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Hitchhiker's Guide movie review from hardcore fan: uh-oh.

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P

Prospero

Member
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The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy movie is bad. Really bad. You just won't believe how vastly, staggeringly, jaw-droppingly bad it is. I mean, you might think that The Phantom Menace was a hopelessly misguided attempt to reinvent a much-loved franchise by people who, though well-intentioned, completely failed to understand what made the original popular - but that's just peanuts to the Hitchhiker's movie.
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The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy movie is an abomination. Whereas the radio show, TV show, books and computer game are all recognisably variations on a theme, this is something new and almost entirely unrelated. It’s not even a good film if viewed as an original work: the characters are unsympathetic, the cast exhibit no chemistry, the direction is pedestrian, the pace plodding, the special effects overpowering (lots and lots of special effects, none of them funny mind you) and above all the script is amazingly, mindbogglingly awful. Oh, and they have taken most of the jokes out.
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His hardcoreness might be influencing his opinion, but this review is nonetheless cause for concern.
 
W

whytemyke

Honorary Canadian.
C'mon guys.... Mos Def will pull through!!! He's got enough acting experience to put this movie on his shoulders and carry it! he's black on both sides, remember? he's got this shit on lockdown.

I hope sam rockwell has a larger role than the trailer made it seem.
 
F

FnordChan

Member
Really hardcore fanboys are the pickiest fuckers in the galaxy. It may suck just as much as he says, but I'll wait until someone less slavishly devoted to the series comments.

FnordChan
 
M

mattx5

Member
Well his isn't the first review we've had. Earlier reviews of unfinished cuts of the film have said that it was excellent, so......

Who do you trust?
 
A

Ash Housewares

The Mountain Jew
mattx5 said:
Well his isn't the first review we've had. Earlier reviews of unfinished cuts of the film have said that it was excellent, so......

Who do you trust?
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There's only two men I trust, one's me and the other's not you
 
F

Fresh Prince

Banned
whytemyke said:
C'mon guys.... Mos Def will pull through!!! He's got enough acting experience to put this movie on his shoulders and carry it! he's black on both sides, remember? he's got this shit on lockdown.

I hope sam rockwell has a larger role than the trailer made it seem.
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You know what will pull this movie through a Will Smith like song about the exploits of Ford Prefect ala MIB.
 
W

whytemyke

Honorary Canadian.
Fresh Prince said:
You know what will pull this movie through a Will Smith like song about the exploits of Ford Prefect ala MIB.
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Uh-
Uh-
Yeah
the F O R Ds
F O R Ds
The bad guys here are whack- remember that
for when you see alien mos def in close contact


i give up.
 
F

FoneBone

Member
Um... this is hardly the first review of the movie, and pretty much all the others have been quite positive. I wouldn't worry.
 
M

miyuru

Member
Flynn said:
Look at this guy's resume, he's probably pissed because he wasn't asked to write the script.
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:lol No wonder!! He's probably getting mad that he was only called a 'hardcore fan' in the thread title :lol
 
L

Lord Error

Insane For Sony
I was always concerned this movie just might turn unfunny. Many situations found in the books are not that funny if you just look at them - the funny part is how the writer describes them. How are you going to show that in the movie and preserve the same hilarity?
 
way more

way more

Member
White Man said:
It can't be worse than the TV series.
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Scooby.jpg

Ruh?
 
B

Belfast

Member
I'm still holding out hope, but the tv spots have been worrying me. They don't convey ANY of the things that I think characterizes the book as a unique work. Though, I'm kind of counting on the fact that maybe they're just a misguided attempt to get people who would never understand the humor to come see the movie anyway.
 
A

Ash Housewares

The Mountain Jew
Belfast said:
I'm still holding out hope, but the tv spots have been worrying me. They don't convey ANY of the things that I think characterizes the book as a unique work. Though, I'm kind of counting on the fact that maybe they're just a misguided attempt to get people who would never understand the humor to come see the movie anyway.
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fans will see it no matter what, why advertise for those chumps?
 
M

Mifune

Mehmber
Well, the Gargleblaster is in the final cut after all, so I wonder what else was missing from the cut he saw.

