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LadyGAF Advises ManGAF
- Thread starter Mineshaft_Gap
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Silphonica
Banned
I danced for the first time on Saturday. No idea why, but these two chicks won't leave me alone, it's not like I was good.
Don't pick me up wrong, I don't dance out of lack of confidence, I just think it's boring as shit.
Don't pick me up wrong, I don't dance out of lack of confidence, I just think it's boring as shit.
blame space
Banned
i danced three weeks ago and seven bitches are on my junk as i type this
Ben Pierce
Member
I have a girlfriend, and I live with her, so I've noticed many things about you people. Why are you all so emotional? It doesn't take a lot to make a woman cry, and I genuinely don't try to do it, but I can say something that turns her eyes into a faucet.
Silphonica
Banned
blame space said:
My dad could out dance your dad.
Devolution
Member
Ben Pierce said:
I've noticed in more than a few relationships that a guy thinks he can say some cold ass shit, in front of others no less, and think that it's perfectly acceptable.
Prax
Member
If you are not being a total jerkface, then maybe it's just your girlfriend is just more sensitive than most or has emotional/esteem issues? :lBen Pierce said:
List some examples so that I may judge you. lol
I am not much of a leaky faucet, and there be some cold stoic ladies around the world as well.
Ben Pierce said:
Some girls might have triggers depending on their past. My wife can go pretty quickly into crying if I even get near raising my voice or showing any sign of anger at her, really, because her parents used to openly fight a ton in front of her. It triggers bad memories.
brucewaynegretzky
Member
Prax said:
My girlfriend is one of the least likely to cry people I know. Her default emotional response to "problem" is anger not sadness.
Devolution
Member
RDreamer said:
This is a good point as well. A couple of my pals have been in abusive relationships, so any sort of raised voice puts them on edge.
Shao Kahn Brewing a Stew
Banned
Yep. Forgot about it already. Moved on, got a few more numbers. Holy shit, either I'm on a roll and need to press my luck elsewhere (like a lottery lol) or the girls in first year of university are way too friendlier to those in fourth. Most definitely the latter. That and the classy suit I was sporting might have helped... :/ikkemenx said:
Ben Pierce
Member
Prax said:
I'm a realist, and I don't lie. I tell her the truth all of the time and how I really feel about things, and I guess it hurts her feelings.
Sometimes she'll want sex, and I'll tell her I'm not it in the mood for it, and the tears flow. She says I'm the only man to tell her I don't want sex with her, but then I proceed to tell her that sex is a two-way street, and we both have to be in the mood for it. She'll accuse me of not having a sex drive, and then I'll mention all of the times I tried to get in to her pants and when she shot me down. I get over that really quick, because I don't care. I know I'll eventually get some pussy. She takes it way harder than I do.
When I have to cover her part on bills, I'll let her know that it's not my responsibility to take care of her bills and mine, but I'll do it anyway, because I love her, but I expect her to pay me back promptly. She's just bad with money, and I let her know about it often and try to offer solutions to her so that she'll have more money on hand. She buys little things all of the time that add up to a lot in end.
If she does something that pisses me off, I'll tell her to stop, because she is pissing me off. That usually triggers her exit out of the room with stomping and the slamming of doors.
I usually always call her out on her bullshit.
Devolution
Member
Kalnos said:
Variations of "you can be such a bitch sometimes." "What the fuck is wrong with you." "Shut the fuck up." "You're a bimbo/dumbass." These are more specific but I've heard stuff that's basically saying these things without being as vulgar. Then when she gets upset, "oh it's just a joke."
It's just disrespectful blunt shit that shouldn't be said to someone you supposedly hold in high esteem or at least not in public for everyone else to hear. I've heard it both ways too, but I've heard much more often from a guy demeaning his girl.
brucewaynegretzky
Member
Devolution said:
HAHAHAHAHA. My gf says this shit to me in front of my parents. (I love my relationship. I'm not a very "emotional" person and my gf is amazing for putting up with me.)
Devolution
Member
brucewaynegretzky said:
Cold blooded. I should add it depends on how much malice is behind the words.
brucewaynegretzky
Member
Devolution said:
True. We're both very sarcastic people. If either of us took one another seriously when we spoke we'd probably be seriously emotionally scarred. We both know how the other feels.
