Mega Man's Electric Sheep
Member
Armaggeddon, Godzilla, or Matrix Revolutions are my least favourites. I was dragged to the first two, but I went to Revolutions voluntarily, so that one made me the maddest by its crappiness.
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what's the worst movie you've ever seen?
- Thread starter yoshifumi
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Coin Return said:
i have seen all van dammit's movies ( i know im awesome) and derailed is the worst movie he has done( wait for death isnt out yet)
no retreat no surrender rules though
really, who wouldnt go to bruce lee's grave for advice, i would
also, y did that fat kid "have his reasons" for messing with the black kid?
also it really pondered the question, " is L.A.'s karate better than Seattle's?"
Litigation Manuel
Member
Troy
RevenantKioku
PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS PEINS oh god i am drowning in them
Man, I love Dude, Where's my Car?
While Manos is one of the worst movies I've seen, the one I actually went to the theater and saw was Supernova.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0134983/
Ugh. It hurt.
While Manos is one of the worst movies I've seen, the one I actually went to the theater and saw was Supernova.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0134983/
Ugh. It hurt.
The Room. So unbelievably awful that its one of the most hilarious movies I've ever seen. It's an independent film that plays in Los Angeles a lot. It's moving around from city to city so check it out if comes by (preferably with friends). Screenings are free (at least the times I went) so check this link for dates and location.
Felidae_Khrall
Member
Ninja Squad. I cannot even begin to describe the horror of this movie. But I will anyway.
Ninja's are very hard to identify, which is why they all wear brightly colored outfits, HUGE ASS HEADBANDS with NINJA written on it (usually accompanied with a little picture of a ninja just incase you can't read) and They're all caucasian.
The plot of Billy coming home to a gang controlled town, and setting out to help is family with the thugs has seemingly almost nothing to do with the sub-plot of Billy's Pink Power Ranger of a Ninja master, fighting some crazed guy with a god complex.
I cannot understand why MST3K never did this film. IT would have been their #1 episode. Without a doubt.
*edit* - Check out the guy with the rifle on the first cover. That's Billy. He learned all those ninja skills, just so he could pick up a gun. Way to go billy!
Boogie9IGN
Member
Probably the worst movie ever:
The Magic Snowman
http://imdb.com/title/tt0093473/
The story of a snowman that talks to the boy who built him and helps his family when a fishing drought threatens their livelihood. He later teaches the boy a valuable lesson when he tries to beat the local bully in a skating contest.
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It was sponsored/funded by the UN. Now I see why so many hate the UN, after having seen this movie.
Truly, a unique combination of poor plot, terrible acting and low production values. Roger Moore is the voice of the snowman. Either he had charity-guilt problems or the UN blackmailed him into doing the role. I compare all bad movies to The Magic Snowman yardstick. My friends and I say: "That movie was close to Magic Snowman quality!" That it's IMDB rating is 6.4 and not close to 1.0 is a mystery that will take scientists years to unravel.
The Magic Snowman
http://imdb.com/title/tt0093473/
The story of a snowman that talks to the boy who built him and helps his family when a fishing drought threatens their livelihood. He later teaches the boy a valuable lesson when he tries to beat the local bully in a skating contest.
--------------------------------
It was sponsored/funded by the UN. Now I see why so many hate the UN, after having seen this movie.
Truly, a unique combination of poor plot, terrible acting and low production values. Roger Moore is the voice of the snowman. Either he had charity-guilt problems or the UN blackmailed him into doing the role. I compare all bad movies to The Magic Snowman yardstick. My friends and I say: "That movie was close to Magic Snowman quality!" That it's IMDB rating is 6.4 and not close to 1.0 is a mystery that will take scientists years to unravel.Justin Bailey
------ ------
Men in Black II
D
Deleted member 1235
Unconfirmed Member
Spice World was really not the best either.
I went to that with my friends cousin who I thought was hot.turns out shes gay.
Never get that time, money or woody back.
I went to that with my friends cousin who I thought was hot.turns out shes gay.
