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[kagamin]

Gotta throw my Vietnamese (heritage) food out there somehow, I love bánh mì sandwiches so much:

 

[ZackieChan]

This usually happens at either fast food, or shit restaurants. There are no privately owned shops around you?

All American food = Subway or similar shit-tier food. Didn't you get the memo?

 

[Zoc]

I raise your lousy sammwiches with:

Smörgåstårta.

Holy shit... this whole time there has been a Swedish sandwich equal to, if not exceeding, American sandwiches in ridiculousness? Now this is a turnabout!

 

[Daniel R]

Smörgåstårta is the shit, but it has to be without the prawns. Loads of cheese and ham instead, and a ham-based filling in between the layers of bread.
And no frickin eggs!

Smörgåstårta means Sandwich cake.
Best had with some cold cider or sparkling white wine.

 

[ZackieChan]

Holy shit... this whole time there has been a Swedish sandwich equal to, if not exceeding, American sandwiches in ridiculousness? Now this is a turnabout!

At least they managed to photograph it while sitting on a rug on the floor. #swedishfoodphotography

 

[SpoonyBard]

I don't really like sandwich cake that much, especially if it has too much processed cheese in it, but it's an interesting idea. And you don't have to use seafood in it, you can use anything you use in real sandwich really.

 

[daviyoung]

Holy shit... this whole time there has been a Swedish sandwich equal to, if not exceeding, American sandwiches in ridiculousness? Now this is a turnabout!

Haha!

Also learning that wooden tables don't exist in USA

 

[Kill Your Masters]

Haha!

Also learning that wooden tables don't exist in USA

When I was in New York City on vacation, I noticed that the Americans lack one extremely important thing for sandwich making.

How can you NOT have this in every home? We had to cut the cheese using knives! Knives! Like savages!

Cutting cheese with a knife on a plastic table as everyone seems to lack wooden tables (I hope its just the tables and not all furniture), now that is really sad.

 

[Alucrid]

Also learning that wooden tables don't exist in USA

What?

 

[daviyoung]

What?

Floor comments

 

[Machine]

When I was in New York City on vacation, I noticed that the Americans lack one extremely important thing for sandwich making.

A fucking osthyvel!

How can you NOT have this in every home? We had to cut the cheese using knives! Knives! Like savages!

I've always used a wire cheese slicer like this:

 

[acheron_xl]

How can you NOT have this in every home? We had to cut the cheese using knives! Knives! Like savages!

I buy all my cheese pre-sliced, like a real American.

 

[kurisu_1974]

Jelly is the fucking absolute worst

Do Americans even jam or marmalade? Of course jelly is the worst, I think everyone can agree on that.

Also very nice on a single or double slice of bread WITH BUTTER

 

[Ledsen]

Do Americans even jam or marmalade? Of course jelly is the worst, I think everyone can agree on that.

Also very nice on a single or double slice of bread WITH BUTTER

And cheese. Butter+cheese+marmelade is godly. Orange marmelade especially.

 

[bigbaldwolf86]

Just the first few pages of this thread have had me laughing with how Americans have reacted to a cheese sandwich.

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

Just the first few pages of this thread have had me laughing with how Americans have reacted to a cheese sandwich.

That looks like it was photographed in an abandoned dentist office.

 

[Greddleok]

Just the first few pages of this thread have had me laughing with how Americans have reacted to a cheese sandwich.

I'm not american and that thing looked like some austere bullshit. Europe isn't the 3rd world, put some damn flare into your cooking.

 

[ZackieChan]

When I was in New York City on vacation, I noticed that the Americans lack one extremely important thing for sandwich making.

A fucking osthyvel!

How can you NOT have this in every home? We had to cut the cheese using knives! Knives! Like savages!

What is the functional difference between cheese cut with that and cheese cut with a knife? Genuinely curious.

Do Americans even jam or marmalade? Of course jelly is the worst, I think everyone can agree on that.

Also very nice on a single or double slice of bread WITH BUTTER

Nope, we only have Welch's grape jelly here in this food wasteland called America.

If only we had the means to transport such delicacies across the great, dragon-filled seas or create them ourselves in this humble yet barren land.

