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LGBThread |OT4| We're (still) Here! We're (still) Queer!

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Track and Field is killing me :( I get home everyday and sleep until 7pm lol also the coach learned my name already and that's a bad thing because he'll start noticing whenever im absent to practice :l
 
At least you look like you have a natural tan-ish colour to your skin.

I'm a pasty milk-bottle and I have to sun-worship for WEEKS to start turning brown D:

Pale is more fashionable now than it has been recently, if you're naturally fair skinned.

If you have any tan at all that's a sign that you're damaging your skin, it seems like a silly thing to do for the sake of vanity. Use like gradual tanners or something instead.
 

Crayons

Banned
Has anyone else been getting this message from Google?



WTF is this shit? This is happening whenever I try to Google something!
Yeah. I use proxies though.

Track and Field is killing me :( I get home everyday and sleep until 7pm lol also the coach learned my name already and that's a bad thing because he'll start noticing whenever im absent to practice :l
Flirt with the coach and get him to forget the days when you don't show ;) ;)
 

Caladrius

Member
I am almost certain that I am being ignored.

Now do I guilt-trip him or do I bitch him out?

fuck it im running away from arizona, this is what track and field was for

this is my destiny goodbye arizona

I hope you brought plenty of water. And a cooler so you're not drinking half-melted plastic.
 
I am almost certain that I am being ignored.

Now do I guilt-trip him or do I bitch him out?

What do you expect to gain, exactly? If someone is intentionally avoiding you, you can't really make them change their mind. At most I'd say you can let him know how you feel (like that he's acting like a child), but it probably won't change anything. If you're consistently the one making all the effort despite him he'll come to resent you or see you as an imposition on his freedom. No one wants to feel guilted into anything, that's likely to drive him further away imo.
 

Caladrius

Member
What do you expect to gain, exactly? If someone is intentionally avoiding you, you can't really make them change their mind. At most I'd say you can let him know how you feel (like that he's acting like a child), but it probably won't change anything. If you're consistently the one making all the effort despite him he'll come to resent you or see you as an imposition on his freedom. No one wants to feel guilted into anything, that's likely to drive him further away imo.
I suppose you're right about reacting like that.

I'm just frustrated because we seemed to be getting along very well (our conversations regularly spanned hours and we kept regular contact) up until I mentioned coming over to his house. He agreed to see what times were available but he hasn't responded to my messages since. And I gave him a week after we talked about it to check into that before I even tried to message him about it. (And I've made a point of spacing out the messages I've sent since.)
 
I suppose you're right about reacting like that.

I'm just frustrated because we seemed to be getting along very well (our conversations regularly spanned hours and we kept regular contact) up until I mentioned coming over to his house. He agreed to see what times were available but he hasn't responded to my messages since. And I gave him a week after we talked about it to check into that before I even tried to message him about it. (And I've made a point of spacing out the messages I've sent since.)

That would be irritating. He might be depressed or incapable/unwilling to offer a 'real' friendship, though, and too cowardly to say so. The only reason I say that is because as a kind of coping mechanism what he's doing doesn't really 'work', and people with a clearer outlook tend to use methods that 'work' better. What I mean is if he cares enough to maintain consistent contact, then he's also hurting himself in the process. It's just messy, it's like he willingly painted himself into a corner and normally people don't really do that, they either don't get so involved, or they more clearly define what they're willing to offer.

I'm not really sure though. I think people are often pretty funny. Like we want to demand an explanation or we maybe feel like we're owed one, and maybe that's even true and we're not overstepping our boundaries demanding one, it seems like a lot of the time there isn't really a good explanation that satisfies us, so we end up just having to deal with it anyways even with an 'explanation'. I mean, probably the bulk of human behavior is irrational, and often we're driven by all of these strange compulsions we don't even understand.

I would definitely be annoyed though, all I can really say is if this goes on longer just to maybe send a message along the lines of "hanging out isn't really that important, I'm kind of hurt you didn't bother to stay in contact though" with some tone of finality or a farewell and see what happens? It's kind of hard to know what to do if anything.
 

RM8

Member
So Toluca has its own sun?

