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LGBThread |OT4| We're (still) Here! We're (still) Queer!
- Thread starter RatskyWatsky
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umop_3pisdn
Member
It would be better if it were a special kind of idiocy, and not an (apparently) common kind
Blood Diamonds
Banned
I was just thinking... I have a lot of people I don't care about on Facebook (Including distant relatives like ugh) So what's the point of coming out on FB? Too much to deal with tbh, I already came out to my best friend anyway (Who is the one that I make a "cute couple" with ughhh) So I guess there's nothing to worry about, don't really care about the other girls lol.
Plus I was thinking that maybe I should come out to my Family first...
Plus I was thinking that maybe I should come out to my Family first...
Critical self-reflection is a criminally underused resource.
The vast majority of the world's problems could be solved if people actually thought to take advantage of it.
It's not common if it's something happening between minoritiesIt would be better if it were a special kind of idiocy, and not an (apparently) common kind
Otherwise it'd be good old vanilla idiocy.umop_3pisdn
Member
It's annoying but I think you're reading too much into it. Realizing that you're gay doesn't really require that much introspection, and even if it does require a fair bit that requirement doesn't incline you towards it it just provides an opportunity to exercise it, so if you're not inclined you're probably likely to do only as much as is immediately necessary
It's not common if it's something happening between minorities
...It was a joke about it being too frequent, and 'common' in that respect.
michaeltraps
Member
Seriously. I also hate it when straight people think they're taking the "gays" side - "Oh, but you're not bi, right? Those guys are so greedy! LOLZ"
There's an OkCupid question "Would you date a bisexual?" No joke, at least 90% of the profiles I come across answer "no" to that question. It drives me absolutely insane. The additional commentary blows my mind even more - "I don't want to have to compete with men AND women."
umop_3pisdn
Member
I'm like inordinately attracted to bisexual dudes, have no idea why.
Re: Luciano Costa
<3!! Once I sent him a message at Facebook related to something about his dog, and he actually replied!! :O!!!
Re: Queer
Don't use the word, but mostly because in spanish the only word around here that's not considered as offensive by some is..."gay"; which is not spanish anyway.
Re: Bi
Yeah,. I agree that it's stupid. I guess mostly because of false ideas and assumptions based on their own experiences. An their constant doubt that if they're wit ha bi guy, that he may be thinking about a woman while been with him...etc. But, well..you can't spell assumption without ass.
Re: Victor
Sounds like you'll be and feel better by moving to Colombia. At least as a starting point, with your dad close by and still close enough to your mother. Of course, always be careful.
<3!! Once I sent him a message at Facebook related to something about his dog, and he actually replied!! :O!!!
Plus he has a great body and butt too!!
Re: Queer
Don't use the word, but mostly because in spanish the only word around here that's not considered as offensive by some is..."gay"; which is not spanish anyway.
Re: Bi
Yeah,. I agree that it's stupid. I guess mostly because of false ideas and assumptions based on their own experiences. An their constant doubt that if they're wit ha bi guy, that he may be thinking about a woman while been with him...etc. But, well..you can't spell assumption without ass.
Re: Victor
Sounds like you'll be and feel better by moving to Colombia. At least as a starting point, with your dad close by and still close enough to your mother. Of course, always be careful.
umop_3pisdn
Member
This is weird, I can't tell if I'm hypomanic right now or just feeling more energetic than normal lol.
User 73706
Banned
Two out of two genders can't be wrong!
I think it sucks that bisexual people get a bum rap, and I think it's largely due to the common belief that most gay men tend to come out as "bi" before admitting that they're just straight up "gay." Something about it just feels safer.
I also think skepticism of bisexuality is product of the fear of downlow culture, and the idea that a bisexual person is just a homosexual in transition.
I also think skepticism of bisexuality is product of the fear of downlow culture, and the idea that a bisexual person is just a homosexual in transition.
Aarglefarg
Member
I use 'queer' as a group term alternative to LGBTQQIPA, among people who would understand that's what it means.
The thing I don't like about 'queer' is that it, despite the intentions, homogenises the community. It works against the visibility of less visible gender and sexuality minorities. Person say 'queer', people hear 'gay'.
And a lack of visibility can mean that people think they're being all friendly and accepting and everything, but they are excluding eg bi people because they don't consider the possibility.
The thing I don't like about 'queer' is that it, despite the intentions, homogenises the community. It works against the visibility of less visible gender and sexuality minorities. Person say 'queer', people hear 'gay'.
