Okay, I'm a former Catholic altar boy (the non molested kind. I know, they're rare these days.) But come on you have to admit some of this shit is hard to swallow. (Damn, freudian slip) How about this. Assuming the holy trinity is true, Jesus is the son of God but is also God the father plus the holy spirit (which I never grasped btw. WTF is that. Tongues of fire? A third diety? Obi-Wan Kenobi's ghost in Empire Strikes Back? Why do people believe priests can turn a saltless saltine cracker into this magic Eucharist? An Oreo okay. I mean Oreos are awesome. I mean if I were a God and I wanted something to be the physical representation of my awesomeness it would be an Oreo or at least a fucking Nilla Wafer) what if, you know, when Jesus was crucified God actually died? You know, like when your girlfriend goes out of her way to make a point but you refuse to yield your argument. What if God was like hey fuckers I'm Jesus. I'm the perfect embodiment of peace, I just healed your crippled kid, raised people from the dead and, oh yeah, just because someone is a whore doesn't mean you can throw a shit load of rocks at them. Yet the guy still gets murdered. What if it was all a test and we killed God after he had to come down and show us not to be jerks. What if everything since then has been a big excuse to convice ourself it was all God's plan to let himself get nailed to a tree.
