LadyGAF Advises ManGAF

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Tkawsome said:
I've had a few girls drag me out to the dance floor to "teach" me how to dance and it basically amounted to public dry humping. Not really my style. Just really awkward and makes me look/feel ridiculous. I can see the draw to a real dance style, but I don't really get the appeal of bar dancing.
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What's interesting enough though, a lot of girls can't dance. I'm not saying I can dance but the girls I've danced with before only care if you dance with them.

I don't know, maybe it's easier for me to get out there because I don't care what they think about me.
 
Plywood said:
Well do your boobs make you walk funny?
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Nope, probably because they are not between my legs, and I like wearing fitting bras so they don't jiggle or move around too much when I walk or run.
 
Marius_ said:
Huh, how do balls make you walk funny? Change your type of underwear
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My underwear is fine, now the boys, the boys are huge!

I was joking.

But when it's hot they are a bother... I've said enough.
 
Devolution said:
Other things make us walk funny (or at least me).
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56fk5.jpg


Oh you Devo.
 
Prax said:
Ahahhaa.. ~!
Me! I would do those things for example! That's right. I'd be the insensitive/blase person in the relationship! So awesome.


But it also sounds like she's going through some issues and she needs a lot of support.. and you are the only one around. Not going out much and losing all her friends? That sounds awful. Maybe you should just invite yourself over more and take her out. Otherwise, she needs a new hobby other than being in a relationship.

As for the sex stuff. Maybe she needs to be clitorally stimulated at the same time as intercourse to get her more relaxed? I know some girls who were kind of on the small side that needed that, otherwise sex was not enjoyable for them. I guess as long as she enjoys it and gets off, if you say that you getting off is difficult for most girls to do anyway. Could just be that 10+ minutes is just too long for her and she has not the endurance!

Not going to tell you to end it with her, but if she is constantly annoying you, bores you, and can't fulfill you sexually then.. there are many issues in this relationship, despite how endearing she can be.
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Yeah. in fairness to her, whe have long periods where for whatever reason, we dont have any sex at all (this one is near enough to 3 months) so I just makes everything worse we we do start...

I dont know if im going to finish with her, yet. Im going to have a long talk with her next week (not on the phone lol) and see if we can resolve things. If not, I think its better we go our separate ways for good.

once again, thanks for your input.
 
I can't dance so I tried to impress my date. She laughed and so did everyone else. I didn't really care and still did it, but, she started turning red and decided to leave. I asked her what was wrong, and she's like "You're embarrassing me. You look like you're 12. Your attempts to impress me are pathetic". ):

Do looks truly matter or am I going after the wrong type of girls? I don't dress well because I have no clothes I can afford, I'm well groomed and smell good, but, I'm not very attractive, infact I'm down right ugly, Ive got a belly, and i'm tall with a bad haircut. I am fairly confident and talking to a random girl is easy to me. Problem is few girls are willing to talk to me without being creeped out. I can see it in their facial expressions, most are just like "oh please go away you creep" and it's pretty offending.

Any advice or am i pretty much doomed? For the record, I've had many, many dates before. Most were in HS, I've had a few girls I've stayed with but they always end up with mental problems, or i mess up the relation.

I also am a 22 year old virgin. that's probably another kicker in the whole getting a date. I think that would probably instantly turn off a girl if she found out I was.
 
njr said:
What's interesting enough though, a lot of girls can't dance. I'm not saying I can dance but the girls I've danced with before only care if you dance with them.

I don't know, maybe it's easier for me to get out there because I don't care what they think about me.
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I'm not the type to care what other people think. I've been laughed at every time I tried to dance with someone but I just shrug my shoulders. Girls don't exactly like being laughed at though, so it's never ended well.
 
