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LGBTQIA Thread |OT5| Can't even drink straight

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Caladrius

Member
Yup, that's more or less it exactly. I find that his work in general is created with a very deft understanding of feeling, particularly paradoxical feeling or a kind of existential irony, which I think is why I like it so much. For example with his concept album Fordlandia, the theme suffusing the whole thing is that of failed, foolhardy, or even morally wrong - ambition, yet it ends on a note that's painfully optimistic. I listened to it during a particularly low period of my life, and it was the most healing thing I can remember from that period. Then those themes are repeated in The Miners' Hymns, which is even more melancholic, arrested and distant (somehow something less than melancholy), and ending in that strange kind of triumph the 'survivors' somehow allow themselves. Everything he does is like some contradiction that the heart seems to naturally know or understand, it's so bold and so fragile at the same time.

Sorry, I just geeked the fuck out so hard. I don't actually expect you to listen to all of that. It's long, slow building, and sometimes there isn't much to grab onto. I just think his stuff is like a balm for your soul. It's deeply imbued with feeling, but devoid of sentimentality, it's complex and painful but in a way that tries to mirror reality exactly and by consequence find a kind of true or realistic optimism, so in the end it's strangely healing.

I think I will check out a bit more of his catalog. I could stand to have more variety as far as ambient music goes. I mostly just have more oppressive-sounding fare.

And nothing wrong with enthusing about your favorite music. I get tempted to start gushing about music when I'm bored (and unlike you, I don't need any provocation.)

This is why I avoid all kinds of social contact/social situations. :cool:

I just don't talk to people because I generally hate them. I'm a twat like that. *shrugs*
To the ones I do like I turn into one of those shy mushy girls in anime.
 

WonderzL

Banned
...That's going through my head like 24/7. I wish I can stop being so self-conscious.

That happened with me a year ago. I had a crush on this (gay) guy, but I wound up not doing anything, feeling like I wasn't interesting enough or handsome. I don't regret this because I don't want anything with the guy, but the bad feeling that I'm nobody probably remained until this day - at least a little bit. I wish I had a better self-steem. Coming out this year has helped a lot, though. I really wish you can overcome all your insecurities!

I just don't talk to people because I generally hate them. I'm a twat like that. *shrugs*
To the ones I do like I turn into one of those shy mushy girls in anime.

I am very shy, like "considered dropping his future-teacher career" level of shyness
 

daripad

Member
I'm shy and I'm the worst person to keep a conversation going. I'm good at listening to other other people though, specially when they are telling me a story.
 
I think I will check out a bit more of his catalog. I could stand to have more variety as far as ambient music goes. I mostly just have more oppressive-sounding fare.

And nothing wrong with enthusing about your favorite music. I get tempted to start gushing about music when I'm bored (and unlike you, I don't need any provocation.)

I think at least some of it you will probably like, a lot of it can be kind of oppressive but it's more like an oppressive sadness I guess :p I'm glad I wasn't a bother, lately I'm getting into this pattern where I have to explain like every feeling I have. It's weird.

And oh man I'm kind of glad I didn't do a second meditation session today. Since I wrote that post I've been just listening to music with my eyes closed and I feel high. I remember you saying you never really got the spiritual experience thing, well if you ever have a couple thousand extra dollars lying around (lol I know) consider investing it in an EEG with entropy and TAGsync designs. It's basically the quick way of learning how to meditate (concentrating on emptiness or thought-suppression, and 'awareness of awareness' practices, respectively) and it is crazy how powerful they are in combination. I'm like persistently tripping out in my daily life and it's kind of hilarious when I stop to think about it.
 
I'm shy and I'm the worst person to keep a conversation going. I'm good at listening to other other people though, specially when they are telling me a story.

I've improved on this tremendously since getting a job as a reporter. You get used to asking the basics for every topic: who, what, when, where, why and how. Then you just branch off into another topic if it interests you. If you have a related story, tell it.

I know, it's easier said than done. :S It takes practice, but you guys can do it! ^^

My thing is just initiating with people. If it's for my job, it's not an issue at all. If it's at a party? No way.

On another topic: I feel bad because I ate some pretzels and nuts at poker tonight. Not a lot, by any stretch, but I've been trying to avoid falling off the wagon, if you will.

