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Mental Health |OT2| - Light in the Darkness

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I feel like all of the stress and anxiety from my current life has decided to ball up in my chest today and give me a heart attack. What I can handle mentally I might not be able to take physically.
 

Hamarr

Neo Member
I feel like all of the stress and anxiety from my current life has decided to ball up in my chest today and give me a heart attack. What I can handle mentally I might not be able to take physically.

Panic attacks suck. Do you have a doctor that can get you something to take as needed? Xanax or something? Those suck to take when you need to be somewhere, but I found they helped with my panic attacks.

I'd recommend to try and stay out of the hotel if you can. Keep yourself occupied so you can avoid the opportunity for those dark thoughts to manifest while you handle your housing issue. And I'm sure that it won't take too long to get resolved. Just think how happy your dog will be to see you again!

Thanks for the advice. My brother will be out of town, but I will try to find something to do. Maybe see a movie on my own, or go to church. I'm no longer religious, but it might help to be around people.
 

spons

Member
Was tested by the government's health care and insurance agency (UWV) not long ago and deemed 'Duurzaam arbeidsongeschikt' (completely unfit for work) and 'Geen arbeidsvermogen' (no possible change in ability to work in the future). The doctor who tested me told me it's rare for people to be the approved for the latter these days, especially with my form of welfare check (Wajong, which is for people who got their disability before the age of 18).

The test took about an hour and was just talk since I didn't need to get a physical because of autism and chronic depression. And since I was born with autism and there's no cure, I finally got the stamp of approval for the monthly disability check.

I never have to get checked again. I will never have to work. I'm so goddamn glad I can finally do things on my own regard and whenever I feel like, not being dictated by the government.

It's horrid because many people did not pass the test. The agency might say they're unfit for work now ('arbeidsongeschikt'), but not deemed to be unfit for a longer period of time ("arbeidsvermogen") as it's possible this may change for them in the future, and starting next year, their check gets cut from 75% of the minimum wage to 70%. Luckily, this is not the case for me.

The next step is an attempt at group therapy. Since my social skills are almost completely absent, this will be difficult as heck, but it most likely is for the better. At the very least, I can say I've tried afterwards. I also got a coach which I do things with such as groceries or just walk around in a nearby forest or around the lake here, talking about life and the problems surrounding it.

I was initially worried that the doctor might not understand my problems, but all in all they really actually did. I've read a lot of crap about the UWV beforehand but it's less worse than it might seem.
 
So this is my last summer vacation, with my last semester of college coming up in two weeks.

The good is that up at school I have groups of friends to do stuff with.

The bad is that this summer has proven that there's nothing for me at home. None of my friends want to do anything, and no one in my family shares similar interests with me at all. Plus my school friends have busy schedules and live hours away.

I've had a great internship, a contributing editor gig and have another paying job but all I've done this summer (besides a week down the shore with family and hanging out with friends twice) is work.

Once I graduate and come back home there's gonna be nothing for me other than working (if I even get a job out of college lol). I want more out of my life. I feel bad every day that I'm not at work. I feel like I have no purpose whenever I'm not at work.
 
Tomorrow's the day I finally talk to my psychologist about pursuing an autism diagnosis. I'm pretty nervous. Only recently did I acknowledge the possibility that my social issues could be a result of anything other than anxiety and depression. Hope it goes well.
 

Astral Dog

Member
I swear life isn't worth every crap I have to go through. There is no light at the end of the tunnel
There must be something worth living for neo.help others beat the fascism tearing the country apart.show the people that hurt you on their faces that you are stronger. Enjoy new days for the beauty they provide, learn something new.
 

Hamarr

Neo Member
I got sick of waiting for the very slow moving process at a couple of different apartment complexes and tried applying for one that I expected to be a longshot. They accepted me within a few hours. It's more expensive, but I can move in a couple of weeks earlier, so the cost difference for the entire year would have been eaten away by having to live out of a hotel until 9/8.

The other place finally accepted me a couple of hours after the new place. The cost difference with the pet fee between the two ends up only being $30, so the place I have chosen to move into is only a little more expensive per month, a lot closer to work, and a lot nicer apartment complex.

