Jamie xxoo said:
I'm probably going to ease off on the highly personal stuff now though, knowing that other forums like opa ages and ******** take things from here and put them elsewhere to discuss.
I wasn't really going to get into all of this until this comment, which I can't just leave be.
Before I say anything, let me be clear: I have all of the respect in the world for you (Jamie) and lexi, and I don't mean any offense by anything I say. Both of you are entitled to your own opinions and feelings obviously, and I'm not trying to come across as saying that you're wrong in your reactions, because at the end of the day the only person who should tell you how to deal with things that concern you is yourself.
THAT SAID...
Who cares? Really? Some people you don't know on a message forum you're not a regular on made some jokes about you. Does it suck? Sure. But in the grand scheme of life, their opinions mean
nothing to you. They're random names that exist on the internet, which is just what you are to them. The moment you step onto the internet and do
anything, you open yourself up to having somebody do that to you. Every day, it happens countless times to countless people for countless reasons. Hell, screw the internet: the moment you walk outside, you're putting yourself out into society where no doubt somebody at some point will find some reason to bring you up as a topic of conversation later.
"Oh man, that guy I met today was FAT! He's like Jabba the Hutt or something!"
"Oh, did you see that black guy dating that white girl - what's up with that?"
"A grown man wearing a video game t-shirt, I mean COME ON!"
"Remember that girl we saw with the butch haircut and baggy jeans on - I bet she is a TOTAL lesbo!"
On and on and on. That's how people work; it's how they've been since there were enough strangers in the world to talk about, and that's how they'll be until the day the human race dies out. When somebody doesn't know you personally, it's easy for them to talk to you as some sort of thing, instead of a human being. Yes, it's terrible, but it's reality. It's happened to you before, countless times, you just weren't around to hear the discussions, just like it's happened countless times to every other person reading this thread, on NeoGAF period, or in existence.
So you're now going to let a few faceless internet users you've never met, and probably never will, control your life so much that you're going to change how you act here? Really? You're going to let people who mean
nothing to you have that much of an effect on how you live your daily life? Why would you give people who have absolutely no connection to you that much power over who you are?
Some people on another message forum know you're transgender; well, you are! Do you know why you're now at the point in your life that you now are? Because you did what you need to do
for yourself, no matter what others were going to think about you. You had the strength and courage to not give a damn about anybody who might think you were wrong, and take steps toward being the person you wanted in your heart to be. BE PROUD OF THAT! There are an endless amount of people in this world who never have the courage to walk their own road, to be their own person, to defy what others tell them they should or shouldn't do in order to do what they know and feel is right.
No matter what you think about the words those people on the other forum said about you, they're just words. That's it. It's sad that they found fun in ridiculing you and lexi, but there are far, far worse things that could happen to you. Like it or not, we're still far from living in a society that can accept people for whatever they are. Hell, we still have people who hate the fact that America has a black president, or that people of different races can get married, or that women want the same rights and privileges as men! Wars are still being fought over which God you think is the right one! Even before getting to questions of sexuality and gender, there is still a long list of reasons some people aren't going to like other people in this world.
Just... don't care. It really is that simple. Don't care what some random stranger somewhere is saying about you. Especially on a forum where they tend to be equal opportunity offenders (and thus this isn't an issue of specific anti-TG sentiment). Let them. It doesn't change who you are, it doesn't change the life you're living. You've got far too many things to deal with in your life to let something so insignificant in the overall scheme of thing bother you. If they say "Haha you're a tranny!" then say "yeah, so?". If they make fun of your photo, be proud to now be in the club of 1.3 million other people who have posted photos of themselves on the internet and had the same thing happen. Don't give a shit about what goes on at places you don't frequent, because if you do, it's going to eat you up inside. Don't let some random internet comments control your life so much that you actually change how you act on the places that you
do frequent.
NeoGAF isn't some super secret club - anybody on the internet can read what goes on here. If there are things that are so personal that you don't want the rest of the internet to read them, then you shouldn't want anybody on GAF reading those things as well. Otherwise - FUCK 'EM! Be honest about who you are, and don't give a damn about what anybody else thinks.
And for anybody ready to say "it's easy for you to say that" to me because I wasn't directly involved in all of this, no, I wasn't; but I've had this happen to me before,
countless times, for a variety of other reasons. I've been well known in various circles off and on the internet since I was a teenager, and I've had things said about me that would make this particular event look like kid's stuff. Hell, there's a decent chunk of people here on GAF over in the gaming side that think I'm a total asshat! *laughs* That's how life works, and if I let those things seriously bother me, I'd have slit my wrists years and years ago. But, you know, whatever. If I can't allow myself to be made fun of or mocked, and even have a little fun myself with it sometimes, then I'll kill myself from stress and worry.
Let it go. Let them say whatever they want to say, and don't give it a second though. Worry about things that are actually worth worrying about, and don't compromise yourself because somebody else might not like you. It's far too late for that, and especially for a person in the position of being transgender, you're going to be
seriously fucked if you can't learn to not let the small stuff bother you.
The one other thing I'll say is that the one person I have a serious problem with in all of this is DJ_tet (or whatever his name is), because he showed a stupendous level of douchebaggery. Taking a thread about a serious topic on one message forum and using it to try to gain cool points on another is pretty damn pathetic.