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[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Growing up I had a birth mark on my face. My parents never allowed me to get it removed because it was too close to my eye and the doctor said that the operation could make my eye droopy. In reality the mark was maybe 5mm across and not that big of a deal but I became severely self conscious about it. I started avoiding people in real life, not looking them in the eye... or even straight on in an attempt to hide it from people.

But then I turned 18 and I went to the doctor and got it removed. The surgery was great! It my eyes are fine and scarring is minimal. Hell you can't even see it on a good day. And for about a few weeks there I felt wonderful and happy and I even lost my virginity with my new found confidence that allowed me to speak to women.

But then I found a new flaw with myself. Something that I can't hide by turning my head. It's just... my face. I'm severely unhappy with the way I look. I spent 3 weeks in bed last month - not even exaggerating, the only time I got up was to have dinner, shower and go to the toilet - just because I felt bad.

I haven't spoken to anyone in real life in months because I hate the way I look. I hate the way I am.

I've thought about suicide a lot. I don't know. People say that you should go to the doctor about this kind of stuff... but what are you supposed to say? "Oh hey, I'm depressed. Can you give me pills?".

You go to to the doctor or the therapist and you tell them the truth about how you feel, man.

Something I've noticed is that often times is that even after great change, people still aren't happy and they don't know why. Whether it's a cosmetic surgery or a rapid weight loss or something, they still are not happy. It's not always the external but the internal.

See a therapist, bud. You won't regret it. I don't think it was ever the birthmark or lack of it or your face that is making you feel this way. You're projecting your internal feelings into your appearance. Armchair psychiatry though, you'll do better with a therapist.

 

[Valhelm]

I don't have the words.

I call bullshit.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

I'm sure you've had your fill of weirdass shit from the other GAF confessions so here's a relatively tame one. It's EXTREMELY mild but fuq dat. I just want to vent.

My best friend is "cheating" on his long-term girlfriend. By "cheating", I mean I've found out he's flirting with a ton of girls on OKCupid, sending out messages to pretty much everybody he can and getting into conversations, some not exactly G-rated. I've no real reason to believe he's actually DOING anything, like meeting the girls IRL, but he's at the very least flirting with them.

This wouldn't bother me so much if he wasn't so outward in talking about how he's so in love with his girlfriend and how she's going to move in at the end of this year (she lives a couple hours away atm) and how he texts her all the time with baby talk. We've also had unrelated conversations months before where he expressed his disgust in people who cheat and he's a giant supporter of monogamy. He's confronted his girlfriend several times about how sometimes he thinks she doesn't love him, or general paranoia about not getting pregnant before marriage (making sure she doesn't get pregnant as a way to force him into marriage, etc.). Not that he doesn't want to get married, he plans to propose by the end of next year, but he's just also been outward about monogamy and that he would never ever ever trust anyone who cheats on him.

I'm not going to say anything to him. That's really his problem, IMO. And who knows? Maybe when she moves in and they get engaged he'll stop that shit. He does mention he's lonely sometimes, since they both go on for months without being able to see each other (both in different colleges). Maybe he's doing that out of boredom more than anything. Or maybe he won't cut it out even after she moves in. But again, I don't want to get involved. I just find it pretty frustrating. He's running around flirting with other girls when he's in a committed, loving relationship with a girlfriend who very clearly worships the ground he walks on (I've met her, she pretty much does). I guess some people can have it all and still fuck it up for no goddamn reason.

Anyways, just needed to vent. You don't even have to post it, as I doubt anyone on GAF would find it fascinating enough to read through all of this

Sounds like he's just having fun. Sometimes a dude is flirting just to flirt. Sometimes people like to have some attention in them, feel special.

If he does cross that line, it's another story though.

 

[Yado]

I call bullshit.

It's really not that far-fetched for two horny young men with an interest in other men to fool around.

To the confessor above, I think you should call out your best friend on what he's doing. What's the point of having a best friend if you don't speak up when you think he's doing something he shouldn't?