Never get that time, money or woody back.
Disco Stu said:
I don't know that it's the worst movie I've ever seen, but it was definitely the most disappointing. Like what was said earlier, naked Nicole is never a bad thing, but damn. I was looking forward to this movie for several years. I'm a Kubric whore, and to find out he dies just a week after submitting his final cut was quite a blow. Then I actually saw the film. Maybe I just "didn't get it", but I "got" all his other flicks. I will give this one a second chance one day, I love the actors and the director, but I'll have to say I was exhausted, bored, and utterly pissed off at the end of this monstrosity.
A.I., while not the best flick ever by any stretch, shits all over Eyes Wide Shut. If Kubrick hadn't worked himself to death on the trash starring Tom and Nicole, AI could have been a GREAT flick. As it stands, it's only above average in my book. I actually like the ending, if only because my mom passed away and I can relate to "wanting one more day."
Boogie9IGN
Member
MASB said:
I cried when I saw it in theaters. I was probably 8 or so too
I'd say it's tied between Terror Moon/Within the rock and Freddy got fingered
I've seen a lot of shitty movies at film festivals, but in terms of stuff released commercially in the US, I'd have to go with Kazaam! and the Power Rangers movie, both of which I had to escort my younger brother to since my parents were too smart to sit through them.
I've seen TONS Of shit....I mean there's tons of shit that you know will be shitty just from looking at the fucking movie poster. I mean c'mon, Kazaam?
But probably the worst "this wasn't supposed to be a fucking terrible movie" movie I've seen was Space Cowboys. It had a great cast and a slightly interesting premise, and it had the most insipid plot and mind-numbing dialogue and retarded ending I could ever imagine. I watched it with my dad, and I think we both wanted to stick a 12-guage in our mouths. It was fucking terrible, and anyone who liked it can spend an eternity in hell being raped by the devil because such bad taste should be a sin of sins. YES YOU HEARD ME I TWAS THAT BAD.
But probably the worst "this wasn't supposed to be a fucking terrible movie" movie I've seen was Space Cowboys. It had a great cast and a slightly interesting premise, and it had the most insipid plot and mind-numbing dialogue and retarded ending I could ever imagine. I watched it with my dad, and I think we both wanted to stick a 12-guage in our mouths. It was fucking terrible, and anyone who liked it can spend an eternity in hell being raped by the devil because such bad taste should be a sin of sins. YES YOU HEARD ME I TWAS THAT BAD.
Kumiko Nikaido
Vindication...sweet.
The Blair Witch Project
Megaforce.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084316/
Deeds, Not Words.
edit: A lot of the comments there really do sum up the beauty of this horrible movie:
This is one cool movie. Words can not describe how great this movie is. Barry Bostwick is a bad ass in this flick. I wish I could get a gold jumpsuit myself. Someday I will buy it on DVD and watch all day long. If you see one movie in your life see this one, you will not regreat it.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084316/
Deeds, Not Words.
edit: A lot of the comments there really do sum up the beauty of this horrible movie:
This is one cool movie. Words can not describe how great this movie is. Barry Bostwick is a bad ass in this flick. I wish I could get a gold jumpsuit myself. Someday I will buy it on DVD and watch all day long. If you see one movie in your life see this one, you will not regreat it.
Shatter Dead
from amazon.com:
"I'm a die-hard zombie fan," you tell yourself, "I thrive on low budget."
Not this low of a budget.
"Looks like it was handmade in my backyard with a bunch of 'actors' who can't even stand around convincingly? That sounds cool!"
Trust me, you'd think so, but not really.
SHATTER DEAD is a thing of torture for the zombie film fanatic. On one hand, you've got a great idea - something to breathe new life into the genre. On the other hand, this is SO low budget, you'll never get past the first thirty minutes. And if you do, you'll never watch it again.
As you know by now if you've read up on this flick, the zombies in SHATTER DEAD are not menacing, mindless monsters, just second-class citizens who don't stop moving after they die. Lead "actress" Stark Raven is a zombie-hating living human on a quest to get back to her boyfriend whilst shooting (and showering with) zombies along the way. If only it was a better film.
