So I asked her out.

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O

Onemic

Member
FortunateSon said:
I think that's it right there. Talk about taking advantage of the situation. I'm a generally very generous tipper as it is. And the fact that I'm a regular there as well.

But here's the thing, as I explained; she goes out of her way to do things for us when she serves us. And she DEFINITELY DOESN'T do the SAME to her other clients / customers that she serves.
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YA THINK?
 
C

CrocMother

Banned
Aselith said:
Maybe I can make you feel better by telling a story about how much worse this could have been for you, OP.

So anyways I eat at a local Subway a lot because it's near my job and there was a girl that worked there that I liked and she seemed to like me too. Like she was really chatty with me and a couple of times made comments about how I never stayed to eat and would talk to me even if someone else was working on my order. Nothing super overt but enough to give me some hope that she was interested.

So flash forward a week or two and I get up the nerve to ask her out and I don't like to do that to people at work but no one else was around at the time so I figured it'd be ok. "Hey, what's the worst that can happen, she says no?" So I ask her out and she says no I have a boyfriend, etc. Not a problem. Didn't say anything weird, just like, "Hey do you want to go out and get some dinner this weekend?" kind of thing.But I still want to go get subs so I continue to go and act normal, it's not a big deal.

Except not for her. Every time I go in there, she books it to the back as soon as she sees me. Like literally she is walking out and sees me and then turns around and RUNS to the back. And that starts to make me super fucking uncomfortable going in there understandably like holy shit what is she telling her coworkers about me, do they ALL think I'm some creep or what?

So after a second day of this, I cannot take it anymore and avoid the place for like 3 months and finally one day much later I go in hoping if she's there it will finally be normal again and blessedly she is gone.

At least your waitress isn't treating you like a rapist because you asked her on a date.
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She probably has low self-esteem. She does work at a Subway after all. If you really liked her find peace in the fact that you at least made her feel better about herself by asking her out.

Either that or she is a teenager.
 
V

ViewtifulJC

Banned
onemic said:
YA THINK?
Click to expand...

IDK man, I think she just really likes me, and honestly if she didn't have a BF we might be dating already. I think I'm just gonna stay friends and wait it out a bit, ya know? Who knows what could happen.

Don't you believe in love, Onemic?

But I'm totally over her.
 
B

Bam Bam Baklava

Member
Aselith said:
Maybe I can make you feel better by telling a story about how much worse this could have been for you, OP.

So anyways I eat at a local Subway a lot because it's near my job and there was a girl that worked there that I liked and she seemed to like me too. Like she was really chatty with me and a couple of times made comments about how I never stayed to eat and would talk to me even if someone else was working on my order. Nothing super overt but enough to give me some hope that she was interested.

So flash forward a week or two and I get up the nerve to ask her out and I don't like to do that to people at work but no one else was around at the time so I figured it'd be ok. "Hey, what's the worst that can happen, she says no?" So I ask her out and she says no I have a boyfriend, etc. Not a problem. Didn't say anything weird, just like, "Hey do you want to go out and get some dinner this weekend?" kind of thing.But I still want to go get subs so I continue to go and act normal, it's not a big deal.

Except not for her. Every time I go in there, she books it to the back as soon as she sees me. Like literally she is walking out and sees me and then turns around and RUNS to the back. And that starts to make me super fucking uncomfortable going in there understandably like holy shit what is she telling her coworkers about me, do they ALL think I'm some creep or what?

So after a second day of this, I cannot take it anymore and avoid the place for like 3 months and finally one day much later I go in hoping if she's there it will finally be normal again and blessedly she is gone.

At least your waitress isn't treating you like a rapist because you asked her on a date.
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That's fucked up.

CrocMother said:
She probably has low self-esteem. She does work at a Subway after all. If you really liked her find peace in the fact that you at least made her feel better about herself by asking her out.
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Doesn't like it to me. But, I guess it's better to go on believing that than the other way around. Not like you can ever know for sure.
 
?

(._.)

Banned
LMAO OP, get real.... you're dealing with a waitress....... she wants a tip and is doing her job well. not like every girl that's nice to you wants to date you man..... wooooow @ you
 
V

ViewtifulJC

Banned
eternal_sunshine.jpg


"Why do I fall in love with every woman that shows me the least bit of attention?"
 
L

loosus

Banned
I had the alleged-rapist thing happen once, too. It was at a video store, though. All I can say is this: if there is any decent chance that you might need to see a person again, don't ask them out unless you are pretty fucking sure they won't react like shitheads.

Oh, and coworkers are out of the question from the get-go. TRUST ME; DON'T DO IT. After I split up with a coworker and got another girlfriend, having to tell that girlfriend about my past with my coworker was...bad. Just really bad. It was SUCH a relief when that coworker got another job somewhere else.
 
