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[The Hermit]

New girl

I know... but damn, the other was just so perfect

Unfortunately I am currently studying for a very hard exam, so I am barely going out... I think I should go out more, drink more on the weekends. know more people, who knows...

 

[reilo]

I know... but damn, the other was just so perfect

Unfortunately I am currently studying for a very hard exam, so I am barely going out... I think I should go out more, drink more on the weekends. know more people, who knows...

How can she be so perfect if she's not willing to give you the time of day?

 

[Eggo]

Spectre,

Your situation is reminiscent of one I was in. A female neighbor in my apartment complex was studying for her PHD at UCLA. She met a guy through online dating, things didn't work out, but they ended up becoming very good friends. They were inseparable BFF's and she always talked about him, not because she liked him but because they spent so much time together. His name is sure to come up if you have an extended conversation due to association/amount of time she spends in his company.

After a few years, she finished her schoolwork and recently moved to the east coast for a job. She knew it was a temporary situation, and I think that's a big reason why she didn't spend much time dating others. As for his deal, I suspect he had no game and wanted to be with her, but settled for being the emotional sponge and nice guy who helped her out all the time. She didn't have a car, and he drove her everywhere, always helped her with things, brought her soup when she was sick kind of deal.

I didn't actually spend much time talking to him, so I may be misinterpreting the situation. Maybe he's just a genuinely super nice guy who wants to help people out all the time and was completely happy being platonic friends. I'm 90% sure she wanted and had a platonic relationship with him, although she did spend the night at his place quite a bit. I talked to her as she was leaving and asked "Are you guys really just 'friends?'" and she said, "Yes, but nobody believes me." I believe her. I get the vibe that she wanted nothing more, and he appeared to be OK with not having sex with her, even though they had earlier in their relationship.

Like your situation, I got a weird jealousy vibe from him. Like I'd invite her out to group events with other friends, and she would say, "I can't. He wants me to stay in to work on this paper for school." So he'd often be the party pooper, and he was anti-social himself, so if she hung out with him, I wouldn't see them whenever I organized a night out with friends. All in all, it was a strange relationship they had, but I got a strong vibe from her that she viewed him as just a friend. As she was leaving, I said something like "I wouldn't do all the stuff he does with you if we weren't having sex" and she gave me this surprised look. I think guys and girls are just wired differently.

 

[Rikkun]

Spectre,

Your situation is reminiscent of one I was in. A female neighbor in my apartment complex was studying for her PHD at UCLA. She met a guy through online dating, things didn't work out, but they ended up becoming very good friends. They were inseparable BFF's and she always talked about him, not because she liked him but because they spent so much time together. His name is sure to come up if you have an extended conversation due to association/amount of time she spends in his company.

After a few years, she finished her schoolwork and recently moved to the east coast for a job. She knew it was a temporary situation, and I think that's a big reason why she didn't spend much time dating others. As for his deal, I suspect he had no game and wanted to be with her, but settled for being the emotional sponge and nice guy who helped her out all the time. She didn't have a car, and he drove her everywhere, always helped her with things, brought her soup when she was sick kind of deal.

I didn't actually spend much time talking to him, so I may be misinterpreting the situation. Maybe he's just a genuinely super nice guy who wants to help people out all the time and was completely happy being platonic friends. I'm 90% sure she wanted and had a platonic relationship with him, although she did spend the night at his place quite a bit. I talked to her as she was leaving and asked "Are you guys really just 'friends?'" and she said, "Yes, but nobody believes me." I believe her. I get the vibe that she wanted nothing more, and he appeared to be OK with not having sex with her, even though they had earlier in their relationship.

Like your situation, I got a weird jealousy vibe from him. Like I'd invite her out to group events with other friends, and she would say, "I can't. He wants me to stay in to work on this paper for school." So he'd often be the party pooper, and he was anti-social himself, so if she hung out with him, I wouldn't see them whenever I organized a night out with friends. All in all, it was a strange relationship they had, but I got a strong vibe from her that she viewed him as just a friend. As she was leaving, I said something like "I wouldn't do all the stuff he does with you if we weren't having sex" and she gave me this surprised look. I think guys and girls are just wired differently.

