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[Prez]

I had another thread about quitting FB and texting but that wasn't feasible, I admit.

That thread gave me another idea though (I suggested it there but it was ignored). How about we create a list of small challenges and try do as many as possible? For example:

1. Go to a public place and smile at 5 random people
2. Get to know an acquaintance better by inviting them to go out and do something
3. Say a greeting (hello, good morning...) to 5 strangers in one day
4. Compliment a stranger
5. Ask a stranger for directions
6. etc.

It's different than setting these goals just for yourself since we're in this together and we can share our experiences. I'm sure you can come up with other good challenges, so we can have a list of 30 challenges that we have to complete in 30 days.

Anyone up for this?

 

[Uchip]

Taking up dancing was a big help for me
performing in front of a large crowd is pretty intense lol

 

[Seraphinianus]

start saying "yes" to everything

 

[Prez]

Taking up dancing was a big help for me
performing in front of a large crowd is pretty intense lol

That could be one of the challenges as well: enroll for something you enjoy that's done in group (sports, music, dancing, etc.)

 

[Chinner]

go out and start masturbating at pretty girls. they'll take it as a compliment!

 

[Wario64]

7. Ask 5 random girls for a blowjob

 

[Uchip]

start saying "yes" to everything

How far jim carrey has fallen

 

[Qwomo]

1. Go to a public place and smile at 5 random people

haha

 

[BitchTits]

1. Go to a public place and smile at 5 random people
3. Say a greeting (hello, good morning...) to 5 strangers in one day

The likely reception to these actions will probably reinforce any social anxiety.

 

[Seraphinianus]

How far jim carrey has fallen

i don't get it...

 

[Prez]

haha

Walking by a person and smiling at them isn't considered strange at all, so I don't see why that would be funny.

 

[GalacticAE]

8. Smoke weed everyday

 

[Cubsfan23]

Listen to this for a week or less and I guarantee you will shed most or all of your anxiety

http://www.davishypnosis.com/Ascension_Hypnosis_Blog/?p=1939

have fun

 

[winter]

If the point of this thread is to tackle social anxiety, you may want to try to try taking 5-htp supplements. I used to suffer from debilitating anxiety (including social anxiety) as a teenager until I realized that anxiety is usually a serotonin problem that can be treated easily. Giving yourself goals is noble and great, but I found that things sort of just fell into place once you correct the chemical imbalance in your brain.

 

[Prez]

The likely reception to these actions will probably reinforce any social anxiety.

Not really. While searching on Google I found a forum where they've done this already and it actually helped.

 

[G-Fex]

I had another thread about quitting FB and texting but that wasn't feasible, I admit.

That thread gave me another idea though (I suggested it there but it was ignored). How about we create a list of small challenges and try do as many as possible? For example:

1. Go to a public place and smile at 5 random people
2. Get to know an acquaintance better by inviting them to go out and do something
3. Say a greeting (hello, good morning...) to 5 strangers in one day
4. Compliment a stranger
5. Ask a stranger for directions
6. etc.

It's different than setting these goals just for yourself since we're in this together and we can share our experiences. I'm sure you can come up with other good challenges, so we can have a list of 30 challenges that we have to complete in 30 days.

Anyone up for this?

I'm forced to do these things everyday.

screw this

 

[bggrthnjsus]

8. Smoke weed everyday

that sounds like it will just make things worse

these are actually good goals and if you were seeing a therapist for treatment you'd probably be given different goals...though with a lot more debriefing and talk about them. granted, goals would have to cater to the individual's personal anxieties, but these are a pretty decent start for people w/ social anxiety.

 

[Hydranockz]

Those sound awesome.

I've always wanted to randomly tell people to have a great day on my commute to the office. I haven't... yet.

 

[rmt92]

i don't get it...

 

[xelios]

If I take twice the amount of Klonopin I'm supposed to take I can go out in public and hold my head up and function like a normal human being. I feel attractive, I walk differently (confidently, maybe even sexily). I can interact with strangers and carry a conversation. It changes my entire brain. So when I go out, that's what I usually do. On most days I just don't take it though.