Also, I'm at 25 pounds lost! Wooo! I promise before-and-after photos for the thread when I hit 180.
 

Kater

Banned
I just don't talk to people because I generally hate them. I'm a twat like that. *shrugs*
To the ones I do like I turn into one of those shy mushy girls in anime.
Drop the "hate", that's my advice. It's unhealthy. Humans are social creatures, we don't feel good when we isolate ourselves too much. Just read a little bit of (for example:) Schopenhauers late work and you will understand how badly you can damage a human mind with a lack of interaction with other humans.

I'm shy and I'm the worst person to keep a conversation going. I'm good at listening to other other people though, specially when they are telling me a story.
But you told stories in here or to me before! So that's not completely true. 😉
 

Kater

Banned
Not to be a downer, but talking on online message boards is a bit different from talking to others in person.
Oh, that is certainly true. But it is a good start to open up, generally. And the internet is the real world, it is not an extension of it so it is not like it isn't a brave act.
 
Oh, that is certainly true. But it is a good start to open up, generally. And the internet is the real world, it is not an extension of it so it is not like it isn't a brave act.

Well, I don't know about it. In the Internet I may be witty, fun and charming, but irl I just want to hide into a hole until everything ends.

Must be some self-esteem issues. Or the (right) belief that I have nothing to say, and it's worthless to speak with me, and I can't even matain conversation with potential husbando material, and asdf.

Needed to vent out after a night of writing and reading stuff from college. >.<
 

Kater

Banned
Well, I don't know about it. In the Internet I may be witty, fun and charming, but irl I just want to hide into a hole until everything ends.

Must be some self-esteem issues. Or the (right) belief that I have nothing to say, and it's worthless to speak with me, and I can't even matain conversation with potential husbando material, and asdf.

Needed to vent out after a night of writing and reading stuff from college. >.<
It's still part of this world. Talking in a forum is like talking with a mask on to a stranger (in my head, anyway).

And you can't hide your true feelings from others forever, somehow it leaks through into everything you do no matter how hard you try to hide it. Try to work on your issues, ignoring them and acting like nothing is wrong makes them worse (in my experience).

Don't know if this makes sense, had a rough weekend so I'm still a bit affected by it.
 

mantidor

Member
I don't think social interactions are that difficult. I mean, they are daunting for us the introverted type, but they are not complex. If you don't understand something seriously, just ask. What's the worst it could happen? If people give you shit for not knowing then they suck and are not worth your time :p.
 

daripad

Member

I guess I should ask more questions &#128539;

And congrats on what you're doing, it takes a lot of will to keep going. I'll wait for those pics.
I have to lose weight but I keep procrastinating on it.

But you told stories in here or to me before! So that's not completely true. &#128521;

I think Poltergust is right:
Talking on online message boards is a bit different from talking to others in person.

And there are things that I can't tell to people around here. I really don't have much things to talk about, and the things I'm knowledgeable about are not interesting for many people.
 

maxcriden

Member
FWIW dari, I think you always have a lot of interesting things to say. Plus you're a med student, right? So you have a wide swath of knowledge people are interested in, just from that.
 
I am always open to talking to others for those who want to listen.
If someone is clearly not interested in keeping a conversation going I wont waste my time.

I used to be shy myself but I opened up a lot. Some people are late bloomers.
 

Dany

Banned
I am always open to talking to others for those who want to listen.
If someone is clearly not interested in keeping a conversation going I wont waste my time.

I used to be shy myself but I opened up a lot. Some people are late bloomers.

Exactly, you are worth someones else time. If thats not the case then drop it and move on, thats on them, not you.
 
Exactly, you are worth someones else time. If thats not the case then drop it and move on, thats on them, not you.

Yup, I had my fair share of jerks so I know how to handle those situations.
Be it friends or guys you are interested in there is always someone better who will listen.

Listening is a big thing more than people realize.
 

Kater

Banned
Max, why are you junior'ed all of a sudden?

I think Poltergust is right:
Like I said, it is still an act of bravery, especially in a time of cyber-bullying and all that. I think it is really a great thing that you can talk a lot about your life here, in fact, you are able to talk a lot more about your private life than me.
 

daripad

Member
Like I said, it is still an act of bravery, especially in a time of cyber-bullying and all that. I think it is really a great thing that you can talk a lot about your life here, in fact, you are able to talk a lot more about your private life than me.

