My Girlfriend Keeps Getting Stoned All Day and Playing Fallout
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Joe T.
Member
This might come across a little long-winded, but the topic is something I had to deal with about a couple of years ago and probably shouldn't be taken lightly if you felt the need to post about it here.
I had a girlfriend that was into games. She played Halo, CoD, Uncharted and Final Fantasy XI with me, all in moderation while we did the usual healthy relationship stuff like spending quality time together, watching TV shows like The Sopranos, going out, etc. She even played through my copy of FFXIII knowing I was a fan of the series, but disliked the game too much to play it myself. It was like being in a dream at first, thinking I was the luckiest guy in the world.
Then she suddenly lost interest in games, with the exception of FFXI. It became an unhealthy obsession for her as she got caught up in the endless grind that is end game content. She would play it for 8, 12, sometimes 24 hours straight. Entire weekends disappeared in front of the game. Hygiene, food, even visits we had by friends and family were treated as annoying distractions she didn't want to deal with. A poor, little kitten she had begged me to adopt was being neglected by her now, too, but hey, she seemed happy, so who was I to complain, right?
I had put countless hours into FFXI myself, known by virtually everyone on our server at the time, so I was navigating a tricky course. I wanted to spend time with her away from the game, Friday or Saturday nights if nothing else, but trying to communicate that to her always put her on the defensive. There would be days where she let up and it looked like the ship had steered itself back on track, days that I treasured every second of, but they were few and far between. When I thought things couldn't get any worse, she switched from FFXI to WoW...
Our relationship was clearly suffering at that point and it felt like I was the only one who cared. She had become a completely different person than the one I had come to know. I don't remember how long it went on for exactly, at least a few months, but it came to a point where she was trying to quit smoking, couldn't resist the urge anymore and asked me to go buy her a pack because she didn't want to leave the game. I refused unless she came with me, an attempt to spend a little time together away from the game. She blew up and we both wound up yelling at each other, so I went for a long walk to cool myself down and think. When I got back home I found out my mom had been by and the two of them had, to my surprise, gotten physical with one another (still having a hard time believing that ever happened). Cops were called and my girlfriend panicked, so she quickly got a friend to pick her up. Realizing the mess she had gotten herself into, she checked herself into a place that helped her deal with online addiction.
Long story short, if you love her be careful not to let your girl fall into a similar trap. I'd suggest following Septimius' sound advice. Playing her heart out in Fallout for a few weeks might just be harmless fun if she's respecting her work schedule and not completely ignoring you, but I'd start to get worried if it goes beyond that.
As Final Fantasy XI reminds everyone:
hipbabboom
Huh? What did I say? Did I screw up again? :(
SkyMasterson
Member
Kadayi
Banned
Yeah I've known a few like that. Once the hooks are in its srs bsns, until pretty much every quest is completed in full.
OP do not let your girlfriend near Skyrim ever......
This thread is very interesting. As a married man myself, and always battling my wife because she says I play too much (she says games are for children, but then she proceeds to play Farmville, and other FB crap, oh the irony!).
But although I usually play everyday for many hours straight, I am always switching games, switching platforms (PS3 to Vita) and take breaks every hour (I go smoke a cigar, watch some TV...).
I never could understand those stories of people who get addicted to a single game (like WoW, Second Life), and have to go to rehab and stuff.
Anyways, OP's girl behavior does not sound very healthy, maybe it's the marijuana that's making her act kind of autistic and OCD-ish? I don't know...
And I'm curious to know they're ages.
But although I usually play everyday for many hours straight, I am always switching games, switching platforms (PS3 to Vita) and take breaks every hour (I go smoke a cigar, watch some TV...).
I never could understand those stories of people who get addicted to a single game (like WoW, Second Life), and have to go to rehab and stuff.
Anyways, OP's girl behavior does not sound very healthy, maybe it's the marijuana that's making her act kind of autistic and OCD-ish? I don't know...
And I'm curious to know they're ages.
shanshan310
Member
Any kind of addiction can be dangerous, sounds like your girlfriend needs some help. I've been on game binges like that before and it can be really difficult to disconnect, even when you're working/studying etc. It sounds like it's affecting her sleeping patterns which could have negative effects on her health. Not to mention that getting high and doing nothing all day doesn't really bode well for her sanity or your relationship. Does she work? You should try getting her out of the house and talking to her about it.
TheContact
Member
Must be nice to have so much free time.
The good news is she will get over it once she beats them, bad news is they can take a good 100 plus hours to fully beat lol
The good news is she will get over it once she beats them, bad news is they can take a good 100 plus hours to fully beat lol
SquiddyCracker
Banned
If there is a "thread of the year"-gaf contest, then this thread is definitely the top contender.
Chairmanchuck
Member
Seems she works at an animal-shelter. While I dont think its bad to get "hooked" on a game, you still should have enough time to clean up your mess or cook. It just seems, from what we read from the OP, that right now directly after work she smokes and starts to play. Then sleeps and repeat.
Thats not really healthy. Though I always wonder why not many people here "attack" her on her drug-use. I mean, weed is okay, but it seems everyday she is stoned and not just smokes a bit.
shanshan310
Member
Ah I see, thanks for that.
