Why I'm Making My Husband Miss The Super Bowl

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This is the embarrassingly trivial shit young couples go on about.

If they stay together and have children, she will look back and realize how naive her self important concerns were. There will come a time, when their only free time will be rushing through taking a crap or a shower...

Disgusted with her over inflated self worth, and his willingness to be neutered.
 
"Hey Honey? I'm going to set our anniversary on the 4th of July. You know how someone we know always throws a great party where we gather with all our friends to watch the fireworks but mostly just hang out and enjoy the company? Instead you're just going to come with me to a fancy restaurant. You can just record the NYC fireworks in HD. Watching it the next day is basically the same. No, it won't matter that you will be left out of all water cooler talk the next day! Don't be silly!"

Thank god my girlfriend realizes it's the significance of actions and not dates that matter. We always celebrate Valentines day around 2 weeks later (schedule permitting), and birthdays / anniversaries are almost never on the exact date. I count myself very lucky. You can be romantic on any day! I find it helps to be romantic on more then just 2 days a year.
 
Neither an anniversary nor a sports game are really that important.

Both have contrived sentimental value associated with them.
 
SmokyDave said:
Sounds to me like she whipped his balls off at the start and now shows him the case she keeps them in annually.

I'm glad my missus doesn't feel the need to assert how 'special' she is in this manner.
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Agreed. I'm glad that my wife isn't like this woman. An anniversary is important but my wife wouldn't require that we celebrate it on the same day as the Super Bowl if it meant missing the game. But her mother is the same. Her mother set the example of wanting her husband to be able to enjoy certain things that is important to him. She even makes sure to put on a great Super Bowl party for him, family, and friends if he wants to that particular year.
 
Utako said:
Neither an anniversary nor a sports game are really that important.

Both have contrived sentimental value associated with them.
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Except one have sentimental value that, if given the right perspective, will strengthen the ties to the person you decided to live with for the rest of your life, and the other has sentimental value towards something that doesn't even exist to be loved.

Oh, and the Giants won. The next day, nothing happened. Next season, it wont mean a thing. Wife, still there. Still exists. Husband, still exists, still there. Your life, yep, it's still going on.

But whatever. A divorce is a divorce. There is no point in doing the math.
 
Mr. B Natural said:
Except one have sentimental value that, if given the right perspective, will strengthen the ties to the person you decided to live with for the rest of your life, and the other has sentimental value towards something that doesn't even exist to be loved.

Oh, and the Giants won. The next day, nothing happened. Next season, it wont mean a thing. Wife, still there. Still exists. Husband, still exists, still there. Your life, yep, it's still going on.

But whatever. A divorce is a divorce. There is no point in doing the math.
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Putting some strange sentimental value on the exact specific day you got married and thinking that if you don't do something to celebrate that right then that you'll somehow weaken your marriage is completely deranged. Thinking that if your husband wants to watch a game that's important to him means that's more important than you is completely deranged. Seeking validation against your own stupid fucking insecurities by forcing your mate to conform is completely deranged. You don't strengthen a marriage through forced compromise like this. You hurt it. Their marriage is hurt. No matter how much you dislike football, no matter how silly whatever it is he wanted to do, they have hurt their marriage.

Making an actual compromise, having an amazing dinner and staying out the night before, waking up for a great breakfast and spending the morning maybe cuddling in bed, and then having a fun party during the game strengthens things. No one loses thing. Guess what, you wake up Monday and in this scenario you've still celebrated your anniversary! Your wife is still happy, and in this scenario the husband is happy too. Your life is still going on strong. But there's no point in doing actual math with this. It all comes down to hey it's a silly game in her opinion, and that means it's cool that she gets to be a selfish bitch about it. That's not how a marriage should work.

My wife hates football. She hates sports in general. But she read this and turned to me and said "What a selfish bitch." That says something, I think.
 
RDreamer said:
Putting some strange sentimental value on the exact specific day you got married and thinking that if you don't do something to celebrate that right then that you'll somehow weaken your marriage is completely deranged. Thinking that if your husband wants to watch a game that's important to him means that's more important than you is completely deranged. Seeking validation against your own stupid fucking insecurities by forcing your mate to conform is completely deranged. You don't strengthen a marriage through forced compromise like this. You hurt it. Their marriage is hurt. No matter how much you dislike football, no matter how silly whatever it is he wanted to do, they have hurt their marriage.

