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LadyGAF Advises ManGAF

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Well, I'm not an idiot. If I suspect that they aren't exactly the age they say they are (which could get me in trouble) then I'll ask them to prove it.

But, my problem is more of getting to the point where I'd have to ask them for ID if I got suspicious!
 
Londa said:
Was waiting for my dedicated haters to enter. :P
How does assuring me that the quality of "responding to people as if they weren't trolling when they really are" is one of your essential characteristics equal being a dedicated hater?
Gosh that sentence is so hypotactic I might need to make a parsing diagram for it or something
Professor Beef said:
That's called "arousal," my friend.
Wat.
 
cooljeanius said:
How does assuring me that the quality of "responding to people as if they weren't trolling when they really are" is one of your essential characteristics equal being a dedicated hater?
Gosh that sentence is so hypotactic I might need to make a parsing diagram for it or something
Wat.
*scratches head* I didn't quote you when I said that. I'm not sure why you think that.

Why did I give Timedog advice? Because I knew he would say something funny. I wanted to laugh.

Its better than giving guys actual advice because most won't even use it.

Then there is the fact that I'm no trained professional relationship advisor. So I would hate to give advice and it mess up someones relationship.

On a relative note, I think guys are trolling this thread because they feel girls are trying to bring special attention to themselves or attention whore (I think their wrong but what can you do?). On ther internet if a female mentions she is a real live female, she will be concidered an attention whore within five minutes.
 
Inanna said:
Are you serious? :\ Never thought I'd say this but I guess some people really do find trolls amusing.
Just this once. This Dear Abby thread is quite surreal, its funny to see some jabs at it..

EDIT:
The bus stop. Headphones in your ear. Headphones in the girl's ear. How to break the ice without being a "what's the weather like?" cheeseball? OR, is it one of those lost cause scenarios?
Stare at her, start gyrating like you're listening to the same music until she laughs. This is universal, all vaginas love this.
 
Londa said:
Because this isn't the first time he has hated?

Any other questions?
OK, so there was some previous history... I was just wondering if it was that statement particularly, or if you were referring to past events.
 
Thing with getting advice from women is - women don't know what they want.

Ask a man the same question 10 times, he will always answer (and do, that's the important part) the same thing.

Ask a woman the same question 10 times, she will answer 3 or 4 different things, depending on mood, day of the week, if a friend is listening, etc, etc. To make matters worse, women will say one thing and do another - not lying... they actually believe one thing, but emotion will make them do another thing entirely. Anyone that has had a few GFs knows this, don't even try to deny it.
 
Frankfurt said:
Thing with getting advice from women is - women don't know what they want.

Ask a man the same question 10 times, he will always answer (and do, that's the important part) the same thing.

Ask a woman the same question 10 times, she will answer 3 or 4 different things, depending on mood, day of the week, if a friend is listening, etc, etc. To make matters worse, women will say one thing and do another - not lying... they actually believe one thing, but emotion will make them do another thing entirely. Anyone that has had a few GFs knows this, don't even try to deny it.

True. Women can't even figure out each other. Giving 'advice' to guys is a waste of time.

If you're looking to attract women, the only thing that's a constant, that women always go for is confidence. It's not the fact the guy is good looking, loaded, plays guitar, has a GSOH or a giant cock - it's the fact that whatever it is makes him confident. Wherever you find it, whatever you do (even if you fake it) if you've got confidence you're in there.
 
mokeyjoe said:
If you're looking to attract women, the only thing that's a constant, that women always go for is confidence. It's not the fact the guy is good looking, loaded, plays guitar, has a GSOH or a giant cock - it's the fact that whatever it is makes him confident. Wherever you find it, whatever you do (even if you fake it) if you've got confidence you're in there.
This is exactly what EVERY SINGLE female has been saying in this topic... Not so bad at giving relationship advice after all then, huh? :\
 
mokeyjoe said:
True. Women can't even figure out each other. Giving 'advice' to guys is a waste of time.

If you're looking to attract women, the only thing that's a constant, that women always go for is confidence. It's not the fact the guy is good looking, loaded, plays guitar, has a GSOH or a giant cock - it's the fact that whatever it is makes him confident. Wherever you find it, whatever you do (even if you fake it) if you've got confidence you're in there.