My only concern now is being on the third floor and whether my dog will be able to handle going up and down the stairs every time he needs to go out. He seemed to handle the stairs at the hotel okay after the first time. I am hoping he gets everything out of his system if I walk him a couple of times a day once I move in.

Now that the weight of finding a new place is gone, I am mentally going back to all the other self-criticism: I am too fat, I am too ugly, no one will ever love me, etc. On the plus side, I met with my counselor again for teh first time in a few weeks and caught her up on all of the recent changes.

I am excited to have thrown off the old house, and all the baggage that went along with it being my mom's before I bought it. Throwing out years of stuff was really cathartic, and I am feeling like I can start over and make things my own at the new place.

Now I just need to work on not being isolated when I move, and finding ways to build up my self confidence and social skills. I am planning on walking or biking to work once I move. I am excited about trying to start a healthier lifestyle. I am sick of eating garbage at the hotel.
 
Tomorrow's the day I finally talk to my psychologist about pursuing an autism diagnosis. I'm pretty nervous. Only recently did I acknowledge the possibility that my social issues could be a result of anything other than anxiety and depression. Hope it goes well.


Conversation with the therapist today re: autism stuff was not... the most... fruitful. Though I can't entirely place the blame on her since I had to shelve the discussion until the last 10 or so minutes of my session today. I was well aware in advance that she wasn't of the opinion that I had autism, but I was hoping I would at least be able to have a constructive conversation with her about it. Unfortunately, she didn't really seem to be entirely aware of the nuances of the condition and kept trying to tie my symptoms back to anxiety. That said, she never claimed autism was in her expertise, so perhaps I expected a bit too much. At the very least, she was supportive of my belief that my issues with social interaction had roots deeper than my depression and anxiety, and she encouraged me to pursue a formal consultation with someone who specializes in autism (and she provided me with the phone number of someone nearby that I could contact). I'll be giving them a call tomorrow. The journey continues.
 

jb1234

Member
Conversation with the therapist today re: autism stuff was not... the most... fruitful. Though I can't entirely place the blame on her since I had to shelve the discussion until the last 10 or so minutes of my session today. I was well aware in advance that she didn't wasn't of the opinion that I had autism, but I was hoping I would at least be able to have a constructive conversation with her about it. Unfortunately, she didn't really seem to be entirely aware of the nuances of the condition and kept trying to tie my symptoms back to anxiety. That said, she never claimed autism was in her expertise, so perhaps I expected a bit too much. At the very least, she was supportive of my belief that my issues with social interaction had roots deeper than my depression and anxiety, and she encouraged me to pursue a formal consultation with someone who specializes in autism (and she provided me with the phone number of someone nearby that I could contact). I'll be giving them a call tomorrow. The journey continues.

Yeah, I didn't get a diagnosis (Aspergers) until I was taken to a specialist who knew exactly what he was doing. He mostly just had me play board games with him and observed my behavior.
 

Skellybroski88

Neo Member
Need to vent

2 weeks ago I go to my first session. Paid completely through my employer. Today was suppose to be my second session, but they decide last night to call and say that the employer actually pays for my counselor at her OTHER office and my appointment is canceled today. Thank you for waiting until the last fucking minute so I now have to reschedule several more weeks out. I've had an extremely dark week and on the verge of cutting myself again, but sure thing you fuckheads, I'll just wait another 2+ weeks.
 
Need to vent

2 weeks ago I go to my first session. Paid completely through my employer. Today was suppose to be my second session, but they decide last night to call and say that the employer actually pays for my counselor at her OTHER office and my appointment is canceled today. Thank you for waiting until the last fucking minute so I now have to reschedule several more weeks out. I've had an extremely dark week and on the verge of cutting myself again, but sure thing you fuckheads, I'll just wait another 2+ weeks.

Far out that sucks :( Who cares what office it goes through?! Hang in there :)
 

Pixeluh

Member
I have to get my wisdom teeth removed in less than a week and I'm so scared. I have to use local because of financial reasons, but the oral surgeon made me feel terrible for not being able to get put to sleep. Is the procedure that bad? I feel like my anxiety is hyping it up to be terrible but I don't know how to stay calm. It's 5 days away but it is the only constant thought I have been having. My body has been in a state of worry the past 2 days and I'm so tired.. Taking out teeth seems to un-natural to me....
 
