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[InfiniteBento]

I dunno, I'm not really fond of the "he wasn't paying enough attention to me" justification for cheating. It's used so often too.

blaming the other person for your own actions is bullshit but most people are too prideful to admit they cheated for their own selfish reasons.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

I dunno, I'm not really fond of the "he wasn't paying enough attention to me" justification for cheating. It's used so often too.

People often choose to blame others for their mistakes. Why take the blame when you can just shift it?

blaming the other person for your own actions is bullshit but most people are too prideful to admit they cheated for their own selfish reasons.

This too. Why say "I'm horny and want to fuck other people" when instead it's "YOU didn't do this right therefore I am justified!" Takes all the responsibility away from me and puts it on you. Easy peasy.

Obviously I don't agree with that but that's the "logic" behind such a chump move.

 

[asagami_]

Wtf 79 pages?

We were worried about the OLED TV.

 

[Darth Ghandi]

Hey OP, chin up!

Spent the better part of my day reading this thread (and smoking blunts) and I must say you are handling this like a fuckin champ, no two ways about it bruv.

Also regarding the talk you have about "not paying her attention".
Be fucking careful with that line of thought.
It's dangerous cause it has SOME merit but that merit is that you learn and grow from the knowledge.
You don't want it to turn into something like "I could have made a difference if only I didn't X or Y".
Regarding your passions and interests: Don't let them rule you in every aspect of your life, but also don't let others dictate what is an "OK" hobby.
Fuck that, you don't want a partner who looks down on the things you enjoys.
She doesn't need to enjoy them herself, she just should be cool with you doing the things you like.

Strength brother!

 

[KingSnake]

I dunno, I'm not really fond of the "he wasn't paying enough attention to me" justification for cheating. It's used so often too.

Because it's true in many cases. It's not a justification, it's an enhancer. Frustration and doubts make people cross some birthdays boundaries that normally wouldn't be crossed. Still doesn't make cheating OK and the guilt is still 100% with the charter.

 

[diablos991]

Not exactly trying to defend the GF, but everybody keeps saying "cheating cheating cheating cheating cheating".

At least to me, a bit of sexting, and full blown fucking, are on two extremely different levels in the cheating hierarchy. As far as we know only the former has taken place.

Of course even that much is very problematic and the OP wanting to end it can still be justifiable. But even the OP admitted there are three sides to every story (including the strong possibility of some inattentiveness and/or communication issues he shares blame for).

I think the one 100% safe conclusion here though is definitely that the friend is trash. I don't think there'll be ANY disagreement there, lol.

As long as we're arguing a spectrum you could say fucking a dude isn't cheating as much as having a fivesome with a bunch of Craigslist dudes.

 

[Mascot]

She knows I go on gaming forums, always takes the piss and calls me a geek, but she'd have no idea what Neogaf is.

He knows I go on WhatsApp, always takes the piss and calls me a geek, but he'd have no idea how to access the dickpics on my iPad amirite..?

 

[Mammoth Jones]

We were worried about the OLED TV.

I'm still worried about it. Fuck the bull....

I have a bad feeling she gonna run back over there with two dudes and try and brute force shit...

 

[Weevilone]

The whole bit about him playing too many games, or her not getting enough attention is speculation.. that's it.

It doesn't matter anyways. Long relationships get comfortable, so people tend to put forth less effort. I'm sure she wasn't treating him in the same way as she did during the earlier, more exciting stages. It's just what happens.

She chose to go chase the excitement elsewhere. That's on her. She wanted the comfort and security of the long term relationship, along with the excitement of something new. Can't have both.

 

[br3wnor]

I'm still worried about it. Fuck the bull....

I have a bad feeling she gonna run back over there with two dudes and try and brute force shit...

All she has to do is go to the cops w/ her copy of the lease (if she has it) and say my roommate won't let me access my apartment. He should probably let her in if she comes back, especially if his parents are there to kind of act as a buffer while he gets his shit together. As fucked up as this whole situation is, it's still legally her apartment.

 

[Monochrome_F3ar]

"Hey honey you wanna explain what this is?"

 

[sflufan]

We were worried about the OLED TV.

AND the high-end gaming PC!

 

[SilentRob]

I feel like this is the first GAF thread of this kind that didn't turn against the OP at some point because he left out important parts of the story or ended up going about the problem the worst way possible.

This is good. You are going about this the best way possible, dude - at least as far as we could know from reading your posts.

 

[Weevilone]

All she has to do is go to the cops w/ her copy of the lease (if she has it) and say my roommate won't let me access my apartment. He should probably let her in if she comes back, especially if his parents are there to kind of act as a buffer while he gets his shit together. As fucked up as this whole situation is, it's still legally her apartment.

And he can explain that he was fearful of them getting violent and breaking things the last time they came by. Police can diffuse that stuff.

 

[Green Embers]

The whole bit about him playing too many games, or her not getting enough attention is speculation.. that's it.

