Okay, so this was a bit of a saga. I used the linux USB boot guide found in the comment section of this:
https://www.reddit.com/r/vitahacks/comments/6nwtkj/setting_up_your_gamecard_to_microsd_adapter/
It works. Pretty painless, just takes a bit of time.
I had issues, however, getting it to work with enso and henkaku started fucking up and throwing errors when i tried to install. Couldn't find a way out of the loop of henkaku throwing an error and not being able to use vitashell to remove the potential problem children. Formatted ur0 and the memory card. Rebuilt database. Now it's working, installed enso and moved it to ur0 with vita and molecular shell before even touching the adapter. Now it's working perfectly. I always swapped from the plugin used in that guide to this one:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0BzcqzW6QWZzzLTItUzB3dDZ3OE0/view?pageId=106113694444743551139
which mounts the memory card in uma0, which reduces issues with transfering files and such. This is all working for me now. goodluck.
I bought one from this account on ebay:
http://www.ebay.com/usr/ps_freedom?_trksid=p2047675.l2559
like i said before, I really don't think you're going to find many duds. It's literally just a pcb with a microSD slot soldered in. Any monkey who can figure out ordering a pcb and has the hardware can make one that's perfectly serviceable.