Anybody recover from being bullied as a child? I was bullied all through middle and high school and it has severely fucked my life up to the point where I just want to give up on it.
 

FiggyCal

Banned
I have to get my wisdom teeth removed in less than a week and I'm so scared. I have to use local because of financial reasons, but the oral surgeon made me feel terrible for not being able to get put to sleep. Is the procedure that bad? I feel like my anxiety is hyping it up to be terrible but I don't know how to stay calm. It's 5 days away but it is the only constant thought I have been having. My body has been in a state of worry the past 2 days and I'm so tired.. Taking out teeth seems to un-natural to me....

I was put to sleep for mine. But you got to figure it's pretty routine. There's at least a million threads about this on neogaf alone.
 

Violet_0

Banned
I have to get my wisdom teeth removed in less than a week and I'm so scared. I have to use local because of financial reasons, but the oral surgeon made me feel terrible for not being able to get put to sleep. Is the procedure that bad? I feel like my anxiety is hyping it up to be terrible but I don't know how to stay calm. It's 5 days away but it is the only constant thought I have been having. My body has been in a state of worry the past 2 days and I'm so tired.. Taking out teeth seems to un-natural to me....

completely painless. I had two broken molars removed along with two wisdom teeth because hey we're already at this. Two sessions, in a neighboring country for cost-cutting reasons. The dentist was rather annoyed because of my gag-reflex, took a little while longer but it was fine otherwise. But I'm not a squeamish person. A local anesthetic is completely sufficient, you won't feel any pain, you just have be okay with your dentist drilling in your mouth
 

Pixeluh

Member
completely painless. I had two broken molars removed along with two wisdom teeth because hey we're already at this. Two sessions, in a neighboring country for cost-cutting reasons. The dentist was rather annoyed because of my gag-reflex, took a little while longer but it was fine otherwise. But I'm not a squeamish person. A local anesthetic is completely sufficient, you won't feel any pain, you just have be okay with your dentist drilling in your mouth

Yeah, I'm cool with the drilling. I had a root canal previously and didn't mind it at all, and that used a ton of drilling! Maybe it seems worse than it really will be.
 

Hamarr

Neo Member
Yeah, I'm cool with the drilling. I had a root canal previously and didn't mind it at all, and that used a ton of drilling! Maybe it seems worse than it really will be.

My friends like to joke that no one has a good wisdom tooth story. Though, it seems there are fewer complications if you get it done when you're relatively young? Most of the people I know having issues are in their 30s.

Does anyone have any advice for finding a good therapist?

I've had two and I haven't really been satisfied with either of them.

The first one was a psychologist who was way too expensive. I found that she classified me in this little bubble (social anxiety) and tried to approach all of my concerns and issues from that mindset. I don't believe my anxiety is strictly social and I experience it in situations that don't relate to others. She kept trying to jam me in that box though and I found it really disenchanting.

The second was a publicly-funded counsellor, who was thankfully free vs. the $250/session I was paying with the previous, but I found that she moved glacially slow in the treatment and we really didn't touch on my issues at all. Felt like she was just working out of a textbook and we really didn't touch on the issues that are specific to me. She just really generically taught me CBT skills like doing a thought record. This took a month to complete, just how to do a thought record. I quit after a few months of this. I really just got a sense she was there to bill the gov't for as many sessions as possible. Maybe it's unfair, but that's how I felt.

So... all that in mind, I'm feeling kind of disenchanted regarding therapy. I know it often takes quite a few therapists before you find one that clicks, but it's still disappointing.

I forgot to reply to this earlier.

Do you have an idea of the type of treatment you want, and do you have insurance to cover the visits? I ended up spending a bit of time looking through counselors on http://therapists.pyschologytoday.com for people that had experience with the type of issues or therapy I would like to try and then checked to see if they were on the list of providers in my network. That at least narrowed down the list of people worth trying to see.

