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ParentGaf OT: Birth, Bib and Beyond

How much should we pay our babysitter on Saturday night? We've only ever had family babysit but this time we're having a 18 year-old neighbor watch her for us. My daughter is 14 months old and will be sleeping the entire time. It will be from 7pm to around midnight.
 

Icefire1424

Member
How much should we pay our babysitter on Saturday night? We've only ever had family babysit but this time we're having a 18 year-old neighbor watch her for us. My daughter is 14 months old and will be sleeping the entire time. It will be from 7pm to around midnight.

I am also interested in learning what is an acceptable rate.
 
Finally got the go ahead from the wife to share a pic of Ben. He turned seven months on Monday!

Ben_zpsvzoyrpmg.jpg
 

ElNino

Member
How much should we pay our babysitter on Saturday night? We've only ever had family babysit but this time we're having a 18 year-old neighbor watch her for us. My daughter is 14 months old and will be sleeping the entire time. It will be from 7pm to around midnight.
I don't know is there is a "correct" rate, but we've been paying ours $10/hour.
 
I am also interested in learning what is an acceptable rate.

I've had people tell me that $15/hr is the bare minimum, the one time we hired a sitter, she said that's what she normally charged as well.

I'm much more inclined to say $10/hr, especially if you're talking about basically just being at the house while the kid(s) sleep.
 
That feeling when your four year old doesn't test gifted for kindergarten....not good. Tough not to feel like a complete failure of a parent. he seems bright, inquisitive and has a strangely sophisticated vocabulary, but he is pretty introverted at day care (an expensive well regarded one) and we were quite concerned about him opening up to the test giver-he warms slowly to strangers, but is talkative when comfortable. He may very well be above average but not gifted, or smart but not gifted, or even average, I don't know. I really don't want him to think that he's not good enough, which is the concern with these labels. He will be oblivious for a while obviously, for which we are thankful.

Thanks for listening, hah!
 
That feeling when your four year old doesn't test gifted for kindergarten....not good. Tough not to feel like a complete failure of a parent. he seems bright, inquisitive and has a strangely sophisticated vocabulary, but he is pretty introverted at day care (an expensive well regarded one) and we were quite concerned about him opening up to the test giver-he warms slowly to strangers, but is talkative when comfortable. He may very well be above average but not gifted, or smart but not gifted, or even average, I don't know. I really don't want him to think that he's not good enough, which is the concern with these labels. He will be oblivious for a while obviously, for which we are thankful.

Thanks for listening, hah!
Never heard of this before. Where are they assigning these labels?
 
That feeling when your four year old doesn't test gifted for kindergarten....not good. Tough not to feel like a complete failure of a parent. he seems bright, inquisitive and has a strangely sophisticated vocabulary, but he is pretty introverted at day care (an expensive well regarded one) and we were quite concerned about him opening up to the test giver-he warms slowly to strangers, but is talkative when comfortable. He may very well be above average but not gifted, or smart but not gifted, or even average, I don't know. I really don't want him to think that he's not good enough, which is the concern with these labels. He will be oblivious for a while obviously, for which we are thankful.

Thanks for listening, hah!

I wouldn't put too much weight into the tests given for the gifted program. There's no surefire way to tell if a child is "gifted," especially if it's just a quick test from a stranger on one day. Human beings are more complex than that. All he's missing out on is some extra curricular activities that you can supplement elsewhere :)
 
So my wife and I are trying to plan a trip somewhere before her maternity leave ends in July. Is it crazy to try and take a 3-4 month old on a vacation? Anyone have any experience?
 

Ensoul

Member
That feeling when your four year old doesn't test gifted for kindergarten....not good. Tough not to feel like a complete failure of a parent. he seems bright, inquisitive and has a strangely sophisticated vocabulary, but he is pretty introverted at day care (an expensive well regarded one) and we were quite concerned about him opening up to the test giver-he warms slowly to strangers, but is talkative when comfortable. He may very well be above average but not gifted, or smart but not gifted, or even average, I don't know. I really don't want him to think that he's not good enough, which is the concern with these labels. He will be oblivious for a while obviously, for which we are thankful.

Thanks for listening, hah!

Seems kind of weird that your feel like a complete failure of a parent because your child, who is in kindergarten doesn't test gifted. There are tons of way to fail as a parent and what you mentioned isn't one of them. Every kids learns and developers at a different pace.


So my wife and I are trying to plan a trip somewhere before her maternity leave ends in July. Is it crazy to try and take a 3-4 month old on a vacation? Anyone have any experience?