I have a lot of self-confidence but it's never helped me with the ladies. Self-confidence isn't the same as being able to hit on random women though.
 
Tkawsome said:
I have a lot of self-confidence but it's never helped me with the ladies. Self-confidence isn't the same as being able to hit on random women though.
Could you clarify this distinction for me?
 
Tkawsome said:
I have a lot of self-confidence but it's never helped me with the ladies. Self-confidence isn't the same as being able to hit on random women though.

Agreed.

If anything, self confidence just shows me that most people aren't worth asking out.
 
cooljeanius said:
Could you clarify this distinction for me?

I'm confident in who I am. I'm proud of a lot of my accomplishments and abilities, I'm focused on making myself better, have a lot of friends, and firmly believe I have a bright future. In general, I feel good about who I am and where I'm headed.

Still never had any success with women though.

Honestly, it has led me to believe that when people say confidence they really mean "Initiate everything because the woman isn't going to do anything". At least that's been a common theme in my life.
 
Chiave said:
So, has anyone decided to go dancing yet?
01laugh.gif


These threads never work that way
 
cooljeanius said:
Could you clarify this distinction for me?
Google PUA (Pick Up Artists) and you'll see all the nuances that can go into hitting on women for different purposes.

To pick up women confidence is an integral part. However, just because you have confidence does not mean you can inherently pick up women.
 
Frankfurt said:
Thing with getting advice from women is - women don't know what they want.

Ask a man the same question 10 times, he will always answer (and do, that's the important part) the same thing.

Ask a woman the same question 10 times, she will answer 3 or 4 different things, depending on mood, day of the week, if a friend is listening, etc, etc. To make matters worse, women will say one thing and do another - not lying... they actually believe one thing, but emotion will make them do another thing entirely. Anyone that has had a few GFs knows this, don't even try to deny it.

It's great that you feel this way, but this isn't really the thread for it. There are plenty of Bro-Age PUA Ladder Theory Dem Bitches Be Crazy threads out there.

This thread is very specifically for men who are looking advice from women who post on GAF. It was created because men couldn't stop asking for advice from women who post on GAF in the thread designed for women who post on GAF. Men are of course totally able and willing to post their opinions in this thread as well, just mind that the primary purpose of the thread is for women to advise men and if you think women are fickle, crazy things, this isn't the thread for you.
 
Tkawsome said:
I'm confident in who I am. I'm proud of a lot of my accomplishments and abilities, I'm focused on making myself better, have a lot of friends, and firmly believe I have a bright future. In general, I feel good about who I am and where I'm headed.

Still never had any success with women though.

Honestly, it has led me to believe that when people say confidence they really mean "Initiate everything because the woman isn't going to do anything". At least that's been a common theme in my life.

Well yes there are tons of cultural pressures that make this so. Women initiating stuff will usually be subtle. Girls making the first move/asking out are increasing in number but are still the minority.
 
Londa said:
*scratches head* I didn't quote you when I said that. I'm not sure why you think that.

Why did I give Timedog advice? Because I knew he would say something funny. I wanted to laugh.

Its better than giving guys actual advice because most won't even use it.
I found the advice I was given helpful. Some people genuinely want advice and do appreciate it.
Then there is the fact that I'm no trained professional relationship advisor. So I would hate to give advice and it mess up someones relationship.
Just state where you're coming from and it's fine. People know what they're getting by coming in here -- no one is delusioned into thinking this is more than it is.

On a relative note, I think guys are trolling this thread because they feel girls are trying to bring special attention to themselves or attention whore (I think their wrong but what can you do?). On ther internet if a female mentions she is a real live female, she will be concidered an attention whore within five minutes.
It really depends. If a girl brings attention to her gender without any reason, I'd consider it being an attention whore. Or if someone does it in passing a bunch of times. Stating your gender when asked or when it has context to the discussion is not attention whoring, and I don't often see people called out for it under those circumstances. The biggest draw-in of being labeled an attention whore, that I've noticed, is posting a photograph of yourself. Which again there are ways that are not so much, and ways that are (ie. Koshiba). Granted it doesn't justify most of the reactions these things get.