J/k sunscreen is a must if you are going to have a long sun exposure

It's great that my skin is great with it. That's why having a light dark/dark skin is cool.
Toluca has an elevation of 2,667m, so yeah, sun can be pretty terrible around here :( It's insane because the sun can be shining bright and roasting your skin, while at the same time there's strong freezing wind attacking your face.

At least you look like you have a natural tan-ish colour to your skin.

I'm a pasty milk-bottle and I have to sun-worship for WEEKS to start turning brown D:
Lol, that seems like a good problem to have :p
 

Caladrius

Member
That would be irritating. He might be depressed or incapable/unwilling to offer a 'real' friendship, though, and too cowardly to say so. The only reason I say that is because as a kind of coping mechanism what he's doing doesn't really 'work', and people with a clearer outlook tend to use methods that 'work' better. What I mean is if he cares enough to maintain consistent contact, then he's also hurting himself in the process. It's just messy, it's like he willingly painted himself into a corner and normally people don't really do that, they either don't get so involved, or they more clearly define what they're willing to offer.

I'm not really sure though. I think people are often pretty funny. Like we want to demand an explanation or we maybe feel like we're owed one, and maybe that's even true and we're not overstepping our boundaries demanding one, it seems like a lot of the time there isn't really a good explanation that satisfies us, so we end up just having to deal with it anyways even with an 'explanation'. I mean, probably the bulk of human behavior is irrational, and often we're driven by all of these strange compulsions we don't even understand.

I would definitely be annoyed though, all I can really say is if this goes on longer just to maybe send a message along the lines of "hanging out isn't really that important, I'm kind of hurt you didn't bother to stay in contact though" with some tone of finality or a farewell and see what happens? It's kind of hard to know what to do if anything.

He has plenty of other friends and tends to be very socially active. It's likely he just forgot and is too embarrassed to address it. I'm going to try and maintain good faith he isn't doing it for stupid reasons. Part of me is kind of afraid (now that I've actually cooled down) to address the issue because once it's clear that I'm disappointed/agitated that kind of permanently colors everything we do afterwards.
 

Sai-kun

Banned
Pale is more fashionable now than it has been recently, if you're naturally fair skinned.

If you have any tan at all that's a sign that you're damaging your skin, it seems like a silly thing to do for the sake of vanity. Use like gradual tanners or something instead.

even if i'm naturally tan? :(
 

Sai-kun

Banned
Having a tan in this case meaning darker than your default skin tone :p
You're going to die

replace webmd with your username

WebMD.png


thanks a lot!!! </3
 

Mumei

Member
Study: Homophobia Takes Years Off Your Life

There’s a price to be paid for homophobia, and it’s a steep one: Approximately two and one-half years off of your life.

That’s the conclusion of a provocative new research paper, which examines the social attitudes and death rates of a large, representative sample of Americans over two recent decades.

While they found no link between homophobia and cancer deaths, anti-gay bias “was specifically associated with cardiovascular-related causes of death among heterosexuals,” they write.

“However,” they add, “our sensitivity analyses indicated that anti-gay prejudice increased mortality risk more strongly than racial prejudice.”

We can already envision the public-service campaign: Bigotry: It’s Bad for Your Health.
 

mantidor

Member
correlation&#8800;causation

You sometimes just have to trust the source. While the article does't mention it, I would expect the result of the overall survey had several controls, no one in the scientific community sees two trends and associate them without really analyzing the data.
 

Mumei

Member
correlation&#8800;causation

... I'm aware. I'm not sure in what spirit I'm supposed to receive this comment, but it feels sort of dismissive.

If you read the article, you'll see that they talk about ideas for underlying causes that might explain the correlation between homophobia (and bigotry more generally) and shorter lifespans. The study authors also assert that this contributes to "'a growing body of research suggesting that reducing prejudice may improve the health of both minority and majority populations.'"
 
Yeah, I think it's a fairly common view now that maladaptive habits (hatefulness in this example) lead to epigenetic changes that influence general health.
 
You sometimes just have to trust the source. While the article does't mention it, I would expect the result of the overall survey had several controls, no one in the scientific community sees two trends and associate them without really analyzing the data.

It does indeed. The source (here) indicates they had numerous alternative potential sources included (this section is kind of long so I've tried to bold relevant parts to make it easier to skim through):

Covariates.