And a lack of visibility can mean that people think they're being all friendly and accepting and everything, but they are excluding eg bi people because they don't consider the possibility.
chronos4590
Member
i agree especially with the first part. Also I've always thought bisexuality has gotten a bad rep because since they're attracted to both sexes it might fuel other peoples insecurities with their own partners, but i'm not too sure about that exactly.
Edit: lol what Rm88~ said. It is certainly a stupid thing but people will think it either way i suppose
Aarglefarg
Member
For some people it's easier to come out as bisexual, for some people it's easier to come out as gay.
Lots of bi people came out as gay because it's easier, about equal to gay people coming out as bi.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
There's not really a universal reason, no. If you were to ask people why they dislike/don't believe in bisexuals, you'd get a bunch of different responses:
Some gay men and women are afraid that their bi partners will "take the easier path" and leave them for a straight relationship when things get tough.
Some people like to experiment and label themselves as bisexual when they're really not, some think that they are bi but they're actually just confused or they haven't actually come to terms with the fact that they're really just gay or straight, and some really are bi for a while and then aren't (sexuality is fluid, at least for some), which causes a lot of people to think that bisexuality is a fake label that people don to make themselves feel unique or edgy or trendy or more normal or whatever. (Glee even weighed in on this in one episode - "Psh, bi's don't really exist, it's just a label insecure gay guys use to make themselves feel more normal.")
Some people think bi's are greedy, whatever the fuck that means, and some just can't wrap their heads around the fact that it's possible for a person to be attracted to men and women.
There are a lot of dumb reasons and those are just a few that I've come across.
Any updates about your condition Ratsky?
Sexuality never was consistent for me, I always found new kinks or even jumped from bisexual to heterosexual to homosexual 'over night'.
That's why I still haven't labeled myself, because it's not as easy as some make it out to be.
BTW, the news about Hitzlberger were all over the frontpages of the newspapers yesterday.
I love all this coverage about homosexuality (and the mostly positive feedback from people here in Europe) so soon before the events in Sochi.
That's why I still haven't labeled myself, because it's not as easy as some make it out to be.
BTW, the news about Hitzlberger were all over the frontpages of the newspapers yesterday.
I love all this coverage about homosexuality (and the mostly positive feedback from people here in Europe) so soon before the events in Sochi.
You're so queer.
I think the stigma about bisexuality will die down as alternate sexuality becomes more commonly acknowledged.
Zantetsuken88
Member
Oh man I go to sleep for a few hours and look how much I miss!!
I don't like queer as a term that much, mainly because I've mostly heard it used as a derogatory term and it's previous meaning was 'weird' which is a little offensive. Also 'fag' and 'poof' push my buttons a little. But hey it's only words. Sometimes we invest a little too much thought and emotion into words I think.
Also - I came out as bisexual - and I didn't think I was copping out it was more because I was still a little bit unsure about exactly where my sexuality was. So I identified as bisexual for a short while before I realised I was just plain old gay
The problem is, for some people it IS a transition, and that's why it makes it hard for other people to believe in sometimes.
I don't like queer as a term that much, mainly because I've mostly heard it used as a derogatory term and it's previous meaning was 'weird' which is a little offensive. Also 'fag' and 'poof' push my buttons a little. But hey it's only words. Sometimes we invest a little too much thought and emotion into words I think.
Also - I came out as bisexual - and I didn't think I was copping out it was more because I was still a little bit unsure about exactly where my sexuality was. So I identified as bisexual for a short while before I realised I was just plain old gay
The problem is, for some people it IS a transition, and that's why it makes it hard for other people to believe in sometimes.
Bel Marduk
Banned
It's just that queer sounds so archaic.. like homophile, invert, uranian etc. Its just difficult to take anyone seriously who would use that term. You may not necessarily be a racist by using the term colored, but you'd still look ridiculous. Same thing with calling somebody queer.
kitchenmotors
Banned
You mean the guy who said all women are fucking crazy? Yeah, no thanks. You don't say those kinds of things and not expect to be banned. Looks only get you so far if you're a dick about touchy topics.
Leave and save your life! Find a new job in new country!
I wish I had gaf crushes
Zantetsuken88
Member
I dunno it'll be pretty sad when RPJ ends and suddenly I can't look at their face anymore....
Why? It sounds even more pointless than a straight crush...
Ugh, that word again.You're so queer.
I think the stigma about bisexuality will die down as alternate sexuality becomes more commonly acknowledged.
Always reminds me of Bon Clay from OP.
