His stepmutha holla'd unto him, "It was well fo' thee ta gots a hoe, n' I gots a thugged-out daughter whoz ass is sought of every last muthafuckin playa of renown up in tha ghetto. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass."
"I aint yet of a age ta wed," answered tha youth. Then her big-ass booty holla'd unto him, "I declare ta thee, dat it is thy destiny not ta be suited wit a hoe until thou obtain Olwen, tha daughter of Yspaddaden Penkawr." And tha youth blushed, n' tha ludd of tha maiden diffused itself all up in all his wild lil' frame, although dat schmoooove muthafucka had never peeped her muthafuckin ass fo' realz. And his wild lil' daddy inquired of him, "What has come over thee mah son, n' what tha fuck aileth thee?"
"I be a gangsta yo, but y'all knew dat n' mah stepmutha has declared ta me dat I shall never gots a hoe until I obtain Olwen, tha daughter of Yspaddaden Penkawr."
"That is ghon be easy as fuck fo' thee," answered his wild lil' father. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "Arthur is thy cousin. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Go, therefore, unto Arthur, ta cut thy hair, n' ask diz of his ass as a funky-ass boon."