When my son was 5 months old we rented a house in Maine for a week. Went to the beach, shopping, took him for walks etc. Having a newborn on plane or staying in a hotel may be too much.
 

Ensoul

Member
What about staying in a hotel do you think would be a problem?

It gets loud there, if the baby is trying to nap. I am not sure if your child sleeps through the night yet but the crying at say 3AM may be a problem for some other people. Space can be an issue as well.

It is doable though.
 
Never heard of this before. Where are they assigning these labels?

Houston. It's extremely competitive here and if you don't qualify you are shut out of the lottery for the top elementary schools unless you live in the zone (which is incredibly expensive, far more than we can afford and we do well financially). There is a wide gulf here between the good schools and the failing schools and not many in the middle, very bi modal.

I wouldn't put too much weight into the tests given for the gifted program. There's no surefire way to tell if a child is "gifted," especially if it's just a quick test from a stranger on one day. Human beings are more complex than that. All he's missing out on is some extra curricular activities that you can supplement elsewhere :)

I know, we understand that rationally.That is the plan, to supplement everything. Luckily due to this we are basically forced to move to the burbs where we will have quite a bit more flexibility with money, space, and activities. The move was probably going to happen regardless due to low chances I. The school lottery, this is just an internal disappointment really.

Seems kind of weird that your feel like a complete failure of a parent because your child, who is in kindergarten doesn't test gifted. There are tons of way to fail as a parent and what you mentioned isn't one of them. Every kids learns and developers at a different pace.

Oh I know, it's just tough. Particularly on my wife. I think we feel like we let a few things go due to having two challenging careers, lawyer and professor, and having no family support network and a baby in the house. Too much iPad and minecraft while we try to juggle everything else. Need to find a better balance. Like I said earlier, we are now moving so we can essentially reboot a few aspects of our lives.
 
It gets loud there, if the baby is trying to nap. I am not sure if your child sleeps through the night yet but the crying at say 3AM may be a problem for some other people. Space can be an issue as well.

It is doable though.

Ah I see, interesting point of view. I don't think that is much of an issue for Pete as we currently live in a small packed apartment complex. The plane is probably my biggest concern right now.
 

Halcyon

Member
I'm back at work after most of the week off and at home with my wife/baby.


It actually went a little better than I was expecting it would. My wife is breastfeeding so she's been more taking the slack during the night, and then I was watching her during the day between feedings so she could catch up on sleep.

I'm interested to see how it goes next week when I'm at work all week. My daughter seems to sleep in 3-3.5 hour chunks during the night though so it's not really that awful so far.
 

Ensoul

Member
Ah I see, interesting point of view. I don't think that is much of an issue for Pete as we currently live in a small packed apartment complex. The plane is probably my biggest concern right now.

The baby will probably start screaming when his or her ears pop and the air pressure changes on the plane etc. It may be stressful for you guys if that happens.

Have to give you credit if you go on a plane, my kids were 9 and 6 before I had the nerve to take them on a plane!
 
The baby will probably start screaming when his or her ears pop and the air pressure changes on the plane etc. It may be stressful for you guys if that happens.

Have to give you credit if you go on a plane, my kids were 9 and 6 before I had the nerve to take them on a plane!

Heh, don't give me any credit yet.

I'm back at work after most of the week off and at home with my wife/baby.


It actually went a little better than I was expecting it would. My wife is breastfeeding so she's been more taking the slack during the night, and then I was watching her during the day between feedings so she could catch up on sleep.

I'm interested to see how it goes next week when I'm at work all week. My daughter seems to sleep in 3-3.5 hour chunks during the night though so it's not really that awful so far.

When you are completely gone all day its going to be rough on your wife I can promise you that. I just try to help my wife as much as possible when I am home and maybe do some things ahead of time to make things easier on her like making snacks/lunch for the day.
 
We had to take our kid on a plane at 4 months last November. He slept through the whole thing. An absolute delight. We got compliments from everyone about how nervous they were when they sat down near us. He's a pretty happy, chill dude.

Here's Miles at 8 months:'

fuLf4Xkl.jpg
 
We had to take our kid on a plane at 4 months last November. He slept through the whole thing. An absolute delight. We got compliments from everyone about how nervous they were when they sat down near us. He's a pretty happy, chill dude.

Here's Miles at 8 months:'

fuLf4Xkl.jpg

Pete has red hair and blue eyes too. Hopefully that is the magic combo for baby plane skills.
 