Prax
Member
All of that sounds like esteem issues on her part, but I don't know how angry/judgy/condescending your tone is while saying these things. Maybe they all sound like threats.Ben Pierce said:
She probably expects you to be softer on her as her boyfriend. Maybe she can take it from everyone else in the world, but a loved one judging her triggers the tears. Then again, maybe crying is how she gets her way?
I suppose if you want to stop triggering this, you should be less blunt, but if you're willing to have her tears come on all the time and hope she somehow builds up resistance.. feel free? You make it sound like this happens very often. Doesn't this put a big strain on your relationship though? I can only imagine what she must be telling her friends about you.
Oh great, this is perfect. I've been waiting for a thread like this...
OK ladies here is my er...predicament:
About a year ago I noticed that my neighbor is a woman. And by neighbor I mean she is literally on the other side of the wall. We live in an apartment building and her studio is adjacent to mine.
I didn't really think much of it at first since at the time I was seriously dating someone and I was very happy. Well, I'm single again and I became interested in her this summer when I ran into her a few times leaving to go to work/coming home.
The first couple times we simply exchanged hellos. By that time I was eager to get the ball rolling so I decided that if I saw her again I would introduce myself. When I saw her next I made a light joke about us being on the same schedule lately, she laughed and I introduced myself. We made small talk walking down the stairs, wished each other a good day and parted at the front door. Now, I have to say that I am horrible at reading women but she seemed calm and friendly about it and not in a rush to get away from me. She made eye contact and responded to everything I said/asked with a smile. She asked me if I was going on a trip (I had a huge bag of laundry to drop off on the way to work). I don't want to read into anything but I did expect her to be more uncomfortable given that some guy is approaching her as she shuts the door to her home.
Since then I have not had the luck to bump into her and have been racking my brain as to some creative solution to bridging the gap between the current situation and one where it would be appropriate or even possible to ask her out. Every scenario I can think of comes off as creepy and stalkery to me.
What do the ladies think? Should I even attempt this? If you were my neighbor can you imagine any scenario where you wouldn't be freaked out by your neighbor asking you out?
OK ladies here is my er...predicament:
About a year ago I noticed that my neighbor is a woman. And by neighbor I mean she is literally on the other side of the wall. We live in an apartment building and her studio is adjacent to mine.
I didn't really think much of it at first since at the time I was seriously dating someone and I was very happy. Well, I'm single again and I became interested in her this summer when I ran into her a few times leaving to go to work/coming home.
The first couple times we simply exchanged hellos. By that time I was eager to get the ball rolling so I decided that if I saw her again I would introduce myself. When I saw her next I made a light joke about us being on the same schedule lately, she laughed and I introduced myself. We made small talk walking down the stairs, wished each other a good day and parted at the front door. Now, I have to say that I am horrible at reading women but she seemed calm and friendly about it and not in a rush to get away from me. She made eye contact and responded to everything I said/asked with a smile. She asked me if I was going on a trip (I had a huge bag of laundry to drop off on the way to work). I don't want to read into anything but I did expect her to be more uncomfortable given that some guy is approaching her as she shuts the door to her home.
Since then I have not had the luck to bump into her and have been racking my brain as to some creative solution to bridging the gap between the current situation and one where it would be appropriate or even possible to ask her out. Every scenario I can think of comes off as creepy and stalkery to me.
What do the ladies think? Should I even attempt this? If you were my neighbor can you imagine any scenario where you wouldn't be freaked out by your neighbor asking you out?
Shao Kahn Brewing a Stew
Banned
Ahhh!!! Follow up to my dilemma.
I called her today after letting her be for three days. She didn't pick up. I wrote her a text:
"Hey ****. Called you; you must be busy. This might sound weird but I might have done something wrong that turned you off. Do correct me if I'm wrong; to be honest, I'm not good at playing the dating/waiting game. I've heard of "rules" of not calling until the third day or not texting after the third day, etc. I respect the rules the world follows but I'm brutally honest and straight to the point, and I might have missed out on it. I liked your company, your honesty, your personality and your beautiful smile. I know you don't like it when people say sorry, but I apologize if I am wrong and a bigger apology if I am right.
In short: I would love to hear from you again. I still didn't get your last name! lol"
I went to sleep knowing that this might be the last text message I send her. Already made up my mind in moving on, though it would be hard finding someone of her caliber.