The site also tells you how much they charge per hour.
 
It's too much, I can't bear it anymore. It's almost funny that something simple like my handy that just died finally broke me. With that I've lost a lot of good memories, lots of pictures I could look at and see that there was a time when I was not a complete mess and actually happy.
I said it here before, but I really disappointed too many people in my lifetime. I've been in a pretty bad mood for the last few days but today I've hit rock bottom. I'm drunk and for the first time in months I just went to my box of old memories.
Man, we've had some good times and I am the sole reason why it did not work out. I*ve always been my biggest obstacle, be it my career or my private life.
I could have achieved a lot more but I am cunt that keeps ruining everything that's good in my life.
If I could travel back in time everything would turn out for the better, but I've had my shot at happiness and fucked it up.

Fuck this. I realized that I was never truly happy except those four years and nothing will ever make it feel better. I am done.
 
I broke down in tears in front of my mother. Told her about my depression & anxiety and my suicidal thoughts. We had a long talk and my family is gonna help me get better. So things are looking up?
 
It's too much, I can't bear it anymore. It's almost funny that something simple like my handy that just died finally broke me. With that I've lost a lot of good memories, lots of pictures I could look at and see that there was a time when I was not a complete mess and actually happy.
I said it here before, but I really disappointed too many people in my lifetime. I've been in a pretty bad mood for the last few days but today I've hit rock bottom. I'm drunk and for the first time in months I just went to my box of old memories.
Man, we've had some good times and I am the sole reason why it did not work out. I*ve always been my biggest obstacle, be it my career or my private life.
I could have achieved a lot more but I am cunt that keeps ruining everything that's good in my life.
If I could travel back in time everything would turn out for the better, but I've had my shot at happiness and fucked it up.

Fuck this. I realized that I was never truly happy except those four years and nothing will ever make it feel better. I am done.
How about you talk about what specifically you do that holds you back? Let's work through this together; you can tell us, or you can PM me! Please don't give up, we and others care for you!

I'm not sure what country you're from, but if you'd rather talk with someone over the phone, please look up a suicide prevention hotline number and call them right away. Life can still be worth living, trust me.
 

jdstorm

Banned
Anybody recover from being bullied as a child? I was bullied all through middle and high school and it has severely fucked my life up to the point where I just want to give up on it.

Yes.

I still have a bunch of issues, but for me the bullying issues and self esteem issues that went with it went away. For me the best way was to confront the lies my brain was telling me with truth. I found myself part of a good group of people and eventually the encouragement and support (and bady needed hygene tips) allowed me to grow enough as a person, and to find the courage to be brave and accept that i was a person with agency who got to live my life on my own terms and was not defined by those who intended me harm (either physical, emotional or any other kind of harm)
 

Hamarr

Neo Member
I hate my brain.

I start my the day in my new place, get to watch the eclipse at 99% totality while out shopping, then pick up my dog from boarding. I spent the day with him since I haven't seen him in two weeks and want to help him adjust to the new place.

After all that, I spend a couple of hours thinking of how much I want to kill myself. There's a lot of new stuff happening and some possibility for change, and I keep going back to this. I don't know if I will ever stop hating myself.
 

neojubei

Will drop pants for Sony.
There must be something worth living for neo.help others beat the fascism tearing the country apart.show the people that hurt you on their faces that you are stronger. Enjoy new days for the beauty they provide, learn something new.

Taking stock in my life and seeing myself fail my goals. i think i should get out of life. there really isnt anything here for me. I have no significant other, no kids, no life. if i even make it to old age im just going to rot in some nursing home alone looking out of the window. my last day of therapy is next week. i've decided to cancel it. it wasn't working anyway. if i die and be reincarnated into someone else im fine with that, if i go to hell, im ok with that, if i just cease to exist that would even be better.
 

neojubei

Will drop pants for Sony.
Trying to debate whether living alone forever or dying is better. Sucks to not have a significant other and be someone that other people don't like. Death seems better.
 
