drunk thread again

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Cross posting

Lol all wildlife in the lake forever killed.

Edit: I'm actually sober here. My Ray Charles ventriloquist impression.

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I have sunglasses like that I wear occasionally. I think they were my moms from like the 80s or something.


Going to my cousins graduation party in a bit. Gonna bring him a little bottle of makers mark and the first volume of the hawkeye comic/trade paper back thing.
 
I wish I could put manny and coldvein in a soft serve machine, press swirl, and eat resulting ice cream out of a cake cone made of acridmeat and tashbrooke's semen.
 
That feeling when you don't know if you should post in the drunk thread or the depression one..?

A two week of being drunk every other day, you just feel sick, I hope I saved up enough to take a couple of white months
 
Also, you should apologize for using that word. This is drunk thread but we're not animals. Have some fucking class.
 
I'm hanging out with teens all night.
It's my cousins graduation party and he's going into the service so I'm hanging out with all them teens.
 
I just awoke into my mind from a dream. Fell asleep to music for a moment then bam. Let's try this again after a few hits.
 
I just don't think jesus is gonna allow me to have sexual relations with her.
You gotta distract Jesus to get to that. Sacrifice a lamb then bang her while he's not looking.

I got assaulted by a bug. It somehow landed on my collar then crawled down my body and I couldn't find it. It's a gross fucking bug and I freaked out. I changed clothes but I still feel like it's crawling around in my bed. I can't sleep now with all these gross bugs touchin me .
 
sup guys. my leg fucking hurts from basketball, but on the bright side, last weekend a girl sucked my dick.

too bad she was only 17, and had never sucked a dick before. so it sucked.
 
I just don't think jesus is gonna allow me to have sexual relations with her.

Listen. Like 90% of the time, that Jesus shit is a front. Bad bitches hide behind jesus ALL. THE. TIME. It's just an excuse for them not fucking guys they don't want to fuck anyway.
 
Have you guys seen Bill Burrs special on Netflix? (Called You People Are All The Same)

That shit had me in stitches.
 
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