Bogan terror on the train this evening. I need to get it off my chest.
Woman screaming on her mobile at her de facto, Brad, who was minding the kids, and who was too fucken drunk on rum to come to the train station to pick her up. She spent a good ten minutes telling Brad what a fucken waste of time he was, and that when her baby came she was going to hook up with some other dude and leave him with the kids. He can keep the house, it's a fucken wreck anyway. Then a chat with her bogan friend about how she'd come within an inch of knocking some fucken stupid chick's head off for lookin' funny at her sister. Nobody fucken looks funny at her sister. Then something about being outed as a lesbian in front of childcare workers.
I was losing my mind. Train was too packed to move.
Security guards come down and, as they do, look from side to side. It's their job.
When they are about five metres past her, she screams "PERVIN ON MY FUCKEN LEGS, YA CUNT".
Security guard turns and says "what ?"
"DON'T PERVE ON MY FUCKEN LEGS YA DEAF CUNT"
Security guard explains that he did nothing of the sort, and was mostly looking for people making a mess, making too much noise, drinking alcohol or anything else.
"I'M PREGNANT YA FUCKEN RETARD. WHY WOULD I BE DRINKIN"