 

[Mordeccai]

But then I found a new flaw with myself. Something that I can't hide by turning my head. It's just... my face. I'm severely unhappy with the way I look. I spent 3 weeks in bed last month - not even exaggerating, the only time I got up was to have dinner, shower and go to the toilet - just because I felt bad.

I haven't spoken to anyone in real life in months because I hate the way I look. I hate the way I am.

I've thought about suicide a lot. I don't know. People say that you should go to the doctor about this kind of stuff... but what are you supposed to say? "Oh hey, I'm depressed. Can you give me pills?".

I just wanted to chime in and say I've been in a similar spot, with staying in bed for weeks on end for no 'good' reason. (Depression doesn't follow reason usually.) That is basically the biggest marker for depression and any doctor you tell that to will 100% either refer you to a psychiatrist or start you on a general anti-depressant that day.

I'm the kind of guy who loves alone time, I need it, but complete isolation takes its toll and the only reason I didn't go insane was due to incredible roommates. You really can't go wrong by giving a doctor a visit. And honestly, you just tell the doc that you think you are depressed, you've stayed in bed, and it will go from there. It really is that easy. I've been on a general anti-depressant called citalopram for a few months now and it's helped my mood out a fair amount. So really, if you're reading this, go give it a shot because it can only help.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

I have two confessions, both related to my buddies girlfriends. In collecting my thoughts, I realize this may sound like I'm bitter fuckwit about them having girl friends, but I'm really not: I just find both of their girlfriends to be annoying cunts.

Friend number one has a rich, pretentious girlfriend who is a 'model'. This chick goes on and on about TJ Maxx, being a fashionista, and is excessively proud of her skeletal frame. Always shouting too, loud as fuck and generally annoying. Anyway one day I found a butt plug on my friends floor (we lived in an apartment) and I was reasonably certain he didn't like it in the ass, so it had to be hers. I went into the kitchen and put some cayenne pepper, hot as the fires of hell Thai chili powder,lemon juice and tabasco sauce in some water. Stirred it all up and let it sit for a bit. I knew she was coming over after she got off work, so 30 minutes before she usually arrives I soaked her butt plug in this mixture. Placed it back where I found it before she came inside, then sat out in our living room and played 3DS biding my time. Sure enough, a couple hours later I hear what I can only describe as screams of the damned reverberating out of his room. This was quickly followed by the sound of her slapping the shit out of my friend thinking he did it to her. She runs the shower, my buddy comes out of his room and his face is fucking RED from being slapped. I just glance over and say "Whoa dude, what the fuck do you guys do in there?" He gave me a cold dead stare, shook his head, went out to the balcony and smoked a cigarette. He knew I wasn't a fan of his girlfriend but I don't believe he ever suspected I set that shit up.

Friend number two has been with this girl for a few years, they have a house together, plan to get engaged. Now at first I really liked this girl, thought she was sane and a good match. She has the most massive, shapely breasts as well. Sometimes when I'm over there I'll just stare at her tits and get lost. Anyhow she has turned out to be the neediest person I have ever met. He has to tuck her into bed every night, she will scream across the house for him to come help her hold a towel or some stupid shit, she gets jealous when he laughs at my jokes (bitch, we've been friends for 12 years, who the fuck are you?!), she refuses to clean up the house, it really just rubs me the wrong way. So, while I was in their bathroom one day, I decided to rub myself the right way. She had bras all over the place and I was feeling particularly horny that day anyway. I booted up some porn on my tablet, and instead of yanking my shaft with my hands I stroked it exclusively with her bras. The smooth padding felt so nice. Three of her bras I desecrated with my cock skin, and eventually busted inside one of the cups and spread it out into a thin layer. This was at 1am, they go to bed around 10 (I frequently go over there to just hang out and crash for the night), so I knew the cum would dry by morning. Next morning I wake up and say good morning and notice she is wearing the bra that I splooged in. Felt kind of empowering to know my cum was on her tits, though I did feel a little bit guilty for my buddy. I just hope he didn't get mouthy with her breasts that day because I really don't like the idea of my semen being inside of him.