We included an array of covariates to eliminate alternative explanations for elevated mortality among heterosexuals harboring antigay prejudice. Specifically, we examined 3 types of individual-level covariates that have been strongly predictive of mortality risk in prior research: demographics, socioeconomic indicators, and current health.17&#8211;20 We examined relationships between these covariates and mortality in bivariate models; all covariates were statistically significantly associated with mortality and were therefore retained in the multivariate models.

Demographic controls included respondent&#8217;s racial/ethnic identification (White, Black, or other race), gender (male or female), age at interview, marital status (married, widowed, or divorced or separated), and nativity status (indicating whether the respondent was born outside the United States).


We included 2 socioeconomic measures&#8212;household income and individual educational attainment&#8212;because of the established inverse association between these variables and individual mortality risk.21 Given the skewed distribution of the income variable, we used the natural log of income in our models. The measure of educational attainment corresponded to the respondent&#8217;s number of years of formal education.

We included a measure of current health status, which was assessed by a single item: &#8220;Would you say your own health, in general, is excellent, good, fair or poor?&#8221; Previous research has demonstrated that self-rated health is a valid indicator of health distress as well as the presence of disease and differentiates heightened mortality risk.22 We dichotomized self-rated health into fair or poor health (coded 1) and good or excellent health (coded 0).

In addition to these covariates, we controlled for 2 covariates in specificity analyses. First, we included a measure of racial prejudice to determine whether the results were specific to antigay prejudice or were attributable to prejudice more generally. This was necessary given that both measures of prejudice (racial and antigay) were strongly correlated in the GSS sample (r&#8201;=&#8201;0.31; P&#8201;<&#8201;.001). We took the measure of racial prejudice from the 5 items that were consistently available in the GSS. Four of these items asked respondents to indicate the reasons why Blacks have &#8220;worse jobs, income, and housing than White people.&#8221; Possible answers ranged from &#8220;discrimination&#8221; to &#8220;Blacks have less in-born ability to learn.&#8221; The fifth item asked respondents whether there should be laws against interracial marriage. Second, given that religious attitudes are associated with antigay prejudice,23 we also controlled for religiosity, which was operationalized as frequency of prayer (those who prayed several times a week or more were considered to pray frequently).

Whether or not the methodology was flawed is another issue, but they certainly seemed to try and minimise the impact that other factors would have upon their results.
 

bsej87

Member
The actual study is a bit more interesting than the sensationalist headline with a few shiny pull quotes. In the discussion the authors basically admit that they couldn't control for a lot of things nor were they able to determine if it was strictly a function of homophobia or a more generalized prejudice. So, in more realistic terms, we've known for a long time that stress can cause cardiovascular health issues, we know prejudice can lead to increased rates of stress, and then this study indicates that homophobia alone may be sufficient prejudice to cause such stress. However, as the authors state, once they controlled various other factors, the effect on life expectancy was greatly attenuated, though still significant. "Homophobia takes years off your life" is hack journalism. "Antigay prejudice may be an important indicator of heightened mortality risk among majority group members" is what was actually concluded.

Yeah, I think it's a fairly common view now that maladaptive habits (hatefulness in this example) lead to epigenetic changes that influence general health.

Do you have some sources? I've mostly only studied epigenetics from the neurobiology side of it and a few papers about cancer and specific genetic disorders. I've never actually heard of it being linked to maladaptive habits influencing health, but I'd be interesting in reading up on it.

I'm also excited that it's recruitment weekend finally and I get to take our PhD applicants out on the town and to some parades as I've been stuck working in social isolation lately and it was starting to drive me into a self-loathing craze starved for human interaction lol
 

Caladrius

Member
Finally managed to get up with my friend. He didn't mention anything about me coming over. I didn't bring it up though. We had a pretty normal conversation otherwise.I think I'll try and ask him again in a month or so. If he doesn't follow through with it again then I think I'll bring it up.

I need new (preferably gay) social venues though. Hrm.
 
Do you have some sources? I've mostly only studied epigenetics from the neurobiology side of it and a few papers about cancer and specific genetic disorders. I've never actually heard of it being linked to maladaptive habits influencing health, but I'd be interesting in reading up on it.

