So, seeing how I got unabnned on Good Friday, and how I came to Christ during an Easter, I decided to shar my testimony.
I was never religious growing up. My mom tooked me to church with her on Sundays when I was a kid, but it never took. Eventually, my mother stopped going to church and I never really expressed an interest in going. I don't think I was an atheist, or even agnostic, God was just not something I ever thought of.
So, what had happened is that I got engaged, with the first person I ever fell in love with. Which means, I might not have been thinking things through very clearly. Well, that ended badly and I was pretty much devastated. I had forsaken my friends and my family for this girl, and now I had nothing. Well, at the time it felt like nothing. So for some odd reason, I thought that church might provide me some answers. So I decided to go to this church I used to see on the side of the road I used to pass on my way to the mall. So I decided to drop by one Sunday.
It was kind of terrifying at first, the church was filled with people I went to college with. Ones that I had clashes with and knew me as the kid who drank in class and wore nail polish. So it definitely took me a while to get comfortable in there. in fact, I used to just sit in the back and leave as quickly as possible after the sermon was over. Eventually, I started going to more and more additonal functions and it sort of felt like I found a home there.
So Easter of 2004, I went to Easter service, which I normally avoided because I knew it was a communion service. And as they went up and down the rows handing out the wafers and that horrible sweet wine, I had to make a gutcheck of whether or not I was really ready to give myself to Christ. And as I took communion, I realized I had made the correct decision. I was baptized 3 months later.
In 2008, I suffered a crisis of faith in many ways, my work at the time really brought me in touch with alot of people who identified as Christians, but were the most hateful people I had ever encountered. And it just started to weigh heavily on me, on the Christ I had given myself to, and the Christ that was being presented to me. Even going back to my home church that summer, really disheartened me. I felt so lost. Eventually, I just stopped going to church at all. It definitely felt like the Christ I had loved and whose teaching that I thought I understood were the antithesis of what the majority of Christians seemed to follow.
But, yesterday, I decided to drop by a random church and attend Easter services. It felt very good to worship with others again. I didn't stay after the service for fellowship, but i definitely felt the 'Prodigal Son" vibe coursing through me.
And it seems like a repeat of what has gone on with my walk with Christ. Everytime I have felt lost, or alone, God has opened a door for me. Sometimes, its obvious to me, sometimes, God has to give me a kick in the ass to go towards it. But, I may be ready to come home.
Anyway, just felt like sharing.