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[AngmarsKing701]

Stretch (2014) - this is aggressively mediocre. Limo driver trying to kick addition habits and pay off his debt tries to score massive tip from a bizarre billionaire (played by Chris Pine who continues to impress with a wide range of odd roles at times). Repetitively worse things happen to limo driver until climax ensues. Jessica Alba is in it looking casually hot in a desk chair.

2 / 5

 

[More_Badass]

Rats (2017}

The concept was compelling, but executing was lacking. While there are grossly fascinating sections and stories, the documentary was more on researching rats and ways to stop them than on rats themselves. But the sections in New York and on the different ways to hunt and outsmart them were all very interesting. You might never want to walk down a Manhattan street again after watching this

But if you ever wanted to see rats killed and cooked as a delicacy for dinner, this is the documentary to watch

 

[Icolin]

So I saw mother! I'm just going to let in sink in for a week, go see it again, and then come back here with a review because while I think I really enjoyed what I watched... there's so much to unpack and I need a second viewing to properly judge it.

Can't say I was bored by it.

 

[AngmarsKing701]

Extraction (2015) - I imagine Bruce Willis looking at himself in the mirror every morning and saying to himself, "For fuck sake, Bruce. Was your soul really worth this?"

The answer is no. No it wasn't. And yet you sold it anyway. A 14 year old with limited English skills wrote this script after watching way too many action movies. There is zero chemistry here. Someone reads a line, the next person reads their line, then the next person, and so on. This might have been a table reading of this script with no one in the same room at the same table.

It is horrendous. Laughably so at times. The "twist" isn't a twist.

Just ... avoid this. The only redeeming thing to this is that it's like 78 minutes long. If letterboxd allowed 0 stars this one would get that.

0.5 / 5

 

[MidnightCowboy]

Twin Peaks The Return Part 8

Probably the best thing I've seen this year? God bless you David

 

[lordxar]

Onibaba There is clearly some high production value here but this really didn't strike me as a horror film so much as an Akira Kurosawa film with boobs and blood. I really enjoyed seeing the grass flowing in the wind and the character interactions but this wasn't much different than any other drama.

Now the story itself was very cool. Couple women alone in a warring nation kill off wounded samurai and dump the bodies so they can sell off whatever they find. The downside to this was the ending. Things kind of go off the rails then just end. Seems like there should have been a little more resolution.

 

[Fancy Clown]

Onibaba There is clearly some high production value here but this really didn't strike me as a horror film so much as an Akira Kurosawa film with boobs and blood. I really enjoyed seeing the grass flowing in the wind and the character interactions but this wasn't much different than any other drama.

Now the story itself was very cool. Couple women alone in a warring nation kill off wounded samurai and dump the bodies so they can sell off whatever they find. The downside to this was the ending. Things kind of go off the rails then just end. Seems like there should have been a little more resolution.

I dunno, it felt like a horror movie to me. The constant atmosphere of dispair and isolation...the unsettling music, and then obviously the stuff in the third act going full on horror. If you liked this you should check out Kuroneko though, it's also a horror inflected Samurai film.

 

[Window]

Twin Peaks The Return Part 8

Probably the best thing I've seen this year? God bless you David

Got a light?

I think Lynch is a bit too cynical about modern technology but it's difficult to argue when you use the Atomic Bond as evidence of that I guess.

 

[g11]

Baby Driver. Honestly, I don't get the unbridled love for this movie. There's nothing revolutionary about the driving scenes and they are few and far between while the plot is pretty slipshod. There's almost no depth of character to anybody in the film, with the heistmen being particularly one-dimensional and cartoonish. "Hey, you're pretty great at driving but you listen to music all the time. What are you, retarded?" About the only thing about any of them that felt real is the constant dick-wagging. They all come off as losers who saw Reservoir Dogs one time too many and all want to be Mr. Blonde. The acting is pretty rote, with Baby himself and Deborah forgetting their southern accents every other scene and everybody else just acting like as big an asshole as they can manage the majority of the movie.

