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[arkhamguy123]

Glad the evening went well. But guard your heart friend, for real, this may protect you from a lot of pain. These dating app girls do. not. care. Until the 6th or 7th hangout or until you are the labeled boyfriend and not a second before. Personal anecdotes but so often like clockwork you'll have that magical first night and feel happy and excited and they'll string you along for a few weeks and one day just stop replying and you'll never see them again. Seriously its a thing and it can really hurt. So tread with caution but I am rooting for you.

 

[appaws]

I had my girlfriend shitting on my bed once I pulled out when I was 22.
After that she locked herself into the bathroom and started crying. What a day.

And at least three times of my dick completely full of poo. That only happened though when me and the girl were both drunk, interestingly enough.

It's still worth it though for the other times when it goes well..

: D

Ugh. Vile.

Can't these little pig sluts feel if something is brewing back there and not allow that sort of activity at that time. Don't porn whores prepare to have their rectums destroyed by Lexington Steele with enemas or something so that doesn't happen.

I know we all have our kinks, but fuck me I can't even imagine getting a Blunt Nellie, which is when you stick your dick in and hit a wall of shit.

 

[Stouffers]

Ugh. Vile.

Can't these little pig sluts feel if something is brewing back there and not allow that sort of activity at that time. Don't porn whores prepare to have their rectums destroyed by Lexington Steele with enemas or something so that doesn't happen.

I know we all have our kinks, but fuck me I can't even imagine getting a Blunt Nellie, which is when you stick your dick in and hit a wall of shit.

That’s why you always do the carrot test first. Use a carrot as the “canary.” If she refuses to eat it after, stick to the other mine shafts.

 

[Stiflers Mom]

That’s why you always do the carrot test first. Use a carrot as the “canary.” If she refuses to eat it after, stick to the other mine shafts.

What if she doesn't like carrots?
Does this work with other kinds of vegetables as well?

 

[Stiflers Mom]

eot : so, how was your tinder date, mate?

 

[haxan7]

Stiflers Mom just out of curiosity how much poop was there ? Are we talking a little leftover poop or a full size dump? Also was it a diarrhea or more solid?

 

[Stiflers Mom]

Stiflers Mom just out of curiosity how much poop was there ? Are we talking a little leftover poop or a full size dump? Also was it a diarrhea or more solid?

I'd prefer rather not to... : D

 

[bender]

I'd prefer rather not to... : D

 

[Stiflers Mom]

You really like your chocolate gifs, don't you?

 

[bender]

You really like your chocolate gifs, don't you?

 

[eot]

eot : so, how was your tinder date, mate?

Spoiler

My bed broke lol, I had to fix it

 

[Stiflers Mom]

Spoiler

My bed broke lol, I had to fix it

I am proud of you.

 

[eot]

No BJ though, not in the morning either, and she didn't want any oral herself.

Not cool.

Hope you enjoy your weekend Stiflers Mom

 

[darkangel-212559]

Eating ass is great!

Man, I'm a dirty bastard.

 

[darkangel-212559]

No BJ though, not in the morning either, and she didn't want any oral herself.

Not cool.

Hope you enjoy your weekend Stiflers Mom

No oral WELP.

 

[hariseldon]

Glad the evening went well. But guard your heart friend, for real, this may protect you from a lot of pain. These dating app girls do. not. care. Until the 6th or 7th hangout or until you are the labeled boyfriend and not a second before. Personal anecdotes but so often like clockwork you'll have that magical first night and feel happy and excited and they'll string you along for a few weeks and one day just stop replying and you'll never see them again. Seriously its a thing and it can really hurt. So tread with caution but I am rooting for you.

I was lucky enough to wife up before Tinder was a thing but it's true from what I've seen of the girls at the office. For quite a few it was a free meal, with typically several dates lined up in a week. The blokes weren't any better of course, having a similar number of dates on the go. The problem is that there's FOMO - nobody's ever good enough because there's always the possibility of finding someone better.

 

[darkangel-212559]

I was lucky enough to wife up before Tinder was a thing but it's true from what I've seen of the girls at the office. For quite a few it was a free meal, with typically several dates lined up in a week. The blokes weren't any better of course, having a similar number of dates on the go. The problem is that there's FOMO - nobody's ever good enough because there's always the possibility of finding someone better.

The pursuit of perfection is a fool's utopia. A fallacy that only leads to loneliness.

That's the tragic irony of Tinder and other dating apps.

 

[arkhamguy123]

I was lucky enough to wife up before Tinder was a thing but it's true from what I've seen of the girls at the office. For quite a few it was a free meal, with typically several dates lined up in a week. The blokes weren't any better of course, having a similar number of dates on the go. The problem is that there's FOMO - nobody's ever good enough because there's always the possibility of finding someone better.

Yeah see I wasn't like those guys, I'm younger, in my early 20s and those apps quickly taught me some valuable lessons about human nature and assumptions about other people. The first time really rocked my world, I was really hurt after what we had done and talked about. I couldn't fathom another human being so cold, deceitful and apathetic. Second time and third time I started to get it and wasn't as bothered. I almost came here to make a post about it actually that first time to see if anybody else had had this happen but I have insufficient privileges to post. Maybe one day.

I don't hate women by any means, and I'm sure as hell not an incel, but I will say bumble taught me some things about how women can be if you're not apart of their in-group in life or their routine. To say the ice is thin is putting it mildly.