Yeah, I don't have a problem with weed generally but I would be pretty concerned if my partner was smoking non-stop outside of work. It doesn't sound like healthy use at all.
MilesWebber
Member
OP,
My ex used to do this with disney movies. He would just SIT and smoke weed and watch disney/animated movies. He did it for two years (and probably still is). he quit his job and it got even worse. It was like a compulsion. Eventually he attempted suicide a couple of times.
Not that that's what's up with your GF but it could be a compulsive thing.
My ex used to do this with disney movies. He would just SIT and smoke weed and watch disney/animated movies. He did it for two years (and probably still is). he quit his job and it got even worse. It was like a compulsion. Eventually he attempted suicide a couple of times.
Not that that's what's up with your GF but it could be a compulsive thing.
Omegasquash
Member
It'll pass, OP. Hell, my wife spent the bulk of a summer playing FFXI and owning the shit out of my progress. She'd just kick it, play the game, and that was that. All night sessions, play -> sleep -> play...whatever.
You said she takes care of her own shit, and this is just something that she's into. Good that she's got a fast fling with a game, but if you're bothered by it just talking to her and letting her know that taking a few weeks off from you leaves you a bit uncomfortable is all.
You said she takes care of her own shit, and this is just something that she's into. Good that she's got a fast fling with a game, but if you're bothered by it just talking to her and letting her know that taking a few weeks off from you leaves you a bit uncomfortable is all.
I hate to break it to you but that's not quite a neogaf original.
shanshan310
Member
Wait, really?
Steve Youngblood
Member
I think it originated on GameFAQs.
Zoe
Member
Actually it is.
Well now I just don't know what to believe.
edit: I take it back I guess. YOLO, Muppet345, YOLO. http://ffxiii360.ytmnd.com/
edit: I take it back I guess. YOLO, Muppet345, YOLO. http://ffxiii360.ytmnd.com/
malingenie
Member
This might come across a little long-winded, but the topic is something I had to deal with about a couple of years ago and probably shouldn't be taken lightly if you felt the need to post about it here.
I had a girlfriend that was into games. She played Halo, CoD, Uncharted and Final Fantasy XI with me, all in moderation while we did the usual healthy relationship stuff like spending quality time together, watching TV shows like The Sopranos, going out, etc. She even played through my copy of FFXIII knowing I was a fan of the series, but disliked the game too much to play it myself. It was like being in a dream at first, thinking I was the luckiest guy in the world.
Then she suddenly lost interest in games, with the exception of FFXI. It became an unhealthy obsession for her as she got caught up in the endless grind that is end game content. She would play it for 8, 12, sometimes 24 hours straight. Entire weekends disappeared in front of the game. Hygiene, food, even visits we had by friends and family were treated as annoying distractions she didn't want to deal with. A poor, little kitten she had begged me to adopt was being neglected by her now, too, but hey, she seemed happy, so who was I to complain, right?
I had put countless hours into FFXI myself, known by virtually everyone on our server at the time, so I was navigating a tricky course. I wanted to spend time with her away from the game, Friday or Saturday nights if nothing else, but trying to communicate that to her always put her on the defensive. There would be days where she let up and it looked like the ship had steered itself back on track, days that I treasured every second of, but they were few and far between. When I thought things couldn't get any worse, she switched from FFXI to WoW...
Our relationship was clearly suffering at that point and it felt like I was the only one who cared. She had become a completely different person than the one I had come to know. I don't remember how long it went on for exactly, at least a few months, but it came to a point where she was trying to quit smoking, couldn't resist the urge anymore and asked me to go buy her a pack because she didn't want to leave the game. I refused unless she came with me, an attempt to spend a little time together away from the game. She blew up and we both wound up yelling at each other, so I went for a long walk to cool myself down and think. When I got back home I found out my mom had been by and the two of them had, to my surprise, gotten physical with one another (still having a hard time believing that ever happened). Cops were called and my girlfriend panicked, so she quickly got a friend to pick her up. Realizing the mess she had gotten herself into, she checked herself into a place that helped her deal with online addiction.
Long story short, if you love her be careful not to let your girl fall into a similar trap. I'd suggest following Septimius' sound advice. Playing her heart out in Fallout for a few weeks might just be harmless fun if she's respecting her work schedule and not completely ignoring you, but I'd start to get worried if it goes beyond that.
As Final Fantasy XI reminds everyone:
I need closure... is she better now?
kurisu_1974
Banned
Karak
Member
My wife will get pretty into a game for weeks at a time. Maybe 1-5 times a year. I just let her, knowing that I do the same thing but at a higher rate. I just make sure to change the times we normally discuss things like move it to the morning or other times. Eat together, and frankly discuss the game because that lets me know what she enjoys.
Zoe
Member
You're not the person OP wrote about.
kurisu_1974
Banned
Labombadog
Member
Get her an Oculus Rift.
Okay, in all seriousness. That must be really tough OP. I haven't really kept up with this thread but have you talked to your significant other on how you feel? Has she always had an addictive personality? And wait, you have sex with her while she was playing Fallout? Man, what the fuck.
