% of the time it's the better option, I will.
If I hang out with my friends (which isn't that often), I generally like to be at my place instead of out in public. I think it's because people = tiring, so friends + my own space = a bit less tiring.
If I go out in public, it's usually me on my own, so even though people are around, it's still "just" me, so me + not my own space = a bit less tiring.
Other people + not my own space = just let me sleep forevermore.
ZackieChan
Member
You haven't even met this girl yet, correct? Don't you see how you're thinking way too far ahead and making excuses for not meeting? Are you the type to fall in love with Au Pairs from the Philippines really easy or something? Why not go out, and then see if all of this is worth worrying about?
If you two do end up falling in love, don't you think that you'll make concessions or comprises on where you'll be in 3 years?
Lone_Prodigy
Member
I don't know you, your ex, or this new girl, but this sounds like a green card scenario (marry a foreigner so you can stay in their country).
Also, it sounds like you're not ready to date yet.
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