You sound like a terrible person. I mean, I understand you don't like your friends' girlfriends, but... the fuck? Do you get some perverse sexual thrill out of "punishing" these women by fucking with them like this?

That's messed up, man. Really. I mean, it's one thing if you're annoyed by them, but this jumps from pranks to assault.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

So I'm deeply in love with my best friend. Up until lately I've managed to keep my feelings concealed for his own good and happiness since he's not single and of fear of scaring him away and losing him. All was good until we had sex one night this past summer. It literally came out of nowhere but god did it feel good. All these pent-up feelings, the excitement, I felt like my heart was gonna explode that night. It was magical.

Of course the next day, awkwardness was in the air. I tried to talk about it but he clearly wasn't ready to have that conversation. I let it be. Days passed by and things almost seemed like were back to normal. Until it happened again and again and then some.

At this point I'm sure he enjoys it as much as I do (no point to think otherwise after so many times it has happened) but on the flipside he doesn't talk about it even when we're together. He knows me well enough therefore he's confident that I'm not gonna talk to his bf about it no matter what happens. And he's right, I'm not gonna do it, there's no point, I don't have anything to earn from that.

Realistically, there's no easy way out of my situation. I could just let it be for the time being and be the only one who's emotionally wearing down. But for how long?

Stay the fuck away from him. He's using you for sex by the sounds of it, cheating on his SO with you. You're the other man/woman in this scenario. Don't waste your time, he's not gonna return your feelings. For your sake, stop. Find a new best friend.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

So this isn't particularly juicy but, after spending quite a bit of my life being obsessed with the topic and suspecting more and more only to deny it and repress myself, I accepted myself as transgender a couple months ago. I'm 22 and flailing aimlessly in community college, hate my job, slowly lost every single friend and have never been in a relationship due to crippling social anxiety, have been numb to every emotion except sadness and anger for as long as I can remember, never formed any kind of close bond to a parent or anybody else, but holy shit I finally feel like I know who I am!

For the first time in my life I feel motivated to do something, I feel great about the small steps I've taken to look and feel more feminine, I just started talking to a therapist about it so I'm probably a while away from starting hormones or coming out to anyone else but fuck! I actually feel like a person who has the potential to grow and learn and love and be loved! I have no idea if my family will reject me or if my mom and stepdad will kick me out of the house (and I make nowhere near enough to live on my own or with roommates), and according to the wiki article 'LGBT employment discrimination in the United States' my state has no employment laws protecting me and I'm sure I'll become very worried about this stuff soon but fuck it!

I don't feel like a slug just going through the motions anymore! It'll be a long hard journey but I see a (somewhat hairy at the moment) woman in the mirror who is excited for her future!

I'm ending tonight on a happy note. Good on you, girl. I hope everything goes alright for you. From here on, every step you take is a small victory. Best of luck.

 

[dani_dc]

You sound like a terrible person. I mean, I understand you don't like your friends' girlfriends, but... the fuck? Do you get some perverse sexual thrill out of "punishing" these women by fucking with them like this?

That's messed up, man. Really. I mean, it's one thing if you're annoyed by them, but this jumps from pranks to assault.

God, what is it with this thread and sexual assault?
You felt empowered cumming in your friend girlfriend bra for absolutely no reason? I can't even begin to make sense out of that.

Stay the fuck away from him. He's using you for sex by the sounds of it, cheating on his SO with you. You're the other man/woman in this scenario. Don't waste your time, he's not gonna return your feelings. For your sake, stop. Find a new best friend.

Yup, he sounds like an horrible guy. He's only interested in you at a sexual level, no relationship nwith him will go anywhere. Simple way to stop is to be frontal with him and saying no.

