*_*
His name is Remi Alade-Chester, in case you are wondering about that.
No experience but I really want to try it out if possible with partners who feel comfortable with that (if the opportunity arises).
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LGBTQIA+ | OT7 | ~First comes love, then comes marriage~
- Thread starter Kater
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*_*
His name is Remi Alade-Chester, in case you are wondering about that.
PulseONE
Member
That's something I was worrying about too.
At the same time, if he falls for someone else, that would mean they were doing something better than me, maybe in that case it would for the best...
*sigh*
You both have to be not-jealous types, or be able to turn your jealousy into excitement/another positive emotion for your primary partner.
Don't keep score.
Do get tested often, and together.
I'm down for an open relationship (with like very specific ground rules), but like Dany, I'm more into the idea of a threesome/moresome.
Don't keep score.
Do get tested often, and together.
I'm down for an open relationship (with like very specific ground rules), but like Dany, I'm more into the idea of a threesome/moresome.
If you guys are in a relationship already you guys should be open and talk about what you could do better and what he could do better for both to be pleased. The relationships are about understanding and working together to both be pleased with the relationship. He doesn't need to have sex with someone else to tell you that he wants you to get better at something and likewise for you cause you know what you like and what you don't. Honesty is the best policy and if even like that doesn't work then break up. I don't see why he needs to be in a open relationship to experience other things but if both of you are comfortable with the idea go for it but talk the do and don't of the relationship.
PulseONE
Member
We are the non jealous types, we both see sex as sex and love as love, two things that can exist independently. But I can't help but feel a little afraid about it.
The issue was...well this is embarrassing...uh...due to problems with me (psychological, not physical) I wasn't really satisfying him, sexually. Eventually he stopped asking for it altogether. This was basically the ONLY problem we've had (been together 3 years). I saw it was starting to become a serious problem...but I really didn't know how to solve it.
I figured this would be a solution, he can be with someone else like that and we'd still be together. It's just started, and I know he's been with someone. I don't really feel anything about it, I'm actually glad that he's getting through with something. But I just don't know how it'll turn out in the long haul.
The issue was...well this is embarrassing...uh...due to problems with me (psychological, not physical) I wasn't really satisfying him, sexually. Eventually he stopped asking for it altogether. This was basically the ONLY problem we've had (been together 3 years). I saw it was starting to become a serious problem...but I really didn't know how to solve it.
I figured this would be a solution, he can be with someone else like that and we'd still be together. It's just started, and I know he's been with someone. I don't really feel anything about it, I'm actually glad that he's getting through with something. But I just don't know how it'll turn out in the long haul.
Dead Prince
Banned
Blood Diamonds
Banned
I would die in an open relationship honestly. Though I guess that both of you guys have to be comfortable with it and not let jealousy/doubts get the best of youm
My
nonexistent
Aarglefarg
Member
I know people who are poly and it works well for them. Maybe I could be in a poly relationship more comfortably than an open one.
Astral Dog
Member
Life is too short to worry about such things, if you are comfortable with it, everything is going to be fine, i assume Trust and understanding would be the most important part of such relationship.
umop_3pisdn
Member
I'm not opposed to open relationships, and I'm not really a jealous person, but I also don't know what I'd get out of one. I don't want to actually have sex with that many people (fantasies are another matter), so I only see it becoming relevant once the passion starts to die down/the seven year itch kicks in, and maybe by then I'd feel committed enough due to a sense of shared history and stuff that I just don't even feel like opening that door, even if I think the risk is relatively small, because it seems like tacky or something (lol?). So in theory it's a maybe, but in practice it seems not all that likely.
Poly relationships I actually find harder to agree to. I think the idea that we can love lots of people is pretty optimistic. You hear it often enough from parents that when they have kids they feel such strong love for their children, then they look at their spouse and go "who are you, again?" Like the love they have for their kids only emphasizes how much of a 'stranger off the street' this person is that they built a life/home with, lol. So there's always going to be a sort of 'love hierarchy', at least in terms of how we put our relationships into practice, and in love the main thing I look for that makes me feel safe is consistency in someones' affections, poly relationships introduce a kind of inherent inconsistency that for me would just be inviting insecurity honestly.
Poly relationships I actually find harder to agree to. I think the idea that we can love lots of people is pretty optimistic. You hear it often enough from parents that when they have kids they feel such strong love for their children, then they look at their spouse and go "who are you, again?" Like the love they have for their kids only emphasizes how much of a 'stranger off the street' this person is that they built a life/home with, lol. So there's always going to be a sort of 'love hierarchy', at least in terms of how we put our relationships into practice, and in love the main thing I look for that makes me feel safe is consistency in someones' affections, poly relationships introduce a kind of inherent inconsistency that for me would just be inviting insecurity honestly.
ZombiePlatypus
Member
More power to everyone that makes it work for them, but yea an open relationship would be a complete disaster for me.
Shhhhhh we can sob together.
Shhhhhh we can sob together.
This is perfect.
Santa plz... D:
umop_3pisdn
Member
I live for Alaska's Jamie Lee Curtis realness.