The late movie leaps of logic on the part of

Spoiler

Jamie Foxx's "Bats"

are truly amazing. If he's that clairvoyant, ("I can just tell by looking at you, Buddy, that you used to be on Wall Street, you ran out on your wife and kids with your favorite stripper and you know someone who can fence these money orders"), he should just play the lottery. All topped off by the completely uncharacteristic turn of

Spoiler

Spacey's "Doc"

, and I'm left truly baffled why this movie got so much praise. As far as I can see, the most impressive things it had going for it were a decent soundtrack and a solid opening credit sequence. Probably Wright's worst showing IMO barring Scott Pilgrim. Literally the only thing it has over Drive is that it's not quite up its own ass as much.

 

[lordxar]

I dunno, it felt like a horror movie to me. The constant atmosphere of dispair and isolation...the unsettling music, and then obviously the stuff in the third act going full on horror. If you liked this you should check out Kuroneko though, it's also a horror inflected Samurai film.

I need time with it quite honestly. Probably another viewing too. For me it was more

Spoiler

the old woman cock blocking her daughter in law

as opposed to

Spoiler

a demon

. I really thought

Spoiler

one of their victims would come back and kill them

What I'd like to have seen is more with the

Spoiler

mask of super glue and rotten face

. Maybe I'm missing something culturally too.

Kuroneko is most certainly on the list. I've heard it referenced a few times and if this is any indication it will probably be damn good.

 

[Stinkles]

Baywatch.

Calibration: I LOVED 21 and 22 Jump Street. I enjoy Pineapple Express. But I just watched Baywatch and let me be clear, it’s just awful. Wretched even. But it’s confusing as hell to watch. Totally it’s completely random. The story is really bad, but the script is brutal. Every single joke is weird or lame or flat. Every piece of dialog sounds like it was written by a 55 year old jobber trying to channel Animal House through a Big Bang Theory lens.

The jokes are excruciating. The verbiage even cringing. Whoever wrote this has never even met a cool or funny person.

This is to 21 Jump Street as Epic Movie is to Mel Brooks History of the World. It completely missed the point of either the original or an R rated parody of it. The weirdest thing about it is that about 70% of the tone and content is basically just a badly written Baywatch episode. With no self awareness, insight or even hindsight. I just can’t even.

When you see something as expensive as this, as badly written and conceived as this, the fact that the lighting and framing and composition of shots is professional, becomes really jarring. Like, I couldn’t look away.

And it’s really freaking long. With a weirdly serious and stupefyingly dull third act. An example of a joke? An awkwardly homophobic setup that’s basically close up of a dong and sack that Efron has to lift up. That’s it. That’s the joke. Erron holds some junk. Haha look at that. That’s gay and disgusting! Right? That sort of thing happens a few times in the movie – and not in a cute charming “let’s deal with how gay some of the original material is in hindsight” – just in a crass, offensive series of gay “jokes” with no setup or payoff. The joke is typically Zac does something gay. HAHAAHAHA!

It made me think of an Iron Chef table of ingredients – this budget, cast, scenario and premise could have been wrangled into a decent 21 Jump St with a good director and script. But I can’t believe someone read THIS dialog and greenlit the thing.


Also the husky Jewish nerd character continually does fat, Jewish or nerdy things and continually exposes himself. He’s there for no conceivable purpose other than to say, “haha a fat Jewish guy on Baywatch right!!!!”

The one joke that has even a whisper of potential is Efron’s realization that life guards have zero business investigating crimes, is ruined by being repeated, basically as stated above, multiple times, verbatim. “Hey why are lifeguards investigating crimes?”


Oh and the music sucks too. Just a terrible mix of TV quality composition and poor contemporary selections. The one musical highlight was a tiny snippet of the original theme during the utterly wasted and mirthless use of Hasselhoff’s cameo. That should have been the easiest thing in the world. But it’s utterly wasted AND jammed into a long product placement.



And the Rock’s final speech is just embarassing.

 

[omgkitty]

I've decided to try and do an October list this year. Because I'm a crazy person, I even added some extra films to watch if something is in a series or has a remake, so I have 35 films instead of 31. We'll see how this actually goes. I've never done this before, and I feel as if my laziness will get the better of me.