Halcyon

Member
When you are completely gone all day its going to be rough on your wife I can promise you that. I just try to help my wife as much as possible when I am home and maybe do some things ahead of time to make things easier on her like making snacks/lunch for the day.

I will definitely be doing this. All week I was basically Mr. Mom and waiting on her every need, keeping the house cleaned, making food, etc. Luckily her mom lives a few miles away and has all day, so she's gonna come over and fill more of that roll next week.

The hardest part this week was that my wife couldn't really get around the house all that well, and I didn't want her straining needlessly. I went into hardcore handyman mode though and got tons of stuff setup that I was kinda putting off. Laying around in bed all day wasn't really working for me.
 
Of course, after Ben is born, my company announces plans for paid leave after the birth of a baby.

Great benefit...just a year too late. Oh well, at least I hired on the last year before they took away our pension.
 
Gotta hit all the baby pictures...


Almost three, and so much more of a handful than her brother ever has been at any age. My god. I feel like I spend all day playing real-life Who's Your Daddy. But she's also so fun and funny (when I'm not tearing my hair out).

http://i.imgur.com/5PWnpv2.png[IMG][/QUOTE]

Wow. Gorgeous kid. At least fun and funny take the edge off of the trouble-making a bit!


[quote="Halcyon, post: 198817633"]My daughter was born on Saturday early am. She is my little angel.

2 days old[/QUOTE]

Congrats, Halcyon. Evelyn is a very pretty name. We'd considered it too, but for some reason, half of my husbands friends all named their kids variations of "Eve." There's Eve, Evie, Eva... :P


[quote="BudokaiMR2, post: 198967474"]I almost forgot there is a thread where I am free to turn into a silly dopey parent without anyone judging me! ^^

Last week was Hayato's 2nd birthday, so we [URL="https://vine.co/v/iwzO9ztpYIV"]got him a racetrack set for all of his toy cars.[/URL]


On Sunday, my wife went to a friend's wedding so it was one of the rare instances where I had him to myself the whole day.
I decided to take him to the new Kyoto Pokemon Center to buy him some late birthday presents just from me and to hopefully have him meet one of the Pikachu mascots they trot out on occassion.

It was hard to get good videos since the store was so packed, but [URL="https://vine.co/v/idd6MeuBbJm"]I did manage to get one good video showing his face light up as he pets Pikachu[/URL].

I let him pick some toys off the shelf at the store, and the lil guy is already proving he has good taste in Pokemans![/QUOTE]


Very cute! Nice work starting him on the gaming road already. :)


[quote="Skiptastic, post: 199113916"]Finally got the go ahead from the wife to share a pic of Ben. He turned seven months on Monday![/QUOTE]

D'aww. He looks like the youngest professional golfer ever.


[quote="Mango Positive, post: 199195662"]We had to take our kid on a plane at 4 months last November. He slept through the whole thing. An absolute delight. We got compliments from everyone about how nervous they were when they sat down near us. He's a pretty happy, chill dude.

Here's Miles at 8 months:'

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/fuLf4Xkl.jpg

Great pic! Hoping ours performs as well on a flight too. A 30+ hour flight to Manchester... ;_;
 

Keri

Member
It's the rarest combination in the world, being unique is a great thing.

My brother and I both have red hair and blue eyes. Every once in a while we like to high-five each other for being part of the 1%. I don't know if either of these recessive traits will make it to my little guy, but they are pretty neat.
 
2 nights in a row now with virtually no sleep. Almost 9 months and this kid still won't stay down for more than two hours.

I feel ya. I think I got a cumulative 40 minutes over the course of last night's constant feedings and changings. I feel like something scraped off the bottom of a shoe.

This kind of thing is unusual at 9 months, though, right? Have you guys seen or considered a sleep specialist? That's what my sister-in-law had to do eventually.
 

Halcyon

Member
Congrats, Halcyon. Evelyn is a very pretty name. We'd considered it too, but for some reason, half of my husbands friends all named their kids variations of "Eve." There's Eve, Evie, Eva... :p

Yea we didn't have any previous bad feelings or known associations with anyone named remotely close to Evelyn so it was a good choice.

We're going with Evy "eh-vee" for short while she's a little cute pile of fun. Then when she gets older she can do whatever she wants with it.

Here's a picture of me trying to eat my baby apparently.