You Know Nothing
Member
My Spotify Weekly for the past few weeks has been full of alternative/indie/etc and drag queen songs.
I was thinking what a succinct summation of my musical proclivities it really is.
I was thinking what a succinct summation of my musical proclivities it really is.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
let grimes into your life
CornBurrito
Member
Dude in red shorts... wow. Yeah.
But face honestly is the most important thing for me. Body type doesn't matter much to me.
But face honestly is the most important thing for me. Body type doesn't matter much to me.
You Know Nothing
Member
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
She's already there, sis.
Receipt:
approve
Taylor Swift tho? 😷She's already there, sis.
Receipt:
CornBurrito
Member
Dont speak ill of Tay Tay.
You Know Nothing
Member
I can't help it. I just really like Speak Now and Red. I constantly revisit them.
Taylucifer's power.
Blood Diamonds
Banned
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
gaf is real-life tho
You can always discuss those things here or PM those who you feel you can talk about things you dont want to publicly discuss.There is nothing wrong with it really. Also hope you find some local gay friends to discuss those things with someone who is more closer.
Aeriscloud
Banned
Escape Goat
Member
Whats a reputable site to buy porn bluray/dvds from? Im leary of giving any porn site money. I know nobody buys physical media anymore and less pay for porn. But maybe somebody here has done it before. Its intended to be part of an in joke between us. Ive already got him a gift card to a fancy korean spa that he likes to go to.
umop_3pisdn
Member
Let's bond over house music, surely the democratic common ground of the gayz.
Apparently all I listen to is artpop, various genres of electronic music, and (neo-)classical. I used to try to be eclectic but I'm old now and stopped trying.
Apparently all I listen to is artpop, various genres of electronic music, and (neo-)classical. I used to try to be eclectic but I'm old now and stopped trying.
Henchmen21
Banned
How was your Thanksgiving lettersgaf? Brother's Girlfriend had some of her family over and they had some obnoxious kids.
Also bitterly cold here in Utah.
I still buy Blurays/DVD's. Not porn but still
Also bitterly cold here in Utah.
I still buy Blurays/DVD's. Not porn but still
TheAbsolution
Member
It was awesome. Instead of working, they let me have the day off because business was light and I went to family's house to chill and eat food.
Also, now I'm the proud owner of a PS4.
Blood Diamonds
Banned
Mostmanlyman
Member
I have been listen to arca's new album mutant, weird experimental electronic.
Also I have been listened to busdriver's album perfect hair he does hip hop, I'm liking both of them.
Also I have been listened to busdriver's album perfect hair he does hip hop, I'm liking both of them.
Cosmic Bus
pristine morning snow
Spent much of the day making lots of croissants and apple pies to bring to my partner's family dinner. We packed everything up, got the dog all ready to go, and then I realized I had reserved our Zipcar for the wrong day. Too late, there was nothing else available by that point, and we had no way to get there. :\
Ended up going to Chinatown for dinner. Upon coming home, our building's fire alarm was going off and everyone was standing in the parking lot. Some idiot on the second floor set their kitchen on fire, but it was contained quickly. Our poor dog was panicked from the alarm and he's acting scared now. :\
Preamble: Lesbian in a polyamorous relationship, but it should be noted that our circle is not "open".
What that essentially entails is what Sai-kun describes and more. Jealousy does not enter, excitement and celebrating in your partner's joy, no score keeping, regular testing.
Now onto more. The circle is not open, meaning that people do not move freely into it, be it via one night stands or random hookups or whathaveyou. Communication and openness between partners is foundational, and no one moves into the circle without there being honest communication about it beforehand (and yeah, vetos can be dropped on psychos and the like) and responsible actions toward the health of oneself and that of the circle.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
why
She's already there, sis.
Receipt:
I wish I could do this on Spotify. But I have a feeling my top two would be Years and Years and Ashbjorn.
I don't know. He was just in a mood. He left for work and gave me a hug bye and said sorry, that he was tired.
But anyway, anybody have any horrible/overheard conversations with conservative family?
PulseONE
Member
*nod nod* Close enough
I'm glad I didn't get a negative response lol I wasn't sure
It's sort of hard meeting gay people in my country, its pretty homophobic here, so GAF is the best I've got xD
This one guy saying how the media is deceiving and vaccines are evil because they can make your children sick... But god will protect those who believe in him so vaccines aren't really necessary.
Yeah... I didn't bother. lol
TheAbsolution
Member
I hope he's alright. :/
Nah, no conservative conversations. Matter of fact. We had great conversations about Hillary and Bernie Sanders.
Thequietone
Member
Food was good, but veiled racism and a condescending remark about liberals being to politically correct about the Syrian refugees. Least they didn't ask my opinion like last year, ugh.
D
Deleted member 465307
Unconfirmed Member
There's something a little sad about being at a Thanksgiving gathering where one relative casually mentions their new heterosexual bf/gf without a second thought while you agree with another relative about the benefits of your single life when you're not single at all.
It was overall one of the best Thanksgivings I've been to, but I felt a bit guilty.
It was overall one of the best Thanksgivings I've been to, but I felt a bit guilty.
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