WCW Monday Nitro 8/10/98
On the heels of what was no doubt the worst PPV of the year so far, Nitro comes to you live from Rapid City, South Dakota. I find it strange that any city in South Dakota has any kind of arena. So on this shitty PPV PE vs Dancing Fools was the second longest match, Goldberg was the odd man out in an nWo battle royal that didn't even go 8 minutes and he won via pinfall, and Hulk Hogan sold harder for Jay Leno in 30 seconds than he did for Sting in any of their matches. They're not allowed to say who won or what happened in the main event, but later in the show, management will come out to tell us. Okay. Giant/Hall vs Wolfpac for the tag titles and Goldberg vs Meng for the title.
Barbarian vs Jim Duggan
I don't drop "the". Barbarian is what he's officially announced as. This feud thing between these guys and Meng is terrible. There was even an explanation for why Meng turned on Barbarian. He just did. Duggan wins with a roll up OUTTA NOWHERE. Hugh runs in and they beat up on Duggan until Meng comes out. How many times do I have to watch this? Meng even puts Doug Dillinger in the deathgrip, then kicks some other security dude. Some random scrub runs in and gets it, too.
Recap of Lex being laid out on Nitro and then his promo from Thunder.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Lex is the guest. Lex won't leave until he gets a match for fight from Bret Hart. This match was already announced, so I don't know why they're pretending it's a made up on the spot kind of thing. Bret calls Lex a damn liar and that he wasn't involved in the beat down last week. He goes on to say that Sting is like a brother to him. Bret agrees to a title match tonight. BUT IT WAS ALREADY BOOKED AND ANNOUNCED. Tony even mentioned that at the start of the segment.
Tokyo Magnum vs Eddie Guerrero
After the poor performance of Tokyo at the PPV, they make this match as a test for him. If he doesn't win, he can't be with the group anymore. Alex calls him a "stupid little Japanese" and tells him to commit hari kari. Eddie wins very easily. I guess this mean Magnum is about to go back to Japan.
Saturn vs Kanyon
Maybe we'll get some gifs a half hour into the show. They go right at it with some stiff punches and knees. Saturn hits a belly to belly and an awkward STO. Kanyon comes back with a super fameasser and skull fuck. Electric chair drop. Saturn scores a small package, but Kanyon comes back with an elbow. Sleeper reversals. A lot of them. Explodaaah. Kanyon sets Saturn up on the ropes and hits a hanging neckbreaker. He goes up top for something. Saturn catches him and hits a top rope gargoyle suplex after slipping a few times. Lodi distracts the ref and Raven hits an Evenflow on Saturn. Kanyon rolls over and makes the pin. BANG!
TO THE BACK. Meng is putting random security people in the deathgrip.
Sick Boy vs Steve McMichael
Two guys who botch in every match. Two guys who can barely even walk to the ring without botching. Let's put them in a match on live TV. Mongo wins with the tombstone.
Hogan, Bischoff, and Beefcake come out. DDP isn't in the building tonight. Hogan basically just brushes DDP and Leno aside and says he wants his title back. Bischoff hints that they might have set Meng on the war path to get rid of security so they can go after Goldberg tonight. The nWo will now act as security for the match with Meng.
We've just been given a response from production and the Wolfpac says that they will also be security for the title match tonight.
Stevie Ray vs Chavo Guerrero Jr. WCW TV Championship
Chavo shouldn't be getting a rematch. Jericho comes out with Pepe before the match. This lures Chavo to the back where Jericho apparently beats Chavo up.
Chris Jericho vs Stevie Ray WCW TV Championship
Stevie almost corpses when Jericho talks about the mean streets of Calgary. Stevie out powers Jericho. Jericho tries to come back with his speed and almost gets the win with a crucifix. Stevie then boots Jericho in the face. He hits a scary looking suplex on to the ropes. Jericho hits a cross body to the floor. He tries one in the ring and gets caught with a powerslam. The ref "accidentally" gets low blowed. The Giant runs out and chokeslams Stevie. Lol wat? Jericho puts Stevie in the Liontamer. The ref calls for the bell. New champion!
Bischoff and Liz come out. Bischoff decides to break the gag order on the events of the main event at Road Wild. He shows a series of pictures only of he and Hogan in control, and even claims they won. Then he implores us to not watch the Tonight Show and that Jay stole food.
Lizmark Jr. vs Hypnosis vs Rey Mysterio Jr.
I'll just give you the gifs. Rey wins.
Lex Luger vs Bret Hart WCW US Championship
Who would guess that the co-winners of the 1994 Royal Rumble would be in a random match for the US Championship on Nitro? Lex over powers Bret, who rolls to the floor to regain some composure. Bret for some reason tries a test of strength. Bret decides he's done and leaves. Lex throws him back in the ring. Lex then works over an arm bar for a while. Why would Lex work over the arm if his move is the torture rack? Bret gets back into it with an eye rake and stomps a mudhole in the corner. After the break, Bret is slamming Lex on the floor. Lex makes a come back, but Bret kicks him right in the dick. Bret wants the ref to disqualify him for it. Bret starts the 5MOD. DDT. Lex might be as bad as Konnan. Lex hits two atomic drops and the flying forearm, but Bret still gets out. Ref bump. The international object comes out. Lex gets Bret up in the torture rack. He taps out. New champion! Really? Already? Bret just got the title. The rest of the Wolfpac come out to celebrate, which coincides with the hour 3 pyro.