Making an actual compromise, having an amazing dinner and staying out the night before, waking up for a great breakfast and spending the morning maybe cuddling in bed, and then having a fun party during the game strengthens things. No one loses thing. Guess what, you wake up Monday and in this scenario you've still celebrated your anniversary! Your wife is still happy, and in this scenario the husband is happy too. Your life is still going on strong. But there's no point in doing actual math with this. It all comes down to hey it's a silly game in her opinion, and that means it's cool that she gets to be a selfish bitch about it. That's not how a marriage should work.

My wife hates football. She hates sports in general. But she read this and turned to me and said "What a selfish bitch." That says something, I think.
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Then she also had to double down and write about how she's got her husband under her thumb =/.
 
Devolution said:
Then she also had to double down and write about how she's got her husband under her thumb =/.
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That's really the biggest thing. She decided after all this, after her husband bent to her whim that she was going to put it online. And it wasn't even an "I have the best husband ever. He's missing the super bowl to celebrate our first anniversary. What a great guy!" It was "I had to make him do this, because I wasn't going to let a super bowl threaten me."

Their marriage is not going to be a happy one.
 
Devolution said:
Then she also had to double down and write about how she's got her husband under her thumb =/.
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That's what bothers me most. It's one thing to do this. It may work for them. But to write about it in such a public way shows that she has little respect for him.
 
I have friends with wives like this..


"Why does he get to have fun when I'm not having fun??!?
I know.. I'll make him miserable! That will make me happy!"




Terrible relationships
 
If the guy really, really loved football. He wouldn't have had his wedding in the beginning of Feburary. Or is a Cheifs fan or something.
 
ChiTownBuffalo said:
If the guy really, really loved football. He wouldn't have had his wedding in the beginning of Feburary. Or is a Cheifs fan or something.
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From the OP:

We knew last year this would be an issue. When we were deciding on wedding date, I suggested February 5 because it wasn't going to be a busy traveling weekend and we both agreed that we wanted a winter wedding. (It would be in Houston, and a sweaty bride in a white dress taking pictures outdoors was not an option.) My husband's immediate response to this date: "But wait, Babe, the next day is the Super Bowl. We need to think about this." Josh has been a freelance photographer for Sports Illustrated and ESPN the Magazine and has actually been on the field for a Super Bowl, so I understood that this was a big deal for him. And yet I wasn't going to let a football game -- even the football game -- get in the way.
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Seems he foresaw the future problems, but she wasn't going to let it get in the way.
 
RDreamer said:
Seems he foresaw the future problems, but she wasn't going to let it get in the way.
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That moment was his test.

He failed.

On the plus side, he's only going to be stuck playing these odious games for 20 years before he snaps and runs off with an impressionable 19 year old.
 
SmokyDave said:
That moment was his test.

He failed.

On the plus side, he's only going to be stuck playing these odious games for 20 years before he snaps and runs off with an impressionable 19 year old.
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lol. Yep. Honestly, I'm a sports nut and my wife knew that before we married. I wouldn't get married on Super Bowl weekend. This guy's actual livelihood is dependent and attached to the hip of sport and he was willing to bend? He asked for it. If I've learned anything in my short 6 years of marriage is that there are things to give in on, to bend, and there are things to stand firm. This was something to stand firm. No, not because it's just a silly game but because this is his passion and if a woman is going to require you give up your passion for a day that could've been any other day, she isn't the right woman.
 
ClovingSteam said:
lol. Yep. Honestly, I'm a sports nut and my wife knew that before we married. I wouldn't get married on Super Bowl weekend. This guy's actual livelihood is dependent and attached to the hip of sport and he was willing to bend? He asked for it. If I've learned anything in my short 6 years of marriage is that there are things to give in on, to bend, and there are things to stand firm. This was something to stand firm. No, not because it's just a silly game but because this is his passion and if a woman is going to require you give up your passion for a day that could've been any other day, she isn't the right woman.
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Same. I spend a lot of time playing video games, she spends a lot of time reading. We give each other time and space to pursue our individual interests but we also manage to spend an awful lot of time together and have an awful lot of fun.