So my list of friends is getting smaller every day. One of my closest best friends and I stopped talking at the beginning of this year, today I was finally unfollowed which shouldn't bother me as much as it does but, it kinda finalizes it. Idk it really feels like I'm gonna be left with no one soon, in some ways I'm happy about it. The fewer people in my life the fewer mistakes I can make, but it's lonely and I feel really lonely other than the few I have.

Hell locally I literally only have one friend left, maybe it's what I deserve hell when I lose him maybe it's for the best, I really don't know. I will not be surprised if 15 years from now I become Jim Carry in "the cable guy" haha, just begging strangers for a friend while I make video game references and get on their nerves. I won't kill myself I only have to get through the one life but I'm ready for a job and some progression for my goals. But I'm down and I really want a friend out side of internet people. I mean I love them but you can't share a beer with someone out of state or just be in the same room.
 

Wag

Member
I've been going to Meetups regularly for the last 2yrs or so and it's helped my anxiety and depression greatly. I recently told a group of people I've gotten to know well at Meetups about my mental health issues and they were OK with it.

I highly recommend people getting out- trying Meetups, or some other group activity. Isolating is the worst possible thing to do if you're anxious and depressed.

Even though I can't work right now because of physical problems, it's good for my state of mind to get out once in a while and socialize.
 
I've been going to Meetups regularly for the last 2yrs or so and it's helped my anxiety and depression greatly. I recently told a group of people I've gotten to know well at Meetups about my mental health issues and they were OK with it.

I highly recommend people getting out- trying Meetups, or some other group activity. Isolating is the worst possible thing to do if you're anxious and depressed.

Even though I can't work right now because of physical problems, it's good for my state of mind to get out once in a while and socialize.

I really appreciate the idea, I think once I find work I'll look into something. Honestly it just never occurred to me.
 

neojubei

Will drop pants for Sony.
I've been going to Meetups regularly for the last 2yrs or so and it's helped my anxiety and depression greatly. I recently told a group of people I've gotten to know well at Meetups about my mental health issues and they were OK with it.

I highly recommend people getting out- trying Meetups, or some other group activity. Isolating is the worst possible thing to do if you're anxious and depressed.

Even though I can't work right now because of physical problems, it's good for my state of mind to get out once in a while and socialize.

Social gatherings never work out for me.
 

Wag

Member
Social gatherings never work out for me.

Isolating won't help. I appreciate that it's hard in the beginning, but I found Meetups in particular to draw a diverse, accepting crowd.

Either way it's still better to be uncomfortable in a crowd than by yourself all the time.

Give it a shot, the worst that can happen is it doesn't work out and you can try something else.
 
Exposure therapy is great, but honestly? The current state of politics/life in the United States right now have made meeting and keeping friends extremely stressful? Like every time I go to a gathering I get immediate mini Milkshake Ducks? Hell, I haven't been able to keep family members around because they think our biracial queer kid is an abomination that's against God's will.

Harvey is especially bad, because it was predicted and they did not put in the ounce of prevention that's worth a pound of cure. People are dead and dying and losing everything because of this. And we're way overdue for Cascadia Subduction Zone and San Andreas Fault megaquakes and overdue for Yellowstone Caldera Supervolcano eruption along with a ton of other stuff that humans have caused or made worse through environmental/climate change, and you bet your sweet bippy that the current Ruling Class is already making these extremely likely disasters' eventual outcomes more disastrous every day, seemingly out of spite and racism.

Last week, I felt happy for the first time since the election (for someone else who was having a great birthday) and I didn't know what to do with the feeling so I drank it away. It is the first time since the election that I've had alcohol at all. Family history of substance abuse and I'm on at least three meds at all times now, so I try to limit it or at least drink when it won't interact with what I'm taking.

I'm just full of this stuff to the point of bursting and doing things to take my mind off of it works... but only while I'm doing them. So I'm posting it in the hopes that putting it outside of myself will help. I'm just so angry/anxious/depressed.

Going to do some serious luxury (for me) self care this week. I might even have some soda with real sugar in.
 
I've never felt worse in my whole life. it's all such a cliche but it hurts so bad when they don't want you. I don't have anyone else to talk to so thanks for letting me vent, mental health thread. hope you guys have a good Monday.
 