Once she reaches her boyfriend, he's already slashed his wrists and joined the undead (why would anyone attempt suicide if it was well-known you wouldn't die?) - and so she's stuck in a conundrum - one that isn't solved until she straps a pistol to his groin and makes gross, hardcore love to it. Enough to make you buy the movie? Not after you've seen it.
SHATTER DEAD is an incredible idea rendered absolutely unredeemable by poor production, abysmal acting, and indulgent, extraneous scenes like that described above. Sure, we zombie fans love a little useless nudity - demand it, even - but this is just useless. Still, I can't say "don't buy this film," because it has to be seen to be believed and if you've made it this far, I won't be able to change your mind anyway.
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i wouldnt wish watching this film on my worst enemy. SO. FUCKING. BAD.
from amazon.com:
"I'm a die-hard zombie fan," you tell yourself, "I thrive on low budget."
Not this low of a budget.
"Looks like it was handmade in my backyard with a bunch of 'actors' who can't even stand around convincingly? That sounds cool!"
Trust me, you'd think so, but not really.
SHATTER DEAD is a thing of torture for the zombie film fanatic. On one hand, you've got a great idea - something to breathe new life into the genre. On the other hand, this is SO low budget, you'll never get past the first thirty minutes. And if you do, you'll never watch it again.
As you know by now if you've read up on this flick, the zombies in SHATTER DEAD are not menacing, mindless monsters, just second-class citizens who don't stop moving after they die. Lead "actress" Stark Raven is a zombie-hating living human on a quest to get back to her boyfriend whilst shooting (and showering with) zombies along the way. If only it was a better film.
Once she reaches her boyfriend, he's already slashed his wrists and joined the undead (why would anyone attempt suicide if it was well-known you wouldn't die?) - and so she's stuck in a conundrum - one that isn't solved until she straps a pistol to his groin and makes gross, hardcore love to it. Enough to make you buy the movie? Not after you've seen it.
SHATTER DEAD is an incredible idea rendered absolutely unredeemable by poor production, abysmal acting, and indulgent, extraneous scenes like that described above. Sure, we zombie fans love a little useless nudity - demand it, even - but this is just useless. Still, I can't say "don't buy this film," because it has to be seen to be believed and if you've made it this far, I won't be able to change your mind anyway.
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i wouldnt wish watching this film on my worst enemy. SO. FUCKING. BAD.
Team Rancid
Member
Tie
Baron Aloha
A Shining Example
To Wong Foo: Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar BY A FUCKING MILE!!!!
Worst I've seen in a theater: LXG, Lost in Space, Godzilla (1998), and The Chronicles of Riddick.
Terrible stuff I recommend:
Battlefield Earth
Viva Knievel! - horrible, and unintentionally funny, action film starring Evel Knievel as himself. Not yet available on DVD, though.
Terrible stuff I recommend:
Battlefield Earth
Viva Knievel! - horrible, and unintentionally funny, action film starring Evel Knievel as himself. Not yet available on DVD, though.
Phoenix
Member
Leprechaun in the Hood, Manos the Hand of Fate and Black Samauri are contenders, but Turkish Star War is the worst movie you've never seen. There is no conceivable way that any movie you guys pick could be worse than this. I think it cost more to acquire this film than these guys spent making it.
Dagless M.D.
Member
Felidae_Khrall said:
Ninja Squad. I cannot even begin to describe the horror of this movie. But I will anyway.
Ninja's are very hard to identify, which is why they all wear brightly colored outfits, HUGE ASS HEADBANDS with NINJA written on it (usually accompanied with a little picture of a ninja just incase you can't read) and They're all caucasian.
The plot of Billy coming home to a gang controlled town, and setting out to help is family with the thugs has seemingly almost nothing to do with the sub-plot of Billy's Pink Power Ranger of a Ninja master, fighting some crazed guy with a god complex.