Juventud Guerrera vs Kidman WCW Cruiserweight Championship
NO. Not again. Kidman looks very clean, though. White tank top, hair isn't messy. They do nothing new at all and Juvi wins in a fairly short match.
Bret will get his rematch on Thunder. We're then shown the real highlights of the Leno match.
The Flock come to the ring. Raven says the Flock has let him down. He Evenflows Riggs and decks Lodi. He starts slapping Whoreass, who stops him, but gets hit anyway.
Raven vs Whoreass
This is allegedly a punishment for the Flock. I think it is a punishment for me. It goes to the floor early on. Horace hits a suicide dive. A stop sign is set up in the comer. Raven goes flying in to it. Horace slams him on it and goes for a Superfly splash. He misses. Raven demands Lodi give him a chair. Drop toe hold. Kanyon comes out, but the Flock prevents him from entering the ring. Saturn came out from the other side and hit a DVD on the stop sign. He throws Horace on top of Raven. Horace wins!
Curt Hennig vs Konnan
WCW clearly doesn't have any problem putting on a weak Nitro after a shitty PPV. Why hasn't Hennig taken time off for his leg injury? Konnan gets disqualified for choking Perfect with his chain.
The Giant/Scott Hall vs Kevin Nash/Sting WCW Tag Team Championships
Hall and Nash start out. Nash goes for the powerbomb early, but Hall bails. Hall gets back in and does his shoulder block thing. He slaps Nash around, but Nash just puts him on his ass. Nash hits his elbows and knees in the corner, so he's used up all but 2 of his moves already. Giant hits a low blow from the apron. Big boot to Giant. Nash has wrestled this entire match. How weird. He makes the hot tag. One punch sends Giant over the top. Face buster and Stinger splashes to Hall. Deathlock. Giant walks in the ring and grabs the ref instead of just hitting a defenseless Sting. He demands to be disqualified. The ref does it and Giant chokeslams him anyway. I don't get that at all. He just walked right by Sting, who was wide open, to yell at the ref to disqualify him.
Goldberg vs Meng WCW Championship
Both nWo groups are "security", so this is basically a lumberjack match. Meng backs Goldberg into the corner. Goldberg comes back with a flying...something, but just bounces off of Meng. Meng then does a bizarre roll to the floor. Goldberg hits a spin kick and a knee bar. He runs into a Meng boot and bounces out to the floor. The nWo start fighting. Tongan deathgrip! Goldberg went down, but Meng just randomly let go for no reason. For weeks and all night tonight, Meng wouldn't let go of the hold for 2 minutes and needed 5 people to pull him off, but in a title match where he actually had Goldberg down and out, he just decides to let go and pose. Goldberg gets up and hits the spear and jackhammer for the win. Hogan sneaks in and hits Goldberg with a chair. Nash takes the chair away from Hogan. Goldberg gets up and thinks Nash him him, even though Nash got in the ring right in front of Goldberg after Goldberg had been hit. Goldberg spears Nash. WE'RE OUTTA TIME!
I really didn't expect WCW 1998 to break me, but it is getting close. For starters, DDP and PE weren't even on the show, but the people they beat at the PPV were. Hogan just completely dropped the DDP feud and is moving on to Goldberg. The nWo feud isn't leading to anything. They already split up. There really isn't anywhere else for that to go. Nash isn't really doing anything with the Hall program. Goldberg is now thrown into the nWo shit, which is the same thing that all the top faces have been doing for 2 years now. Hogan is going after him, but as we all know, that doesn't even happen.
It felt like they were hoping that Lex beating Hart for the US Championship would be the same thing as Lex beating Hogan in 1997, with the main difference being Bret has had the title for 2 weeks and didn't even really have a match to win it. I'm sure Bret is going to win it right back at Thunder. His beef is with Sting, not Lex, but Lex has actually done more in the feud than Sting. The majority of Hollywood matches still end in run in DQs. Now they're getting themselves disqualified just to not have finishes. The finish with the tag match made no sense to me. The finish to Juvi/Jericho was pretty weird, too. Meng letting go of his hold to pose after being shown to NEVER let go was pretty weird. Giant coming out to help Jericho win (which wasn't mentioned again on the show) was pretty weird.
Everything with Kanyon/Raven/Saturn is confusing. Kanyon hates Raven, but hates Saturn, but teams up with Saturn, but fights Saturn, and sometimes helps Raven, but hates Raven more than Saturn, but Saturn hates both of them, but sometimes helps....who fucking knows. I don't get it and it doesn't feel like any of the guys involved really understand it, either.