Perhaps it's because our relationships started on mutually respectful terms rather than some sort of confrontational power-play.

I wonder if she wears the leather dress without him having to give up important parts of his life and take her for a meal? I'm guessing 'no'.
 
RDreamer said:
That's really the biggest thing. She decided after all this, after her husband bent to her whim that she was going to put it online. And it wasn't even an "I have the best husband ever. He's missing the super bowl to celebrate our first anniversary. What a great guy!" It was "I had to make him do this, because I wasn't going to let a super bowl threaten me."

Their marriage is not going to be a happy one.
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Yeah if she's threatened by an event that happens once a year for 3 hours she's got problems.



ClovingSteam said:
lol. Yep. Honestly, I'm a sports nut and my wife knew that before we married. I wouldn't get married on Super Bowl weekend. This guy's actual livelihood is dependent and attached to the hip of sport and he was willing to bend? He asked for it. If I've learned anything in my short 6 years of marriage is that there are things to give in on, to bend, and there are things to stand firm. This was something to stand firm. No, not because it's just a silly game but because this is his passion and if a woman is going to require you give up your passion for a day that could've been any other day, she isn't the right woman.
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That's really how I feel about it. You enter into a relationship both parties need to respect the hobbies and interests of the other person. If not you just get a fucked up dynamic where someone is going to feel less than because whatever they find fun is less important. One doesn't even need to like or respect their hobbies but at least respect your S.O. and their wants. If that includes some "me" time, fucking deal. I shouldn't assume this much but I noticed women who really have problems with their husbands/boyfriends interests in video games and sports (not including the guys who actually neglect shit to do these things) often don't have hobbies of their own to do on their down time. I'd be the cruelest boyfriend ever, if I wanted some me time to watch sports or play a game I'd just tell the missus "read a book or something damn."
 
Slavik81 said:
I don't agree that necessarily implies it is meaningful. Or at least, that's not what I'd take 'meaningful' to mean. As I stated there may be infinitely many things that are in total agreement with the universe, but that no human would ever care about.

Hypothetically, you could present something to every intelligent creature that ever existed or that ever will exist and find that none of them care about it, even if it were 'meaningful' in the sense you describe. But then, what is the use of determining if things are meaningful or not? If meaningful things may be useless to the people discovering them, it seems difficult to justify investing time and energy into an activity solely because it discovers meaningful things.

Indeed, you seem to agree with this implicitly in your other statements. You rejected that a fascination with shoelaces is important, but the discovery of intricate details about shoelaces is no different from the discovery of a cure to pancreatic carcinoma from the perspective of being in line with the rules and principles of the universe.

Anyways, good night Opiate. Sorry about piling this stuff on.
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It's no problem! I agree, any elevation of medicine over shoelaces requires specific axioms; but football in particular does not fit this description. That is, one can quite reasonably argue that shoelaces are more important and meaningful than watchign football is.

AZ Greg said:
There is no need for nominalization.

"I've refrained from mentioning it before (As people can obviously offend others unintentionally on occasion), but your vituperation has been incessant and very direct."

Would have gotten the job done much better.
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Thank you for this! I appreciate the correction. This is the sort of post I hope to encourage.
 
WanderingWind said:
Hm. Well, you're certainly entitled to your opinion, but I specifically called you intelligent, and have in fact, responded quite a few times. I did say I was rethinking certain things about you, but that was your ability to discern analogues. Never once said "stupid." I'll assume you missed this due to the fast pace of the thread.

...and sorry. I'm not going to apologize for not being as dispassionate as you. I don't find it a trait to aspire to, personally. But I definitely wasn't angry, or upset. One emotional statement does not a consistent frame of mind make.
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It wasn't an isolated statement, which is why I brought it up, as I mentioned. Here are your last series of posts responding to me in this thread:

you said:
No, it's only a discussion if you're listening. What we have here is people bashing their head against the wall that is your feigned ignorance of the human condition.
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you said:
Opiate, you've said you're confused too many times now. At what point do you wish to seek clarity, rather than the continuous loop of dispensing condescension and apologizing statements you find yourself in?