 
Poor Mia has been increasingly gassy/rumbly in the stomach, but my husband is reluctant to introduce any medication-type stuff in her system (wind drops, anti-gas stuff), so I'm going to try cutting dairy from my diet to see if that's the culprit. It's seriously depressing me, though. The wonderful frothy latte my husband would make for me in the morning was the only thing getting me through some of these no sleep nights. *sigh*

Anyone had success lessening gas issues by cutting dairy? It seems to be the most recommended thing online, but I'd be gutted if I was doing this for nothing.


I have one coworker who said her daughter put her through a similar experience the entire first year. Pediatrician says 9 months is typically when poor sleepers start to improve, and we're right on the cusp of that. We'll see.

My brain is shot. It's jelly. It's the tacky burnt somethings bubbled to a pan forgotten on the stove too long. Today after lunch I put the bread in the fridge and milk in the cupboard. I'm vacuous, friable, out of commission.

9 months, huh? I'm impressed your brain even has a jelly-like consistency at this rate. I'm only one month in and I feel like I've dropped a couple hundred IQ points.


So I was getting ready for a shooting game event at a local game store and I decided to snap these pics of my boys. I think they will inherit the soul of Takahashi Meijin now that they've touched the carts. Top picture is Jacob, bottom is Andrew, both 4 months old now.

Very cute! Be sure to make sure they touch some other classics too. You want them to be well-rounded, after all.


Yea we didn't have any previous bad feelings or known associations with anyone named remotely close to Evelyn so it was a good choice.

We're going with Evy "eh-vee" for short while she's a little cute pile of fun. Then when she gets older she can do whatever she wants with it.

Here's a picture of me trying to eat my baby apparently.

Babies...the tenderest of meats.
 
The wonderful frothy latte my husband would make for me in the morning was the only thing getting me through some of these no sleep nights. *sigh*
Not that I have any insight regarding the gas, but our pediatrician actually told my wife not to consume caffeine while breastfeeding. Alcohol is somehow okay, though.
 
My wife cut out dairy and soy. It seemed to help. I don't think simethicone has been shown to be effective in babies, so gas drops probably won't do anything. How do you like almond or coconut milk? They don't froth as nicely but you can still use them as creamer for coffee.

I've tried soy and almond milk in coffee before and it's...foul. :( It definitely doesn't froth or mix properly, either. I've switched to tea, but it's just not the same, y'know?

For the cutting bit, glad to know it might have some effect. It's only been two days, but she does seem slightly better, I have to admit. And the drops don't help? The moms on the WTE forums have been raving about Infacoil or gripe water, etc., saying it's been great. If it got worse I was thinking of trying it now that she's a month old. Will ask the midwife about it/simethicone. Cheers.


Not that I have any insight regarding the gas, but our pediatrician actually told my wife not to consume caffeine while breastfeeding. Alcohol is somehow okay, though.

Really? :/ Why is pregnancy such a trial even after? You don't get any sleep AND caffeine (the only joy in a no-sleep life) is bad? The midwives never mentioned it to me, but I'll ask today during her check-up. Thanks for the heads up. Yay for beer, at least.

How'd the birth go, btw? Last update was labor.
 
Really? :/ Why is pregnancy such a trial even after? You don't get any sleep AND caffeine (the only joy in a no-sleep life) is bad? The midwives never mentioned it to me, but I'll ask today during her check-up. Thanks for the heads up. Yay for beer, at least.

How'd the birth go, btw? Last update was labor.
It didn't exactly go as expected, or as my wife wanted, but we have a healthy baby boy! His due date was supposed to be mid-April, though, so that was another surprise. He's technically 90 minutes pre-term.

But yeah, he lost about 9% of his body weight in the first two days, so we are supplementing with formula, and we have our first pediatrician visit tomorrow.

Sleep would be nice.

EDIT: Regarding the alcohol, the doc actually said it helps to increase milk production, but you need to give it about an hour between taking a drink and breastfeeding. The lactation consultant at the hospital also added that, if you party hard and drink a whole lot, "pump and dump," just to be safe.
 
Very cute! Nice work starting him on the gaming road already. :)

Thanks! I am just happy he showed an interest in a property other than Anpanman.
I have a pretty high tolerance for shows aimed primarily at kids, but watching anything Anpanman makes me feel like my brain is slowly oozing out of my ears. Not really sure why.

After showing him the Pokemon anime one morning on TV he seemed to immediately fall in love with Pikachu.

Anyone in here with a 2-3 year old have experience with them being a little bit too physical with other kids? I only saw it myself for the first time over this weekend, but Hayato has a tendency to push some of his other friends. Sometimes even hard enough to knock them to the ground!