This always happens to me. It's not like 'having a reward for being nice', it's more like it would be kind of... strange.

 

[soultron]

I feel it is the only solution to my problem but honestly the whole 'join a club' thing seems utterly silly to me, and i dont even know where to begin. Shit sucks.

Dude, I just started playing intramural sports yesterday and I already met a bunch of girls through that. Just do it.

All you're doing is increasing the number of connections you have. Whether these result in friendships, girlfriends, or nothing, at least you went out and tried. Otherwise, you won't know who or what you missed. The right connections are out there, but if you don't try to find them, they'll pass you by.

It's like how if you want to get a job you go to a conference and network with other professionals. It's the same concept, but just with making friends (guy or girl) and meeting women instead of your career.

 

[SRG01]

I have a bit of an odd question for everyone here, and admittedly it's a bit of a tough question: How do I know when it's time to call it off with a girl?

I'm not sure if it's because the past two weeks coincided with the start of the school semester and leaving us overtired, or if it's something more... but something is definitely different during the past two weeks.

Also, ever since we started dating, she hasn't gone out of her way to show her affection aside from the kisses or holding hands (and perhaps a makeout session too but...). Perhaps it's because she's shy -- she did say that she's rarely proactive and doesn't take the lead much -- but... I guess it's like that song... "Asking for flowers is like asking you to be nice." Is this really something that can be solved by just talking to her?

I feel like a total asshole even considering this, but... isn't it fair to feel wanted in a relationship? Or to put that high on my list?

 

[duk]

u might have to accept that ur just not the priority right now

as long as wen u reach out she responds positively then i wouldn't worry

 

[superfly]

OK here goes.

I seem to have this complex when it comes to girls that I don't think is entirely unusual. Basically girls who seem keen on me are the ones I'm disinterested in, and then I get left chasing the ones I like.

I've dated a new girl, who I like, 4 times, and I decided to tell her on date 3 that I like her. She then explained that her last relationship lasted for 8 years and that she is scared of getting hurt.

So I was like, it's OK no need to rush anything, but I want you to know how I feel. Which I think she respected.

Anyhow, date 4 was really nice, so after dinner we had a walk and it felt like the right moment to kiss. I mean I don't need to race her into bed, but I want to state my attraction.

Unfortunately she declined the kiss claiming that she isn't ready for anything, but she likes me and feels she can talk with me in a way she couldn't with her ex.

So, is this honesty on her part and is it worth me pursuing or is it a roundabout way of her saying thanks, but no thanks?

I'm thinking to not contact her for a bit and see if she comes calling.

What do you reckon?

So after 5 days of silence she messaged me to ask how I am, that she'd been busy etc. Guess the silent treatment worked. So, how do I up the ante from here, bearing in mind how things have gone previous?

 

[SRG01]

u might have to accept that ur just not the priority right now

as long as wen u reach out she responds positively then i wouldn't worry

Yeah, she does respond positively. The thing is that everything is there... just that I don't feel wanted.

edit: I should rephrase that. She wants us to go out on dates -- we even have a tentative date set for this weekend -- so obviously she wants us to spend time together. She says that she has a great time with me. I just don't... feel the signals from her?

 

[Azzurri]

What would you guy's do if you where like 8-9 years older then the girl? I'm 27 and she's about to turn 19. I know we probably don't have much in common, but the time I have spoke with her I felt good, something I hadn't felt for awhile. Anyways, I'd like to ask her out for coffee, but I'm afraid she'll say no due to my age , and I also hate rejection.

 

[SRG01]

What would you guy's do if you where like 8-9 years older then the girl? I'm 27 and she's about to turn 19. I know we probably don't have much in common, but the time I have spoke with her I felt good, something I hadn't felt for awhile. Anyways, I'd like to ask her out for coffee, but I'm afraid she'll say no due to my age , and I also hate rejection.