But then...
She called a 15 minutes ago and said that she thought that I'm actually ignoring her cause she send some texts and I didn't respond, so she gave me space since she doesn't like playing the dating/waiting game either. She's working overtime this week so she can send her parents on a cruise (her dad's birthday is coming up) and she didn't call/text all day cause someone at her work fucked up a transaction and instead of charging $10,000, they charged $100.00, so she had to go through loads of transactions to figure out what happened and is correcting the issue, etc.
Long story short: I'm still in the greens and she wants to hang out next week, and she "really" wants me to be myself and bug her as much as I can (of course, I won't bug her a lot now, knowing what she is going through) cause she likes it and doesn't mind at all...! ;D
This is where I put a holster on myself and stop flirting with others... for now lol!
Thanks for listening to my girl-gaf episode, and thanks for the advices! D:
I called her today after letting her be for three days. She didn't pick up. I wrote her a text:
"Hey ****. Called you; you must be busy. This might sound weird but I might have done something wrong that turned you off. Do correct me if I'm wrong; to be honest, I'm not good at playing the dating/waiting game. I've heard of "rules" of not calling until the third day or not texting after the third day, etc. I respect the rules the world follows but I'm brutally honest and straight to the point, and I might have missed out on it. I liked your company, your honesty, your personality and your beautiful smile. I know you don't like it when people say sorry, but I apologize if I am wrong and a bigger apology if I am right.
In short: I would love to hear from you again. I still didn't get your last name! lol"
I went to sleep knowing that this might be the last text message I send her. Already made up my mind in moving on, though it would be hard finding someone of her caliber.
But then...
She called a 15 minutes ago and said that she thought that I'm actually ignoring her cause she send some texts and I didn't respond, so she gave me space since she doesn't like playing the dating/waiting game either. She's working overtime this week so she can send her parents on a cruise (her dad's birthday is coming up) and she didn't call/text all day cause someone at her work fucked up a transaction and instead of charging $10,000, they charged $100.00, so she had to go through loads of transactions to figure out what happened and is correcting the issue, etc.
Long story short: I'm still in the greens and she wants to hang out next week, and she "really" wants me to be myself and bug her as much as I can (of course, I won't bug her a lot now, knowing what she is going through) cause she likes it and doesn't mind at all...! ;D
This is where I put a holster on myself and stop flirting with others... for now lol!
Thanks for listening to my girl-gaf episode, and thanks for the advices! D:
Ben Pierce said:
I am kinda in a similar situation other than the fact she is the one who is better with money in general lol. She use to tell me the same thing about the whole sex drive thing, i don't get sometimes. i'm guessing I miss signals so that's on me. And she does tell me to try sugar-coat it sometimes but I just have a bad habit of speaking as I think it which gets her fustrated if she doesn't understand it. If I can get past that, everything would be practically great.
Atramental
Banned
Here's this one thing that's been bugging me that I wanted to get a women's perspective on:
If I don't make a lot eye contact during a conversation does that set off any red flags?
I could be talking to one of my female classmates and my eyes just dart all over the room or I just glance at a wall. And when my eyes do align with the other person's eyes it's only for a couple of seconds.
If I don't make a lot eye contact during a conversation does that set off any red flags?
I could be talking to one of my female classmates and my eyes just dart all over the room or I just glance at a wall. And when my eyes do align with the other person's eyes it's only for a couple of seconds.
cooljeanius
Member
I kinda hate the norm of having to make eye contact. There are other cultures that don't have that norm, why can't we get rid of it, too?
So true. Dancing lessons are on my list of things to start doing. I have a fun time doing the WHITE AUSTRALIAN MALE (beer in one hand, bobbing head to beat).Ducky_McGee said:
I'm liking the idea for this thread. I have nice female friends, but their advice mostly is centred around setting me up with their single friends and rescuing them from their lives (cute but introverted and sad). They all list their favourite book as Pride and Prejudice and that scares me.