I have now spoken with Kevin Jon Davies and he confirms that the Guide entry on the Pan Galactic Gargleblaster is in the finished version which he saw this morning. Stephen Fry's narration plays over the scene of Zaphod mixing drinks for himself and Ford (using his third hand) which was briefly seen in the trailer. This narration was not in the version that I saw.
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B

Belfast

Member
Ash Housewares said:
fans will see it no matter what, why advertise for those chumps?
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Well, that's not exactly what I meant. I meant it was misguided in the way it was trying to draw interest from normal folks. The trailer just came off as cliched (lots of cg, no humor, etc., etc.) and not very well put together. If I were an average person, I don't think it would entice me to go see the movie, either.
 
F

FoneBone

Member
Belfast said:
Well, that's not exactly what I meant. I meant it was misguided in the way it was trying to draw interest from normal folks. The trailer just came off as cliched (lots of cg, no humor, etc., etc.) and not very well put together. If I were an average person, I don't think it would entice me to go see the movie, either.
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Are you talking about the first trailer or the second one? Because the new one is a lot better.
 
W

White Man

Member
mac said:
Scooby.jpg

Ruh?
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I was unaware the TV series had a following. Mind you, it's been at least 7-10 years since I've seen it, but I remember strongly disliking it compared to the other incarnations of the series. Looking around online, the show seems to have quite a few fans. I would never have guessed.

EDIT: Then again, I never would've guessed that Friends had fans either.
 
F

Flynn

Member
Belfast said:
Well, that's not exactly what I meant. I meant it was misguided in the way it was trying to draw interest from normal folks. The trailer just came off as cliched (lots of cg, no humor, etc., etc.) and not very well put together. If I were an average person, I don't think it would entice me to go see the movie, either.
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Disney is having a hard time marketing this one. The American public isn't exactly clamoring for snarky, off-beat British sci-fi.

Disney is better at selling to the mass market.
 
P

Prospero

Member
The film is out in the UK, and the BBC review is up.

Sam Rockwell does a great turn as Zaphod Beeblebrox, the two-headed president of the galaxy; Mos Def is passable as Ford Prefect; while Zooey Deschanel is beguiling as Trillian.
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A lot of effort has gone in to keeping the film as faithful to Adams' vision as possible. But somewhere in the production process the crew has lost sight of the fundamental aspect of the books - they were immensely funny.
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Despite outstanding production design and some fantastic visual effects, overall the film is a bit of a mess. A charming mess, maybe, but a mess all the same.
Click to expand...
 
F

FnordChan

Member
There's also a brief review over at Channel 4. The verdict:

"If you are new to Douglas Adams, this is like a British Fifth Element. If not, this is about as close to a faithful adaptation of his vision as the conventions of mainstream cinema allow. Flawed, loveable and a little bit silly - in other words, very British."

The full review basically says that it's pretty great, except when the Hollywood bits are being beaten in square peg/round hole style. So, like he says, flawed. I can live with flawed.

FnordChan
 
M

mrklaw

MrArseFace
A friend, who is not known for verbose reviews of movies, went to the premiere and said it was 'OK'. Not bad. He enjoyed both the TV series and Radio versions, but is no rabid fanboy.

Go in with an open mind and you should have an enjoyable time.
 
T

Teddman

Member
Naked Shuriken said:
The trailer looked horrible.
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I agree. Almost all sterile CG shots, not very imaginative looking, and hardly any dialogue or even footage of the actors (juding by the TV commercial). Wouldn't make me want to go out and drop $10 unless I was a fan.
 
J

Jim Bowie

Member
FnordChan said:
"...this is about as close to a faithful adaptation of his vision as the conventions of mainstream cinema allow."
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BINGO!

Of course it won't be a perfect translation- mainstream media WOULD NOT allow it (Save Sin City- how that ever made it to mainstream cinemas I'll never know). I have hope that Hitchhiker's will at least be as good as the made-for-TV movie.
 
C

ConfusingJazz

Member
Well, this is depressing, I was hoping for good things from this movie, but instead the studio pussed out and watered it down. HOORAY FOR HOLLYWOOD!
 
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