A

Aselith

Member
CrocMother said:
She probably has low self-esteem. She does work at a Subway after all. If you really liked her find peace in the fact that you at least made her feel better about herself by asking her out.

Either that or she is a teenager.
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Haha yeah. I was thinking that at the time too. Like I thought she was early 20's but I definitely considered that possibility after she started acting bugged out about it. Guess i should have carded her before asking.
 
B

bjb

Banned
I tend to agree with many of the recent posts. OP is completely oblivious and seemingly fishing for posts that will tell him what he wants to hear.

loosus said:
I had the alleged-rapist thing happen once, too. It was at a video store, though.
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Sounds fascinating. Please elaborate.
 
D

dried

Neo Member
So many people in this thread (try so hard to) sound like experts on this matter. OP, maybe the right approach is to first be honest to yourself about it, whatever that may be, and then decide on how to pursue the matter. If you decide to pursue her (again), and if you get rejected, then this can serve as a life lesson. If you really are not interested in getting into a romantic relationship, then I guess continue doing whatever it is you are doing?
 
S

Satch

Banned
dried said:
So many people in this thread (try so hard to) sound like experts on this matter. OP, maybe the right approach is to first be honest to yourself about it, whatever that may be, and then decide on how to pursue the matter. If you decide to pursue her (again), and if you get rejected, then this can serve as a life lesson. If you really are not interested in getting into a romantic relationship, then I guess continue doing whatever it is you are doing?
Click to expand...

are you an expert
 
F

frequency

Member
dried said:
So many people in this thread (try so hard to) sound like experts on this matter. OP, maybe the right approach is to first be honest to yourself about it, whatever that may be, and then decide on how to pursue the matter. If you decide to pursue her (again), and if you get rejected, then this can serve as a life lesson. If you really are not interested in getting into a romantic relationship, then I guess continue doing whatever it is you are doing?
Click to expand...

It doesn't look good when the first thing you do is criticize other posters opinions... and then directly follow with your own. What makes your opinion better than everyone else's?
 
V

ViewtifulJC

Banned
frequency said:
It doesn't look good when the first thing you do is criticize other posters opinions... and then directly follow with your own. What makes your opinion better than everyone else's?
Click to expand...

OP just shot himself in the foot.

I don't know how much the rest of you know about nice guys getting women(I'm an expert), but honor and shame are huge parts of it. It's not like it is in Jersey Shore where you can become successful by being an asshole. If you screwing up getting with someone as a nice guy you bring shame to yourself, and the only way to get rid of that shame is trying again, or not trying, or something?
 
C

CygnusXS

will gain confidence one day
loosus said:
I had the alleged-rapist thing happen once, too. It was at a video store, though. All I can say is this: if there is any decent chance that you might need to see a person again, don't ask them out unless you are pretty fucking sure they won't react like shitheads.

Oh, and coworkers are out of the question from the get-go. TRUST ME; DON'T DO IT. After I split up with a coworker and got another girlfriend, having to tell that girlfriend about my past with my coworker was...bad. Just really bad. It was SUCH a relief when that coworker got another job somewhere else.
Click to expand...

My ex and my current girlfriend are working together on the same executive committee of the same student organization. I'm part of the executive too. Fun times! (Actually, no problems so far, but we'll see how it goes.)
 
O

Onemic

Member
ViewtifulJC said:
IDK man, I think she just really likes me, and honestly if she didn't have a BF we might be dating already. I think I'm just gonna stay friends and wait it out a bit, ya know? Who knows what could happen.

Don't you believe in love, Onemic?

But I'm totally over her.
Click to expand...

Go for it dude, love never dies!

dried said:
So many people in this thread (try so hard to) sound like experts on this matter. OP, maybe the right approach is to first be honest to yourself about it, whatever that may be, and then decide on how to pursue the matter. If you decide to pursue her (again), and if you get rejected, then this can serve as a life lesson. If you really are not interested in getting into a romantic relationship, then I guess continue doing whatever it is you are doing?
Click to expand...

Criticize people on being 'experts' and then give 'expert' advice.
 
A

apocalidiot

Banned
I'm convinced that the OP is socially retarded due to every other post or thread he's made, so this thread is even more hilarious.

I mean he made a thread asking how to make mixed drinks for chrissakes
 
Y

yogloo

Member
I think OP has a fair chance of being with the girl. Sometimes girls love to play mind games, play hard to get.
OP should give her more attention and show perseverance. Girls don't like quitters.
 
