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Welcome to the Legends' House review and gifs. I'm Sunflower. Let's go.
We follow Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Roddy Piper, Tony Atlas, Gene Okerlund, Pat Patterson, Howard Finkel, Hillbilly Jim, and Jimmy Hart as they deal with each other.
This episode starts out with the standard, cookie-cutter reality template of all the Legends showing up at the house and reuniting with each other.
We begin with Tony Atlas who is first in the house. His arms are still really large. That's really all he still has. He's wearing a Triple H shirt, which is kind of the weird start to everyones' wardrobe. More on this later. Running pants and a Triple H shirt as well as a fanny pack. Glad to see he's still living up to the wrestler stereotype.
Each of their beds have a portrait of them in their prime above it. I'm sure someone will be crying over them later as times have changed. Tony browses the kitchen and living room and sees everyones' photos.
Hillbilly Jim shows up next, and he is easily the best looking and most with-it of the entire bunch. I had the good fortune of listening to him on Art of Wrestling by Colt Cabana a ways back, and he's got a good outlook on life, and it shows. I like Hillbilly Jim. He tells Tony they're going to have a hootenanny.
Pat Patterson is next up showing up at the house, and he's also doing pretty well. Not much different than his "Stooge" run in the Attitude Era. He talks about being the first Intercontinental Champion and how he created the Royal Rumble. I think everyone in the house reveres and respects Patterson. Hillbilly Jim talks a lot about how Patterson mentored him, and they demand that he cooks later. Apparently he's a heck of a chef.
Jimmy Hart enters, and man, you really forget that his timeless look is almost ALL his hair and clothing. Underneath...it's a little different. He's obviously still extremely country and sheltered, he's pretty weird. It's one thing to be Hillbilly, but it's another to be Jimmy Hart who is just...weird, man.
Finkel arrives and it looking really heavy. Fortunately, since these recordings, he's dropped a lot of weight and I feel good that he did it, because he's a monster in this show. Very glad he dropped the weight, or most of it.
Hacksaw Jim is in, and his hair is deplorable, but it appears to be well grounded still and reasonable. Hacksaw is concerned because he may not get along with all the members, especially Tony Atlas. We'll see what happens.
According to Jimmy Hart, the restroom is connected a bedroom, so people will get woken up in the mornings or who knows when with their crazy schedules.
Okerlund shows up, and I won't lie, I'm a little sad at how he's aging. It's still weird seeing him in situations where he isn't a consummate professional...I dunno.
Piper is the last in and looks like he isn't enthused in the least about being here. According to what I've read, he is a pretty private guy outside of the business, so this is a weird opening. He's aged really well, however, which is good. The rest of the housemates are dreading his appearance. He talks a lot about how he's not like the others and how he's complicated and an outcast of the bunch.
Jimmy shows Piper around. It's kind of weird, Hart keeps talking about the concerns about the bathroom. Something tells me he's...a mess in there. Something like that. You do see Piper put on sneakers without socks. Those shoes are gonna STINK.
We're introduced to Ashley, who immediately gets Gene's attention. Little pervert. She calls everyone to the living room, and she tells the group that they need to meet their neighbors. Everyone is split up into teams of two and off to meet different neighbors. Hillbilly Jim is wearing an old-ass Wrestlemania shirt with the collar cut out to show off his traps. It's ridiculous.
Jimmy Hart doesn't like Ashley at all. He calls her a..I think he said a tramp or whore. A little venom out of Hart here.
Patterson and Finkel go to a home, and the employees there (good lord) answer and don't speak English. Finkel knows some Spanish, however, and asks to meet people - and gets denied. So they go home.
Atlas and Okerlund meet up with an older white dork and are being invited inside for coffee and brownies. Not bad.
Piper and Hacksaw get a nice home with real humans inside. Dog, kids, parents, and they're all friendly. This is a nice change. Hacksaw and Piper rib each other a little while they're there, trying to impress this crowd of 5 people. Piper has a sad little WWE All-Stars shirt. A little kid tells Piper that Hacksaw says he's stronger than Piper. So it's time to get stupid. One of the children feed Piper a dog treat, real nice you little shit.