You'll never know unless you try.

 

[Azzurri]

You'll never know unless you try.

Yea, I know. I plan too, just need the right time.

 

[soundahfekz]

What would you guy's do if you where like 8-9 years older then the girl? I'm 27 and she's about to turn 19. I know we probably don't have much in common, but the time I have spoke with her I felt good, something I hadn't felt for awhile. Anyways, I'd like to ask her out for coffee, but I'm afraid she'll say no due to my age , and I also hate rejection.

8 years is a huge disparity. I have problems getting along with women that are 23-24 because of the maturity difference, and I just turned 27 this month. It's possible, but it's entirely likely you'll come off looking creepy. If there's anything there, I'd let her initiate it or wash my hands from the idea entirely. This is my personal opinion though, so to each his own.

 

[TurboLibre]

I feel like a total asshole even considering this, but... isn't it fair to feel wanted in a relationship? Or to put that high on my list?

What other reason is there to be in one?

 

[3N16MA]

What would you guy's do if you where like 8-9 years older then the girl? I'm 27 and she's about to turn 19. I know we probably don't have much in common, but the time I have spoke with her I felt good, something I hadn't felt for awhile. Anyways, I'd like to ask her out for coffee, but I'm afraid she'll say no due to my age , and I also hate rejection.

Is she in college? If she is that can be a big barrier when one is still in college and the other is already a few years into their career.

 

[SRG01]

What other reason is there to be in one?

Of course. But the bigger question is whether or not talking to her or asking her about it would even work. Like I said, can I really "ask for flowers" in a relationship?

 

[IamMattFox]

edit: I should rephrase that. She wants us to go out on dates -- we even have a tentative date set for this weekend -- so obviously she wants us to spend time together. She says that she has a great time with me. I just don't... feel the signals from her?

I feel like going with your gut in situations like this is the way to go. If you're not feeling it, you're not feeling it. Not her fault or yours, so no need to feel like an asshole.

I wouldn't string her along though. That's when you do become an asshole.

 

[Azzurri]

8 years is a huge disparity. I have problems getting along with women that are 23-24 because of the maturity difference, and I just turned 27 this month. It's possible, but it's entirely likely you'll come off looking creepy. If there's anything there, I'd let her initiate it or wash my hands from the idea entirely. This is my personal opinion though, so to each his own.

I see your point, but I've always gotten along better with younger girls, I don't know why. I did talk to her for a long time and she didn't seem "creeped" out.

Is she in college? If she is that can be a big barrier when one is still in college and the other is already a few years into their career.

I'm finishing too, the thing with me is I work for my self so the career barrier doesn't bother me.

 

[SRG01]

I feel like going with your gut in situations like this is the way to go. If you're not feeling it, you're not feeling it. Not her fault or yours, so no need to feel like an asshole.

I wouldn't string her along though. That's when you do become an asshole.

Yeah, I know. I'm thinking I should give it one more date before I really decide on what to do. I guess I'm feeling guilty about it because I know that she likes me a lot...

edit: In retrospect, my experience with my ex taught me a lot about what I needed in a relationship. I went through a couple of really awful ones -- including my ex -- but the saving grace was that there were some incredibly good moments that showed me what *should* be in a relationship.

 

[soundahfekz]

I see your point, but I've always gotten along better with younger girls, I don't know why. I did talk to her for a long time and she didn't seem "creeped" out.



I'm finishing too, the thing with me is I work for my self so the career barrier doesn't bother me.

This is not really a good thing for you. Maybe you should do an internal assessment as to why that is. at 18-22 women are extremely indecisive and unless you're looking to smash, I'm not sure exactly what you expect to get out of dating her.

 

[TurboLibre]

Of course. But the bigger question is whether or not talking to her or asking her about it would even work. Like I said, can I really "ask for flowers" in a relationship?

It might, it might not. Why call it quits without trying any discussion though? Forget that dumb song, you're not asking for flowers, you're letting her know you don't feel appreciated. And if that is the case you have no reason to stick around.