I'm also excited that it's recruitment weekend finally and I get to take our PhD applicants out on the town and to some parades as I've been stuck working in social isolation lately and it was starting to drive me into a self-loathing craze starved for human interaction lol

To be honest I just noticed that I made a whole bunch of intuitive leaps without realizing it. What I've heard of would basically fall under the field of behavioral epigenetics, then I just made the casual assumption that that would have a negative effect on general health as well because it seems like that would be the case considering how many factors 'health' has :/

I have the bad habit of just integrating bits of information on the basis of intuition, like I don't really have a very diligent filtering mechanism to be honest and I'm not really mentally disciplined enough to be like adept at science or anything beyond just integrating concepts and theories (which is like the consumerists'/passive science, lol, certainly not active science) so regard me as a fool speaking above his threshold of knowledge.

I could never get a PhD! I'm such a freewheeling dilettante, it's awful. (I could imagine the social isolation though).
 
Hey peeps. Haven't visited our special little thread here for a bit. Hope everyone's doing well.

Anyway, I went wine tasting a few days ago, and tried a bunch of different reds and whites. This particular one though is damn dangerous. It just tastes like effervescent, sweet, sweet champagne. God I need more of it inside me. And it's priced less than most 3DS games out there. Everyone needs to try it. :p
 

Alrus

Member
I find myself having a hard time drinking more than a glass of sweet wine at a time, I understand why people like that kind of wine, but I much prefer "regular" red wine.
 

Mr_Zombie

Member
I don't like wine. I can drink one glass with dinner or dessert, but on its own, I don't like it. One glass is enough to make me dizzy. Vodka, beer, whiskey - I can drink a lot; but wine and champaign are my kryptonites. :/
 
So... This is kind of my first time posting here, but y'all just seemed so nice I had to drop in :)

Went on my first date with a guy yesterday, and honestly... It was awesome.

We only went to go see a movie, Lone Survivor (It was great!), but it was a fantastic experience. I've went on similar movie-dates with girls in the past, and damn, they seriously did not compare. I made the first move to hold his hand, then we spent the rest of the movie cuddling and it was just... amazing. Walked him to his car, kissed a few times then he said he wanted to see me again and I couldn't agree more :)

... Anyways, that's my story haha. Nice to meet you all!
 
So... This is kind of my first time posting here, but y'all just seemed so nice I had to drop in :)

Went on my first date with a guy yesterday, and honestly... It was awesome.

We only went to go see a movie, Lone Survivor (It was great!), but it was a fantastic experience. I've went on similar movie-dates with girls in the past, and damn, they seriously did not compare. I made the first move to hold his hand, then we spent the rest of the movie cuddling and it was just... amazing. Walked him to his car, kissed a few times then he said he wanted to see me again and I couldn't agree more :)

... Anyways, that's my story haha. Nice to meet you all!

Congrats and it's nice to meet you! I need something like this to happen to me.
 

T.O.P

Banned
So... This is kind of my first time posting here, but y'all just seemed so nice I had to drop in :)

Went on my first date with a guy yesterday, and honestly... It was awesome.

We only went to go see a movie, Lone Survivor (It was great!), but it was a fantastic experience. I've went on similar movie-dates with girls in the past, and damn, they seriously did not compare. I made the first move to hold his hand, then we spent the rest of the movie cuddling and it was just... amazing. Walked him to his car, kissed a few times then he said he wanted to see me again and I couldn't agree more :)

... Anyways, that's my story haha. Nice to meet you all!

congratz and welcome to this thread <3
 
So... This is kind of my first time posting here, but y'all just seemed so nice I had to drop in :)

Went on my first date with a guy yesterday, and honestly... It was awesome.

We only went to go see a movie, Lone Survivor (It was great!), but it was a fantastic experience. I've went on similar movie-dates with girls in the past, and damn, they seriously did not compare. I made the first move to hold his hand, then we spent the rest of the movie cuddling and it was just... amazing. Walked him to his car, kissed a few times then he said he wanted to see me again and I couldn't agree more :)

... Anyways, that's my story haha. Nice to meet you all!

Sounds perfect! Welcome dude :)
 
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