AwesomePossum
Member
hey guys what do i do. my mom died today. my best friend and greatest enemy.
Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.
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I am very sorry for your loss. :/ Take as much time as you want to grief, that's the best advice I can give you. Can't say I know how I'd handle a situation like that.
AwesomePossum
Member
I wish I could offer a more complete response, but I have nothing. I've been depressed for a while, and posted once before, but this... this seems different. I'm still getting a little drunk. Alcohol makes it easier to deal with this in an non-emotional manner. As the oldest brother, I have no choice but to be the bedrock. It sucks having a poor, shit family.
You're a good person. Just make sure you allow yourself time to deal with it too, not just helping others. You deserve that. And you don't have to explain anything to us, not knowing how to feel/what to say is completely normal.
I'm really sorry to hear that, Possum. I don't know if this will work for you, but I've been finding writing very therapeutic lately. I just ruminate on stuff if it stays in my head, but if I can get it on paper, I can start to deal with it and make sense of it. Just open a notebook or Word and start writing. Or post something here.
DJ Lushious
Member
You're not dealing with anything by hitting the bottle. You're delaying or running away from something that is going to come back. Now is the time to stay away from drugs and alcohol and grieve. See a therapist, if you can. Talk to every friend and family you have. Cry this one out. You have a long road ahead of you during your mourning. You need to rely on your support structure.
And I am sorry for your loss.
toadsworth
Banned
I'm so sorry. You can get through this, don't be afraid to talk to someone.
I blew it, as usual. How can I be expected to understand other people when I can't even understand myself? SMDH
Sorry for your loss Possum. I can't even imagine how things would go here without my own mum, despite issues here and there. I echo Lush's thoughts, in that this would be the worst time to hit the bottle. Grieving is a very tough, but natural thing to go through. Once you opt to take it all away with alcohol, you may develop an even bigger problem in your life. Confide in a close friend or family member, or a therapist if you start to really struggle. Even PM someone here if you have to. You don't have to go through this alone.
On a personal note, I just want to say thanks for all the birthday wishes here. I really do appreciate it. Actually ventured outside, and had a decent day all round.
On a personal note, I just want to say thanks for all the birthday wishes here. I really do appreciate it. Actually ventured outside, and had a decent day all round.
Anxiety controlling my day again. Have an exam in a couple days but I can't study as I have my anxiety kinda stopping me dead in my tracks.
Last few days have been extremely tough. I dont even know what to do but damn anxiety attacks are killing me here.
Question for everyone, what are some tips/things you do when you're depressed to motivate one self? What about when you're incredibly anxious?
Last few days have been extremely tough. I dont even know what to do but damn anxiety attacks are killing me here.
Question for everyone, what are some tips/things you do when you're depressed to motivate one self? What about when you're incredibly anxious?
Cameron122
Member
I wish I lived closer to you so I could prove you wrong.
Well I was called handsome today, which was nice.
by a girl moving away
I know that feel. Congrats, and it's a lot easier when you make a habit of it.
That's a real tough one. I tend to motivate myself by giving myself some kind of reward and a good environment to study. "I'm going to have pancakes in the morning, then go to a cafe with my books and just spend a few hours there with no distractions except for coke and cookies."
It's hard to do with anxiety, but try to look at what needs to be done to study and break it down into smaller tasks. (Okay, today I'm going to read those sections I missed. Tomorrow, I'm going to type up my notes. The next day, I'll go over them.)
MisterLuffy
Member
I have a interview tomorrow at Target. I hope I do well. Right now I'm getting this uneasy feeling because I got a mail from Macy's to re-apply for holidays. That reminds me of my past bad experience there. I don't know if I want to work there. I just hope I get hired at Target.
ClassyPenguin
Banned
Coke and cookies. Lady, you disgust me.
I found a little pomodoro timer application on my computer helped me sit down for short, 25 minutes study sessions. It's a short amount of time to commit to working on school work so I find it breaks things down into shorter, more easily obtainable study goals. Even a physical kitchen timer that can go up to 25 minutes would be perfect. The physical act of setting the timer can help with getting over the "anxiety wall" that often holds one back.