Here's the list.

 

[Blader]

I've decided to try and do an October list this year. Because I'm a crazy person, I even added some extra films to watch if something is in a series or has a remake, so I have 35 films instead of 31. We'll see how this actually goes. I've never done this before, and I feel as if my laziness will get the better of me.

Here's the list.

I did a full 31 marathon two years ago and it was honestly pretty exhausting. Especially if I missed a day and had to double up to compensate. It would've been way harder to catch up if I didn't have so many 60ish-minute Universal monster movies that were quick to get through.

Last year I did just 16, which was a lot more manageable. This year I'll be dropping further down to 13, but that's more to accommodate a Europe trip in the back half of the month. Maybe I'll try for 31 again next year...

 

[Sean C]

The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou was kind of disappointing after how much I liked Moonrise Kingdom and especially The Grand Budapest Hotel. There were some good visual elements, especially the parts navigating the ship and the red hats, but I was kind of disappointed with how normal it looked compared to his more recent stuff that I've seen. There were some good scenes but overall I just had a hard time connecting with any of it. Next Anderson will probably be Rushmore or Fantastic Mr. Fox so hopefully I'll like those more, Grand Budapest Hotel was such magic that I need more of it.

The Life Aquatic is Anderson's worst film easily, in my view. Rushmore or The Royal Tenenbaums would be your best bets next.

The Squid and the Whale (2005): Speaking of Wes Anderson, Noah Baumbach apparently wanted him to direct this movie, but Anderson begged off on the basis that it was too personal a story to have anyone other than Baumbach himself tell it. Baumbach has always been a sourer, less stylized Anderson in much of his storytelling (though in the current decade he's been a bit bewitched by the more whimsical presence of Greta Gerwig), and this is a masterpiece of cringe comedy. Jeff Daniels and Jesse Eisenberg's character are both insufferable in a drily hilarious way.

 

[Fancy Clown]

I've decided to try and do an October list this year. Because I'm a crazy person, I even added some extra films to watch if something is in a series or has a remake, so I have 35 films instead of 31. We'll see how this actually goes. I've never done this before, and I feel as if my laziness will get the better of me.

Here's the list.

That's a quality list. Have you seen most of these before?

I dunno if I'm gonna make a preset list this time around. I kinda did last year but I mostly just watched what ever I felt like. Made it to 36 movies last year which was dope, but I was also unemployed at the time lol. So almost definitely not gonna be able to do 31 this year.

 

[Ridley327]

I've decided to try and do an October list this year. Because I'm a crazy person, I even added some extra films to watch if something is in a series or has a remake, so I have 35 films instead of 31. We'll see how this actually goes. I've never done this before, and I feel as if my laziness will get the better of me.

Here's the list.

Classy list from top to bottom, and I see that we're going to share a film.

 

[omgkitty]

That's a quality list. Have you seen most of these before?

I dunno if I'm gonna make a preset list this time around. I kinda did last year but I mostly just watched what ever I felt like. Made it to 36 movies last year which was dope, but I was also unemployed at the time lol. So almost definitely not gonna be able to do 31 this year.

Nope, I haven't seen any of them. I actually own most of these on blu-ray and the rest I'm going to get from Filmstruck.

 

[Infernostew]

I've decided to try and do an October list this year. Because I'm a crazy person, I even added some extra films to watch if something is in a series or has a remake, so I have 35 films instead of 31. We'll see how this actually goes. I've never done this before, and I feel as if my laziness will get the better of me.

Here's the list.

Cool list. I've been doing the 31 days marathon for the past couple years. Although, I don't do a film a day since that's not practical since I have way too much going on socially during the month. Are you following the gaf thread because there's usually 2 "required" films on there as well.

 

[Fancy Clown]

Nope, I haven't seen any of them. I actually own most of these on blu-ray and the rest I'm going to get from Filmstruck.

...you've never seen Jaws?

God damn man, you are in for the GOAT month of movie watching.