It doesn't matter anyways. Long relationships get comfortable, so people tend to put forth less effort. I'm sure she wasn't treating him in the same way as she did during the earlier, more exciting stages. It's just what happens.

She chose to go chase the excitement elsewhere. That's on her.

I agree. If someone isn't being emotionally fulfilled, instead of going out and cheating, why not actually hold a conversation with the partner about how they're feeling? It reminds me of movies or tv shows where issues could be resolved so much faster if people communicated with each other.

 

[Oveja Negra]

Holy reverend crap, I missed that Sunhi's post. I'm in tears.

This guy is truly a legend, not in this planet but in the entire Universe, and if String Theory is correct, he is a legend in every damn parallel universe too.

 

[Zukuu]

You should let her keep something to sleep on. Grab the dog, tho. You will miss it more than you realize later down the line.

 

[The Last Wizard]

You should let her keep something to sleep on tho. Grab the dog, tho. You will miss it more than you realize later down the line.

Yup, plus do you think she'll be fit to care for it.

 

[Crazyorloco]

How are you holding up now man?

This was my 2nd time being cheated on in a row, so I'm jaded with relationships and people in general right now. And what sucks the worst is that I still sometimes get the feeling that I made a 'mistake' because I did care about her/love her a lot. But I have to constantly remind myself of what she put me through.

It is rough. I can definitely understand being jaded. It really messes with your head. I think "is everyone like this?!?!"

Right now I am pretty much anti-relationships too. I do get calls from my ex still, but I ignore them. I keep thinking of all the lies. I feel I can't trust anyone. I guess this can help us be more aware of crap from people.

Now I try to think of the positives of being single. Doing whatever you want; going to museums, gaming, events, buying stuff for yourself, having more money, not having to report to anyone, finding interests etc...it's our time to heal.

 

[TheContact]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

 

[jahepi]

Better late than never, be thankful that you realized that your ex-girl was cheating on you, imagining if you had children with her, the problem could be worst, you deserve better.

 

[Jarate]

Has nothing to do with location. I've had woman in the US pull the same shit.

My friend even had her lie and say he hit her which he never did. Didn't matter to her friends and family. Suddenly she's a token of sympathy even after getting pregnant by cheating with another dude.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISXiFJS9D5A

 

[TheOMan]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Welp - that doesn't sound good.

 

[InfiniteBento]

People often choose to blame others for their mistakes. Why take the blame when you can just shift it?

This too. Why say "I'm horny and want to fuck other people" when instead it's "YOU didn't do this right therefore I am justified!" Takes all the responsibility away from me and puts it on you. Easy peasy.

Obviously I don't agree with that but that's the "logic" behind such a chump move.

Casting blame on other people for your own actions is absolutely moronic.

 

[Spikematic]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Holy shit. I really hope it isn't what you're dreading it is. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you man.

This thread has really been something else. I'm sorry for you OP, but as many people have continuously said here, you'll be fine. Chin up and good luck!

 

[slider]

I'd take my dog in this situation but be pragmatic about renting with a pet. Gets that much harder. Unless your folks can play a blinder for you again.

 

[magawolaz]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

uh oh.

 

[Lactose_Intolerant]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Send Jeff B a dick pic

 

[RevoDS]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

The deceit itself means her motives aren't clean.

Sorry man, but there's no way anything good comes out of this.

 

[gconsole]

But what do you want OP to do? Print the conversations and paste it through the city? Email them to her parents? Shame her to every friend? I'll be extremely childish, that's not how decent people act.

That's what i don't understand, people act like this is a crime that should be harshly punished to no end, why not throw stones at her like they do in some cultures?

She screwed up, he doesn't want to be with her anymore and it's taking the necessary actions to it. That's it.

She'll be alone, without a place to live, without furniture, without a dog (maybe), and without someone with whom she spent the last 4 years to have her back. I think that's a just punishment for her.

I guess the problem is, from the sound of it she might twist the story in front of her friend and made OP the bad guy?

 

[Sho_Nuff82]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Man this thread has broken GAF.

Good luck to you too man.

I guess the problem is, from the sound of it she might twist the story in front of her friend and made OP the bad guy?

To everyone that's her friend exclusively (and this is kind of a red flag; couples that work out well together long term don't really have exclusive friends because they hang out with each other so much), she's only going to portray their breakup as a breach of her privacy.

The screenshots are a last resort if she tries to badmouth him to friends they have in common. If she's smart, she'll stay quiet about it. I'm guessing she won't, but whatever.

 

[E92 M3]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Start documenting stuff now so you don't get screwed in court.

 

[Crazyorloco]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Ouch. See this is hard. It's snapchat so it's harder to get evidence. I wish you luck man.

Man this thread has broken GAF.

 

[Feel the Swift]

Better late than never, be thankful that you realized that your ex-girl was cheating on you, imagining if you had children with her, the problem could be worst, you deserve better.