Were there ever a real life couple that met on NeoGAF or a story of some sort ? That would be awesome. Even more so if they were gay, since we're a minority. Kinda like a modern life fairytale.
But anyway yeah, I think you're better off just liking people and their online presence and avoid (ha) falling in love with them, otherwise you'll end up disappointed.
Ohhhh that's nice and sweet ! I just said that because since it's an international message board, it would be awkward ending up loving somebody who lives across the globe
I met my boyfriend through Neogaf (the Gaygaf skype chat actually) and we've been together for 2 years now, so it can happen
Finding a boyfriend who is a big gaming nerd like me is a godsend. I can't imagine being with someone who didn't like gaming. I spend far too much time gaming, and I could see it being a problem if my boyfriend didn't like games.
Zantetsuken88
Member
It's probably worth noting that a crush doesn't necessarily equate to love.
Just appreciation of somebody's looks and/or personality
Just appreciation of somebody's looks and/or personality
I met my boyfriend through Neogaf (the Gaygaf skype chat actually) and we've been together for 2 years now, so it can happen
Finding a boyfriend who is a big gaming nerd like me is a godsend. I can't imagine being with someone who didn't like gaming. I spend far too much time gaming, and I could see it being a problem if my boyfriend didn't like games.
Lucky you ! Congratulations to both of you
It's probably worth noting that a crush doesn't necessarily equate to love.
Just appreciation of somebody's looks and/or personality
Oh yeah, that's what I meant by "liking"
michaeltraps
Member
I'm so glad you said this (and that it worked out for you). I thought I was crazy for wanting something like this, thinking I was being too picky or immature in qualities I look for in a partner.I met my boyfriend through Neogaf (the Gaygaf skype chat actually) and we've been together for 2 years now, so it can happen
Finding a boyfriend who is a big gaming nerd like me is a godsend. I can't imagine being with someone who didn't like gaming. I spend far too much time gaming, and I could see it being a problem if my boyfriend didn't like games.
HolyBaikal
Banned
Having things in common seems like it should always be important when looking for a partner.
Yeah I'd like to have a few things in common with a future bf. Gaming would be a big one so we can always play together.
It's only in the past year and a half or so that I've actually become a bit more confident in my bisexuality, because I've encountered a bit more biphobia/erasure online and offline, and I think it's important that people know/understand that it's a real (weird) thing.
I'm pretty genuinely surprised at the amount of bi folks that seem to pop up in any of the more sexually tinged threads though! It's pretty neat.
hay u
I'm pretty genuinely surprised at the amount of bi folks that seem to pop up in any of the more sexually tinged threads though! It's pretty neat.
hay u
Dead Prince
Banned
playing with each other's joystick can be gaming.
If you do anything web design related your job is in really high demand, here in Brazil and in Colombia.
What? no, it's not a /crush crush/, it's that you hold a certain posters in special regards, and they're attractive to you in some sense.
The banned kid said a stupid thing but that's the way he always talked, very "enthusiasmic", he's not a dick, just a little outspoken with a bit of latinamerican overreacting lol. I liked him for that. My other and most dearest crush is the complete opposite, but I will remain shut.
VICTORsaurio
Member
Thanks guys, your words are very encouraging
I think this is the smarter plan right now, though I will still try to look for opportunities while I'm in the Netherlands (and before).
I've done a couple of websites at the office but I don't do programming so I'm not sure. I'll start looking for jobs right after I update my portfolio this weekend
Dead Prince
Banned
"Países Bajos" is Spanish for Netherlads. It sounds so bad (literally "Low Countries", lol)
its so close to hollandaise.
I've done a couple of websites at the office but I don't do programming so I'm not sure. I'll start looking for jobs right after I update my portfolio this weekend
The graphic designers I know do very little programming, however some basics like javascript are essential. It's not hard at all to learn though.
Keep the option in mind, I say it because it is one of the biggest growing careers right now in the region, Latinamerica is lacking a lot in web designers and web developers, and having English and Spanish will help you a lot.
I do wonder about the other topic of this thread
about gay rights, I have no idea about Venezuela, but Colombia has made some advances, however our society is staunchly conservative so there are some obstacles, on the other hand Brasil and Argentina are ages ahead in that regard, something to consider as well if you are thinking about moving out. Argentina is extremely cheap so getting there with little money is doable, on the other hand the country seems to be following the Venezuela path.Zantetsuken88
Member
"Países Bajos" is Spanish for Netherlads. It sounds so bad (literally "Low Countries", lol)
Thats what it means in English too - Nether = Low. Netherlands = Lowlands.
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