I'm ending tonight on a happy note. Good on you, girl. I hope everything goes alright for you. From here on, every step you take is a small victory. Best of luck.

Between this and the cross dressing confession, its really great seeing people being themselves.
I'll be hoping for the best for you.

 

[Altazor]

Stay the fuck away from him. He's using you for sex by the sounds of it, cheating on his SO with you. You're the other man/woman in this scenario. Don't waste your time, he's not gonna return your feelings. For your sake, stop. Find a new best friend.

yup, sounds like you're being used. He's taking advantage of your friendship to cheat on his boyfriend and counting on you not to rat him. It's pretty much an unspoken, emotional blackmail.

It's gonna hurt, anonymous gaffer, but you must bail out. It's for the best. Nothing good can come out of that situation.

 

[Nealand Liquor]

You sound like a terrible person. I mean, I understand you don't like your friends' girlfriends, but... the fuck? Do you get some perverse sexual thrill out of "punishing" these women by fucking with them like this?

That's messed up, man. Really. I mean, it's one thing if you're annoyed by them, but this jumps from pranks to assault.

Holy fuck that dude is messed up. I have a feeling he's the creepy, lonely, bitter guy in the group who never has a girlfriend. I see him as always guilting his "bros" about how thier bitch girlfriends mess up their "bro-time".

I bet the women are nice people and it's the confessor that acts an annoying bitter child.

Fucking hell too. Cuming in the woman's bra and assulting the other with her sex toy? Absolute sick fuck.

 

[WiiRevolution1]

To the people trying to send me inside information and rumours: I am not Kotaku.

So...your not gonna post my Smash 4 DLC leak? Come on! I'm just trying to pass on real info!

Fine...I'll do it:

I am a leaker of smash 4 and know the DLC characters. Please understand these characters:

1: Ridley
2: Inklings
3: Captain Toad (Toadette alt)
4: Wolf
5: Lucas
6: Toon Zelda
7: Snake
8: Simon Belmont
9: Metal Face
10: Paper Mario
11: Pheonix Wright
12: Sylveon
13: Emolga
14: Kyoko Kirigiri
15: Stella from Xenophobia
16: The Witch from The Witch's House

I hope you like playing as these characters.

Its totally not a joke. Nope./s

Spoiler

For the last 3: I dream of a game and book crossover Smash clone.

Edit: I'll only send in real confessions. I do love reading the other confessions greatly.

Edit2: Holy hell at that six year revenge guy.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

So...your not gonna post my Smash 4 DLC leak? Come on! I'm just trying to pass on real info!

Fine...I'll do it:



Its totally not a joke. Nope./s

Spoiler

For the last 3: I dream of a game and book crossover Smash clone.

Edit: I'll only send in real confessions. I do love reading the other confessions greatly.

Ha! It was all part of my plan to flush you out of hiding! Nintendo is now on to you!

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Holy fuck that dude is messed up. I have a feeling he's the creepy, lonely, bitter guy in the group who never has a girlfriend. I see him as always guilting his "bros" about how thier bitch girlfriends mess up their "bro-time".

I bet the women are nice people and it's the confessor that acts an annoying bitter child.

Fucking hell too. Cuming in the woman's bra and assulting the other with her sex toy? Absolute sick fuck.

Definitely. You don't come off looking good in this story, man. I agree with this estimation. You're a creep.

 

[TheOGB]

I went into the kitchen and put some cayenne pepper, hot as the fires of hell Thai chili powder,lemon juice and tabasco sauce in some water. Stirred it all up and let it sit for a bit. I knew she was coming over after she got off work, so 30 minutes before she usually arrives I soaked her butt plug in this mixture. Placed it back where I found it before she came inside, then sat out in our living room and played 3DS biding my time. Sure enough, a couple hours later I hear what I can only describe as screams of the damned reverberating out of his room. This was quickly followed by the sound of her slapping the shit out of my friend thinking he did it to her. She runs the shower, my buddy comes out of his room and his face is fucking RED from being slapped. I just glance over and say "Whoa dude, what the fuck do you guys do in there?"

