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[Fusebox]

Hogwarts for sure. As if I'm gonna end up in a McMagic frat boy castle having deep heat rubbed on my balls by some douche wizard jock named Randy Lightbeer.

 

[Aaron Strife]

What's Ilvermorny's equivalent for American Football?

This is an important question

If you mean what their version of Quidditch is, it's called Quadpot. It's similar except the Quaffle explodes randomly.

 

[CosmicGroinPull]

I'd go to Balamb Garden.

 

[HStallion]

They are very touchy about their wands and especially want you to be sure of the semantics of what is and isn't an assault wand.

 

[NipplesAndToes23]

Yeah, I don't understand why Hogwarts would retain a house whose students will likely end up evil. Like, they should just expel anyone who gets sorted into Slytherin.

Not everyone does case in point Slughorn.

Fuck either school though, I want to go to Uagadu.

 

[Hasphat'sAnts]

Wouldn't it be cool if like, the American Hogwarts used words and names that weren't batshit insane, unlike in England?

 

[Pandora012]

It's not even a choice, I would be in house Wampus. If only because the cat looks cool, and I like cats.

I'd go to Balamb Garden.

Okay. That got a chuckle out of me.

 

[Fusebox]

Fuck either school though, I want to go to Uagadu.

Aguamenti! Aguamenti! Aguamenti!

 

[Hellsing321]

I'd drop out immediately if I got sorted into pukwudgie

But pukwudiges are hardcore

 

[Septimus Prime]

Wouldn't it be cool if like, the American Hogwarts used words and names that weren't batshit insane, unlike in England?

The place is called Ilvermorny. There's not a chance.

 

[Trojita]

Wouldn't it be cool if like, the American Hogwarts used words and names that weren't batshit insane, unlike in England?

 

[Pandora012]

But pukwudiges are hardcore

This would be my second choice house.

 

[Hellsing321]

Wouldn't it be cool if like, the American Hogwarts used words and names that weren't batshit insane, unlike in England?

All the names of houses for Illvermorny are creatures from Native American folklore.

 

[PSqueak]

I do like that Ilvermorny is explicitly stated to be waaaaaay less racist than Hogwarts, so there is that.

 

[brawly]

Ilvermorny.

There's a death like every year at Hogwarts.

They ain't got guns in Hogwarts tho.

 

[Lord Thrappleper The 49th]

I would say Hogwarts but I think they just voted to leave the international wizarding community to regain control of how their school works and to make Hogwarts for the students again. So we're likely to see a massive drop in the magiconomical climate of the school, and no more tri cup wizarding tournaments until they can hash out new portkey deals, which could take years considering the ministry employs incompetant idiots like Dolores Umbridge and Cornelius Fudge, who have since stepped down from office after they realised they could not succesfully lead an all-wizarding world.

 

[Trojita]

I'm pretty sure Voldemort orchestrated Brexit and imperiused half of the voters to vote leave.

 

[Juice]

Are the boys from all 4 households circumcised? What are the health benefits?

 

[PSqueak]

Are the boys from all 4 households circumcised? What are the health benefits?

Access to the Slytherin wand tree's leaves?

 

[Toxi]

I was going to say yes, but then I tested into fucking Pukwudgie and now I'm not so sure...

But pukwudiges are hardcore

That thing is terrifying.

 

[KeyBladerXIII]

If I were to go to a magical school, it'd be for magizoology. Hogwarts has mermaids, a giant squid, invisible skeleton horses, centaurs, unicorns and a bunch of other creatures.

Sounds like Ilvermorny has some ugly goblin things. I need more info on cool magical animals.

 

[Nipo]

lol American education system.

Na mate stick to Hogwarts. Even Durmstrang would be better.

LOL yea who wants to go to Harvard, MIT, or crappy highschools like Phillips Exeter

 

[Pandora012]

I was going to say yes, but then I tested into fucking Pukwudgie and now I'm not so sure...

That thing is terrifying.

What? It has....a sort of....charm to it?

 

[Toxi]

If I were to go to a magical school, it'd be for magizoology. Hogwarts has mermaids, a giant squid, invisible skeleton horses, centaurs, unicorns and a bunch of other creatures.

Sounds like Ilvermorny has some ugly goblin things. I need more info on cool magical animals.