 

[SRG01]

It might, it might not. Why call it quits without trying any discussion though? Forget that dumb song, you're not asking for flowers, you're letting her know you don't feel appreciated. And if that is the case you have no reason to stick around.

You're right, of course. It's strange, because I actually acted on communication when I was in my younger relationships but kind of grew out of it as I became more cynical with age.

It would be hypothetical of me though; I was extremely pissed at my ex when she kept on telling me why she hardly talked to me anymore when we were still "together", and she kept on telling me she'd tell me why soon...

 

[soundahfekz]

You're right, of course. It's strange, because I actually acted on communication when I was in my younger relationships but kind of grew out of it as I became more cynical with age.

It would be hypothetical of me though; I was extremely pissed at my ex when she kept on telling me why she hardly talked to me anymore when we were still "together", and she kept on telling me she'd tell me why soon...

When you go on dates with her, are you paying all of the time? Just curious.

 

[Rikkun]

When you go on dates with her, are you paying all of the time? Just curious.

dun dun duuuuun

 

[SRG01]

When you go on dates with her, are you paying all of the time? Just curious.

No.

edit: I'm not saying she doesn't show her affection. I'm saying that I'm not getting her signals... or at least as receptive as I should be.

 

[Moussi]

Chillin with a girl im interested in tomorrow. Gonna turn the kino up! Thing is dont wanna come across as a creep. Also i wanna compliment her when i see her whats a good compliment women like to hear but doesnt make me sound like a pathetic needy chump?

 

[Etrian Oddity]

Surprised I forgot to post this earlier.

Kissed a girl for the first time last week. And she went straight to tongue, and we made out for like 5 minutes. Go me.

 

[DualShadow]

Surprised I forgot to post this earlier.

Kissed a girl for the first time last week. And she went straight to tongue, and we made out for like 5 minutes. Go me.

Nice work mate!

Always good to hear a success story.

 

[Danielsan]

So remember when this happened?

Well fuck my life, or at least the place I live.
Just got a chat invite by some cute chick on a dating site, we chat a bit and then she asks me where I live. Turns out we live 2 hours from each other (which is pretty fucking far in The Netherlands), she ask if I have a car, which I don't. At this point I know I'm fucked, and sure enough. She tells me that it's been fun talking but she thinks it's a waste to put in so much energy into something that isn't going to go anywhere anyway. I'm somewhat disappointed, but I agree. She's right after all. Long distance relationships hardly work and are a real hassle. Then she proceeds to tells me that she would have invited to get a drink right now if I hadn't lived so far away and to send her a message if I ever live closer by.
Let me paraphrase my reaction: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!

I just opened a beer. I hardly ever drink at home, but I sure as hell need one now.

You're raging because a girl you don't know lives far away from you?

Just raging because of a missed opportunity. Where I live just doesn't do me any favours. Nothing serious, just had to vent what just happened for a bit.

I wake up today with a message from the lady in question in my mailbox. Turns out she couldn't shake the feeling that I was interesting and has decided to not view things in black & white (the distance thing) so immediately. Gave me her phone number and if things don't go south we'll set up a date some time this week. Kind of laughing my ass off right now. Even if this doesn't work out, it's still great.

 

[Argyle]

Yeah, I know. I'm thinking I should give it one more date before I really decide on what to do. I guess I'm feeling guilty about it because I know that she likes me a lot...

edit: In retrospect, my experience with my ex taught me a lot about what I needed in a relationship. I went through a couple of really awful ones -- including my ex -- but the saving grace was that there were some incredibly good moments that showed me what *should* be in a relationship.

What the fuck is wrong with you? You say in this post that you know she is into you but you're disappointed because...why again? She doesn't show it "enough?" She doesn't "bring you flowers?" The fuck?

Are you that needy and insecure?

If you're not getting enough affection maybe lead by example? Some people are just reserved... Did you sleep with her yet?

