Devolution
Member
Or let him keep going to make the world understand a typical day at the office when you've had enough. People want this stuff aired. There you go.
IndieStatik Founder apologizes for "inappropriate" comments to female game dev
- Thread starter benny_a
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Or let him keep going to make the world understand a typical day at the office when you've had enough. People want this stuff aired. There you go.
SeanNoonan
Member
I'm going to test the waters on this.
In other news, how does this effect their Kickstarter if the site closes or whatever, wasn't he the driving force behind it all?
freenudemacusers
Member
So I asked this chick at the grocery register if I could lick her titties, and she slapped me. Now, is that a friendly playful slap, or a slap-slap. man why are women so hard to understand.
well it's a good thing he didn't wake up with morning wood and text her again.
Call professionalism and giving him a chance to back up. Instead he double downed on 20
OverBlood 3
Banned
Yup.
NoirVisage
Banned
Terrible what?
And for the non-salty , there's more where that came from..
Or your money back!
David Jaffe is a seasoned professional at taking up the wrong side of something.
It is not same situation at all, she was drunk and harmless, this guy is straight up harassing that women no matter than David "She will give you a blowjob" Jaffe says. Its just a bit silly that she is predicting that the guy will get no reprimand because he is a guy, it just paint herself as victim of an unknown enemy when theres a real victim that she ignored.
TheBaronOfNA
Banned
Almost like is tangentially related and is not the third or fourth time she does bring it up as you did not imply in the first post.
Devolution
Member
It's kind of gross to patronize a victim on how to handle an already fucked up situation.
Aquamarine
Member
And you magically know this...how? Because she didn't tell him to stop? Sexual harassment doesn't work that way.
Askherserenity
Member
Haha, he really is. I just come to expect it now actually.
Well I've known at least a couple, but they usually do it in more appropriate settings.
I'm sorry, did you not ask a question?
ultratruman
Banned
I've read it, and the messages he sent are gross and mega-creepy, but I think the traumatic or sinister side to this story is the fact that she feels under pressure from him because he's the founder of this indie community website and feels taken advantage of, right?
Whether or not this qualifies as flirting is missing the point, context is the important thing here.
Whether or not this qualifies as flirting is missing the point, context is the important thing here.
The Technomancer
card-carrying scientician
This is sexual harassment plain and simple. I'm kind of surprising people are saying it isn't
RazielCuts
Member
She didn't 'go along with it', she ignored it and tried to stay on point. Even going so far as to say 'Hey, if you want me to get you an interview I can help you out with that.' and his response to that was 'Like my penis, for your vagina.' Yeeeah, nope.
miDnIghtEr20C
Banned
I thought it was going to be much worse. All this dude was doing was Drunk texting, or facebooking or whatever. Idiot move, but she didn't say to stop after the first time, so maybe he thought she might be a bit into him, and then the liquid courage just took him to far.
Lol... kiss your vagina. Oh brother.
Lol... kiss your vagina. Oh brother.
Nail on the head right here.
Castle Doctrine
Member
Possibly. Tough to tell without hearing the woman's viewpoint.
At a bar, after buying a girl that's clearly interested in you a few drinks, probably. Over a Facebook chat? I don't fucking think so.
Salty?
In my experiment dating advice threads on gaf are terrible and make me cringe. I just felt that your post might lead others down that route.
That's okay but would you just pretend that nothing's going on like the lady in the conversation?
Well, I'm not an alcoholic. If I was one, I would probably start my day with a beer to even be able to light my cigarette (I also don't smoke FYI). Those people can drink for three days straight, it's crazy.
Anyway, let's say that he was not even drunk and he made up that apology. It doesn't matter. What seems strange to me though - why didn't she even say anything?
What he was saying was pathetic but not something that usually makes people angry, at least where I live - maybe amused. Which doesn't mean anyone needs to suffer that kind of behavior, of course. Maybe you don't like being talked to like that. But I have never seen someone who is disgusted or angry or whatever about something like this and keeps talking to the other person like a friend.
And then goes to post it all online.
There's letting it go on and creating a big public scene like this, then there's putting that man in his place right then and there in the chat - stopping it from going any further. Thinking there's just something wrong, and that's all it is, negates the meaning of this going public.
I'm not saying that making this public was wrong, I'm just defending the other viewpoint, because I feel it's appropriate.