Yeah I'm messed up but been working on it for years. It's obvious it's something chemically wrong at this point.

 

[Phobophile]

The likely reception to these actions will probably reinforce any social anxiety.

Or, you'll realize that 5 people saying "fuck off" doesn't hurt as much as you think it will. Either way, interaction is probably better than none.

 

[Uchip]

One thing most people overlook is taking cold showers
apparently the stress from this is healthy

 

[BamYouHaveAids]

Walking by a person and smiling at them isn't considered strange at all, so I don't see why that would be funny.

That won't actually help you at all. Just start a random conversation with a stranger, saying "I smiled at a few people" will probably lead to a false sense of accomplishment and might make them apprehensive of progressing further.

 

[Prez]

Those sound awesome.

I've always wanted to randomly tell people to have a great day on my commute to the office. I haven't... yet.

That's what this is for, to motivate people to actually do these things by completing a list of challenges. And you can share your experiences, that helps as well.

 

[Jangocube]

Social anxiety sucks balls, but I've learned to deal with it better over the years. Main thing I did to deal with it is to remind yourself that no one really gives a shit about you when you are out in public. Everyone is concerned with themselves.

Also, work on your appearance. If you feel you look good, you are more open to doing things you wouldn't normally do.

 

[Seraphinianus]

Not really. While searching on Google I found a forum where they've done this already and it actually helped.

well, the best way is just to get more involved with the friends and family you have and network to meet others. Sorry, but a lot of this stuff is piecemeal. Like cold water, you just gotta jump in. Longer evenings/nights out are the best. The more you talk to people, the more you see that everyone's kind of screwy, from the poorest/weirdest to the most outwardly normal/successful. I mean, anxiety comes from judging yourself, so seeing other people's strengths and flaws well help you to stop being so tough on/worried about yourself.


otherwise, it's just a process of letting go of hang ups.

 

[Prez]

That won't actually help you at all. Just start a random conversation no matter how awkward.

It's just one of the challenges and it would usually be the first step to start smalltalk with a stranger!

 

[Mononofu]

If the point of this thread is to tackle social anxiety, you may want to try to try taking 5-htp supplements. I used to suffer from debilitating anxiety (including social anxiety) as a teenager until I realized that anxiety is usually a serotonin problem that can be treated easily. Giving yourself goals is noble and great, but I found that things sort of just fell into place once you correct the chemical imbalance in your brain.

What brand of 5-htp do you take?

 

[xelios]

Also, work on your appearance. If you feel you look good, you are more open to doing things you wouldn't normally do.

I feel attractive and that I also have a nice body. I like a lot of things about myself (eyes, teeth/smile etc). But without meds I still go into panic mode outside the house. It's nothing to do with what other people think of me but seems to be more like a self-preservation mechanism kicking in.

Could be worse I guess and I could be one of those people where nothing seems to help.

 

[Prez]

I feel attractive and that I also have a nice body. I like a lot of things about myself (eyes, teeth/smile etc). But without meds I still go into panic mode outside the house.

Yeah, same for me. I get a lot of compliments on my looks and everyone thinks I look like someone who does sports even though I don't. But none of that helps with my anxiety at all.

 

[Hydranockz]

I am not that socially awkward but I do struggle to keep some conversations and other stuff. A preppy dude in the office from some other department and I were in the elevator.

Dude: "You gotta love having elevators here."

Silence.

Me: "Yeah, those stairs are killer, especially when you're tired."

Deathly silence until he leaves.

A real handy trick is to laugh it off. I was pretty mortified but thinking of it as something negative will not help anyone. That was a funny moment for me. It can only get better

 

[Jangocube]

I feel attractive and that I also have a nice body. I like a lot of things about myself (eyes, teeth/smile etc). But without meds I still go into panic mode outside the house. It's nothing to do with what other people think of me but seems to be more like a self-preservation mechanism kicking in.

Could be worse I guess and I could be one of those people where nothing seems to help.

I feel the same for the most part when it comes to my appearance. But as superficial as it sounds, just dressing nicer or getting a haircut actually goes a long way for me. No idea why really.