Hart and Hacksaw end up at a home with an American flag outside. Hart really loves the American flag out there. They're invited in, the woman who owns the house offers to send them off with some cilantro, and Hart has no frigging idea what cilantro is. Ridiculous.
We check back in with Atlas and Okerlund and apparently Tony Atlas has eaten all of the brownies ever. He's going to be so sick later.
Okerlund calls it quits before Atlas eats everything, and everyone returns home. Piper decides it's time to make a protein shake and has issues with the blender. A LOT of issues with the blender. Hacksaw tries to help and all it does is upset Piper more. Eventually they figure it out.
Patterson and Hart are sent to the grocery store. Patterson sexually harasses the employee by asking him if he likes to play with meat. They're apparently going to make stuffed cabbage whatsits, and Patterson is upset about the small cabbages. Hart gets on a disabled-person cart and shops.
Everyone at home helps out making the food. Patterson is upset at how late they got started making his precious cabbage rolls. While they work on the food, Piper, Hart, Hillbilly and Finkel decide to play tennis, which can't be any good. And it isn't. It's not even a game. Piper sucks at it and nobody cares, really. Then Hart starts talking shit about Fink's weight.
Game's over. Thank god. Atlas helps Patterson with his sore legs. Everyone complains about the cabbage rolls not being ready. More complaints. They're hungry. Piper makes a shitty peanut butter english muffin and looks sad about it.
Okerlund says that it's time for everyone to drink, but then we cut to the next morning for some reason. Hillbilly and Hart are playing guitar together, then someone hits a gong outside. Nobody knows what this means, so they all pad out to the back lawn to find out who hit the gong. Okerlund says it may be Mr. Fuji but it's...Gary Busey. Who is going to give them all a speech and have breakfast. They all sit down on their mats. Patterson has no clue who Busey is.
Busey talks some insane shit, as he always does, and everyone else really...enjoys it. It's really weird to see people not know who he is. He keeps bringing up his role in Lethal Weapon, of all his different movies, he chose this one to talk about. Okerlund is upset about crossing his legs. Hillbilly really enjoyed the serenity. Hacksaw doesn't keep his eyes shut. He's not playing along!
Tony Atlas is completely enamored with him. "One minute he's talking like a college professor, one minute he's talking like one flew over the cuckoo's nest."
Busey talks some stupid shit to worm his way into Atlas' heart.
Atlas loves it. Patterson says he's "Talking all about the ga-ga" which is some baby dialect. Busey keeps saying weird shit. He asks everyone what they like doing. Patterson says he loves singing and taking cruises. Atlas says he likes to help kids, and Hacksaw has a problem with this and says he should spend time with his own family. This is so stupid to talk about or interject. Let the goddamn man talk about the goddamn kids. Don't pretend he's wrong, Hacksaw! So stupid. Hacksaw even says "Don't talk to me about charity stuff, I do enough charity stuff" which is just not good to hear. Busey thankfully shuts them all up, and talks to them about playing characters and how they can't let go of it. This is a touchy subject, and Roddy talks some REAL SHIT about how it is for him out there. How he can't let go of his character because people don't let him.
He brings up how he has "lots of demons" and "is a hardcore guy" (or was) but I don't think he should get in a pissing match with Busey about drugs.
It's time to drink. Patterson gives us a toast to get us started.
Everyone starts drinking, talking about Wrestlemania because they have to, then drink some more. Piper doesn't - he says he's been clean since 2009 - but this is shortly after that (I believe it was taped in 2010) so he was JUST doing his best to stay away from all drugs and alcohol. So, it's kind of shitty that he's being ignored and left alone while everyone else drinks. He obviously doesn't trust himself so much and feels like it's a heck of a test, and I won't disagree. Good on Piper for getting his shit together. He took a walk, came back, and Hacksaw talked to him and they began to bond.
That's the end of the episode.