Great read. I hope she got better.
Holy shit! :O
Okay, in all seriousness. That must be really tough OP. I haven't really kept up with this thread but have you talked to your significant other on how you feel? Has she always had an addictive personality? And wait, you have sex with her while she was playing Fallout? Man, what the fuck.
This might come across a little long-winded, but the topic is something I had to deal with about a couple of years ago and probably shouldn't be taken lightly if you felt the need to post about it here.
I had a girlfriend that was into games. She played Halo, CoD, Uncharted and Final Fantasy XI with me, all in moderation while we did the usual healthy relationship stuff like spending quality time together, watching TV shows like The Sopranos, going out, etc. She even played through my copy of FFXIII knowing I was a fan of the series, but disliked the game too much to play it myself. It was like being in a dream at first, thinking I was the luckiest guy in the world.
Then she suddenly lost interest in games, with the exception of FFXI. It became an unhealthy obsession for her as she got caught up in the endless grind that is end game content. She would play it for 8, 12, sometimes 24 hours straight. Entire weekends disappeared in front of the game. Hygiene, food, even visits we had by friends and family were treated as annoying distractions she didn't want to deal with. A poor, little kitten she had begged me to adopt was being neglected by her now, too, but hey, she seemed happy, so who was I to complain, right?
I had put countless hours into FFXI myself, known by virtually everyone on our server at the time, so I was navigating a tricky course. I wanted to spend time with her away from the game, Friday or Saturday nights if nothing else, but trying to communicate that to her always put her on the defensive. There would be days where she let up and it looked like the ship had steered itself back on track, days that I treasured every second of, but they were few and far between. When I thought things couldn't get any worse, she switched from FFXI to WoW...
Our relationship was clearly suffering at that point and it felt like I was the only one who cared. She had become a completely different person than the one I had come to know. I don't remember how long it went on for exactly, at least a few months, but it came to a point where she was trying to quit smoking, couldn't resist the urge anymore and asked me to go buy her a pack because she didn't want to leave the game. I refused unless she came with me, an attempt to spend a little time together away from the game. She blew up and we both wound up yelling at each other, so I went for a long walk to cool myself down and think. When I got back home I found out my mom had been by and the two of them had, to my surprise, gotten physical with one another (still having a hard time believing that ever happened). Cops were called and my girlfriend panicked, so she quickly got a friend to pick her up. Realizing the mess she had gotten herself into, she checked herself into a place that helped her deal with online addiction.
Long story short, if you love her be careful not to let your girl fall into a similar trap. I'd suggest following Septimius' sound advice. Playing her heart out in Fallout for a few weeks might just be harmless fun if she's respecting her work schedule and not completely ignoring you, but I'd start to get worried if it goes beyond that.
As Final Fantasy XI reminds everyone:
Great read. I hope she got better.
Holy shit! :O
Northeastmonk
Gold Member
What I couldn't stand was when someone commented like I was addicted. I like long play sessions, but even though they're long I take breaks to check up on important stuff. Like during an 8 or more hour session I'll pause it and go see how everybody is doing or I'll help around the place. It's easy to do and you can just hop back into the game when you're done.
I've never seen sharing that hobby as something desirable. I think a couple needs to have their own interest and hobbies so they can have time away from each other. Give themselves a chance to miss one another. I'd never date a girl that played videogames as much as I do. And I don't play THAT often.
shanshan310
Member
Huh?
People can have more than one hobby. My partner and I often play, but we aren't always into the same games so we aren't always doing it together. I don't see how it would be a negative, having stuff in common is important too
Omegasquash
Member
Shared hobbies != everything you do. For example, my wife and I like to play chess together, but that's not all that we do. Playing games together as just one thing can be fun, just as other things are. It's OK to share a hobby...hell it's OK to share everything. When it grates is when it becomes a relationship issue, I figure.
kurisu_1974
Banned
Not the weed or the games are the problem, but the person.
People can have more than one hobby. My partner and I often play, but we aren't always into the same games so we aren't always doing it together. I don't see how it would be a negative, having stuff in common is important too
I'd rather share a different hobby personally. With the games I play, it gets rather hard to do it "together". It'd be a situation where one is watching the other play. Lots of waiting, lots of sharing. If I'm going to share a hobby I want something more active.
Like glass blowing.
Strangely enough that is a common hobby my GF and I share. She is not a gamer.
Joe T.
Member
Yes, she's back in school, has bi-monthly visits from her son, takes great care of her cats, does a little charity work, hangs out with friends and all while subscribed to Final Fantasy XIV, which she doesn't play very often. I'm proud of her.
teruterubozu
Member
Only on GAF where being stoned and playing video games causes so much drama.
Apparently it is (?). I thought it was a gamefaqs reference but I seem to be wrong
Steve Youngblood
Member
I guess that's just a common misconception. At one point, I could have sworn that someone linked a version of that post pre-dating Muppet's, but I couldn't find such a post. I guess GAF was the origin of that meme. Truly a feather in our cap.
Mattlikewhoa
Member
OP I hope you sort this out with your girl. Keep your head up, and keep trying...
I'm glad to hear this...
I'm glad to hear this...
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