Menthuss

Member
I've never felt worse in my whole life. it's all such a cliche but it hurts so bad when they don't want you. I don't have anyone else to talk to so thanks for letting me vent, mental health thread. hope you guys have a good Monday.

Feel free to share. Nobody here is going to judge you.
Talking about it (or at least posting it) might make you feel better.
 
I've been going to Meetups regularly for the last 2yrs or so and it's helped my anxiety and depression greatly. I recently told a group of people I've gotten to know well at Meetups about my mental health issues and they were OK with it.

I highly recommend people getting out- trying Meetups, or some other group activity. Isolating is the worst possible thing to do if you're anxious and depressed.

Even though I can't work right now because of physical problems, it's good for my state of mind to get out once in a while and socialize.

I looked into it and am too young to attend most of the events I saw
 

neojubei

Will drop pants for Sony.
Isolating won't help. I appreciate that it's hard in the beginning, but I found Meetups in particular to draw a diverse, accepting crowd.

Either way it's still better to be uncomfortable in a crowd than by yourself all the time.

Give it a shot, the worst that can happen is it doesn't work out and you can try something else.

seems that site wants me to include a photo of myself, which is impossible. Looked at all the meetups in my area and none apply to me. I have no talents or hobbies.
 
Sigh. My older cat is currently being checked out at the vet. When I arrived home this morning, she looked like shit. Weak and wheezing. Barely able to support herself.

She's been my baby since I was in elementary school. I can't lose her right now. I don't need this right now.
 
2017 is taking its toll on me.

My girlfriend, who Ive known for 4 years and together 1, has been pregnant all of 2017 and we are a week away. The pregnancy has been very hard on her, not being able to sleep, throwing up every day and being very distant. We've had sex once this year.

During this time, my new director at work came in and just flat out had it out for me, coordinating with the supervisor in our office to basically bust me for anything and everything while others got away with murder. This came to a head when I was let go this past Friday, less than one week from the baby arriving.

Now, one business day later, my girlfriend is apparently at her wits end that I dont have another job already. Guess I shouldnt tell her the other time I had to search for a job took 7 months? Yeah.

Also recently, my sister, who lives with my mom, brought a guy friend over while my mom wasnt home and he cleared her out of all the jewelry my grandmother left her. The necklace is gone, but NINE rings are with pawn shops, and no one has the money to buy back my moms jewelry. I was going to take out a small loan, but now Ive lost my job. This has taken a HUGE toll on my mom, who was depressed before this. Those rings are kinda all she had.

So now Im unemployed, baby in a week, girlfriend who is sick, but distant and already pissed two three days in, and my mom who is now deeply depressed and Im pissed at my sister for taking no actions to fix the situation.

Ive never, in my life, had a stretch of time that Im pouring everything I have into it, and not only getting nothing back, but moving backwards as fast as possible. I have no clue how Im going to make it through this financially. Or mentally. And that is affecting me physically.
 
I've never posted here before, but I don't really know who else to talk to. I don't know what to do anymore.

I had a pretty bad depression bout a while ago. I failed out of college, I was still living at home, and I was obese. I got pretty close to ending it all, but I ended up reaching out to a friend who encouraged me to get help, and tell my friends and family. Most of my friends and family were really awesome about it (Save for two assholes who I promptly cut out of my life) and I started going to therapy.

Fast foreword to today and everything that I had an issue with then is either solved, or in the process of getting solved. I went back to college, and I'm doing better in school then I ever had in my life, I moved into my own apartment, I started working out, and I still have a bunch of friends who have been there for me, but my mental state has been in free fall since this summer, and I have no idea why. At least before I had something to better myself in, but I don't even know what I would fix in my life now. I've told a few friends that I've been having a problem with depression again, but I don't think they understand the gravity of it. I don't think I want to die, I don't think I'm going to kill myself, but I don't want to live anymore, and I don't know how to handle this. I woke up from a nap a bit ago to this feeling of soul crushing depression, and I just want this pain to stop.

I keep thinking I should go to the hospital, but I'm worried about missing school, which doesn't even make sense, because that clearly means I'm not going to kill myself, so why go to the hospital.
 