You've stated you thought the collective GAF as more mature than whatever arbitrary metric you've set. Yet, your actions are hardly more mature - even if more eloquent and verbose - than any of the people you are "surprised" by. It's not maturity that speaks as to the meaning behind the lives led by others you know little to nothing about. It's hubris of the ugliest kind.
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you said:
Your own second question answers your first. How...how do you not see this?
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you said:
You don't, or you wouldn't be here, and wouldn't be a mod. How are you this unaware than you are no different than other human beings? If you have interests outside of scientific progress, why shouldn't anybody else?
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There's extremely little response to the actual content of my argument, and repeated exasperation at how I can't see this and why am I being deliberately obtuse. Further, you suggest I'm not listening, but also complain that I'm asking people to explain too often. You also direct several expletives toward me (I am not especially offended by foul language, but it's indicative here of your tone).

Just stick to the argument. Remain calm. Provide evidence and reason to support your conclusions. Be constructive. That isn't a high bar to set.
 
Eh, My anniversary falls on the same day as this. I dont miss the super bowl and my wife doesnt either. We either celebrate the day before or after. It is what it is.
 
Oh man.

I don't watch football at all, but my wife would never do that do me in a million years.

She likes me.

(edit - omigod what happened in this thread...)
 
Opiate said:
I was legitimately shocked to see how many people in the MLB/NFL/NHL/etc. threads actually felt that sports were meaningful and important activities.

I don't mean you can't enjoy them, mind you; I enjoy baseball personally, for example. I just fully recognize that it is ultimately trivial and silly, no different than a person who enjoys shoe shopping or going to romantic comedy films.

Very few people seemed to agree with that and instead argued that sports are genuinely meaningful. I supposed I thought GAF was above such silliness, but clearly I was wrong. Many GAF members correctly understand that video games are trivial as well, for example, but I suppose there are likely more members who think games are genuinely meaningful than I anticipate, too.
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Yup. I totally agree. How seriously people take sports, and their inability to recognize its pointlessness, is to me one of the most wide-spread examples of obvious cognitive dissonance in civilized society.

All the stress people go through, all the social divisions people take seriously, and the media empire it has created... it's absurd to me.

Like, seeing some drunk people on a metro almost get into a fight because one guy was wearing a cap for a team someone else didn't like. Fucking... what the fuck? I swear, whenever I see people starting shit on the metro when I'm coming back from a night out about sports, and it feels like it happens about half the time, it makes me really want to say something. To make a mini-speech about how idiotic it is and how negatively it is affecting them and their environment in that moment. How obnoxious it is and how I shouldn't have to deal with something so obviously retarded as someone acting out pointless aggression they feel because they recognize some random guy they don't know as an out-group deserving of bullshit based on nothing real.

Usually it ends with the more alpha-male side going "That's alright man, you're cool anyways." and everyone making up. But even that is a really fucking obnoxious end. The younger, bigger dude making a truce because he is in the position of power. And based on what?

So stupid.

FallingEdge said:
Seriously in what way? Playing it? Watching it? Using it as a business?
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It is dumb to take watching it seriously. Taking the social groupings seriously.

Playing it is fun, and it is fun to take seriously as long as everyone is decent to each other.

Taking it seriously as a business is obviously not dumb, but I feel like it can be somewhat manipulative. The media empire bothers me on an instinctive level because of my personal beliefs on the matter, but I'll admit that I don't understand it well enough to really judge it accurately.
 
Opiate said:
On that note, I would also say that it personally hurts me when people compare me to a robot or machine; that doesn't mean you can't say it, of course (it certainly isn't bannable), but I'm a little confused by it. I work very hard to be a good person; I love my friends and family deeply, I run my own charity because I am concerned with helping others, and I'm very passionate about my interests. I do hope that those who have treated me with hostility will consider that I am not a machine, and I am only trying as best I can to be objective, fair, and reasonable in my analysis.
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I know you're not a machine, but you sound like a broken record in this topic, and the way you started the discussion was far from reasonable. You made an ignorant statement (sports/games are trivial and silly, said you are above such things, thought GAF was above that) and ran with it for sake of argument. It derailed the discussion of the topic, and in the end I don't know what information you actually gained from doing it with the way you've been responding.

