Make the thread please, and don't leave out that you think your blackness played a role. That's important, no matter how many dumb Gaffers try to trivialize those details of our lives. Our racial insecurities don't just spring up out of nowhere one day. Average white person goes through life happy and obliviously color blind; you and I feel compelled to buy something if we linger too long in a store or else feel we might draw suspicions of theft if walking out empty handed.
The metal detector went off as I was leaving a Banana Republic yesterday. Security guard practically
runs over to me. White people staring, had to empty out my entire messenger bad. Sad thing is I had two bags of stuff I'd just paid for.
The bad part wasn't the metal detector going off, and it wasn't even the guard going through my stuff, or that I had two large bags full of purchased items and my receipts (My messenger bag is
tiny, really just big enough to carry my laptop and a large book. So what? I'm going to spend several hundred dollars here and then steal some
socks or some shit?). The worst part
wasn't even the old white people leaving the store at the time this happened and the looks they were giving me, like "there goes another one..."
No, the worst part was the shit going on in my head afterward. The,
yeah, they were giving me that look. Like I'm just another one of those young niggas going into retail stores in Rittenhouse Square trying to palm shit, nevermind I just spent all this damn money. Or shit, maybe I'm just imagining that they''re looking at me that way as an outlet for my own embarrassment. Not every white person thinks every young black male is a potential thief. What the fuck is wrong with me that my mind would even go there? But that one guy sure was staring for more than a few seconds...and why did that guard empty out my entire bag? He should have known there was no possible way I was stealing shit in it when he saw my laptop crammed in it. I know he's just doing his job but, would he have made me go through all this if I was some lily white girl? And why do I care about any of this? I shouldn't give a shit about any of this...
Ended up being the metal buckle of my bag