Do you think you aren't that interesting? I mean, do you not have a whole lot in life that you think others would want to hear about? When I was unemployed and out of school, it increased my anxiety mainly because during social situations I always felt like I had absolutely nothing to contribute outside of a couple jokes.

When all else fails, medication does help. I didn't love the medicines I tried, but they do work to help ease anxiety.

 

[kehs]

There's a SAD thread on here that has tons of great info on it.

 

[xelios]

Do you think you aren't that interesting? I mean, do you not have a whole lot in life that you think others would want to hear about? When I was unemployed and out of school, it increased my anxiety mainly because during social situations I always felt like I had absolutely nothing to contribute outside of a couple jokes.

That could be a part of why I avoid interaction with people in person. For instance I don't enjoy local sports, don't like talking about religion or politics or any of the go to subjects (at least unless I'm on GAF).

Also I am unemployed and out of school, so yeah.

Like I said though when I take Klonopin I'm a completely functional person. Without, it's more like the fight or flight response than being worried I won't have the right thing to say. Like my safety is being threatened, does that make sense?

 

[brianjones]

I feel the same for the most part when it comes to my appearance. But as superficial as it sounds, just dressing nicer or getting a haircut actually goes a long way for me. No idea why really.

Do you think you aren't that interesting? I mean, do you not have a whole lot in life that you think others would want to hear about? When I was unemployed and out of school, it increased my anxiety mainly because during social situations I always felt like I had absolutely nothing to contribute outside of a couple jokes.

i can totally relate

getting in shape and dressing nicer went a long way for me

unfortunately i'm regressing as im back in the jobless/schooless zone. :/ im even starting to get social anxiety about getting a new job

being more interesting is definitely a tough one.. cause it's not something you can just do and have immediate success with.. it's the kind of thing that comes with getting out into the world and doing shit. having stories to tell, etc.

doing something like learning a musical instrument can go a long way i think

 

[Ultima_5]

I got better when I lost weight and realized no body gives a shit. I understand it wont work for everyone, but it's amazing what a bit of excercise for the body. Both physically and mentally.

 

[Archer]

mine involves the occasional public speaking engagement for business. i used to be much better at speaking in front of hundreds of people, though lately - the past couple of years - its hit or miss. the past couple of times i spoke, my mind kept teasing me to just "give up, walk out of the room, who cares what people think..." soooo bad for me. i miss the confidence and sense of humor i used to have when speaking publicly.

and yes, a couple of events soured my confidence over the past couple of years.

 

[Jangocube]

That could be a part of why I avoid interaction with people in person. For instance I don't enjoy local sports, don't like talking about religion or politics or any of the go to subjects (at least unless I'm on GAF).

Also I am unemployed and out of school, so yeah.

Like I said though when I take Klonopin I'm a completely functional person. Without, it's more like the fight or flight response than being worried I won't have the right thing to say. Like my safety is being threatened, does that make sense?

Yeah it does. You suffer from Paranoia too. I'm not saying full blown paranoia, but at least a little. My mother's side has some pyschological disorders, that being one of them. As you age, it only gets worse.

If you haven't already, speaking to someone about it can help. I know that can be expensive, but going only once a month can make a big difference.

unfortunately i'm regressing as im back in the jobless/schooless zone. :/ im even starting to get social anxiety about getting a new job

Yeah, I'm back doing school after a job didn't work out. Anxiety always goes up when you start or think about something new.

 

[Archer]

Anxiety always goes up when you start or think about something new.

very true. one way that i try and "forget" the new things going on in my life is to exercise, like go for a hike every other day for an hour. does a great job.

 

[Kusagari]

Also, work on your appearance. If you feel you look good, you are more open to doing things you wouldn't normally do.

Heh, I wish this worked for me. I feel good about myself when I look at myself in a mirror at home. Then I go out, feel like everybody's staring or judging me, and my confidence goes to shit.

 

[xelios]

If you haven't already, speaking to someone about it can help. I know that can be expensive, but going only once a month can make a big difference.