Oh and making a list beforehand of what you would like to go over in each 25 minute time interval, and writing down how much you actually get done in each interval will help you to more effectively plan each study session and hopefully retain the material better too as you get a feel of what you can comfortable cover/work on in each 25 minute session. :3
Edit: I should note that I looked up and started trying the pomodoro technique/method after someone in this thread recently mentioned it.
Collete
Member
Better than my ex roommate who ate water and oreos...together.
DJ Lushious
Member
Saw a psychiatrist today. The best in the area and highly regarded. He prescribed Zoloft on top of my lithium and Wellbutrin. Oy vey!
I just hope it helps. I am up for anything at this point.
I just hope it helps. I am up for anything at this point.
I guess this is as good a thread as any to ask this: I don't feel like an interesting person anymore. I can be funny. I've never had any problem with that. But I want there to be more to me than just that. I've got way too much free time that I try to fill by spending time with friends, but obviously they can't always be available to hang out. I want to fill that extra time with hobbies, because I know that taking up hobbies is a good way to become interesting, but aside from gaming and maybe hiking, I don't know what I like anymore. Is it just that I haven't found something that I like to do as a hobby, or is it just that I'm losing my ability to find other things interesting? How would I go about fixing either of these? Any solutions would be appreciated, because I don't want to keep feeling like I'm bugging my friends to hang out every other day. I want to have my own active life back.
One suggestion is to think back on your childhood and look at what you enjoyed then. For example, I loved playing baseball and basketball as a kid, nowadays I just enjoy watching it and talking about it with friends, talking about trades or how certain teams/players are. Another example, i'm a huge sneakerhead. I'm pretty sure my sneaker collection is close to 70+ pairs. I absolutely love shoes, I can talk about shoes for HOURS. At work i'm known as the shoe guy and if anyone has questions regarding shoes, they come see me. I also love to go shopping, I like trying on clothes so a lot of my female friends enjoy shopping with me and talking about fashion in general. Being interesting doesn't have to mean you need to do a physical activity. It's definitely one way to become interesting but doesn't have to be the only way.
Well, it's almost been two weeks since I started my delicious, daily ration of Citalopram, and honestly, I do feel a difference. I find myself ruminating about my life a little less, I have a bit more energy to enjoy the things I want to do during my day, and subsequently find more time/willpower to do the more productive jobs I have around the house. The unfortunate problem I have is that next week, my CBT for my anxiety ends. So just as I start to find a small amount of desire to do something with my life, the other major component holding me back can't be addressed in the way I want to. I have two options, from my therapist. The first is to reapply for CBT in 3 months, which is the soonest I'd be able to. Then I'd go onto a waiting list. So I'm looking at 2014 for that to even start..
The second option presented is less straightforward to me, more of a psychoanalytical counselling mooted to me by my current therapist. I don't know much about it (I'll be asking him more next week), but it's a long-term form of therapy, i.e. 2 years, and I think that's more of what I want. I need some stability. Obviously, I seriously hope I'm better way before the 2 years has ended, but to have that long-term outlook on things, makes me feel easier than having the increased pressure of a short-term solution of reapplying for CBT. However, it's harder to get this kind of treatment, and it's a total tossup as to whether I'd even get it. As before, it'll take time on a waiting list to even start it.
Even with the anti-depressants starting to set in a little, it doesn't help that I feel life is conspiring against me. My appetite has been really up and down lately, sometimes I can barely eat a full portion of food, it's like my body (or my mind?) is willing against me telling me to give up. My therapist said this is probably psychosomatic ; I have my guesses as to what it is that's causing it, but it's difficult to find an answer for sure.