 

[hariseldon]

Yeah see I wasn't like those guys, I'm younger, in my early 20s and those apps quickly taught me some valuable lessons about human nature and assumptions about other people. The first time really rocked my world, I was really hurt after what we had done and talked about. I couldn't fathom another human being so cold, deceitful and apathetic. Second time and third time I started to get it and wasn't as bothered. I almost came here to make a post about it actually that first time to see if anybody else had had this happen but I have insufficient privileges to post. Maybe one day.

I don't hate women by any means, and I'm sure as hell not an incel, but I will say bumble taught me some things about how women can be if you're not apart of their in-group in life or their routine. To say the ice is thin is putting it mildly.

I am fully aware of how women can be. One ex faked cancer, a miscarriage and her friend dying in a car crash. I was young and stupid and fell for shit but eventually twigged. Getting rid was a challenge - in the end my only way out was to go to a club and basically get off with every single god damn female in the club to make my point.

 

[arkhamguy123]

I am fully aware of how women can be. One ex faked cancer, a miscarriage and her friend dying in a car crash. I was young and stupid and fell for shit but eventually twigged. Getting rid was a challenge - in the end my only way out was to go to a club and basically get off with every single god damn female in the club to make my point.

Geez man sorry to hear that. While my experiences weren't as bad as that, they were bad enough to where that sadly doesn't surprise me at all that they would do that. But hey I think you bounced back in a pretty understandable way. Sometimes thats what it takes.

 

[darkangel-212559]

You wanna talk cold? I was in a relationship with a girl many years ago who used to self harm, anyway one day she broke up with me and told me it was because I was causing her to self harm. Obviously I felt horrendous for ages.

Then a few weeks later my friend saw her on a dating website. Turned out the real reason she broke up with me was because she was cheating on me behind my back and wanted to get rid of me, hence the whole it's your fault I self harm bs.

I think the guy ended it with her shortly afterwards and hence why she was on the dating website.

Now THAT'S cold.

 

[arkhamguy123]

You wanna talk cold? I was in a relationship with a girl many years ago who used to self harm, anyway one day she broke up with me and told me it was because I was causing her to self harm. Obviously I felt horrendous for ages.

Then a few weeks later my friend saw her on a dating website. Turned out the real reason she broke up with me was because she was cheating on me behind my back and wanted to get rid of me, hence the whole it's your fault I self harm bs.

I think the guy ended it with her shortly afterwards and hence why she was on the dating website.

Now THAT'S cold.

Jesus H Christ man. I'm sorry to hear that. Truly. Yeah that would give me trust issues big time. In fact I already have trust issues and haven't had it 1/4th as bad as that. Sorry again dude. Now of course there are guys who screw over girls who are not at fault but with all I've heard from both my guy friends, and my lady friends, that is much, much, much less common than the woman screwing over the man. I think its just how it is. Maybe it's a nature thing.

Thats why I was warning OP, had it happen to me too many times to not alert another dude. I mean look at the two stories above after I dropped that. The dating world can be a very brutal one.

 

[Stiflers Mom]

Woah, this thread got into dark territory in the meantime..

Just to update and bring this to a finish, had the second date with her yesterday evening.
Drank some wine, started fucking, fell asleep together, woke up 5 o clock in the morning, fucked again, slept again for a few hours, woke up, drank some coffee, she went home.

Nice experience.

 

[Night.Ninja]

Just some impressions from yesterday...

* was great talking with her from the first second on.
* she is very much my type. Very slim, a bit athletic, brown hair, brown eyes, pretty face, though she was my age.
* went to my flat together like 15 minutes later after meeting
* drank a bottle of wine together and talked a lot about all kinds of stuff
* started kissing and having a bit of fun
* I am not a tits guy, but wow, she had the most perfect pair I have ever seen or felt in my long career. I wonder now if they are real ones. Need to check out next time if there are any scars or something to be seen. Didn't feel like the silicone ones I have experienced on them hoes in Cali/Columbia, though.
* We didn't fuck, but decided we will do on the weekend when we meet again.
* She left a few hours later and went home.

Never thought this evening will be that good in before.
Life can be full of surprises...

 

[Ikutachi]

Stiflers Mom just out of curiosity how much poop was there ? Are we talking a little leftover poop or a full size dump? Also was it a diarrhea or more solid?

Found your fetish.

 

[Alter_Fridge]

Woah, this thread got into dark territory in the meantime..

Just to update and bring this to a finish, had the second date with her yesterday evening.
Drank some wine, started fucking, fell asleep together, woke up 5 o clock in the morning, fucked again, slept again for a few hours, woke up, drank some coffee, she went home.

Nice experience.

We need picz now

Even if you have to draw them

 

[DESTROYA]

We need picz now

Even if you have to draw them

 

[DAHGAMING]

Just over 2 yrs ago i went on a pof date, we sat outside talking, couple cups of tea, then sat by a shitty brook spoke more and got my cock rubbed through trou. Right now im sat here playing Gears 5 and shes chilling on the sofa. These dates can work.

 

[hariseldon]

Just over 2 yrs ago i went on a pof date, we sat outside talking, couple cups of tea, then sat by a shitty brook spoke more and got my cock rubbed through trou. Right now im sat here playing Gears 5 and shes chilling on the sofa. These dates can work.

Yeah I met my wife on OKCupid - didn’t plan it being much but we hit it off instantly. Obviously I got lucky considering the type of people on that site...