My boyfriend pays for my individual health insurance (BCBS) and it covers 100% on psychological. So I go 4x / month to my therapist for general counseling and EMDR. Once a month to my psychiatrist. Have been doing this for years, and yeah it has helped.

 

[olore]

If I take twice the amount of Klonopin I'm supposed to take I can go out in public and hold my head up and function like a normal human being. I feel attractive, I walk differently (confidently, maybe even sexily). I can interact with strangers and carry a conversation. It changes my entire brain. So when I go out, that's what I usually do. On most days I just don't take it though.

Yeah I'm messed up but been working on it for years. It's obvious it's something chemically wrong at this point.

I used to be pretty bad but nowadays I`m like you on that drug you take. It`s awesome to be cool, calm and collected in situations where most people try to make themselves as small, insignificant and un-visible as possible.

Training: talk to someone who you do not know. I can talk to anyone; what they are wearing, where they are going, the car they are driving, the phone they are using, the watch they are wearing, hell, talk about the weather, the possibilities are endless. Realize that you can do anything and just do it, simple as that

 

[Shin Kojima]

8. Smoke weed everyday

This does not make me feel like socializing at all.

 

[Tomat]

That could be a part of why I avoid interaction with people in person. For instance I don't enjoy local sports, don't like talking about religion or politics or any of the go to subjects (at least unless I'm on GAF).

Also I am unemployed and out of school, so yeah.

Like I said though when I take Klonopin I'm a completely functional person. Without, it's more like the fight or flight response than being worried I won't have the right thing to say. Like my safety is being threatened, does that make sense?

Fuckin love Klonopin. </addict> (Not really, but it's the only medicine I've taken that makes me feel relaxed. I don't take it anymore. I still have anxiety issues and see my doctor regularly for depression/anxiety. I haven't seen a psychiatrist/therapist before though; considering manning up and doing so.)

 

[Jangocube]

very true. one way that i try and "forget" the new things going on in my life is to exercise, like go for a hike every other day for an hour. does a great job.

Exercising does help. Anything to make you feel better about yourself helps ease anxiety.

Heh, I wish this worked for me. I feel good about myself when I look at myself in a mirror at home. Then I go out, feel like everybody's staring or judging me, and my confidence goes to shit.

I felt that way my entire life up until about a year or two ago, then it just finally clicked. No one, and it's literally almost nobody, cares what you look like out in public. Unless you are dressed like a freak or are wearing clothes that don't obviously fit you, the people will see you, have a brief thought about you, then you will be out of their mind for good.

I mean really, think about how you view people. You don't remember everyone you see unless someone really stands out. Most people are either too busy to care or are too involved with themselves to really care what you look like.

My boyfriend pays for my individual health insurance (BCBS) and it covers 100% on psychological. So I go 4x / month to my therapist for general counseling and EMDR. Once a month to my psychiatrist. Have been doing this for years, and yeah it has helped.

That's great. A lot of people avoid professional help and try to do it on their own which can be fine for some, but if you really feel that anxiety or whatever is holding you back from becoming a better person, you should always try to get help if it seems you can't do it on your own. I refused help for years.

So do you feel paranoid mostly at night? Or is it an all day/every situation type thing?

 

[Undubbed]

I don't have social anxiety so much as I have little desire to socialize. Not sure if that's the same thing. However, I feel that I need to socialize or my life will go more and more down the shitter. But deep down I'd rather I'd be all by myself, but it's impossible to succeed in life that way...as far as I know.

 

[Hydranockz]

I'll never take medication for mental problems. At least not until I a)talk to someone for a year about my life/feelings or b)walk the ends of this earth. I always thought Americans were very quick on the meds before more traditional therapies but that's just my opinion. Whatever works.

 

[xelios]

.

 

[Uchip]

I'll never take medication for mental problems. At least not until I a)talk to someone for a year about my life/feelings or b)walk the ends of this earth. I always thought Americans were very quick on the meds before more traditional therapies but that's just my opinion. Whatever works.

If it prevents suicide or violent behavior medication is absolutely necessary

 

[Hydranockz]

If it prevents suicide or violent behavior medication is absolutely necessary

I just don't think those are things that non-medicinal means aren't capable of addressing.