360pages, I read the first two chapters of the story you posted in the thread and I liked the premise. One thing that I noticed you tend to do a lot is use "no doubt" in a weird way. I don't think it is technically wrong the way you use it, but I think it sounds a little weird and you could probably use other words. For example, when you said, "Despite his eyes being closed, he felt light trying to penetrate his eyelids, it was obvious daylight at the time. He no doubt slept through the night," I think using "must have" or even just "had" instead of "no doubt" makes more sense. Also, I know you haven't gotten around to editing this yet, but the second comma in that quote should probably be a semicolon, obvious should be obviously, and I don't think you need "at the time."