 

[SRG01]

What the fuck is wrong with you? You say in this post that you know she is into you but you're disappointed because...why again? She doesn't show it "enough?" She doesn't "bring you flowers?" The fuck?

Are you that needy and insecure?

If you're not getting enough affection maybe lead by example? Some people are just reserved... Did you sleep with her yet?

Woah calm down there buddy. This is a help thread, not for flames. Don't presume things between the lines. So yeah, probably not going to answer this one.

 

[SRG01]

Talked to one of my married friends about this and she had some interesting perspectives on my situation. Instead of just "talking" to her about it, what would be more constructive would be to allow her to take the lead and use positive reinforcement whenever she makes a move. I'm more assertive and dominant, whereas she's more shy and more reliant on me to take the initiative, so this may work well.

 

[Idde]

So remember when this happened?




I wake up today with a message from the lady in question in my mailbox. Turns out she couldn't shake the feeling that I was interesting and has decided to not view things in black & white (the distance thing) so immediately. Gave me her phone number and if things don't go south we'll set up a date some time this week. Kind of laughing my ass off right now. Even if this doesn't work out, it's still great.

You know, two hours seems like a lot for us spoiled Dutchies, but it's really not that much. A friend of mine is (succesfully) dating/having a relationship with someone from Tenessee. For over two years now. If he can do that with the Atlantic in between them, two hours should be ok

Being stuck in a small town sucks though, I agree. Thank God i'm moving to Amsterdam in two weeks. Should be much better

 

[PS3GamerKyle]

Not posting because I have an issue, but damn, since moving into college roughly a month ago, I have found myself just being so much more confident and that has paid off. I've hooked up with so many girls and actually I'm going on a date tonight with this girl I met yesterday.

Yes yes, blah blah college girls are easy, but damn, confidence definitely works. Girls love that shit. Don't act desperate. Not feeling the vibe? Ok, move on. That has been my MO since day one.

 

[Danielsan]

You know, two hours seems like a lot for us spoiled Dutchies, but it's really not that much. A friend of mine is (succesfully) dating/having a relationship with someone from Tenessee. For over two years now. If he can do that with the Atlantic in between them, two hours should be ok

Being stuck in a small town sucks though, I agree. Thank God i'm moving to Amsterdam in two weeks. Should be much better

Damn, that's quite the distance. Awesome that they are able to make it work.
Two hours is definitely not that bad, however it takes two people willing to put in the effort to make it work.

Being stuck in a small town sucks to a certain degree. Where I live does have its luxuries. For instance, I'm addicted to running and the dunes and the beach are only a 5 minute walk away. That said, I can't wait to move to Amsterdam or somewhere near. Just need to get my degree and a decent job before I do. The costs of living in Amsterdam are way too high. I'm barely scraping by living on my own in Den Helder as it is.


Anywho. I've got a date set for tomorrow night.

 

[KrymynalChylde]

Hey dudes!

So here's the situation. While working at a resort in 2010, I met this girl. Long story short, we only started hanging out at the end of the season, but really hit it off. Fooled around a couple times but never slept together (as I said this was at the tail end of the season) I moved back home (toronto) and she came to see some family during the summer where we got to chill again. Had an amazing day together, it was hard to see her go.

We both travel a lot, and are from opposite ends of the country, but we've maintained an email correspondence and even a couple cards/little gifts here and there. Come this winter, I'll be moving back out west to a different resort that's about 3-4 hours away from where she lives.

Now here's my issue, I have a strict code about putting girls on pedestals. I do pretty well with the ladies most of the time, but rarely, if ever, do I feel this strongly about someone. Feeling this way never seems to work in my favour (or most dudes) and I certainly don't want to be seen as this guy who will fall head over heels for her etc...we all know how that ends up. So if all goes according to plan, and I do see her this winter...how do I approach the situation? I know that when we did spend time together she seemed really into me, but as I said earlier we have 2 very different lives and will be heading seperate directions again at the end of the season. But I really, REALLY like this girl and would love to see if there is potential for a future there.
Advice?

