Fans will be dissecting this episode and that final scene. What do you think drove Chuck to do it? How much of it do you attribute to his unceremonious removal from HHM Howard was willing to pay him out personally just to have him gone versus something in that final conversation with Jimmy, versus a weary realization that the struggle to defeat this illness is too overwhelming, even though he was making progress?
I think that the events outside of his physical discomfort sometimes it feels like the whole world is ganging up on you, and if youre a person who has not done a lot of introspection, if youre a person who has never really felt like he was in the wrong about anything, then it can really seem like the world is giving you the middle finger, and this is maybe one thing to do about it. But I dont think it is the worlds most conscious suicide, frankly.
I rarely had to ask for anything in the entire three seasons because things are so clear. Ive had to ask very, very few questions, and I didnt question this terribly much. Well, the only thing I really wanted them to do was to have the pill bottles in the picture occasionally, because in the last meeting I have with Dr. Cruz [Clea DuVall] the last meeting on camera anyway she talks about the medication, and we never saw it. So I said, Look, if you want to see me in the bed feeling the discomfort, lets see the pill bottles. And in the last moments, I wanted to see an empty pill bottle there.
I think that this is a man who had everything until two years ago or three years ago, and has seen it slip away, and he couldnt really understand what was going on or why it was happening to him why it was happening to the guy who follows all the rules. That was always one of his great conflicts with Jimmy is that Jimmy, who just sneered at the rules, seemed to be thriving or at least he seemed to have a lot of people who thought he was great. I had people who would put it on paper that I was great because Chuck was a very good lawyer, but its not the same as having people really love you and trust you, and be patient with you, and believe in you. I dont think that Chuck has ever demanded all that much patience from anyone. I thought that he carried out his duties as a lawyer with some real dispatch.
If you go back to Jimmys relationship with the parents, and Chucks relationship with the parents, you get to the core of a lot of it. A lot of it is spoken, very much more is not spoken. I always felt it. I always understood it. Bob and I talked about it a lot, And I thought it was a real relationship that we created. It was a real, interesting and understandable, adversarial relationship. So when one domino began to fall, all bets were off then, if I can mix a metaphor beyond recognition. [Laughs.] But the conflicts with HHM there is something about [Howard saying], Not only are we paying you off to get out of our hair, Im going into my own pocket to do it. There is something about the personal side of that. My business life, my law life, that is choking into nothing, and its being done intentionally, and its being done with sacrifice. So its not just people are saying goodbye to me; theyre going out of their way to say goodbye to me.
But I wanted the pills there to show that maybe it was one of those situations where he was saying, Look, one pill used to do this, Im not even due to take another one for another four hours, but Im going to double up in an hour. And its that way the pills that make you flatline, it takes your anxiety away and also adds something to a certain kind of personality. I dont pretend to know what people who abuse drugs and wind up dead go through. There are thousands and thousands of different reasons those things happen, but I wanted to construct something in Chuck that made sense, and that last little blip of energy that is somewhere in that house that was the itch that he couldnt scratch. I think in his last moments he was thinking, Okay, well if this is the way its going to go, this is the way its going to go. Im fine with this.
Not to put too fine of a point on it; its a TV show. Im not a suicidal person. Ive been depressed. Ive had terrible things happen in my life but Ive never had a terminal illness, which I would think would be one of the things that would make suicide a logical step. But to at least have a sketch of what Chuck is going through, and to really examine that I wanted to make it as real as possible and I wanted to make it as believable as possible. Also, Ive played some awful characters, but Ive never had no sympathy for those characters. Ive always understood them on some level. I dont have to accept their values. Their values dont have to be my values. I just have to understand them. Last year [in the play Father Comes Home From the Wars], I played a terrible, terrible, racist Civil War colonel just one of the most despicable people on the face of the Earth who said terrible, terrible things, but with the director Jo Bonney, I was able to find a handle that I could hold. Again, no approval there, but you have to find the sympathy for the person youre playing, no matter how despicable his acts are.