This is really less to do with sexism (in my opinion), and more to do with females being the gross minority (at least at face value) in many communities. Not that it isn't sexist at all, but if women were just as common as men in places like this, I really doubt a girl would be labeled an attention whore for making her gender known.

And I do not think this thread is an attempt at attention or anything. Women are an extreme minority on these boards, so having a thread devoted to women seems more than fair. And having a thread like this to keep the other thread on track also makes a lot of sense.

EDIT: In a way it's a lot like sex in these type of communities. Some threads are entirely devoted to sex while in other just mentioning it gets you labeled as an attention whore.
 
Dear Ladies: why do I have to play the waiting game if you obviously like me and I so very well like you? Busted my balls and asked out a girl last week, she said yes and we went on a date the same day. She was very much interested and so was I. She took my phone, saved her number. We walked to the station, gave each other a hug and she said "Message me ASAP!"

I message her when I got in and said "ASAP!"

After a few minutes, we stopped texting as both our batteries were dying/dead. We said that we'll text when batteries are charged.

Now I've been in touch with her for the past few days and I called her once but she was in a meeting and she said she'll call me (didn't). Now I know for a fact that she is playing the goddamn waiting game and I have subconsciously broken the rules as I've been in touch with her. She's quite busy (Hell, she was working when I asked her out) so I understand that but I'm positive that even though she told me she doesn't play the waiting game, she is playing the shit outta it!

Today, I decided not to call/text/arrange-a-date her until she does. Either that or I'll reboot the waiting game and call her on Friday without the text.

I... don't get it! She was impressed by the balls of steel I showed by asking her out in front of hundred of passerby and now... this!


Why, girls, why?! Why you have to be so playful and dangerous?!

Oh and the question is: should I forget about her, reboot the waiting game or wait for her to contact?

Again, I have yet to talk on the phone as so far it's pure texty (which I am hating... A lot!)
 
shagg_187 said:
Dear Ladies: why do I have to play the waiting game if you obviously like me and I so very well like you? Busted my balls and asked out a girl last week, she said yes and we went on a date the same day. She was very much interested and so was I. She took my phone, saved her number. We walked to the station, gave each other a hug and she said "Message me ASAP!"

I message her when I got in and said "ASAP!"

After a few minutes, we stopped texting as both our batteries were dying/dead. We said that we'll text when batteries are charged.

Now I've been in touch with her for the past few days and I called her once but she was in a meeting and she said she'll call me (didn't). Now I know for a fact that she is playing the goddamn waiting game and I have subconsciously broken the rules as I've been in touch with her. She's quite busy (Hell, she was working when I asked her out) so I understand that but I'm positive that even though she told me she doesn't play the waiting game, she is playing the shit outta it!

Today, I decided not to call/text/arrange-a-date her until she does. Either that or I'll reboot the waiting game and call her on Friday without the text.

I... don't get it! She was impressed by the balls of steel I showed by asking her out in front of hundred of passerby and now... this!


Why, girls, why?! Why you have to be so playful and dangerous?!

Oh and the question is: should I forget about her, reboot the waiting game or wait for her to contact?

Again, I have yet to talk on the phone as so far it's pure texty (which I am hating... A lot!)

I would just wait for her, since you've already tried contacting her and she couldn't talk. She's just making you chase her around ;P
 
Frankfurt said:
Thing with getting advice from women is - women don't know what they want.

Ask a man the same question 10 times, he will always answer (and do, that's the important part) the same thing.

Ask a woman the same question 10 times, she will answer 3 or 4 different things, depending on mood, day of the week, if a friend is listening, etc, etc. To make matters worse, women will say one thing and do another - not lying... they actually believe one thing, but emotion will make them do another thing entirely. Anyone that has had a few GFs knows this, don't even try to deny it.

Hahaha. "Boohoo, why is one girl's opinions different from another girl's? Why aren't they all the same people? Why are all women so inconsistent even when they really aren't and I'm just generalizing a whole gender? Why can't women be more like men?" That's what I'm getting out of this. xD

Anyhowsit, thread's for female opinions if you want them. No gaurantees on any advice working for you!

shagg_187 said:
Dear Ladies: why do I have to play the waiting game if you obviously like me and I so very well like you? Busted my balls and asked out a girl last week, she said yes and we went on a date the same day. She was very much interested and so was I. She took my phone, saved her number. We walked to the station, gave each other a hug and she said "Message me ASAP!"