AlimNassor said:
I can't dance so I tried to impress my date. She laughed and so did everyone else. I didn't really care and still did it, but, she started turning red and decided to leave. I asked her what was wrong, and she's like "You're embarrassing me. You look like you're 12. Your attempts to impress me are pathetic". ):

Do looks truly matter or am I going after the wrong type of girls? I don't dress well because I have no clothes I can afford, I'm well groomed and smell good, but, I'm not very attractive, infact I'm down right ugly, Ive got a belly, and i'm tall with a bad haircut. I am fairly confident and talking to a random girl is easy to me. Problem is few girls are willing to talk to me without being creeped out. I can see it in their facial expressions, most are just like "oh please go away you creep" and it's pretty offending.

Any advice or am i pretty much doomed? For the record, I've had many, many dates before. Most were in HS, I've had a few girls I've stayed with but they always end up with mental problems, or i mess up the relation.

I also am a 22 year old virgin. that's probably another kicker in the whole getting a date. I think that would probably instantly turn off a girl if she found out I was.
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How do you approach women? Give me a scenario.


Chiave said:
Any girl who says "looks" or "size" doesn't matter is probably lying imo.
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Looks matter but if you're not particularly attractive your best bet is to acquire a really funny interesting personality. If you can't charm her with looks, you have to be interesting and engaging, someone she wants to get to know. You can't be the mysterious tall dark handsome guy without the handsome. So socialize more.
 
Devolution said:
How do you approach women? Give me a scenario.
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If she's alone, I usually strike up a chat related to something. Just a casual very friendly sorta thing. If she's interested in more, I ask for a number or facebook to talk more or maybe over coffee or something. Like last week this cute girl was in class. I was sitting next to her. During break, i asked if I could see her notes. We began talking about the class, and just random stuff and the entire time she had a look of disgust on her face. After class, I heard her on the phone talking to a friend about this creepy guy who tried talking to her. I don't understand how I'm creepy, maybe it's my looks? :/
 
Chiave said:
Nah, I know fat and ugly people who get laid. You don't need anything special.
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So.. you are saying.. just lower your standards or prepare to pay! Some desperate girls exist!
 
Chiave said:
Nah, I know fat and ugly people who get laid. You don't need anything special.
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Everyone can get laid I was talking about acquiring a girlfriend.



AlimNassor said:
If she's alone, I usually strike up a chat related to something. Just a casual very friendly sorta thing. If she's interested in more, I ask for a number or facebook to talk more or maybe over coffee or something. Like last week this cute girl was in class. I was sitting next to her. During break, i asked if I could see her notes. We began talking about the class, and just random stuff and the entire time she had a look of disgust on her face. After class, I heard her on the phone talking to a friend about this creepy guy who tried talking to her. I don't understand how I'm creepy, maybe it's my looks? :/
Click to expand...

Sometimes guys, especially taller bigger ones don't realize how intimidating/imposing they can be. Or maybe there is something in your manner of speech that unnerves them. Do you have any gal pals? If so talk to them and ask them to be honest with you about what might be creeping other women out. They might not be scared but could pinpoint something that might be making strangers nervous.
 
Chiave said:
Nah, I know fat and ugly people who get laid. You don't need anything special.
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Yup, poster sounds down on himself which is often picked up by other people, especially so in these situations (you sound insincere and forced even if that is not your intent) .
 
AlimNassor said:
If she's alone, I usually strike up a chat related to something. Just a casual very friendly sorta thing. If she's interested in more, I ask for a number or facebook to talk more or maybe over coffee or something. Like last week this cute girl was in class. I was sitting next to her. During break, i asked if I could see her notes. We began talking about the class, and just random stuff and the entire time she had a look of disgust on her face. After class, I heard her on the phone talking to a friend about this creepy guy who tried talking to her. I don't understand how I'm creepy, maybe it's my looks? :/
Click to expand...


Every guy is creepy if she isn't attracted to him. Don't stress about it.
 
Two questions for LadyGAF in seriousness.

