LadyGAF Advises ManGAF

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Ok Lady-Gaf 2 questions unrelated to dancing.

1) Is there a nice way to tell a girl you don't want to talk to her every fucking day? That being on the phone every night is annoying?

2) Is there a nice way to tell a girl she is crap in bed? (note: ive dropped hints about spicing it up, bought sex toys, left karma sutra type books lying around etc already.)
 
I kind of hate clubbing. I'd dance though, but I hate hip hop and etc, and I would think most nightclubs play that.

I also don't wanna get shot.
 
Unicorn said:
Welp, there you have it.

GAF would sooner go gay than dance with women.

Forever Alone-GAF you mean.

I don't know a lot of guys that actually like dancing (I don't) but it's a good excuse to hold and chat up women you've only just met, something I can see socially-awkward guys being incredibly afraid of doing.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
Ok Lady-Gaf 2 questions unrelated to dancing.

1) Is there a nice way to tell a girl you don't want to talk to her every fucking day? That being on the phone every night is annoying?

2) Is there a nice way to tell a girl she is crap in bed? (note: ive dropped hints about spicing it up, bought sex toys, left karma sutra type books lying around etc already.)

For number 2, why not fix the individual things she's doing wrong as she's doing them by saying like "hey, try _____" or "wanna _____"? If you react favourably to that maybe she'll clue in and just doing things in that manner from then on? Seems like it'd be easier than telling her she isn't good in bed.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
Ok Lady-Gaf 2 questions unrelated to dancing.

1) Is there a nice way to tell a girl you don't want to talk to her every fucking day? That being on the phone every night is annoying?

2) Is there a nice way to tell a girl she is crap in bed? (note: ive dropped hints about spicing it up, bought sex toys, left karma sutra type books lying around etc already.)

1) Stop answering the phone? Is she your girlfriend or your friend? "As much as I love talking to you, I have to go sort my action figures by height and strength."

2) What's wrong exactly? Does she just lie there? Ask her if she wouldn't mind trying some other positions (ask her outside of sexy times because then you can discuss what she's interested in too - and it may just lead to sexy times which is always nice). Does she give bad oral? That's your fault for not teling her what you like (use your words or guide her). Is she self-conscious/does she not know how to enjoy herself? That's a whole other issue.

I think you need to be more specific.
 
So why is it when you ask a girl her age she always asks you how old do you think she is? Seriously, if you answer it, it never turns out well unless you pretty much guess they're exact age. Why do you always ask this if you never like the answer? It's literally happened every time I've asked and it always seems like such a setup.
 
I don't mean to offend any girls in this thread, but it's probably pointless to ask any girl for advice on how to pick up. In my experience they give the worst advice - what girls want in guys is not what they say they want. Sometimes it's the exact opposite, and they don't even know it. People are just not very self aware in general - but especially when it comes to who they're attracted to and not attracted to.

Best just to ask that guy in your group who pulls all the time. In every group of friends there's one. Ask that guy!

I'm most definitely not that guy!
 
Ok LadyGAF:

How do I go beyond the "one and done" curse? I have dated several women this year and all of them have expressed interest in a second date. None of them have followed through with it.

If they gave me some feedback on how I could improve that would be one thing, but it's frustrating when they just ignore me after that initial date.

Some background in case you're interested. I'm a quiet person. I used to lack self-confidence, but that's not the case anymore. Now I'm still quiet, but it's just in a collected way. I don't say much, but interject during conversations. I tend to get along best with women who talk a lot and just want someone to relate to. I'm afraid my quietness makes me come off as "boring" to women.

I am also not one to initiate physical contact, and I think women want me to do that first.
 
thisis4neogaf said:
1) Stop answering the phone? Is she your girlfriend or your friend? "As much as I love talking to you, I have to go sort my action figures by height and strength."

2) What's wrong exactly? Does she just lie there? Ask her if she wouldn't mind trying some other positions (ask her outside of sexy times because then you can discuss what she's interested in too - and it may just lead to sexy times which is always nice). Does she give bad oral? That's your fault for not teling her what you like (use your words or guide her). Is she self-conscious/does she not know how to enjoy herself? That's a whole other issue.