D

dried

Neo Member
to those who replied to my comment- I did not try/pretend to be expert. I did not present my suggestions as the only way to approach/look at the situation, like many of the posts. I did not pretend to fully understand the OP and his situation. I merely gave him some suggestions with "maybe's," and I did not call him out for anything. If my post came out like how some of you are accusing me of doing, then it's a problem with my wordings. I will try to be clear in the future.
 
K

Karsticles

Member
FortunateSon said:
And it happened. But she said "no, I have a boyfriend". And it was over; right there and then. But the problem? I can't seem to figure her intentions out. Me and my friends have been regulars at this sports bar for about 5 years +++ and counting. So we know pretty much everyone there that comes and goes.

So we go back there AFTER me asking her out and she was our waitress (it has been twice) and it was not awkward or anything. We just kept on talking, casually and whatnot. As if the whole me asking her out thing didn't happen. Guess we both brushed it off quickly and just moved on. But seriously, there was no awkwardness coming from me or her.

So here's the question, she talks to me a lot, flirts, asks questions, blushes, touches here and there and all these happen after I already asked her out but she said "no.." so what is she trying to prove? Does she just want to be my friend? If so, I'm cool with that but how do I go about doing that? Lmao.

Now, is it wrong if I just invited her to one of my parties in the future if I had one? Just a friendly invite. Nothing more. As it stands, me and my friends think she doesn't have a boyfriend (she was just lying). It's an assumption, not a fact just from the way she acts around us.
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It's not about you. It's about her. She likes the attention. You're just the fool willing to give it to her.
 
V

VOOK

We don't know why he keeps buying PAL, either.
I read this as 'so I ate her out'. Was expecting something more fishy.
 
O

Onemic

Member
Honestly even if the op wasn't delusional and the girl wasn't a waitress just doing her job, she has a damn bf. Leave her be.
 
F

FyreWulff

Member
loosus said:
I had the alleged-rapist thing happen once, too. It was at a video store, though. All I can say is this: if there is any decent chance that you might need to see a person again, don't ask them out unless you are pretty fucking sure they won't react like shitheads.

Oh, and coworkers are out of the question from the get-go. TRUST ME; DON'T DO IT. After I split up with a coworker and got another girlfriend, having to tell that girlfriend about my past with my coworker was...bad. Just really bad. It was SUCH a relief when that coworker got another job somewhere else.
Click to expand...

Hence the old saying of don't fish off the company docks. It's just gonna be awkward for both people.

To OP: she said no. Move on. You clearly have the courage part down pat so don't focus of getting that one person while a bunch of other great people pass you by.
 
S

SMT

this show is not Breaking Bad why is it not Breaking Bad? it should be Breaking Bad dammit Breaking Bad
Op, don't let this thread go to waste; go out and find other hot girls, hit on them, ask for their numbers, and report back.
 
S

Socreges

Banned
FortunateSon, don't listen to these fools. These dozens of fools telling you that she's just trying to play you for tips and that she's friendly with you because you, and you alone, are probably putting her unborn children through college and potentially masters programs if she can keep this up..... don't listen to them. She clearly wants you. That whole "I have a boyfriend" thing? Classic Hard To Get Tactics. She just wants to make sure that you really do like her. Tip her more. You've got to demonstrate that you mean business. And be patient. Every so often slip her a subtle note that hints at your intentions, but doesn't ruin the game. It's all just a game. Remember that. She's playing it. But you're winning.
 
C

Cloudy

Banned
Some girls like having their egos stroked. She will want to be around you even after the rejection just you to see how you react and bask in your misery. It's like a drug to them lol

PS: Forget about her now. No girl would ever flat out say "no" to anyone she had even a tiny bit of interest in. Forget all the bullshit about signs or "hard to get" or whatever.

If a girl you liked even a little asked you out, you wouldn't turn it down. It's not any different for girls when guys come at them...
 
T

Takuan

Member
Continue to play it off as though nothing happened. Do not ask her out to anything again. Also, she's making the best out of a potentially awkward situation, so don't slight her for it by giving her less of a tip.

Oh, and stop lying about just wanting to be friends. C'mon, son.
 
Boss Man

Boss Man

Member
Surprise her at work one day with flowers or something from the heart OP, let her know you're serious.


"I have a boyfriend." Is a nice way of letting you down. If she was really interested, even if she did have a boyfriend, she might mention that she sort of has a boyfriend but that they're on a break or something.
 
K

KittenMaster

Member
I can imagine the thread somewhere on the internet from the other perspective.

"So one of my regulars just tried to ask me out. This wasn't the first time that had happened, so I was able to give a quick 'no, I have a boyfriend' and continue working. Bizzaro GAF, my question is: was I being too flirty with him? I try to get along with customers well so they tip better, but maybe I went too far? Also was it a bad idea to tell him that we could still be friends?"
 
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