One: Is it really that impressive when a guy cooks? Some of my friend's female friends seem to be genuinely impressed/amazed when they find out it's a guy that baked the bread cooling on the counter, or the pizza that smells so good, etc. I told my friend once that I had pizza I made myself for dinner, and her immediate response was "oh, frozen pizza?" And I was like no, homemade, and she was shocked. I didn't think cooking/baking was that big a deal: you just follow the instructions/recipe. Doesn't seem to hard to me.

Two: On a more personal note, I already went through this in Dating-Age but wanted a girl's perspective. Summary: I hit it off with a girl, but I was moving two hours away. In a conversation, she said we should get together before I moved. The first attempt at plans fell through, but after I tried to get in touch with her twice and she never responded, period. It's been a month and I've moved. Would it be awkward to get in touch with her again, or is it more likely that I'm never going to get a response from her ever? I'm trying to weigh the likelihood of her suddenly losing interest in me completely despite chemistry vs. her feeling awkward about responding because she waited too long to get back to me.
 
Chiave said:
Any girl who says "looks" or "size" doesn't matter is probably lying imo.
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Man, looks matter for everyone. I'm not saying people are shallow as a whole, but I'd like to think that everyone has a sort of "requirements" list in their head, some more lengthy than others; people have tastes and things that they distaste as far as the opposite sex goes.

Chiave said:
Nah, I know fat and ugly people who get laid. You don't need anything special.
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It's all about that self confidence.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
Every guy is creepy if she isn't attracted to him. Don't stress about it.
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Not true at all. I have met several men whom I have no physical attraction to at school that befriend me without issue.
 
Incendiary said:
Two questions for LadyGAF in seriousness.

One: Is it really that impressive when a guy cooks? Some of my friend's female friends seem to be genuinely impressed/amazed when they find out it's a guy that baked the bread cooling on the counter, or the pizza that smells so good, etc. I told my friend once that I had pizza I made myself for dinner, and her immediate response was "oh, frozen pizza?" And I was like no, homemade, and she was shocked. I didn't think cooking/baking was that big a deal: you just follow the instructions/recipe. Doesn't seem to hard to me.

Two: On a more personal note, I already went through this in Dating-Age but wanted a girl's perspective. Summary: I hit it off with a girl, but I was moving two hours away. In a conversation, she said we should get together before I moved. The first attempt at plans fell through, but after I tried to get in touch with her twice and she never responded, period. It's been a month and I've moved. Would it be awkward to get in touch with her again, or is it more likely that I'm never going to get a response from her ever? I'm trying to weigh the likelihood of her suddenly losing interest in me completely despite chemistry vs. her feeling awkward about responding because she waited too long to get back to me.
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1) Guys that can cook are awesome because they can entertain their lady. And what lady doesn't like to eat delicious food? Good food is good food! Aren't guys impressed by girls that can cook well?

2) She's probably no longer interested, but give it a try anyway? What have you got to lose?
 
AlimNassor said:
I can't dance so I tried to impress my date. She laughed and so did everyone else. I didn't really care and still did it, but, she started turning red and decided to leave. I asked her what was wrong, and she's like "You're embarrassing me. You look like you're 12. Your attempts to impress me are pathetic". ):

Do looks truly matter or am I going after the wrong type of girls? I don't dress well because I have no clothes I can afford, I'm well groomed and smell good, but, I'm not very attractive, infact I'm down right ugly, Ive got a belly, and i'm tall with a bad haircut. I am fairly confident and talking to a random girl is easy to me. Problem is few girls are willing to talk to me without being creeped out. I can see it in their facial expressions, most are just like "oh please go away you creep" and it's pretty offending.

Any advice or am i pretty much doomed? For the record, I've had many, many dates before. Most were in HS, I've had a few girls I've stayed with but they always end up with mental problems, or i mess up the relation.

I also am a 22 year old virgin. that's probably another kicker in the whole getting a date. I think that would probably instantly turn off a girl if she found out I was.
Click to expand...
I think something people don't say before they give advice like "just get out there and dance" is "oh yeah, first you have to be an attractive person."