So, while I was in their bathroom one day, I decided to rub myself the right way. She had bras all over the place and I was feeling particularly horny that day anyway. I booted up some porn on my tablet, and instead of yanking my shaft with my hands I stroked it exclusively with her bras. The smooth padding felt so nice. Three of her bras I desecrated with my cock skin, and eventually busted inside one of the cups and spread it out into a thin layer. This was at 1am, they go to bed around 10 (I frequently go over there to just hang out and crash for the night), so I knew the cum would dry by morning. Next morning I wake up and say good morning and notice she is wearing the bra that I splooged in. Felt kind of empowering to know my cum was on her tits, though I did feel a little bit guilty for my buddy. I just hope he didn't get mouthy with her breasts that day because I really don't like the idea of my semen being inside of him.

Man rereading that... jeez what the fuck man.

 

[Professor Beef]

I'm not gonna lie; I laughed at that buttplug one. :lol

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

I'm not gonna lie; I laughed at that buttplug one. :lol

 

[dani_dc]

The butplugg confession might just give birth to a new porn subtype.

A new more extreme version of the Cinnamon challenge.

 

[A Fish Aficionado]

The butplugg confession might just give birth to a new porn subtype.

A new more extreme version of the Cinnamon challenge.

I'd watch that.

 

[Deaf Spacker]

I'm not gonna lie; I laughed at that buttplug one. :lol

So did I, the wanking into a bra one I just shook my head after reading it.

 

[Rapstah]

The buttplug one was funny enough to be fake, but then the bra one was disturbing enough to be real. I don't know what to believe anymore.

 

[Go_Ly_Dow]

Sick fucks

 

[dragonlife]

I mean, who wouldn't blow this guy.

Holy shit, he's adorable.

 

[Replicant]

Good job on taking over, NTGYK!

I mean, who wouldn't blow this guy.

Oh, he's one half of the bi-curious serial killer guys in S1 of "The Folowing". The other half is that guy who plays SunSpot in "X-Men: Days of Future Past" (Adan Canto is his name, I think).

Man, their scenes were hot and steamy in that show.

And that's my confession. I watched that dreadful show just to see these two bi-curious serial killer guys made out and had angsty/fucked up relationship with each other.

 

[davepoobond]

You sound like a terrible person. I mean, I understand you don't like your friends' girlfriends, but... the fuck? Do you get some perverse sexual thrill out of "punishing" these women by fucking with them like this?

That's messed up, man. Really. I mean, it's one thing if you're annoyed by them, but this jumps from pranks to assault.

he doesnt sound like a "terrible" person -- just a disturbed one. he needs some therapy.

 

[CoolOff]

Good on you, man. Very heartwarming. You have a great wife.

If I marry a woman even half as accepting I'd count myself lucky, make sure you hang on to that one.

Spoiler

Not a cross-dresser, I just mean accepting in general...

 

[soepje]

You sound like a terrible person. I mean, I understand you don't like your friends' girlfriends, but... the fuck? Do you get some perverse sexual thrill out of "punishing" these women by fucking with them like this?

That's messed up, man. Really. I mean, it's one thing if you're annoyed by them, but this jumps from pranks to assault.

Damn, that dude has issues.

I realize this may sound like I'm bitter fuckwit about them having girl friends, but I'm really not: I just find both of their girlfriends to be annoying cunts.

Eh, i'm not sure if you just sound like one man.

 

[vikki]

The buttplug one was funny enough to be fake, but then the bra one was disturbing enough to be real. I don't know what to believe anymore.

Welcome to Gaf's Creative Writing Challenge #201

 

[-PXG-]

The spicy butt plug/ bra nut buster guy sounds like a grade A asshole. He's just as bad if not worse than the people he doesn't like. Grow the fuck up dude.