I've never posted here before, but I don't really know who else to talk to. I don't know what to do anymore.

I had a pretty bad depression bout a while ago. I failed out of college, I was still living at home, and I was obese. I got pretty close to ending it all, but I ended up reaching out to a friend who encouraged me to get help, and tell my friends and family. Most of my friends and family were really awesome about it (Save for two assholes who I promptly cut out of my life) and I started going to therapy.

Fast foreword to today and everything that I had an issue with then is either solved, or in the process of getting solved. I went back to college, and I'm doing better in school then I ever had in my life, I moved into my own apartment, I started working out, and I still have a bunch of friends who have been there for me, but my mental state has been in free fall since this summer, and I have no idea why. At least before I had something to better myself in, but I don't even know what I would fix in my life now. I've told a few friends that I've been having a problem with depression again, but I don't think they understand the gravity of it. I don't think I want to die, I don't think I'm going to kill myself, but I don't want to live anymore, and I don't know how to handle this. I woke up from a nap a bit ago to this feeling of soul crushing depression, and I just want this pain to stop.

I keep thinking I should go to the hospital, but I'm worried about missing school, which doesn't even make sense, because that clearly means I'm not going to kill myself, so why go to the hospital.
Hi. I'm probably not the person to be responding, but you might want to visit therapy again. It could be a chemical thing as opposed to an environment thing; it could just be something unresolved. I don't know. If you're feeling that bad, though, I hope you get some help. Schools often have counselor programs for students, so I guess that's an option. Again, though, I'm probably not the guy to be giving advice.
 
I don't know if it's just my anxiety/depression/over-sensitivity, but I feel bothered when people appropriate the word "trigger" by making light of it, using it in exaggerated situations, and minimizing the word.

In a way, I feel like people who use the word devalidate my issues, making me feel that my mental illness is trivial or insignificant.

I feel both the right and the left (even though I am hesitant to conflate the two, I feel this is a fair accusation) use the word to make fun of the other side. "Conseratives are triggered by blah blah..." "Libtards are triggered by blah blah"

It's like the appropriation of PTSD but even worse since the connotation of triggered in the above contexts is something that people should be bad for doing instead of a symptom that's minimized in context but one is not denigrated for (oh, I got PTSD from my past exam).

I am a college student, and I understand the stereotype that some students can be overly politically correct (e.g. "snowflake"). However, there is an intersection between mental illness and academia that I feel people do not recognize, and some students do not want to be overly sensitive to things. They did not ask for mental illness.

What do other people think? Am I being overly sensitive?
 
Sorry to double post, but these two issues were bothering me lately, and I thought separating the posts would make it easier to parse through.

Anyway, do any of you feel guilty or ashamed for asking for accommodations in a work/school environment? I know it is not a healthy mindset to have, but I am hesitant to ask for help due to a stigma or my personal pride saying, "Oh, you should be able to do this on your own. Mental health is not a true handicap."

I started thinking about this from reading the recent thread on asking for a regrade. I started feeling scared that I should not do that seeing the response to the OP in that thread. I asked for accommodations before on extended time on exams and assignments and being separated from the larger group of students when I take exams, but I feel that my anxiety and depression interferes with information that I retain.

I took a CS final last summer, but prior, I was going through high depression and anxiety due to my parents fighting and separating and financial aid issues due to my past withdrawal. However, I claimed everything was fine, and I told them all I need is the usual accommodations. I didn't want to delay the exam as that would raise my anxiety higher, and I felt like I already asked for too much. I didn't do well or at least as good as I thought I could do due events that happened prior. I did get an A- in the class though which was really good though but missed the A by 5 points out of 300. I wondered if I should ask if they could bump my grade, but seeing that instructors do not like being asked that question, I decided not to ask. And seeing that an A- is already really good, I felt petty and bad for thinking I need to ask for an A.

I am trying to be more assertive with my professors from now on, but I am wondering how much is too much. I am starting to feel incompetent to keep asking for accommodations. How do you all rationalize getting accommodations and not feeling bad for doing so? And if you are an instructor or professor of any kind, can give your two cents on your experiences with disabled students and accommodations?
 
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