Like I say, it does feel like I have a bit more energy and desire, but.. everything and everyone seems out to upset me in their own way, I guess. I wanna be left alone but I don't wanna be lonely. I don't even know what I want out of my life any more. Just seems kinda pointless. I'll get better, and then.. what? ):
The second option presented is less straightforward to me, more of a psychoanalytical counselling mooted to me by my current therapist. I don't know much about it (I'll be asking him more next week), but it's a long-term form of therapy, i.e. 2 years, and I think that's more of what I want. I need some stability. Obviously, I seriously hope I'm better way before the 2 years has ended, but to have that long-term outlook on things, makes me feel easier than having the increased pressure of a short-term solution of reapplying for CBT. However, it's harder to get this kind of treatment, and it's a total tossup as to whether I'd even get it. As before, it'll take time on a waiting list to even start it.
Even with the anti-depressants starting to set in a little, it doesn't help that I feel life is conspiring against me. My appetite has been really up and down lately, sometimes I can barely eat a full portion of food, it's like my body (or my mind?) is willing against me telling me to give up. My therapist said this is probably psychosomatic ; I have my guesses as to what it is that's causing it, but it's difficult to find an answer for sure.
Like I say, it does feel like I have a bit more energy and desire, but.. everything and everyone seems out to upset me in their own way, I guess. I wanna be left alone but I don't wanna be lonely. I don't even know what I want out of my life any more. Just seems kinda pointless. I'll get better, and then.. what? ):
Sorry for your loss. When mine passed, I made a thread asking what to do, people were generally pretty helpful.
In light of my still-erratic behavior and mounting health problems, some of my medication is being changed. Not sure how I feel about this since it will probably take like another half year to wean off and ramp up on new medication, which means it'll be some shitty times at work, and I'll get a lot of shit from my manager. I've gone through the medication switching and it's always a pain in the ass. They all have big side effects and it seems to be a matter of finding a drug that has ones you can live with. It's starting to seem like I can either have something like stability or good physical health, but not both. At least it's the weekend.
DJ Lushious
Member
Does your manager know about your issues and medication? Or HR?
I know not everyone is in my boat, but my boss knows about my depression and my medicine (though I've not told him exactly which). I've cried in his office more than a few times. :-/ He's been pretty understanding about it and gives me as much leeway as he can.
That is gorgeous. Sell me that!
smokeandmirrors
Banned
Time to go clothes shopping and see how bad shit's gotten :\
i really gotta lose this weight...
i really gotta lose this weight...
You are really improving, Collete.
BigEvilTurtle
Banned
Wow, this looks super nice.
I'm currently on 300 mg of Wellbutrin and I've been feeling very fatigued and anxious lately. Depression seems to be fading but I still feel quite tired, anxious, and irritable. Are these temporary? If not, how can I alleviate them?
That's a great one!
ClassyPenguin
Banned
That's possibly my favorite of yours Collete.
MisterLuffy
Member
Man I have an interview in an hour. I'm kind of nervous. I've read some info on what to expect of the interview at Target from people's experience. I feel uneasy right after reading them, I might not be what they're looking for because of my anxiety. I just hope I do well, and whatever the outcome is...I'll accept it. Like my cousin said the other time, I have to stay positive which is hard for me to do, but I'll try.
Agent Cooper
Member
i have the house to myself until sunday night OwO
ClassyPenguin
Banned
Party at Coops. All the alcohols.
ClassyPenguin
Banned
ALL OF THEM!
Agent Cooper
Member
make sure you use coasters.
ClassyPenguin
Banned
nerd
in, before you want to fight?
in, before you want to fight?
masturbate in every room
You are no longer invited to my house.
MisterLuffy
Member
I just came back from the interview, it didn't go so well. My answers were crap, I don't even remember if I smiled or not. For some reason I felt relieved and at the same time disappointed. Before the interview, I hoped that I would get hired. When I got there, I got this feeling that I don't want to work there for some reason. I hate these mixed feelings.
Agent Cooper
Member
Collete
Member
I would if I had 300 dollars originally in my bank account.
(so I wouldn't be charged for keeping it open)
I liked that one
Aww thanks you guys! All your words really make me think people actually look at my work and support it lol.
What I would do was bang up my nerdy music real loud when I have the dorm room to myself.
Good times.
ClassyPenguin
Banned
That's the first thing I do when moving in to a new place.
Collete
Member
I really needed that image in my head Classy.../sarcasm
How are your f's so fucking pretty.
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