"Viz, you tell that fu#king #unt wsoxfan1214 to go fu#k himself. If that bit#h crowds my area in front of the net with his piss poor positioning one more time I'm gonna get on my 10 speed mountain bike and pedal to whatever shithole this fu#ker calls home in Chicago and I'm gonna piss in his fu#king mailbox. I'm not talking about some slow drip piss either Viz, I'm gonna go full blown fire hose on that shit.
Viz, don't forget that #unt moop1167. You let that son of a bit#h know that if he misses one more wide open man with another one of his shitty as fu#k saucer passes, than I will swing by Chi-Town while I'm there for that other fu#ker, follow him to his cushy office job, sneak in, grab his lunch box out of the kitchen refrigerator and shit all in his oatmeal that hes planning to have for lunch. Viz I dont give a flying fu#k if people are standing right there when I do it either. And it's not gonna be one of those solid poops either, I'm gonna make sure that oatmeal is a full blown chocolate shake when I'm done.
And Viz, you remember to tell that pri#k zsswimmer that if he takes another senseless penalty during a game I'm gonna use my entire paltry life savings earned from delivering pizzas for 5 years straight to buy a plane ticket to Indonesia, Georgia or whatever 3rd world country this #unt lives in, and I'm gonna stop by all the local Piggly Wiggly's and buy out all the milk. I'm talking about every single last jug of it in the area. Swim's fu#king ass is gonna have to eat cereal without milk for a whole week. That will teach the fu#ker!.
Lastly Viz, fu#k the Chicago Blackhawks, I'm done with them. I'm from fu#king MINNESOTA anyway! I know when to get off a sinking ship and latch on with a real winner. I went out and bought my brand new Zach Parise jersey earlier today and am ready to go.