 

[Messofanego]

Have had a good week of seeing mother! and The Villainess back to back, they've been invigorating.

Who of you has seen all the clunkers of 2017:
Baywatch, Death Note, Ghost In The Shell, Power Rangers, American Assassin, Transformers, The Mummy, Pirates, King Arthur, and Valerian?

 

[Blader]

I would really recommend not watching them in chronological order. You're bound to get bored and/or feel like the films start blending together.

I also don't think the Testament of Dr. Mabuse is a horror film -- more of a crime/thriller/noir like M -- but it's a good movie anyway.

 

[Fancy Clown]

Smh at skipping Day of the Dead tho : /

 

[omgkitty]

Cool list. I've been doing the 31 days marathon for the past couple years. Although, I don't do a film a day since that's not practical since I have way too much going on socially during the month. Are you following the gaf thread because there's usually 2 "required" films on there as well.

I wasn't really planning on it. I like looking in on that thread, but never really feel my opinions on films are constructive or insightful (it's why I don't post in here a lot either, and just lurk).

...you've never seen Jaws?

God damn man, you are in for the GOAT month of movie watching.

Nope. I kinda have a thing about sharks and the ocean that freaks me out, so I've never sought it out, though I do own it now (also not a fan of Spielberg either).

I would really recommend not watching them in chronological order. You're bound to get bored and/or feel like the films start blending together.

I also don't think the Testament of Dr. Mabuse is a horror film -- more of a crime/thriller/noir like M -- but it's a good movie anyway.

I was following the horror tag on Letterboxd where it's listed. I also haven't seen the original Dr. Mabuse yet, though I do have it, but it's like 4 hours long :|

Smh at skipping Day of the Dead tho : /

Honestly, if I have to cut some, it might be these as they are two I don't have readily available at the moment.

 

[Fancy Clown]

Nope. I kinda have a thing about sharks and the ocean that freaks me out, so I've never sought it out, though I do own it now (also not a fan of Spielberg either).

Jaws may fuck you up then. Also a friend of mine pointed out that Jaws kinda feels like an Altman movie, and based on my (admittedly little) exposure to Altman I can see where he's coming from, so you may still find a lot to like.

 

[lordxar]

I've decided to try and do an October list this year. Because I'm a crazy person, I even added some extra films to watch if something is in a series or has a remake, so I have 35 films instead of 31. We'll see how this actually goes. I've never done this before, and I feel as if my laziness will get the better of me.

Here's the list.

Do it! The marathon is a bitch at times and you'll need a movie break or a complete change of genre when done but this is my third year and I've loved doing it each time! It's work but fun at the same time.

 

[Blader]

Smh at skipping Day of the Dead tho : /

This is actually on my list this year! I had only seen the first two and Romero's death was, unfortunately, a good excuse to round out the trilogy and check out a couple of his other non-zombie films (Martin and Creepshow).

Honestly, if I have to cut some, it might be these as they are two I don't have readily available at the moment.

NOTLD is in the public domain, so it should be available to stream virtually anywhere.

 

[kevin1025]

Have had a good week of seeing mother! and The Villainess back to back, they've been invigorating.

Who of you has seen all the clunkers of 2017:
Baywatch, Death Note, Ghost In The Shell, Power Rangers, American Assassin, Transformers, The Mummy, Pirates, King Arthur, and Valerian?

I've seen all of those apart from American Assassin and Pirates (which I'm watching today). Of them all, I think Valerian has its qualities, and King Arthur has one of the best action scenes of the year but the rest is blah.

 

[Fancy Clown]

This is actually on my list this year! I had only seen the first two and Romero's death was, unfortunately, a good excuse to round out the trilogy and check out a couple of his other non-zombie films (Martin and Creepshow).

Yeah I'd like to check out Martin and Creepshow this year as well if I can find them streaming somewhere.

 

[Divius]

Just wanted to say thanks to all the people who replied to my list of horror franchises earlier. Added and moved around some stuff. I feel like there's enough material on it now, and I'll decide on what to watch on the fly depending on what mood I am in.