 

[SpectreFire]

Spectre,

Your situation is reminiscent of one I was in. A female neighbor in my apartment complex was studying for her PHD at UCLA. She met a guy through online dating, things didn't work out, but they ended up becoming very good friends. They were inseparable BFF's and she always talked about him, not because she liked him but because they spent so much time together. His name is sure to come up if you have an extended conversation due to association/amount of time she spends in his company.

After a few years, she finished her schoolwork and recently moved to the east coast for a job. She knew it was a temporary situation, and I think that's a big reason why she didn't spend much time dating others. As for his deal, I suspect he had no game and wanted to be with her, but settled for being the emotional sponge and nice guy who helped her out all the time. She didn't have a car, and he drove her everywhere, always helped her with things, brought her soup when she was sick kind of deal.

I didn't actually spend much time talking to him, so I may be misinterpreting the situation. Maybe he's just a genuinely super nice guy who wants to help people out all the time and was completely happy being platonic friends. I'm 90% sure she wanted and had a platonic relationship with him, although she did spend the night at his place quite a bit. I talked to her as she was leaving and asked "Are you guys really just 'friends?'" and she said, "Yes, but nobody believes me." I believe her. I get the vibe that she wanted nothing more, and he appeared to be OK with not having sex with her, even though they had earlier in their relationship.

Like your situation, I got a weird jealousy vibe from him. Like I'd invite her out to group events with other friends, and she would say, "I can't. He wants me to stay in to work on this paper for school." So he'd often be the party pooper, and he was anti-social himself, so if she hung out with him, I wouldn't see them whenever I organized a night out with friends. All in all, it was a strange relationship they had, but I got a strong vibe from her that she viewed him as just a friend. As she was leaving, I said something like "I wouldn't do all the stuff he does with you if we weren't having sex" and she gave me this surprised look. I think guys and girls are just wired differently.

I have a feeling that this could possibly be exactly the situation they're in. It definitely sounds familiar enough. What ended up happen to the two after she left?

 

[TurboLibre]

Talked to one of my married friends about this and she had some interesting perspectives on my situation. Instead of just "talking" to her about it, what would be more constructive would be to allow her to take the lead and use positive reinforcement whenever she makes a move. I'm more assertive and dominant, whereas she's more shy and more reliant on me to take the initiative, so this may work well.

Effective communication is always always the right answer. If you want to be passive aggressive go for it but keep in mind you're playing a dangerous game. Honestly though, I feel like you want this to end. Maybe I'm reading into your posts too much, but it sounds like you have a hard time with commitment and are looking for something to break this off. And by approaching the situation this way you're allowing her to be the one that ends it.

I'm probably way off, but that's the general vibe I've been getting off your post history for some reason. Either way, talk to her.

 

[Qwerty710710]

What should put on when you write your okcupid profile?? Because it takes months and months whenever I get a message the time I got one was in December of last year.

 

[~Kinggi~]

What should put on when you write your okcupid profile?? Because it takes months and months whenever I get a message the time I got one was in December of last year.

It wont matter how good it is. You need a hot picture. Keep things short i guess in the profile.

Only time a good profile ever really sells you is when you are a stud and the girl wants to build up her infatuation when messaging.

A bad profile almost always hurts you though. Shit sucks!

 

[SRG01]

Effective communication is always always the right answer. If you want to be passive aggressive go for it but keep in mind you're playing a dangerous game. Honestly though, I feel like you want this to end. Maybe I'm reading into your posts too much, but it sounds like you have a hard time with commitment and are looking for something to break this off. And by approaching the situation this way you're allowing her to be the one that ends it.

I'm probably way off, but that's the general vibe I've been getting off your post history for some reason. Either way, talk to her.

Well, I'm usually great with commitment when I'm with someone, lol. The biggest problem, I guess, is that I haven't been in a "real" relationship in ages because I've been dating constantly on and off for years, with an ex in-between for about six months. The biggest boon -- and perhaps the biggest curse -- I've learnt from all my dating is that I value overt affection over subtle signals. It can't be just words.