Spoiler

I laughed my ass off though. It was funny I know I shouldn't have though.

 

[Cromat]

Holy shit at the butt plug person...

 

[Mordeccai]

The butplugg confession might just give birth to a new porn subtype.

A new more extreme version of the Cinnamon challenge.

Oh great now I have a mental image of a porn star shooting cinnamon out of her ass.

I don't understand how butt plug dude can call himself a friend to those guys. Friends don't fuck with other peoples girls like that man, that's a serious breach of trust and straight up sexual assault. No way in hell I'd still be friends with a guy like that if I found out about that.

 

[BodiesWithoutOrgans]

23 pages and we got a incest confession

Holy crap its still on-going

I would be against it if it was male & female

I dont see the harm no harm in HARM in Male/Male as long as they were both over the age of 18 and consenting

but thats just my Opinion

Best confess so far is the dad doing his son gf then the incest one

 

[Go_Ly_Dow]

a storm of sickness is coming tonight.....

hold me GAF

Spoiler

actually don't you sick fucks

 

[dani_dc]

I'd watch that.

Oh great now I have a mental image of a porn star shooting cinnamon out of her ass.

Great, now we just need a camera and some volunteers from either gender to get the ball rolling!

 

[John Kowalski]

a storm of sickness is coming tonight.....

hold me GAF

Spoiler

actually don't you sick fucks

come love, i will hold you tight and we'll drink hot cocoa until the storm passes

 

[Rainy]

This thread is amazing.

 

[Go_Ly_Dow]

come love, i will hold you tight and we'll drink hot cocoa until the storm passes

so you can ease your way in to my home and then fap on my under garments whilst in my bathroom?

 

[John Kowalski]

so you can ease your way in to my home and then fap on my under garments whilst in my bathroom?

cmon love i wouldn't leave so much evidence behind, you can trust me

 

[Go_Ly_Dow]

cmon love i wouldn't leave so much evidence behind, you can trust me

oh you....

why can't they all be like you?

 

[Mistel]

Hasn't John like just left some evidence?

 

[dani_dc]

cmon love i wouldn't leave so much evidence behind, you can trust me

I smell a new confession coming.

Spoiler

Is that Emanon?

 

[MaximumSpider]

More confessions!

 

[John Kowalski]

I smell a new confession coming.

Spoiler

Is that Emanon?

Spoiler

It's mom Emanon, which is kinda still Emanon i guess? But yes, it is.

 

[Rich!]

Anonymous confession from me: I have the hots for someone on gaf

Oh wait that wasnt anonymous was it? No harm done. Not like I've said who it is! Or ever will do.

Only clue is the country, same as me.

 

[NoctisVsStar]

Anonymous confession from me: I have the hots for someone on gaf

Oh wait that wasnt anonymous was it? No harm done. Not like I've said who it is! Or ever will do.

Only clue is the country, same as me.

Trampolineeeee!! We need a state.

 

[Rich!]

Trampolineeeee!! We need a state.

The 51st state

Spoiler

england

 

[dani_dc]

The 51st state

Spoiler

england

Here I as thinking Puerto Rico.

Lots of hots between English GAF.

Spoiler

It's mom Emanon, which is kinda still Emanon i guess? But yes, it is.

Spoiler

Nice, had a feeling that was the case, nice arc and nice taste there

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Hectic day today. I got a few more coming later when I'm free but here's one we received this morning.