On one hand I am really excited for this year, on the other I am dreading watching like 7 Friday the 13th movies. And then 9 Halloween movies. Guess we'll see how it goes.

 

[kevin1025]

Just wanted to say thanks to all the people who replied to my list of horror franchises earlier. Added and moved around some stuff. I feel like there's enough material on it now, and I'll decide on what to watch on the fly depending on what mood I am in.

On one hand I am really excited for this year, on the other I am dreading watching like 7 Friday the 13th movies. And then 9 Halloween movies. Guess we'll see how it goes.

I'll be joining you on that journey, I've only ever seen the first movies in both of those. Plus I'm adding the Nightmare series on there, as well.

 

[Fancy Clown]

I thought about doing franchises because on the one hand it would be cool to see how they all evolved over time, but on the other hand yeah that's a lot of shitty movies in a row

 

[Ridley327]

As someone who has done some small franchise runs before, I applaud anyone that doesn't give up on some of them partway through. Friday the 13th, in particular, is soooooooooooooooooooooooo much crap that needs to be sifted through to get to parts 4 and 6.

 

[SeanC]

As someone who has done some small franchise runs before, I applaud anyone that doesn't give up on some of them partway through. Friday the 13th, in particular, is soooooooooooooooooooooooo much crap that needs to be sifted through to get to parts 4 and 6.

Yeah but...chocolate bars?

 

[TheOnlyOneHeEverFeared]

So, mother! certainly has been a polarising opinion going by social medial. Some people hate it, some people think its amazing, some people just don't get it. As for me, I was a little of all three of those things, but generally I kind of hate it, although I do 'get it'.

When I say I get it, I mean I get the allegory, its a bible retelling thing, great. The director created this scenario to fit the characters who are metaphors for bible stuff really really well, and he's so pleased with himself his smugness reeks off the entire film.

The metaphors are painfully, painfully obvious. Like getting punched in the face obvious, once you get its a bible story at least. So obvious I don't know how director Darren Aronofsky could be so pleased with himself about it. Ditto for the symbolism too, although of course it all ties in with the metaphors. If you don't tell your metaphors or bible story well, it doesn't matter how great you think you are or how clever your idea is, its just rubbish.

Also, he acknowledges feminism! In yet another face punchingly obvious way. Now I'm not a woman, so I can't and wouldn't like to speak for the experiences of women here, but is this the sort of the film for a man to make? Especially a smug self satisfied man like Aronofsky? I don't feel like it is, but maybe women or people more appropriate can tell me something different.

Like yes, we get it, we get the point. The point is a bible story, its about women enjoy sacrificing for men who don't care or appreciate it and just take and take till there's nothing to give, those are smart intelligent themes in theory. They're just told so badly, with such an awful pretentious manner, that it made the film basically unbearable for me. Now again, maybe thats the point, films don't have to be 'enjoyable' and making you feel bad is an end goal, except I don't think how I feel is what the film was going for, I think it failed, dramatically. And fuck the final act, seriously, it takes acting cruelly to our main character to explain the metaphor to a place it didn't need to go, at all, it was fucking gross.

The acting really isn't great, from any of the cast, but thats ok because of what it all means and symbolism and stuff, right? The sound design is stifling, not purposefully I don't think, and the visuals not unlike the rest of the film were as subtle as a sledgehammer.

mother! is the worst film of 2017 so far for me.

 

[Blader]

As someone who has done some small franchise runs before, I applaud anyone that doesn't give up on some of them partway through. Friday the 13th, in particular, is soooooooooooooooooooooooo much crap that needs to be sifted through to get to parts 4 and 6.

I kinda like part 2, though the original was basically trash. I'm gonna skip ahead to parts 4 and 6 for this year's marathon, since this October is going to have an actual Friday the 13th.

 

[Count Dookkake]

As someone who has done some small franchise runs before, I applaud anyone that doesn't give up on some of them partway through. Friday the 13th, in particular, is soooooooooooooooooooooooo much crap that needs to be sifted through to get to parts 4 and 6.