Well the Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them movie is set in the US...

Though it still ain't got shit on Australia. Can you imagine how fucking terrifying Australia's magical wildlife is?

 

[Sotha_Sil]

I keep envisioning wizards armed with Revolutionary War-era muskets and blunderbusses shooting 20 stunning spells at once.

 

[DirtyManos]

Sure? The food there has to be better at least.

This would be my reasoning as well.

Yeah this is gonna have to be my dealbreaker for Hogwarts.

 

[TheYanger]

I got sorted into Puckwudgie on the website. I no longer care about this dumb school. Ravenclaw got my back since this bitch won't let me be a damn eagle. murica.

 

[Foolworm]

They are very touchy about their wands and especially want you to be sure of the semantics of what is and isn't an assault wand.

What about the debate over open/concealed carry?

 

[dmshaposv]

We also clap after every spell.

I spat out my drink, you sob!

 

[zsynqx]

Hogawarts before Harry got there but after Voldermort's original fall.

That way you still get Dumbledore as the Headmaster and aren't fearing for your life every year.

 

[zeemumu]

IIvermorny. Closer to home, grenade football, and less likelihood of magic racists and giant spiders leading an all out assault on my school to kill one person.

 

[Vermillion]

Ilvermorny.

There's a death like every year at Hogwarts.

At the very least there isn't a house of evil racists in Ilvermorny.

See, these are funny, because of the reality of America.

 

[Trojita]

Hogawarts before Harry got there but after Voldermort's original fall.

That way you still get Dumbledore as the Headmaster and aren't fearing for your life every year.

Dumbledore the crazy person?

 

[Loxley]

Ilvermorny, seems like a pretty chill place.

Speaking of Ilvermorny, is there any word on whether or not it will be making an appearance in Fantastic Beasts, since the story takes place in the US?

 

[marrec]

Nah I'm with everyone else, after Brexit I'm staying in the gold ole' US of A

USA USA USA!

 

[zsynqx]

Dumbledore the crazy person?

I guess you are talking about Michael Gambon Dumbledore who just yells and physically assaults people

I want Richard Harris/Book Dumbledore.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2s2tmAdjcA

 

[KeyBladerXIII]

I could've sworn I heard something about them stopping by the school during the movie. I might've misheard though.

 

[Winters_Solace]

I didn't even know Ilvermorny sorting was up on Pottermore. I got Horned Serpent but in Hogwarts im Hufflepuff. Idk if they are similar since the Horned Serpent description is like 2 lines but I thought it sounded Ravenclawy.

Anyway, i'd rather Hogwarts because I live in the UK.

 

[brandonh83]

I don't know enough about Ilvermorny.

Hogwarts is where Harry fucking Potter went and destroyed the dark lord.

Hogwarts, until further notice.

 

[Madness]

Ffs you guys already using 'no-maj' and asking if Ilvermorny better than Hogwarts.

 

[exmachina64]

Ffs you guys already using 'no-maj' and asking if Ilvermorny better than Hogwarts.

.

 

[brandonh83]

Ilvermorny is a better name than Hogwarts which I always found dumb. Before I was into Potter that name alone made me feel like the series wasn't for me.

 

[The Real Abed]

I'd drop out immediately if I got sorted into pukwudgie

I got sorted into Pukwudgie.

But I'm also in Ravenclaw.

 

[brandonh83]

But pukwudiges are hardcore

This is what Sonic would look like if he were banished to hell and became a servant of the devil after being transformed into an imp on bath salts.

 

[KevinCow]

I just did the Ilvermorny sorting and got Wampus, which is good because Wampus is the least crappy of the four houses.

 

[brandonh83]

I just did the Ilvermorny sorting and got Wampus, which is good because Wampus is the least crappy of the four houses.

Wampa + Krampus

 

[umop_3pisdn]

The one that as far as we know doesn't have magical fascists.

 

[PushTheButtonMax]

I'm going to need a new book series centered around the school along with Hollywood adaptations before I can make my final decision.

Get on it Rowling.

 

[Rebel Leader]

Lets see:

Didn't teach voldermort.
no giant snakes.




llvermorny hands down

 

[CrazyDiamond]

I live in Massachusetts sooooo, probably the shitty public school where we learn how to take tests about magic more than actually learning about magic.