Life's pretty meh. Lived with a distant and rude dad, and my kinda off mom since I was born. My dads not the real one. I haven't left home in months, and am homeschooled, and can't go to public school because mixing sexes is against my religion even though I really don't want to be here. I'm angry, and sad, and depressed, but anytime I bring this to my mother she just talks about her screwed up life and how we're all depressed, and goes on a tangent about allah and finding my faith to be strong blaaaah. I just wanna go to school 8 hours a day, and communicate with other human beings in the flesh. Maybe get a part time job and splurge. I've never had a relationship with my dad because he's a jerk. He's started becoming nicer lately after he was caught cheating on my mom, but I don't really wanna reciprocate. I'm 15. My childhood is behind me, and I don't wanna let him into my "life" now. My days consist of videogames, gaining weight (I'm not fat, just a bit chubby) and my online highschool that I can't muster the effort to progress through reasonably. I could leave if I wanted to, if I just punched my dad in the face and told mom to fuck off, but they've supported me financially my whole life, and besides her lack of sympathy for my public school plight my mom's an ok person. I don't wanna miss out on highschool, and college, and I just don't wanna be here. i wanna go

That really sucks, dude. Shit situation all around. Is it possible to live with a more understanding relative?

You're only 15. Once you're done with this shit, are you able to go to a good college?

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

For a while I've struggled with if I'm Straight, Bi or Gay. It doesn't keep me up at night or anything I just think about it from time to time. I have LOT of experience with men by far, yet I do not find myself attracted to men or the male form at all. I just like the dick. Whereas I love women and the female form, life and hometown baby, but I'm pretty luckless with ladies and have only been with a couple. I suppose it all started when I was a teen. So here I will confess the story of how my confusion began.

Pretty straightforward I have about 16 and me and a male cousin decided to play truth of dare one day while he had the house to ourselves for the weekend. This was just honestly a way for us to try to punch and beat the hell out of each other, we were always completing over the dumbest shit, and prove courage without fear of the other retaliating. So after I took a dare in which I basically let him knock me out(look up fainting game) and I needed to raise the stakes. So I dared him to jack me off think this was finally my shot to sucker punch ass ass. He accepted to my shock and even finished the job and tasted it.

This eventually ended with me on my stomach while he drilled me in the ass with his quite sizable dick and us both losing our anal virginity to the other. And you know what shocked me most? Not that I was getting fucked in the ass. But that I was enjoying it. And so this lead to years of me and him meeting at my house, his house, in the woods, in cars, or behind the garage on the grass with me being the bottom 90% of the time because damn did he learn how to fuck good and I prefer getting blowjobs rather than fucking him because he couldn't take my dick without a lot of prep. We fucked countless time too, like I honestly have no idea how nobody suspected anything or heard anything because it got rough.

This ended when he moved across the country, he seemed to have gotten over it and got real into girls. Whereas I was conflicted. It wasn't till I was 19 in college that I finally had sex with a girl and it was more because she was very forceful about wanting to fuck me. Which we had a great time mind you and she's probably the reason I love thick girls so much too.

So in that's my confession. I'm still conflicted. Like the idea of being in a relationship with a guy just is not something I want, I won't even let them even attempt to kiss on me and shit, but I still like sucking dick and getting blown after that I want nothing to do with a guy Whereas women? Ooooooh I love to caress, kiss and hold a woman's body and make sweet love to a woman and would love to be in a relationship with one. So again I'm stuck. Am I straight, Bi, Gay or just a fucking horndog who likes sex regardless of gender?

Sexuality is a continuum and I am not gonna even attempt to try and figure out where I'd plop you on it.

That said, probably that last one, considering you were chill with your cousin fucking you in the ass for years.

 

[John Kowalski]

To the little anon who is 15, your relationship with your family will be much easier to understand once you get older. I hate saying stuff like this, but it's true. When i was a wee lad like yourself i didn't know what to ask and what to require from my father, who had never been present and who never knew how to be a proper parent. I valued him in a very weird way and simply did not know what to do with my relationship with him. But time has settled the sentiment and nowadays i have an easier time asserting myself in a way that truly begets his true sentiments in a way i could not before, while still keeping things around me working well. Needless to say, he simply isn't my father anymore, and i have deigned it so.

Also, push through high school and try and find some artistic passion to delve into while there, like photography or music or painting or acting or whatever. It really takes you mind off of things in a very pleasant way! It will enrich your time and give you an excuse to escape family crap.