I wouldn't consider any of the replies "hostile" considering you posted this in a topic involving the Super Bowl on the day of the Super Bowl... on one of the largest gaming forums which also contains a sizeable sports community.
 
Greg said:
I wouldn't consider any of the replies "hostile" considering you posted this in a topic involving the Super Bowl on the day of the Super Bowl... on one of the largest gaming forums which also contains a sizeable sports community.
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That reply in itself, is hostile.

And Opiate is right btw, there's no getting around it, you might not like it but it's hard to empirically disagree.
 
PortTwo said:
That reply in itself, is hostile.

And Opiate is right btw, there's no getting around it, you might not like it but it's hard to empirically disagree.
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Yeah if you agree with his definition which isn't universally accepted... But yeah we can say one philosophical approach is empirically correct, sure... why not?

EDIT: Btw can we all agree that the poor bastard missed a pretty good game at least?
 
How about the fact they (she) scheduled the wedding on the Super Bowl weekend in the first place? "Hey, you know those fun parties you host or go to every year? Not this time. You have to come to our wedding instead. Hope you didn't have to travel far!"
 
Devolution said:
Yeah if she's threatened by an event that happens once a year for 3 hours she's got problems.





That's really how I feel about it. You enter into a relationship both parties need to respect the hobbies and interests of the other person. If not you just get a fucked up dynamic where someone is going to feel less than because whatever they find fun is less important. One doesn't even need to like or respect their hobbies but at least respect your S.O. and their wants. If that includes some "me" time, fucking deal. I shouldn't assume this much but I noticed women who really have problems with their husbands/boyfriends interests in video games and sports (not including the guys who actually neglect shit to do these things) often don't have hobbies of their own to do on their down time. I'd be the cruelest boyfriend ever, if I wanted some me time to watch sports or play a game I'd just tell the missus "read a book or something damn."
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Lol. I'm quite lucky (unlucky?) since my wife is a serious gamer (just bought MW3 from Best Buy after spending $30 on it via redbox) and her mother set an example by respecting and wanting her husband to have his own time too. My wife enjoys shopping, spending time with family, and me offering her alone time isn't an issue at all, I've had to put more effort into joining her in doing things that she enjoys too. I don't understand the mentality of pressuring a SO to give up on his/her passion.
 
Valnen said:
You can DVR the game. You can't DVR the most important person in your life.
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Super Bowl is the biggest event of the year for America, isn't it? He can love his wife all the rest of the year.

adamsappel said:
How about the fact they (she) scheduled the wedding on the Super Bowl weekend in the first place? "Hey, you know those fun parties you host or go to every year? Not this time. You have to come to our wedding instead. Hope you didn't have to travel far!"
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He should arrange something super romantic on an important day for her, and just say each year 'remember the time you blew me off'
 
Valnen said:
You can DVR the game. You can't DVR the most important person in your life.
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She didn't care about what he wanted, she's all about mememe. He's the one that seem to be showing real sacrifice from what's told. Her making sure he gets screwed isn't worth watching it on dvr. I could see if she portrayed herself as a nice lady, but this thing is cold.
 
PortTwo said:
That reply in itself, is hostile.
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As intended.

It's foolish to think there wouldn't be a reaction to his comments, and the replies have been tame considering the platform and audience he delivered them to.

PortTwo said:
And Opiate is right btw, there's no getting around it, you might not like it but it's hard to empirically disagree.
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So his charity, love, friends, family, and interests he's passionate about should seem meaningless, silly, and trivial to me? Got it.
 
Ploid 3.0 said:
She didn't care about what he wanted, she's all about mememe. He's the one that seem to be showing real sacrifice from what's told. Her making sure he gets screwed isn't worth watching it on dvr. I could see if she portrayed herself as a nice lady, but this thing is cold.
Click to expand...

If a guy wants to watch the game more than go out for their first anniversary, he's probably not worth being with.
 
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