I need more outgoing friends truth be told.
shanshan310
Member
140.85 said:
Seems to me like she's just being friendly. But if you want to try and see where it goes go ahead. Would it be awkward if she said no?
cooljeanius
Member
Probably because short guys are below the ladies' eye level, so they just look right over their heads. (Sorry, couldn't resist it)purple cobra said:
shanshan310
Member
purple cobra said:
Taller guys are more likely to get jobs as well.
but I'm 5'1. Its not hard to be taller than me. I never really notice guys' heights, they just fall into either "Much taller than me" or "A bit taller than me" categories. It doesn't really matter to me, but my boyfriend gets pretty bad neck cramps (he's like 6'3). Someone within "kissing while standing" range is probably nicer when it comes to kissing/dancing etc, but its not important.
cooljeanius
Member
I'm 6'0", and people always seem surprised to realize that I'm actually kinda tall. Sometimes I'm surprised myself, as I was more on the short end as a kid.
Nizz
Member
cooljeanius said:
Thanks for replying. That part about taller guys getting a job is probably ringing true for me right now as well. Had an interview about a month and a half ago and I'm sure they thought I was a bit small for the job. It dealt with moving stuff in a furniture store and I'm 5' 3". It is what it is, you know. I've accepted being my height a long time ago. I've been around too long to worry about stuff like that.shanshan310 said:
My height has come up a couple of times though regarding women. I've heard the "he's cute, he's just a little short" thing before. What are you gonna do....
shanshan310
Member
On the plus side, there are a lot of sex moves you can pull off that a tall guy would never be able to. And lots of girls dig cute.
shanshan310
Member
hteng said:
That sounds more painful than anything.
talisayNon
Member
height = 95% of the game. 5 8 guys ad below are fighting a uphill battle
clearacell
Member
talisayNon said:
I'm crying on the inside...woe is me and my pathetic mexican genes
SolidusDave
Member
talisayNon said:
This is true.
(unless of course you're famous, very rich or the girl is at least one head shorter than you. Though obviously in the latter case that just puts you on equal ground with taller men, doesn't mean you have a sure shot now)
There are very few girls that don't prefer tall men / don't care about height (more common in long-term relationships). On the other hand there are a lot of girls that actually demand the partner to be a lot taller than themselves.
Height is basically the only visual attribute that is important to women (if only subconsciously).
You can have a fat belly, or a small cock, or no muscles, or an ugly face, but it doesn't matter much if you are tall. Gives girls a feeling of being secure (even though I'm pretty sure I can beat up most taller guys ;P ).
Especially true if you're very thin (fat would probably be worse though), that's why you can often see short, super-muscular guys as they try to do something for their confidence.
You don't want to be "cute".
I'm 5.7/5.8 and I don't even have to try my game with girls that are taller than 5.4/5.5 or whatever. Really reduces the market.
There is one cool thing about girls that don't care though, usually they have a high confidence and follow their own path (career etc.).
However, I'm a hypocrite as I would feel uncomfortable in a serious relationship if the girl was a lot taller than me. I like to feel like some kind of protector. Though for me, unlike for girls, height is not much of a factor for the general hotness of a person.
edit:
I had quite a crush on some girls that were around the exact same height as me (which actually has logical advantages
), but to them I'm not attractive (good looking yes, but not attractive). /bitterNo and I disagree.talisayNon said:
Yes height is attractive but no it is not 95% of the reason a girl would talk to a guy.
Tall, to me, is an added plus not a must have. Seeing a tall guy doesn't blind me from all reason as if I was hypontized by the tallness of said male.
But, yes, tall men are appealing but that doesn't give tall men an excuse to be dirty/ugly with bad BO, and a terrible personality. Also if your teeth are bad, that is a turn off and your height can't hide that.
SolidusDave
Member
Londa said:
But they might be harder to see from this distance
YuriLowell
Member
How does girl age feel about beards?
SolidusDave said:
WHAT. This still matters if you are tall. And relative height is more important than height. I'm perfectly fine with someone who is the same height as me or like an inch taller, it's only when they're smaller than me that it starts to become less appealing. I know tall, attractive girls who are with shorter, attractive guys though! So obviously it's not the same for everyone. But no, height in itself I don't see as a turn on. If a guy has all of the bolded things and is tall I'd be just as turned off by it.
freenudemacusers
Member
chicks dig our darker complexion and latino ways. Just roll with it.clearacell said:
Escape Goat
Member
Entropia said:
You found a chubby chaser. Time to eat pizza.
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