I think you need to be more specific.

She is my Girl. If don't answer or tell her Im not in the mood to talk, she throws a hissy fit. Ive explained many times I don't like being on the phone everyday, but she never listens

2) well...im the like the second guy she has slept with and her first sexual boyfriend (she lost her V on a one night stand with a friend) She claims its too painful to try different positions and sex never lasts longer than 10 mins ( not trying to brag but im one of those guys...) She has never given me head except if you count the time I put my dick in her mouth in my sleep (yeah I was shocked too). She is a really confident girl outside of the bedroom, she just doesn't give sex the same level of importance I do. She is no insecure wallflower, believe you me.

ikkemenx said:
For number 2, why not fix the individual things she's doing wrong as she's doing them by saying like "hey, try _____" or "wanna _____"? If you react favourably to that maybe she'll clue in and just doing things in that manner from then on? Seems like it'd be easier than telling her she isn't good in bed.

I have tried that she just says "yes ok, when im ready i might suprise you" and then proceeds to forget about it. Its been a bloody year. Im just not used to such crappy sex and for so long to boot.
 
Zaraki_Kenpachi said:
So why is it when you ask a girl her age she always asks you how old do you think she is? Seriously, if you answer it, it never turns out well unless you pretty much guess they're exact age. Why do you always ask this if you never like the answer? It's literally happened every time I've asked and it always seems like such a setup.

I can confess to doing this, though I don't think I know what you mean about it "not turning well" (do they freak out or something?). I'm genuinely curious as to what age someone would guess, and will want to know regardless of whether or not the answer is one I'd like. Would prefer to have the honest answer than to not have asked at all. Either way, the answers I've received are so radically different that I don't put too much consideration into it anymore.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
Ok Lady-Gaf 2 questions unrelated to dancing.

1) Is there a nice way to tell a girl you don't want to talk to her every fucking day? That being on the phone every night is annoying?

2) Is there a nice way to tell a girl she is crap in bed? (note: ive dropped hints about spicing it up, bought sex toys, left karma sutra type books lying around etc already.)

1) Just don't answer phone? When she asks you why you haven't been picking up: "Oh. Left my cellphone [upstairs/in car/in jacket] and didn't hear it." or "Was busy doing something at the time." Otherwise: "Eh. Didn't feeling like picking up the phone all day."
If she's just a needy girl, then sucks to be you! xD I'd just tell her she's being needy. Haha.

2) Give her more direction in bed. "Yeah, I really like it when you ______." or "Move over a bit to the _______." More positive reinforcement (moan/swear in delight/whatever it is you do) when she gets something right. If she's doing it wrong, give her direction, then reinforce when it works.
 
Inanna said:
When has he ever made any sense? :|

They never will, all he does is troll.


ikkemenx said:
I can confess to doing this, though I don't think I know what you mean about it "not turning well" (do they freak out or something?). I'm genuinely curious as to what age someone would guess, and will want to know regardless of whether or not the answer is one I'd like. Would prefer to have the honest answer than to not have asked at all. Either way, the answers I've received are so radically different that I don't put too much consideration into it anymore.

They get grumpy that I guess too old/young. It's usually only the ones who ask who get mad.
 
Zaraki_Kenpachi said:
So why is it when you ask a girl her age she always asks you how old do you think she is? Seriously, if you answer it, it never turns out well unless you pretty much guess they're exact age. Why do you always ask this if you never like the answer? It's literally happened every time I've asked and it always seems like such a setup.
You dont ever ask a girl her age or weight.
 
Prax said:
1) Just don't answer phone? When she asks you why you haven't been picking up: "Oh. Left my cellphone [upstairs/in car/in jacket] and didn't hear it." or "Was busy doing something at the time." Otherwise: "Eh. Didn't feeling like picking up the phone all day."
If she's just a needy girl, then sucks to be you! xD I'd just tell her she's being needy. Haha.

"then why didn't you call me back? you knew I was gonna ring you"

" im not being needy, your just being miserable and difficult"

Facepalm.jpg
 
Pinko Marx said:
You dont ever ask a girl her age or weight.