I message her when I got in and said "ASAP!"

After a few minutes, we stopped texting as both our batteries were dying/dead. We said that we'll text when batteries are charged.

Now I've been in touch with her for the past few days and I called her once but she was in a meeting and she said she'll call me (didn't). Now I know for a fact that she is playing the goddamn waiting game and I have subconsciously broken the rules as I've been in touch with her. She's quite busy (Hell, she was working when I asked her out) so I understand that but I'm positive that even though she told me she doesn't play the waiting game, she is playing the shit outta it!

Today, I decided not to call/text/arrange-a-date her until she does. Either that or I'll reboot the waiting game and call her on Friday without the text.

I... don't get it! She was impressed by the balls of steel I showed by asking her out in front of hundred of passerby and now... this!


Why, girls, why?! Why you have to be so playful and dangerous?!

Oh and the question is: should I forget about her, reboot the waiting game or wait for her to contact?

Again, I have yet to talk on the phone as so far it's pure texty (which I am hating... A lot!)

I'd just wait for her to contact you back and stop worrying. Could be she's nervous or busy or lost interest or something, but you did most of the work already and if she is actually still interested, she'll contact you. After a week has gone by: stop hoping.

Maybe she's just a flake. Aren't all sorts of poeple flakey all the time? It's not just girls. >_>
 
shagg_187 said:
Dear Ladies: why do I have to play the waiting game if you obviously like me and I so very well like you? Busted my balls and asked out a girl last week, she said yes and we went on a date the same day. She was very much interested and so was I. She took my phone, saved her number. We walked to the station, gave each other a hug and she said "Message me ASAP!"

I message her when I got in and said "ASAP!"

After a few minutes, we stopped texting as both our batteries were dying/dead. We said that we'll text when batteries are charged.

Now I've been in touch with her for the past few days and I called her once but she was in a meeting and she said she'll call me (didn't). Now I know for a fact that she is playing the goddamn waiting game and I have subconsciously broken the rules as I've been in touch with her. She's quite busy (Hell, she was working when I asked her out) so I understand that but I'm positive that even though she told me she doesn't play the waiting game, she is playing the shit outta it!

Today, I decided not to call/text/arrange-a-date her until she does. Either that or I'll reboot the waiting game and call her on Friday without the text.

I... don't get it! She was impressed by the balls of steel I showed by asking her out in front of hundred of passerby and now... this!


Why, girls, why?! Why you have to be so playful and dangerous?!

Oh and the question is: should I forget about her, reboot the waiting game or wait for her to contact?

Again, I have yet to talk on the phone as so far it's pure texty (which I am hating... A lot!)

How many days has it been since you've heard back?

Best case scenario, she'll get back in touch with you when she has a break in her schedule.

Worst case scenario, she'll be a coward like most people and never contact you back.
 
Thanks for the advices. It been a day since we last communicated (24 hrs to be exact. She said she'll message me when she wakes up so I don't want to be the one to message). I'll wait it out and see if she contacts. If not, I'll call her on Friday. If she rejects again then I'll part ways and keep greasing my newly grown balls of steel... :lol
 
Devolution, since you're in the thread now, I just want you to know that I'm holding out for you. Even if it takes 50 years of GAF posts, I'm gonna make you fall in love with me. Even if we're old and no longer the beautiful people that we both are right now.
 
Timedog said:
Devolution, since you're in the thread now, I just want you to know that I'm holding out for you. Even if it takes 50 years of GAF posts, I'm gonna make you fall in love with me. Even if we're old and no longer the beautiful people that we both are right now.
Make sure to speak in a loud, obnoxious tone. Also, pretend you're a know-it-all.
 
I just read the OP and laughed. My fiancé and I were out with a few friends at a bar in Chicago dancing. We were having fun, whatever, when this dude sort of slips in and starts creeper grinding all over one of the girls that came out with us.