The twist in 5 is pretty amazing. Despite a few fun moments, I just wish that twist was in a better movie.

 

[More_Badass]

So, mother! certainly has been a polarising opinion going by social medial. Some people hate it, some people think its amazing, some people just don't get it. As for me, I was a little of all three of those things, but generally I kind of hate it, although I do 'get it'.

mother! is the worst film of 2017 so far for me.

I think the thing is that because the Bible is itself fables and parables already, abstracting it more just allows for broader interpretations. I don't think it's merely just "women sacrifice for men", or Bible retelling

Some other interpretations from the other thread

A film can have several meanings at the same time, you know. It's perfectly valid to see the film as the relationship of artist, muse/lover and what success does to that relation. In fact, I'm pretty sure it's one of the ways Aronofsky intended the film to be read.

I'm sure it will be construed that way, but there are many valid readings of the film. The film is also what people take away from what they consume and use it for their own devices. Just as someone who has a bone to pick with religion could read it as a stab at the construction and structure of religion to fit their worldview and push the film onto others that way.

Just got back from seeing it. I like your thoughts, but

I felt an uncanny familiarity to her claustrophobia and lack of control. As a female who was in a relationship with an abusive narcissist, the feeling of other people in your life without knowing who they are, these people taking precedence.. the whole time that all familiar fight or flight mechanism was going off in my head. I felt like the ending was a representation of a typical user-type personality who takes everything from someone in love without giving it back. And then sucking the life out of them while moving onto the next victim. I may be projecting, but that's how the movie made me feel

 

[TheOnlyOneHeEverFeared]

I think the thing is that because the Bible is itself fables and parables already, abstracting it more just allows for broader interpretations. I don't think it's merely just "women sacrifice for men", or Bible retelling

Some other interpretations from the other thread

That's fair, I've seen lots of people think it was amazing. It just really rubbed me up the wrong way, so to speak.

 

[lordxar]

For the big 80's franchises, ANoES is my least favorite. The Friday's at least were fun if only dumb fun. I watched them all in a row years back. Part X in space was probably my favorite because of how out there it got. Halloween was decent I thought. ANoES gets too cheesy and Friday gets too campy but Halloween is a bit, just a bit more grounded in it's latter offerings. Hellraiser 1 through 4 are as far as I go there.

 

[Icolin]

Have had a good week of seeing mother! and The Villainess back to back, they've been invigorating.

Who of you has seen all the clunkers of 2017:
Baywatch, Death Note, Ghost In The Shell, Power Rangers, American Assassin, Transformers, The Mummy, Pirates, King Arthur, and Valerian?

I've seen all of the clunkers, and enjoyed half of them.

 

[kevin1025]

Where do the Phantasm movies fall into the horror franchises? I've never seen any of them.

 

[big ander]

f13 is the easiest of those franchises to get through because they're the most disposable. from 1-4 they get better and better, then 5 is garbage and 6 is good. the rest are awful but at least they're 80 minutes and dumb as shit.
anoes is probably the best overall as a franchise, since the original is amazing, 2 is a fascinating oddball, 3 is great, apparently they're widely hated but I remember liking 4 and 5 well enough since they work serially off of 3 in a good way and they have cool kills. scratch freddy's dead and go straight to new nightmare.
maybe it's the fact that halloween is a masterpiece but that series really drops off, other than 3. 2 and 4 are alright but everything after is a real downer.

 

[SeanC]

Where do the Phantasm movies fall into the horror franchises? I've never seen any of them.

They never really caught on and they are a little more of a mind fuck and dealing with dreams and weird atmosphere than anything. I only have seen the first three, though. There's a sort of mythology to it all but it's often just odd for sake of odd.

The drilly-ball-thingys were barely in the first movie, but the sequels made them big deals and I never really liked that. I haven't seen the last two movies, like I said, so maybe they reeled back on that a bit.

 

[lordxar]

Where do the Phantasm movies fall into the horror franchises? I've never seen any of them.