I always ask though, but the way i do is asking how old they were when an event happened , dat loop hole :P

as for weight, i messed up a relationship asking before, never again haha
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
2) well...im the like the second guy she has slept with and her first sexual boyfriend (she lost her V on a one night stand with a friend) She claims its too painful to try different positions and sex never lasts longer than 10 mins ( not trying to brag but im one of those guys...) She has never given me head except if you count the time I put my dick in her mouth in my sleep (yeah I was shocked too). She is a really confident girl outside of the bedroom, she just doesn't give sex the same level of importance I do. She is no insecure wallflower, believe you me
Have you ever gone done on her? If you haven't then I can understand why she is a bit hesitant on doing it for you. Maybe if you do that she'd want to reciprocate, and when she does she might find that she actually really likes doing it.
 
Inanna said:
Have you ever gone done on her? If you haven't then I can understand why she is a bit hesitant on doing it for you. Maybe if you do that she'd want to reciprocate, and when she does she might find that she actually really likes doing it.

yeah used to all the time. Not as much now because she doesn't seem to like it much and she doesn't shave down there. Im not getting hair in my mouth.
 
I can't tell you how easy it is to meet and/or impress girls if you know how to dance.

That being said, I actually met my gf after I quit dancing. lol
 
Zaraki_Kenpachi said:
:lol Wut.
what.gif


I thought what blame space meant was kind of obvious.
 
One last question for Lady-Gaf.

In a clubbing situation, what do you really think of guys who are there alone?

Id love to go out to some different places, but if a club isn't "black enough" my male friends aren't interested.

when I got out with my female friends, I never have fun because I have to watch over them instead of having a good time, plus its awkward if I want to approach a girl.

If i was to go somewhere different, id have to go there on my own.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
One last question for Lady-Gaf.

In a clubbing situation, what do you really think of guys who are there alone?

Id love to go out to some different places, but if a club isn't "black enough" my male friends aren't interested.

when I got out with my female friends, I never have fun because I have to watch over them instead of having a good time, plus its awkward if I want to approach a girl.

If i was to go somewhere different, id have to go there on my own.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DHl6ncd1s0
First thing that popped into my head, reading that.

On a related note, nothing gets you pussy like a Gravy Train!!!! concert.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
"then why didn't you call me back? you knew I was gonna ring you"

" im not being needy, your just being miserable and difficult"

Facepalm.jpg

"Eh. I didn't feel like talking that day."

Hahaha.. Sorry man, I'd just end up pissing her off too. I am not good with this stuff either. I also get bored with talking every day and do not understand girls that need to do it. >_>
Doesn't she have better things to do than call you every day? She's probably just bored. (Or needy.)
 
Unicorn said:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DHl6ncd1s0
First thing that popped into my head, reading that.

the weirdness of the internet never ceases to amaze me.

Prax said:
"Eh. I didn't feel like talking that day."

Hahaha.. Sorry man, I'd just end up pissing her off too. I am not good with this stuff either. I also get bored with talking every day and do not understand girls that need to do it. >_>
Doesn't she have better things to do than call you every day? She's probably just bored. (Or needy.)

I dunno what to do. im just so fed up with her in general, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. Every other week we seem to finally break up, for her to ring the day after, apologise and then carry on like nothing ever happened.

I know im a sucker, but I care about her alot and the way she never seems to give up is quite endearing.

thanks for the advice anyway.


thisis4neogaf said:
1) She doesn't respect your choice to not talk on the phone? You're not required to talk to someone on the phone every night - why doesn't she call her girlfriends? You need a compromise with her - you talk 3 times a week or she comes over/you go over instead of having phone conversations.

2) Dude... don't stick your dick in her mouth when she can't consent - unless you've discussed it beforehand.

Are you big? You sound long/wide. If you're long, stop poking her cervix. If you're wide, she needs to be extremely wet before you slip it in. If you can last that long, then you can spend your time with foreplay. Make sex about enjoying each other's bodies instead of having the goal be to orgasm. If it hurts when you slip in a finger while she's very wet, she may have an infection. If she's wet but doesn't seem into it, she's probably not sexually attracted to you anymore... or she's self-conscious (just because she's confident when she's fully clothed doesn't mean she's comfortable engaging in an activity with someone where she's quite inexperienced).