I really don't care much about cyber-bullying.

FWIW dari, I think you always have a lot of interesting things to say. Plus you're a med student, right? So you have a wide swath of knowledge people are interested in, just from that.

Really? I always think that I'm boring heh and yes, you're right.

I guess I should say more random stuff to maintain a conversation.
 

maxcriden

Member
Gato, I'll PM you....

Really? I always think that I'm boring heh and yes, you're right.

I guess I should say more random stuff to maintain a conversation.

No I think you always have interesting stuff to say! Just talk about what you care about and if anyone is a genuine person they will earnestly listen. :)
 

Grizzo

Member
Really? I always think that I'm boring heh and yes, you're right.

I guess I should say more random stuff to maintain a conversation.

You should absolutely do that! Random is always fun. I like blabbering about the stupidest things, it can be a great ice breaker and sometimes it even makes people laugh. So don't ever be afraid to talk about anything!

Max, why are you junior'ed all of a sudden?

Gato, I'll PM

I think we are not supposed to talk about it but I'll just say that it was done for unfair reasons. That was my (only) two cents.
 

Kater

Banned
Hope your status gets returned to Member soon enough, as I've already said in the PM. Gaming side needs the positive enthusiasm of yours for our shared hobby. &#128521;


Something unrelated, I just found this picture on tumblr.

tumblr_nesdhdwMFS1risghto1_500.png


Thought I'd share this with you since some people in here are LoZ fans. A funny little edit of the moon from Majora's Mask to make him look a bit more... friendly? (It's actually creepier that way, with the face of Thomas the Locomotive. &#128554; )
 
I think it looks more like the Moon emoji from WhatsApp.

tumblr_n04e9uXlSX1s6294bo1_500.png


Still, I think Thomas the train would be even creepier.

Today I'm not that grumpy for everything, as I am currently talking to someone somewhat special -- dunno if it will become anything, but it's a nice friendship nonetheless.

¡Por cierto! For those VN-Addicted people... Should I buy Hatoful Boyfriend?
I want it to be my first Steam purchase, but I don't want to be disappointed...

Oh, and max-kun should totally recover his Member status soon. I enjoyed your useful Gaming threads >.<
 

Kater

Banned
I think it looks more like the Moon emoji from WhatsApp.

http://33.media.tumblr.com/3d6730e8fb4c7ff7a86370b8bc6c67a3/tumblr_n04e9uXlSX1s6294bo1_500.png

Still, I think Thomas the train would be even creepier.

Today I'm not that grumpy for everything, as I am currently talking to someone somewhat special -- dunno if it will become anything, but it's a nice friendship nonetheless.

¡Por cierto! For those VN-Addicted people... Should I buy Hatoful Boyfriend?
I want it to be my first Steam purchase, but I don't want to be disappointed...

Oh, and max-kun should totally recover his Member status soon. I enjoyed your useful Gaming threads >.<
I didn't know... never used WhatsApp, though I've heard about the app before.


Also... YES, buy Hatoful Boyfriend!
The HD version is well worth it. &#128515;

tumblr_lverbtyJDX1r7osr9o1_r1_500.gif
 

Caladrius

Member
I stick to text eotes like a dignified internet person.

I am very shy, like "considered dropping his future-teacher career" level of shyness

I can definitely understand that. As I'm finding out though it's something that pretty much has to be worked around if you want to get far in life, though.

I think at least some of it you will probably like, a lot of it can be kind of oppressive but it's more like an oppressive sadness I guess :p I'm glad I wasn't a bother, lately I'm getting into this pattern where I have to explain like every feeling I have. It's weird.
.

Good. Melancholic music is generally good at helping me zone out when I need to (which isn't often, but still).

And it's good to share often, I think. As somebody who lives in a household that doesn't really communicate anything about we feel it's far preferable to not knowing what state anyone is in.

Drop the "hate", that's my advice. It's unhealthy. Humans are social creatures, we don't feel good when we isolate ourselves too much. Just read a little bit of (for example:) Schopenhauers late work and you will understand how badly you can damage a human mind with a lack of interaction with other humans.

