I would disagree with gketter. I read Final Crisis the first time after only reading some Batman stuff from DC and I enjoyed it. Sure, it was a whole lot to take in and I was pretty confused, but I picked up on what was going on and who people were enough to really enjoy the story.
You ought to watch the Grant Morrison documentary,
Talking With Gods. It's so great.
Lol. I know you're mostly joking, but real talk, it's super uncomfortable to read an omnibus in a bed. I've tried multiple positions and none of them allow for a pleasurable omnibus reading experience.
Don't feel bad. There are plenty of people who don't like Final Crisis. I can definitely see it as an "it's not for everyone" sort of book. And like PsychBat said, that isn't DC in general, that's just Morrison (and not even all Morrison stuff is like that).
But feel free to post the reasons why you dislike it!