Has she always been like this? It honestly sounds like she's not sexually attracted to you anymore but she still loves you. You should ask her. If sex is important to you but not her, you're not compatible.

And for both questions, if she doesn't want to work through these with you, do you really want to be with her? If you can't work through your problems together - if you're the only one willing to go the distance - how do you think you'll get through serious life shit together? :/


1) she doesn't get along with many of her friends anymore, they have kinda drifted apart. She just talks to me and stays at home every night. She is fcuking boring. She doesn't like to travel much so I see her once a week at best. Id go to see her but after a whole year Ive never once had a invitation.

2) I would never have done it consciously, like I said, I did it in my sleep. According to her, her head was resting on my navel, and I pushed her head down on my member. Ive been known to do all tyoes of weird stuff in my sleep, but nothing quite like that.

I don't even care about the orgasm side of things, not many girls can get me to that point. But even foreplay is a problem because she is ticklish and doesnt like me messing around with her body too much. There are few spots that im allowed to mess with but thats it. Im a quite attentive lover, so her behaviour is kinda bizarre.

She has always been like this from day one so i don't think its a feelings thing. Likewise, its not so much that she isn't into sex or is self conscious :- she is the only girl ive met that isn't shy to masturbate in front of me. Its just once she gets to a certain point, she wants to stop. Im not huge by any means, and I never put the full length in, but even then she complains about it hurts after a while, even with lube.

As for do i want be with her.....I dunno. I care for her and she means alot to me, but I couldnt seem myself settling down or getting married to her. on the other hand, there is nothing wrong with her as a person and she is a cool girl to be with when she isnt moaning.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
She is my Girl. If don't answer or tell her Im not in the mood to talk, she throws a hissy fit. Ive explained many times I don't like being on the phone everyday, but she never listens

2) well...im the like the second guy she has slept with and her first sexual boyfriend (she lost her V on a one night stand with a friend) She claims its too painful to try different positions and sex never lasts longer than 10 mins ( not trying to brag but im one of those guys...) She has never given me head except if you count the time I put my dick in her mouth in my sleep (yeah I was shocked too). She is a really confident girl outside of the bedroom, she just doesn't give sex the same level of importance I do. She is no insecure wallflower, believe you me.

1) She doesn't respect your choice to not talk on the phone? You're not required to talk to someone on the phone every night - why doesn't she call her girlfriends? You need a compromise with her - you talk 3 times a week or she comes over/you go over instead of having phone conversations.

2) Dude... don't stick your dick in her mouth when she can't consent - unless you've discussed it beforehand.

Are you big? You sound long/wide. If you're long, stop poking her cervix. If you're wide, she needs to be extremely wet before you slip it in. If you can last that long, then you can spend your time with foreplay. Make sex about enjoying each other's bodies instead of having the goal be to orgasm. If it hurts when you slip in a finger while she's very wet, she may have an infection. If she's wet but doesn't seem into it, she's probably not sexually attracted to you anymore... or she's self-conscious (just because she's confident when she's fully clothed doesn't mean she's comfortable engaging in an activity with someone where she's quite inexperienced).

Has she always been like this? It honestly sounds like she's not sexually attracted to you anymore but she still loves you. You should ask her. If sex is important to you but not her, you're not compatible.

And for both questions, if she doesn't want to work through these with you, do you really want to be with her? If you can't work through your problems together - if you're the only one willing to go the distance - how do you think you'll get through serious life shit together? :/
 
Prax said:
1) Just don't answer phone? When she asks you why you haven't been picking up: "Oh. Left my cellphone [upstairs/in car/in jacket] and didn't hear it." or "Was busy doing something at the time." Otherwise: "Eh. Didn't feeling like picking up the phone all day."
If she's just a needy girl, then sucks to be you! xD I'd just tell her she's being needy. Haha.
Sorry, but I don't buy it. Show me a significant-other who is that blase about not returning their calls. Maybe if you've been married for 20 years, first. And making up excuses? That's just fuel for the impending fire.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
2) well...im the like the second guy she has slept with and her first sexual boyfriend (she lost her V on a one night stand with a friend) She claims its too painful to try different positions and sex never lasts longer than 10 mins ( not trying to brag but im one of those guys...) She has never given me head except if you count the time I put my dick in her mouth in my sleep (yeah I was shocked too). She is a really confident girl outside of the bedroom, she just doesn't give sex the same level of importance I do. She is no insecure wallflower, believe you me.

