Kind of back to normal. Kind of.
This week was horrible for me emotionally and mentally. It is a terrible place to be in when you realize the only reason you're still here is not because of your will to live, but because you're afraid to die. Even worse when you find yourself weighing your options between physical death and choosing to stay alive while you feel like you're dying inside.
I owe a couple people for pulling me out before I fell into that abyss. My mom and my younger sister;. the two friends who met me for lunch and just let me vent and tried to relate to me. But I know that's a temporary fix. Something has got to change. In my setting, in my thinking, in my social circle and support systems, in...everything. I've bore this weight on my shoulder for so long and I'm just tired. I feel like I'm fighting for my life at this point.
Sorry to get so serious suddenly, but I had to get this out somewhere.
Nothing too special, but I'm just happy I could finally afford one.