I cannot understand why MST3K never did this film. IT would have been their #1 episode. Without a doubt.
*edit* - Check out the guy with the rifle on the first cover. That's Billy. He learned all those ninja skills, just so he could pick up a gun. Way to go billy!
Sweet Jesus, I was just about to post about this. I found it for $2 on DVD while I was at a local videogame shop.
You forgot to mention the amazing plot about Ivan the Red Ninja, who will kill one ninja a month if he does not get to fight the guy in pink on the cover.
So Ivan goes about killing ninjas (ninjas are very easy to find, due to the fact that they dress in primary colours and spend all of their time flailing about their weapons beside park benches) and collecting their all important headbands. Until the guy in pink decides that he wants to fight Ivan. The fight between them lasts about 2min, until the Pink Ninja somehow wins WITHOUT EVER TOUCHING THE OTHER GUY. He then backflips into thinair and a big screen with the offcenter words THE END comes up.
Its truly terrible stuff.
SteveMeister
Hang out with Steve.
Phoenix said:
But you know you enjoyed watching it!
Worst movie I've ever seen is Cabin Boy. It is the only film ever to inspire me to leave the theater in the middle. There are lots of horrible movies I've seen -- but Cabin Boy is the worst.
Spectral Glider
Member
Here's some:
Wing Commander
Driven
Bless the Child
Eye of the Beholder
13th Warrior
Hardware
Scooby Doo
From Hell
Ninth Gate
Wing Commander
Driven
Bless the Child
Eye of the Beholder
13th Warrior
Hardware
Scooby Doo
From Hell
Ninth Gate
Orange County.
What a stupid fucking movie that was... not funny at all, just damned stupid. This one probably pissed me off more than anything I've seen recently, I'm not exactly sure why, I just hated it.
If you like the intentionally bad Jack Frost you should see Uncle Sam: I Want You Dead! because that's just as good if not better. Starring Isaac Hayes it chronicles the journey of a bloodthirsty soldier thought to be killed, but only napalmed beyond recognition, in the first Gulf War and his desire to kill everyone in his former town. It ends with a cannonball hitting a house which constitutes a GIANT explosion that makes absolutely no sense. It's a good one.
What a stupid fucking movie that was... not funny at all, just damned stupid. This one probably pissed me off more than anything I've seen recently, I'm not exactly sure why, I just hated it.
If you like the intentionally bad Jack Frost you should see Uncle Sam: I Want You Dead! because that's just as good if not better. Starring Isaac Hayes it chronicles the journey of a bloodthirsty soldier thought to be killed, but only napalmed beyond recognition, in the first Gulf War and his desire to kill everyone in his former town. It ends with a cannonball hitting a house which constitutes a GIANT explosion that makes absolutely no sense. It's a good one.
DonasaurusRex
Online Ho Champ
Suicide Club and The Perfect Score or whatever, that mtv movie about kids stealing the SAT...oh god
ManDudeChild
Member
sonatinas said:
More questions include:
-What did the breakdancing have to do with anything?
-Why did they speed up the film for those punches during the "final" fight.
-Why was the dad terrified of fighting anyone ever again after getting pwned ONCE
The list goes on
Phoenix
Member
Guys Turkish Star Wars has everything. They start off with some video ripped right from star wars. They splice in their own characters who are wearing football helmets and headphones in a room with other ripped star wars footage playing on the wall behind them. The have stolen music from moonraker, star wars, indiana jones, clash of the titans, and countless others. They've spliced in history channel footage and some titan rocket launches, some footage from an earthquake when the planet was attacked and then when they were doing laser fire and stuff, they apparently used an eraser to draw it onto the film.
Our heros during this film fight alien muppets, people wearing aluminum foil, zombies, mummies, and yes even ninjas. In that respect it is the ultimate adventure film. It has everything
Indeed. I laughed so hard I cried
Our heros during this film fight alien muppets, people wearing aluminum foil, zombies, mummies, and yes even ninjas. In that respect it is the ultimate adventure film. It has everything
Indeed. I laughed so hard I cried
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