If you're girthy ,Lots of foreplay and lube, that's it really. The vagina will grow to accommodate any girth after awhile, even if painful at first. It took my girl a while before see became used to me and it didn't leave her sore afterwards (still can't pull off a quickie though). As for length, um yea, some positions wont work out at all unless you don't put it in all the way.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
One last question for Lady-Gaf.

In a clubbing situation, what do you really think of guys who are there alone?

Id love to go out to some different places, but if a club isn't "black enough" my male friends aren't interested.

when I got out with my female friends, I never have fun because I have to watch over them instead of having a good time, plus its awkward if I want to approach a girl.

If i was to go somewhere different, id have to go there on my own.
"Watch over them"? As in cock block guys that aren't out with a group of women or treat presumably adult women like they are children? So you're like the only dude that's with this group of girls? That sounds just a little weird.
 
I've had a few girls drag me out to the dance floor to "teach" me how to dance and it basically amounted to public dry humping. Not really my style. Just really awkward and makes me look/feel ridiculous. I can see the draw to a real dance style, but I don't really get the appeal of bar dancing.
 
ckohler said:
Sorry, but I don't buy it. Show me a significant-other who is that blase about not returning their calls. Maybe if you've been married for 20 years, first. And making up excuses? That's just fuel for the impending fire.
Ahahhaa.. ~!
Me! I would do those things for example! That's right. I'd be the insensitive/blase person in the relationship! So awesome.

ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
1) she doesn't get along with many of her friends anymore, they have kinda drifted apart. She just talks to me and stays at home every night. She is fcuking boring. She doesn't like to travel much so I see her once a week at best. Id go to see her but after a whole year Ive never once had a invitation.

2) I would never have done it consciously, like I said, I did it in my sleep. According to her, her head was resting on my navel, and I pushed her head down on my member. Ive been known to do all tyoes of weird stuff in my sleep, but nothing quite like that.

I don't even care about the orgasm side of things, not many girls can get me to that point. But even foreplay is a problem because she is ticklish and doesnt like me messing around with her body too much. There are few spots that im allowed to mess with but thats it. Im a quite attentive lover, so her behaviour is kinda bizarre.

She has always been like this from day one so i don't think its a feelings thing. Likewise, its not so much that she isn't into sex or is self conscious :- she is the only girl ive met that isn't shy to masturbate in front of me. Its just once she gets to a certain point, she wants to stop. Im not huge by any means, and I never put the full length in, but even then she complains about it hurts after a while, even with lube.

As for do i want be with her.....I dunno. I care for her and she means alot to me, but I couldnt seem myself settling down or getting married to her. on the other hand, there is nothing wrong with her as a person and she is a cool girl to be with when she isnt moaning.
But it also sounds like she's going through some issues and she needs a lot of support.. and you are the only one around. Not going out much and losing all her friends? That sounds awful. Maybe you should just invite yourself over more and take her out. Otherwise, she needs a new hobby other than being in a relationship.

As for the sex stuff. Maybe she needs to be clitorally stimulated at the same time as intercourse to get her more relaxed? I know some girls who were kind of on the small side that needed that, otherwise sex was not enjoyable for them. I guess as long as she enjoys it and gets off, if you say that you getting off is difficult for most girls to do anyway. Could just be that 10+ minutes is just too long for her and she has not the endurance!

Not going to tell you to end it with her, but if she is constantly annoying you, bores you, and can't fulfill you sexually then.. there are many issues in this relationship, despite how endearing she can be.
 
cooljeanius said:
What does LadyGAF think of guys "White Knighting" females?

I've been called one, on this forum no less. And not because I think women are frail but because I posted some feminist opinions. The term is thrown around far too often at men who respect women and defend their personhood. Now of course there are the creepy worship types who think we're frail goddesses. But the term is rarely used solely for them.
 
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