That is always a bad idea forever.

Also, confidence is huge, but not in a pompous ass-hat sort of way. Confidence in a bold, yet refined sense. Go up to a cute girl that you make eye contact with and say hi. Even if that's all you do, it shows that you're comfortable enough to approach a women. My fiancé tells me that her single friends find it incredibly sexy to have a guy ACTUALLY come up to them versus stare at them awkwardily across the room/bus/grocery store/etc.

To prove a point to a friend (that girls do like when a guy gives them attention), we were at Barnes and Noble. I saw a super cute girl and browsed the books near her. I made a comment about the topic of book she was looking at, we talked a bit, had a few laughs, and said our goodbyes. She kept glimpsing over at me until we left. Literally, all it takes is the willingness to approach and say something to a girl, and that puts you lightyears above the creepy dudes creepin.
 
So OP, I was quietly browsing this thread in bed the other night and didn't think much of it really. However, the next day during one of my University sessions while we were waiting for our tutor, we had a conversation between our tables which eventually came to the topic of dancing when one of the class said that's how he met his fiancée, and I (in my head) perked up a little. I thought back to reading this thread the night before and thought hmm, maybe this is something that can work!

Now, I haven't gotten to the stage of my life where I have sought out help from that thread but is there any particular type of dance you'd recommend starting out with?
 
nicoga3000 said:
I just read the OP and laughed. My fiancé and I were out with a few friends at a bar in Chicago dancing. We were having fun, whatever, when this dude sort of slips in and starts creeper grinding all over one of the girls that came out with us.

That is always a bad idea forever.

Also, confidence is huge, but not in a pompous ass-hat sort of way. Confidence in a bold, yet refined sense. Go up to a cute girl that you make eye contact with and say hi. Even if that's all you do, it shows that you're comfortable enough to approach a women. My fiancé tells me that her single friends find it incredibly sexy to have a guy ACTUALLY come up to them versus stare at them awkwardily across the room/bus/grocery store/etc.

To prove a point to a friend (that girls do like when a guy gives them attention), we were at Barnes and Noble. I saw a super cute girl and browsed the books near her. I made a comment about the topic of book she was looking at, we talked a bit, had a few laughs, and said our goodbyes. She kept glimpsing over at me until we left. Literally, all it takes is the willingness to approach and say something to a girl, and that puts you lightyears above the creepy dudes creepin.

I can attest to these! I'm not really a big dancer, I actually am much more turned on by a guy who feels confident enough to approach me and actually strike up a conversation. And I mean about something relevant and interesting, not about how hot/beautiful/sexy I look that night.

I tend to be a big recluse though. I prefer staying in with my BF and playing games or working on art. I dislike going out to clubs and bars. I do come out of my shell when it comes to conventions. I had a few interesting guys approach me at Dragoncon, talked to me about the IT crowd and video games. It does depend on the person, but a good balance of confidence vs arrogance is usually good advice.
 
Mush said:
So OP, I was quietly browsing this thread in bed the other night and didn't think much of it really. However, the next day during one of my University sessions while we were waiting for our tutor, we had a conversation between our tables which eventually came to the topic of dancing when one of the class said that's how he met his fiancée, and I (in my head) perked up a little. I thought back to reading this thread the night before and thought hmm, maybe this is something that can work!

Now, I haven't gotten to the stage of my life where I have sought out help from that thread but is there any particular type of dance you'd recommend starting out with?

The only dancing I've ever done and enjoyed was swing! But I'm old fashioned...

I do know that a lot of my female friends like a dance that has a romantic connotation, like Salsa or Tango.
 
So purposely stumbling around like Squall during a dance works, right?

Prax, I need to know.

If not, can I just feign leg cramps? Laguna seemed to do everything wrong but was the true winner in the end.
 
Inanna said:
This is exactly what EVERY SINGLE female has been saying in this topic... Not so bad at giving relationship advice after all then, huh? :\
That advice is true for just about anyone and for anything.

No offense, but I don't think LadyGaf is the place to go to if you want to hear opinions from the average girl. The type of female that is drawn to Gaf is not going to represent the average girl that you're crushing on at work or school.
 
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