Reading this post then the one above it is rough

 

[Lashley]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Ah shit

I hope somehow this is innocent

EDIT: This is what I always fear when I enter a relationship, 10 years down the road or whatever, it'll be ruined by her cheating

 

[Symphonia]

Ouch. See this is hard. It's snapchat so it's harder to get evidence. I wish you luck man.

You can screenshot Snapchat.

 

[B.O.O.M]

This fking thread is now making me paranoid about relationships altogether...

 

[Cow Mengde]

We were worried about the OLED TV.

AND the high-end gaming PC!

Ok, fair enough. I would be worried too.

 

[TheContact]

I'm hesitant to confront because I never actually saw any dick picks or any saved chats or anything. Just seems weird to hide the name. If she was snap chatting someone named Jeff I wouldn't care it's that she renamed it to Jess which is odd to me

 

[Spoiled Milk]

I'm hesitant to confront because I never actually saw any dick picks or any saved chats or anything. Just seems weird to hide the name. If she was snap chatting someone named Jeff I wouldn't care it's that she renamed it to Jess which is odd to me

I think it's obvious that she's hiding it from you.

 

[Always-honest]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Oh damn i hope it's nothing man. 2 kids.... pffffff

 

[D4Danger]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

It's all a bit of a laugh (for us anyway) to joke about a tv but when you hear about this kind of thing and kids are involved it's so sad. I hope it's nothing and things work out for you.

 

[MrS]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

My condolences

 

[Idiot]

Alright, so when I left this thread last night, everyone was just thirsting after OP. Apparently nothing massive happened, but anyone wanna give me a quick fresher?

Also, I see apparently USA is possibly starting the same discovery.

 

[qcf x2]

I know I'm not perfect, and maybe I don't spend as much time with her as she likes, maybe me playing the PS4 too much instead of having sex with her was why she ended up looking elsewhere.

I just think that regardless of all that, the moment she felt unhappy she should have told me. When I played too much football manager she made it clear by throwing my laptop.

Maybe I need a woman that's into games, I sometimes read about people who say they game together, and that sounds great, but the woman I meet aren't into gaming at all.

It's not that, nope. You could have paid her all the attention in the world and she would have done it behind your back with the justification that you're too clingy and soft. If somebody has it in them to cheat, they are going to cheat, it doesn't matter how awesome they have it. Doesn't matter if the other guy is significantly worse looking, is a bum who lives with his parents, etc. So don't bother thinking up things you might have done that contributed to somebody else being a POS. Specifically with regards to today's world, the "liked the attention" excuse could extend infinitely, as even if you're with somebody 24/7, they can be multitasking by DM'ing dozens of guys at the same time because they like the attention. Ultimately it's no excuse, as you could easily have done the same if you weren't a decent person.

As for looking for a gaming girl, I say keep doing what you do. Don't look for a specific type, from personal experience people with a ton of common interests are better as friends than SO's. Chemistry is more important than hobbies.

 

[Yurikerr]

I guess the problem is, from the sound of it she might twist the story in front of her friend and made OP the bad guy?

I understand, but as I said to another poster, from what OP told us about the friend that texted him and went there this morning, the thug life girl will frame him as the asshole even if the ex-girl admit it.

And at the end of the day OCD has all the proof he need. If someone tries to frame him as the bad one he can stand his ground. There's no need to on the offense right now.

I, personally, think it's better to assume that she won't try to be a scumbag instead of ruining everything because of a possibility.

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Relax man, maybe she's just planning a surprise party for you and this Jeff guy is from the bakery. (Trying to be upbeat here, sorry if it sounds as a bad taste joke)

 

[Kaako]

So.. Went to get my wife's phone for her and saw a notification on her screen for snapchat someone named "Jess B" said "send me a pic" but when you actually see the user name it's Jeff B; she renamed the account to appear female. Also there's a phone number in her contacts for a "Jess B" but when you call it, a voicemail came up with a guy named Jeff. Cool day. I know if I confront her about it she will freak out. Maybe it's nothing but it seeks suspicious. We have 2 kids together too

Holy hell, godspeed to you sir. This is just sad all around.

 

[Shabadoo69]

I followed this thread all day yesterday and it kept me very entertained. I feel for sure for the OP. That is just shitty, sorry man.
I went home last night and told my wife all about it and showed her the funny comments and memes and even that video someone made. fast forward to this morning, I was making my lunch and she was getting ready in the bathroom. I went to tell her bye and give her a kiss. I commented on her dress she was wearing and how good she looked. she looked at me and said "Well I fancy a dick today."
I almost lost it. That's why I love my wife.

 

[Arkos]

page 18

GTFO with this 100 ppp bullshit

 

[Huge Succeeded]

Posting a pic with OP+gf from another thread

I keep hearing people say this, but it was my understanding that the guy actually posted a picture of a completely unrelated woman (who posts here for that matter, and has posted in this thread about it) under the impression that she was OP's ex and that he was doing 'solid detective work', am I wrong?