Hm... I'm pretty sure there are statements that can be considered harassment even when they're just said once. I mean, what I'm saying is not that I think you can get away with insulting or offending anyone as badly as you like, so long as you only do it once
.But no, it doesn't have to be two separate conversations. But if this kind of thing takes place over a longer period of time, then it's obvious that it's going to be more bothersome to the recipient. It's kind of like stalking. You see someone you find hot in the bus but are too shy to talk to them and just stare a little helplessly until you or they get off the bus? That may be a little weird but totally harmless. But you follow that person around and stare at them all the time? That's going to be rather unpleasant, bothersome and disconcerting to the other person. Same thing applies here IMO.
Askherserenity
Member
Yeah, I mean, he should've seen this coming. Anything you post up on the internets can eventually come back and bite you on the ass.
Which gets me thinking, how familiar was he with her? Because dude is way too friendly.
IdreamofHIME
Member
Or she felt her position as a dev would be hurt if she knock backed such an influential person.
She never responds to any of his penis/vagina stuff, just the business comments. She tries to move the conversation in a different direction, when the only reason he's sending her messages at all is to arrange sex.
It's embarrassing.
Jaffe asking for the correct way of flirting is almost as bad.
Riposte
Member
A scenario that plays out in my head is that they are in fact friends and she doesn't know how to defuse the situation without hurting his feelings. Even flat out ignoring him (which is a better idea than what you said) could be taken as an insult.
I don't think Jaffe is being too unreasonable, but at most it humanizes the dude, not excuse him. Especially in this case, when it is just too damn awkward.
NoirVisage
Banned
He has a rocksolid point. Its a choice to work in the industry when all is said and done so "alienation" only goes so far.
I'm starting to think he's been talking to her like this for ages, and it just finally reached a boiling point with her, no one should have to be talked to in a way they don't want and she probably never saw it getting to this level.. In the end, hind sight is 20/20, but anything can happen again, i'll have to disagree and say it's good advice for anyone being addressed sexually by anyone else in the industry in a way they did not invite..
Nah it works on the internet too. It's not appropriate but it will probably get you laid, eventually.
ohbabyitsken
Banned
I disagree. I've gotten lucky with bolder statements than that at parties. I wouldn't use those words though.
Castle Doctrine
Member
How do you magically know they bother her? And if so, how much? did she feel it was "sexual harassment?" I don't know.
Which is funny when you see people lamenting that THIS is what has made them realize that Jaffe is a kind of a jerkbag
I couldn't make it through the vagina kissing tweets, I can't imagine how the person actually receiving them felt having to deal with that on two separate occasions in the same day
freenudemacusers
Member
or people who relate with weirdo creeps
nobody should have to find a new career field because 'boys will be boys' or some other nonsense.
Jaffe just reads like a person who doesn't get it.
Oh come on, this guy is obviously a freak with some severe issues but I refuse to believe that this kind of conversation is the norm in the game industry.
What a shitty way to look at the situation. You drunk text really good looking friends who are single and you know would reciprocate or realize you're drunk, or your ex girlfriend or whatever. You don't contact a "peer" in the industry and pretend to need help or information to completely sexually harass her or make her feel uncomfortable. The fact she didn't acknowledge it says it all. What do you want her to do? Write "Fuck off creep"... We don't know the power dynamic between the two. She could be a lowly dev and he a powerful founder or whatever.
HP_Wuvcraft
Banned
Yeah, that was.... that was special.
Why does your opinion matter?
jim-jam bongs
Member
With these posts I always wonder how many fedoras the poster owns. Wait, I already used that joke. How about: with these posts I always wonder what the poster's post count on r/mensrights is.
Devolution
Member
Some of this.
I'm loving the "why did she let it continue and embarrass him further."
What.
NoirVisage
Banned
i'm in the unique perspective of feeling bad for the victim and embarrassed for the perpetrator. I expected better from him by virtue of him being in an industry thats got enough issues with this sort of thing.
i'm half joking, and this thread is way too tense to ever go there, for better or worse
Murder. She Wrote
Member
Wow Jaffe is just being despicable.
I like to think that every time a big sexist controversy happens in the game industry, it's just growing pains to a better future.
I like to think that every time a big sexist controversy happens in the game industry, it's just growing pains to a better future.
How the flying fuck does Jaffe think his viewpoint is in any way rational? The lady was clearly trying to brush it off (as any normal person would do in that situation) in a non-hostile way. How he thinks that "Oh well she didn't say stop, so it's her fault for letting him say those things to her" is an acceptable viewpoint is a pretty damning indictment of him.
Speedloafer
Neo Member
Or has done similar.
blitzcloud
Banned
From the convo, she seemed polite enough to "friendzone" him without him noticing and trying again. The moment where he's like "me tarzan you jane hmph hmph hmph" is pretty...eh... I dunno lol.
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