We aren't even sure where he picked up the habit. He tends to follow around older kids and try to copy them when we at playgrounds so I am guessing he might have seen some middle school kids do it or something...
 

Goodlife

Member
Anyone else "struggle" to deal with their kids growing up?
Not in a bad way, just a "oh my god, I can't believe they aren't babies anymore"

We had 3 kids fairly close together. Eldest is 5, middle one is 3, youngest is 2. So for 5 years solid we've had "babies" in the house. Nappies, feeding kids etc etc.

But, now the youngest is getting older, she's starting to move out of that stage.
First thing that hit me was getting rid of the cot.
The we redecorated our beautiful nursery into a boring guest room (all 3 kids want to share a room together at the moment)
She's starting to be potty trained, so nappies are getting less.
And, this morning, we got rid of the high chair.

Really feeling it, want to stop / reverse time.
 

zbarron

Member
In my experience, even consultants and midwives fall prey to anecdote. Infacol is simethicone and has not been proven to work:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8008533

Gripe water can be anything, so it's important to pay special attention to labels. If you decide to try it, make sure there is no alcohol in the formulation you choose. Mommy's Bliss is the brand I see most often, and is basically water with fennel and ginger extract. Classic folk remedies for upset stomach. Probably does nothing at all. But as long as you are careful about picking a safe formulation, the worst that can happen is baby will remain gassy and you'll be out $10 or so.

That's the brand we used. Nick really loved it. I don't know if it was effective for gas, but even if he was screaming, a calm would come over him as soon as he got some. I don't know if there is any sugar in it or if it just tastes better than the formula (which I wouldn't drink if you paid me.) but it worked at least for a while. I tried it once more recently and he's calm when drinking it but was back to fussing after he was done. He's obviously bigger than before so maybe I needed to give him more of it.

We're back on the Miralax train with him by the way and once again it worked like a dream. He still had thrush and was still constipated so he's been super fussy for weeks but the pediatrician gave him a medicine to ingest that will clear it out of his whole system. not just where we paint purple, and he's getting the constipation cleared up so hopefully he's feeling better.
 

Browny

Banned
That's the brand we used. Nick really loved it. I don't know if it was effective for gas, but even if he was screaming, a calm would come over him as soon as he got some. I don't know if there is any sugar in it or if it just tastes better than the formula (which I wouldn't drink if you paid me.) but it worked at least for a while. I tried it once more recently and he's calm when drinking it but was back to fussing after he was done. He's obviously bigger than before so maybe I needed to give him more of it.

Another vote for Infacol here. Used it with our first (bottle fed) and our second (breast), and it certainly helped. Our first had it for probably 6 months, our second only for a month or two - so probably more effective with bottle-fed babies.

Not sure if the recipe is different between countries though (UK here).
 
Anyone else "struggle" to deal with their kids growing up?
Not in a bad way, just a "oh my god, I can't believe they aren't babies anymore"

We had 3 kids fairly close together. Eldest is 5, middle one is 3, youngest is 2. So for 5 years solid we've had "babies" in the house. Nappies, feeding kids etc etc.

But, now the youngest is getting older, she's starting to move out of that stage.
First thing that hit me was getting rid of the cot.
The we redecorated our beautiful nursery into a boring guest room (all 3 kids want to share a room together at the moment)
She's starting to be potty trained, so nappies are getting less.
And, this morning, we got rid of the high chair.

Really feeling it, want to stop / reverse time.

My youngest turned 10 on Sunday. It's weird, but I can't say I'm struggling with it. Watching my kids turn into like, actual people with personalities and ambitions and ideas about the world has just been cool as shit.

In a way, I can't wait for them to get older and be able to share more with them.
 

zbarron

Member
Another vote for Infacol here. Used it with our first (bottle fed) and our second (breast), and it certainly helped. Our first had it for probably 6 months, our second only for a month or two - so probably more effective with bottle-fed babies.

Not sure if the recipe is different between countries though (UK here).

I was unclear. Mommy's Bliss is the brand we use but it seems similar.

Glad you had similarly positive results.
 

Icefire1424

Member
Our daughter had a particularly sensitive stomach at first, my wife needing to essentially give up dairy, red meat, beans...almost everything. Got to the point where we did decide to transition her over to formula a bit earlier than we planned for (at around 6 months), but it made a tremendous difference. If I recall, the Similac Sensitive did the trick.

Pretty funny now that I think about it, since at two she does not like "bland" foods at all. The more flavorful, the better. Granted, the wife did eat a lot of cajun / creole when pregnant, which I think might be coming into play a bit here :)
 
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