For me it's a problem of not being able to trust that people are actually reciprocating interest as opposed to lying to spare my feelings (which Ironically upsets me a lot more than just telling me to leave)
 

mantidor

Member
Hope your status gets returned to Member soon enough, as I've already said in the PM. Gaming side needs the positive enthusiasm of yours for our shared hobby. &#128521;


Something unrelated, I just found this picture on tumblr.

tumblr_nesdhdwMFS1risghto1_500.png


Thought I'd share this with you since some people in here are LoZ fans. A funny little edit of the moon from Majora's Mask to make him look a bit more... friendly? (It's actually creepier that way, with the face of Thomas the Locomotive. &#128554; )

Moon emoji is everything.
 

Kevyt

Member
Big (free) concert going on right now downtown. Wished I had friends to go with! Seriously, every time I wanted to gang out with friends I always had to beg them. I guess friendships do die after some time.
 
Big (free) concert going on right now downtown. Wished I had friends to go with! Seriously, every time I wanted to gang out with friends I always had to beg them. I guess friendships do die after some time.

go to concert. make friends there. you'll have +1 interest already. if no friend. enjoy yourself first.
 

Kevyt

Member
go to concert. make friends there. you'll have +1 interest already. if no friend. enjoy yourself first.

True. It's the Concert For Valor in downtown DC. It's for veterans, and there's some big artists going such as Carrie Underwood, Eminem, Rihanna, and many others all of them of which I don't like or listen their music, lol. If I was going it would just be to have fun. Although I don't know how one can go to a concert and the music is not your cup of tea. But it's a big event with lots of people. It would have been fun.


Hey there Mr. Henchmen of the 21!
 
Just watched that new React video with the kids reacting to "old" cameras. How is a digital camera old? Should have shown them a Polaroid.

edit: Nvm. It was a polaroid.
 
True. It's the Concert For Valor in downtown DC. It's for veterans, and there's some big artists going such as Carrie Underwood, Eminem, Rihanna, and many others all of them of which I don't like or listen their music, lol. If I was going it would just be to have fun. Although I don't know how one can go to a concert and the music is not your cup of tea. But it's a big event with lots of people. It would have been fun.

Hey there Mr. Henchmen of the 21!
dont go lol
 
Everybody needs to get on my level.

What through me off was that it was one of those camera's from the 90s that had the auto zoom lens. The ones I remember that my mom had were the ones from the 70s. That's why I thought it was a digital camera at first.


what the fuck is that?

You've never seen one before? Watch any movie set in the 1800s. They usually have that cloth backing on it (too keep light out) and the flash pan. Hell watch Back to the Future pt.III and it has one.
 
I know you're saying this because of his verse about Lana Del Rey. And it sure is disgusting, I totally agree (that and the Ray Rice reference too).

But the truth is, Em was pretty great back then. There are some fantastic tunes in his whole discography.
It's not just the LDR thing, he's a homophobic and misogynistic piece of shit. I honestly don't care about how good he is.
 

Caladrius

Member
What through me off was that it was one of those camera's from the 90s that had the auto zoom lens. The ones I remember that my mom had were the ones from the 70s. That's why I thought it was a digital camera at first.
.

I've never actually seen an auto-zoom one before either.

My folks had a Polaroid back when me and my sister were children (In the mid-late 90's. We didn't get a more modern camera until about 2001.) Wish we hadn't thrown it away, would've been nice to show to my future nieces/nephews.

Actually fuck I need to find the floppy discs we used to have too.
 
I've never actually seen an auto-zoom one before either.

My folks had a Polaroid back when me and my sister were children (In the mid-late 90's. We didn't get a more modern camera until about 2001.) Wish we hadn't thrown it away, would've been nice to show to my future nieces/nephews.

Actually fuck I need to find the floppy discs we used to have too.

?
 

WonderzL

Banned
Yup. Used to have a dozen of 'em.

I had a Yellow one laying around here when I first moved into this house. Now I want to find it.

At least in Brazil, people of my age (18) usually are not familiar with floppy disks. But I find it odd because I used them a lot, probably due to an old and crappy PC I used to have. Now that I think about it, probably my first videogame experience was through a crappy game in a floppy disk?
 

mantidor

Member
At least in Brazil, people of my age (18) usually are not familiar with floppy disks. But I find it odd because I used them a lot, probably due to an old and crappy PC I used to have. Now that I think about it, probably my first videogame experience was through a crappy game in a floppy disk?

What do they think of the icon to save in Word? :p
 
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