I've never really thought about it -- positive reinforcement -- as passive aggressive, so that was a good alternate view. Thanks. I think I will talk to her post-date (we have another one coming up), depending on how it goes. I do admit that I have problems talking to women I date about issues, mainly because I grew up with a totally different value set than most people I know.

 

[NihonTiger90]

It wont matter how good it is. You need a hot picture. Keep things short i guess in the profile.

Only time a good profile ever really sells you is when you are a stud and the girl wants to build up her infatuation when messaging.

A bad profile almost always hurts you though. Shit sucks!

Pretty much. You need your best picture ever to even get a single message. Sadly, I've been told I look good in person, but I'm not photogenic, so that's always a problem for me.

 

[Argyle]

Woah calm down there buddy. This is a help thread, not for flames. Don't presume things between the lines. So yeah, probably not going to answer this one.

Just giving you some tough love, that's all. If you want to take relationship advice from tkawsome (who iirc has never been in a relationship) because it's not as confrontational, be my guest.

My point is that you sound like the girl in this relationship, whether you want to admit it or not.

 

[SRG01]

Just giving you some tough love, that's all. If you want to take relationship advice from tkawsome (who iirc has never been in a relationship) because it's not as confrontational, be my guest.

My point is that you sound like the girl in this relationship, whether you want to admit it or not.

Then post something constructive, like most people have done in this thread.

 

[SRG01]

Now here's my issue, I have a strict code about putting girls on pedestals. I do pretty well with the ladies most of the time, but rarely, if ever, do I feel this strongly about someone. Feeling this way never seems to work in my favour (or most dudes) and I certainly don't want to be seen as this guy who will fall head over heels for her etc...we all know how that ends up. So if all goes according to plan, and I do see her this winter...how do I approach the situation? I know that when we did spend time together she seemed really into me, but as I said earlier we have 2 very different lives and will be heading seperate directions again at the end of the season. But I really, REALLY like this girl and would love to see if there is potential for a future there.
Advice?

Sorry I missed this earlier. My suggestion would be to give it a shot and play it by ear once you see her again. If you're into long-distance relationships, then by all means try it out. I've known a bunch of people who swore to never do LD, but ended up having great ones over time (especially with grad school).

 

[TurboLibre]

Just giving you some tough love, that's all. If you want to take relationship advice from tkawsome (who iirc has never been in a relationship) because it's not as confrontational, be my guest.

My point is that you sound like the girl in this relationship, whether you want to admit it or not.

It doesn't matter if I haven't been in a relationship, this is common sense. And my suggestion is more confrontational than his idea. I'm not sure what you're going on about.

 

[Atramental]

So I'm a Junior in college and I still haven't had a relationship of any kind. That's kind of sad, right?

Then again it doesn't help that I:
-Wasted two years of college at Bob Jones Uni.
-Live at home
-Work part time at a web design firm
-Have no hair on my head
-Probably have some sort of social anxiety disorder
-And have design projects to work on all of the time

So, I guess what I really want to ask is that once I get out of college does my "selection" of possible mates, who are at least somewhat decent, decrease sharply?

 

[DualShadow]

They are just "harder" to meet.

 

[Hypnotoad]

Is she in college? If she is that can be a big barrier when one is still in college and the other is already a few years into their career.

Yes, she is in College (they all are around here). I work, but not a career or anything, still attending classes in spare time myself. I get around good with girls around 20, and I have never seen "creppy" in relationships with such an age difference. Just want to get some input from people who have been in it before.

 

[ecurbj]

Yes. The older you get the selection decreases. The bar/clubs is your only hope or mutual, social networking with other friends at that point.

I'm in the same situation your in. I practically wasted my whole high school and college career because of social anxiety and my strict religious background. I'm 24, so I still have time but what's left of college, bars & clubs and social networking is my only help. Don't know if those online dating sites are help though...