In the end though, it's not as bad as you make it out to be. I know I don't care what a woman's face looks like at all provided everything is symmetrical and in working order and there isn't hair or some shit on it. If a woman is in decent shape and is a pleasant conversationalist, that's all I need. I figure most women think of men in the same way.

So get your ass in shape.
 
Devolution said:
Everyone can get laid I was talking about acquiring a girlfriend.





Sometimes guys, especially taller bigger ones don't realize how intimidating/imposing they can be. Or maybe there is something in your manner of speech that unnerves them. Do you have any gal pals? If so talk to them and ask them to be honest with you about what might be creeping other women out. They might not be scared but could pinpoint something that might be making strangers nervous.
Click to expand...

I'm not tall, 5'10 isn't very tall. I talk very casually, it's not too difficult for me to talk to random people. I don't have any. i used to in HS. I don't get into peoples faces, or sound desperate. When she rejected me, I was like "ah, that's fine. Anyways, thank you for letting me copy your notes". She just rolled her eyes and said okay". I don't she was nervous, she just seemed seriously disgusted by my presence.
 
FleckSplat said:
Ok LadyGAF:

How do I go beyond the "one and done" curse? I have dated several women this year and all of them have expressed interest in a second date. None of them have followed through with it.

If they gave me some feedback on how I could improve that would be one thing, but it's frustrating when they just ignore me after that initial date.

Some background in case you're interested. I'm a quiet person. I used to lack self-confidence, but that's not the case anymore. Now I'm still quiet, but it's just in a collected way. I don't say much, but interject during conversations. I tend to get along best with women who talk a lot and just want someone to relate to. I'm afraid my quietness makes me come off as "boring" to women.

I am also not one to initiate physical contact, and I think women want me to do that first.
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Wow, even GAF doesn't respond to me. lol.
 
AlimNassor said:
I'm not tall, 5'10 isn't very tall. I talk very casually, it's not too difficult for me to talk to random people. I don't have any. i used to in HS. I don't get into peoples faces, or sound desperate. When she rejected me, I was like "ah, that's fine. Anyways, thank you for letting me copy your notes". She just rolled her eyes and said okay". I don't she was nervous, she just seemed seriously disgusted by my presence.
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So assuming you do nothing wrong, it sounds like you're just hitting on assholes. Get in shape, get some gal pals, you'll be set.
 
FleckSplat said:
Wow, even GAF doesn't respond to me. lol.
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I'm still going through the thread. There's only so many of us and we're not on call for these posts. Chill out. Ugh sorry about the double post.
 
AlimNassor said:
I'm not tall, 5'10 isn't very tall. I talk very casually, it's not too difficult for me to talk to random people. I don't have any. i used to in HS. I don't get into peoples faces, or sound desperate. When she rejected me, I was like "ah, that's fine. Anyways, thank you for letting me copy your notes". She just rolled her eyes and said okay". I don't she was nervous, she just seemed seriously disgusted by my presence.
Click to expand...
Maybe she is just a jerk? :l Sounds like it!

Image is a big thing for people, but if you say your clothes are clean and you have good hygiene, that's a good base to build off of already. Otherwise, getting in shape and a better haircut could do you a lot of good, and not just attracting-girls-wise.
 
FleckSplat said:
Ok LadyGAF:

How do I go beyond the "one and done" curse? I have dated several women this year and all of them have expressed interest in a second date. None of them have followed through with it.

If they gave me some feedback on how I could improve that would be one thing, but it's frustrating when they just ignore me after that initial date.

Some background in case you're interested. I'm a quiet person. I used to lack self-confidence, but that's not the case anymore. Now I'm still quiet, but it's just in a collected way. I don't say much, but interject during conversations. I tend to get along best with women who talk a lot and just want someone to relate to. I'm afraid my quietness makes me come off as "boring" to women.

I am also not one to initiate physical contact, and I think women want me to do that first.
Click to expand...

Sounds like you know what you're doing wrong. What am I here for?
 
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