Their b movies in all the b glory you can find. Cheesy as fuck too and the later ones actually use cut footage from the first which strangely worked. The budgets are low and it shows. Shudder has a few/most but like part 2 has to be watched elsewhere, or that's how it was when I blew through them a few months ago. This series is nearly Rocky Horror levels of bad...but fun.

 

[kevin1025]

They never really caught on and they are a little more of a mind fuck and dealing with dreams and weird atmosphere than anything. I only have seen the first three, though. There's a sort of mythology to it all but it's often just odd for sake of odd.

The drilly-ball-thingys were barely in the first movie, but the sequels made them big deals and I never really liked that. I haven't seen the last two movies, like I said, so maybe they reeled back on that a bit.

Their b movies in all the b glory you can find. Cheesy as fuck too and the later ones actually use cut footage from the first which strangely worked. The budgets are low and it shows. Shudder has a few/most but like part 2 has to be watched elsewhere, or that's how it was when I blew through them a few months ago. This series is nearly Rocky Horror levels of bad...but fun.

I'll add it to the list, then, thanks! I have the 5-movie collection on DVD and never got around to them, but I may opt for Shudder instead except for #2.

I'm definitely starting the Halloween festivities during the last week of September, there's way too many on my list now, haha.

 

[Messofanego]

I've seen all of those apart from American Assassin and Pirates (which I'm watching today). Of them all, I think Valerian has its qualities, and King Arthur has one of the best action scenes of the year but the rest is blah.

Can't beat Atomic Blonde's long shot action sequence tho 😉

 

[kevin1025]

Can't beat Atomic Blonde's long shot action sequence tho 😉

I still need to see it! Although it looked awesome from the trailers.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

Hey, it's Effy from Skins (and lesser so The Maze Runner movies)!

It started incredibly promising with that bank robbery, and then devolved into too many night scenes, coincidences, and dull exposition. I don't know why there are so many night action scenes lately... less CG to do? Cheaper to pull off? I did enjoy pieces of the movie, though, and Javier Bardem's slow motion hair was neat. But he mostly just tapped his cane and threatened people's throats for the runtime. Johnny Depp didn't really look like he cared much. And they got as good an ending as they could have, all things considered. I hope they leave it at that, despite the post credits. It gets a 4/10 from me, because those dull parts are REAL dull.

 

[AngmarsKing701]

Valhalla Rising (2009) - this was my first Refn movie. No, I've not seen Drive nor Bronson nor Neon Demon. Now, first I'm gonna say I liked it. Let's get that out of the way. I liked the cinematography, the pacing (even with the exorbitant number of scenes without movement and those in slo mo). I watched this and wondered whether others interpreted it the way I had. So I look online. "Man held as slave kills his master to escape, falls in with Christians, winds up in strange land and faces tougher challenges."

Well, yes, I guess that's what happens, but it's not what the movie is about!

Mads is Odin af. One Eye, and they call him One Eye ffs. We've got Christian vs Norse themes dripping through every scene of this thing, and it boils down to father/son relationships and sacrifice.

Anyway, I liked it. I liked that it had deeper meaning than what the plot summaries suggest.

3.5 / 5

 

[Fancy Clown]

Hour of the Wolf: A horror film is probably the most apt generic representation of the struggling creative and personal conflicts of an artist's id run amok. Soul snatching, isolation, obsession, and the dredging up of personal demons are common to both horror and artistry after all. And as a both a tremendous artist, and supremely conflicted individual Bergman brings this dark night of the soul to life in the most unsettling of ways. Bergman delves much further into the overtly gothic and grotesque than I had expected, but by rooting it all in the troubled waters of Von Sydow's character's subconscious lends it a chilling verisimilitude that transcends convention.

I probably should have saved this for October given how god damn creepy this was, but at least it's got me in the mood.

 

[Net_Wrecker]

Smh at skipping Day of the Dead tho : /

People always skip Day of The Dead. People suck


Also, I think I've recovered from Twin Peaks Season 3 enough to get back into cinematic theatrical cinema movies. I gave David Lynch my summer, but now I need to see other things again.

Prepare for my return, Movie GAF. It will be gloriously uneventful..