 

[andycapps]

Just the first few pages of this thread have had me laughing with how Americans have reacted to a cheese sandwich.

You mean the piece of bread with cheese on top, aka the Struggwich?

What is the functional difference between cheese cut with that and cheese cut with a knife? Genuinely curious.

You get that certain sense of moral superiority by having a kitchen utensil that's only good for one thing.

 

[ThankYouDaletech]

Europeans seem to have a tough time understanding a basic concept: if it exists in Europe, we have a better version in America.

 

[D-Pad]

Do Americans even jam or marmalade? Of course jelly is the worst, I think everyone can agree on that.

Also very nice on a single or double slice of bread WITH BUTTER

We have that very brand in the store here (in Georgia (usa) at least). It's expensive af for the small amount you get.

And yeah its not that The Sandwich (tm) is repulsive, but like, at least toast the bread so the butter can melt.

 

[Greddleok]

Europeans seem to have a tough time understanding a basic concept: if it exists in Europe, we have a better version in America.

Where's your loch ness monster? You're not going to tell me that big foot is better than old nessie? That'd make you a dirty liar.

 

[Leunam]

Where's your loch ness monster? You're not going to tell me that big foot is better than old nessie? That'd make you a dirty liar.

Lemme tell you all about these Mississippi River monsters.

 

[Veritigo_X]

This thread is still going? Give it up Europe, our sandwiches are better.

 

[jmdajr]

This thread is still going? Give it up Europe, our sandwiches are better.

. And I don't know if we have even talked about Tortas yet.

 

[Yobalt]

You mean the piece of bread with cheese on top, aka the Struggwich?



You get that certain sense of moral superiority by having a kitchen utensil that's only good for one thing.

I use my glorious osthyvel to make really thin cucumber slices.

So TWO uses! Get it right!

 

[Jackben]

And cheese. Butter+cheese+marmelade is godly. Orange marmelade especially.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YVrxFmheSc

 

[Darksol]

I don't side with Americans often, but I'd gladly take American sandwiches over a piece of toast with cheese or a fucking hardboiled egg and easy-squeeze cheese on what looks like a cracker.

 

[ZackieChan]

I use my glorious osthyvel to make really thin cucumber slices.

So TWO uses! Get it right!

You know that we have a tool for that, right? And anyone who doesn't suck can cut really thin cucumber or cheese slices with a knife. That's the true multipurpose tool that eliminates the need for your nonsense cheese slicer.

Edit: the tool I was referring to -

 

[cwmartin]

This thread is still going? Give it up Europe, our sandwiches are better.

But you don't understand. Europeans just know cheese. And they cut it with special little shovels that make it taste better. So much so you don't need to add anything to actually make it a sandwich. You know, things like, ingredients.

 

[Hilbert]

This thread is still going? Give it up Europe, our sandwiches are better.

They are so desperately grasping at straws, that JAM of all things is being trotted out as unusual in America.

 

[jmdajr]

What is this JAM thing you speak of. Can I special order online?

 

[Dennis]

I suspect American jelly of never having seen a fruit.

 

[A Fish Aficionado]

I raise your lousy sammwiches with:

Smörgåstårta.

Is that brains or worms in the middle?
Looks off putting.

 

[Dennis]

Is that brains or worms in the middle?
Looks off putting.

Those are peeled shrimp you heathen.

 

[Keasar]

What is the functional difference between cheese cut with that and cheese cut with a knife? Genuinely curious.

First, you get a perfect slice of cheese every time out of a cheese block. So instead of having to buy pre-sliced cheese which is generally more expensive, you save money on making slices yourself.

My experience with the knife while in the US. was that you would get either these chunks of cheese (which is too much), or you would have to spend time cutting thin slices of cheese over by cutting carefully. So its a time saver in itself.

You use less cheese, for the same taste, so you save more cheese in the end over a longer period of time.

And like Yobalt said, you can slice other things with it as well, cucumber, carrots, chocolate for cake garnish. So many wonderful uses.

Is that brains or worms in the middle?
Looks off putting.

It's shrimp actually.
Quite delicious, though unlike the American sandwich, this is only served on very, very special occasions.

 

[Roberto Larcos]

Europeans seem to have a tough time understanding a basic concept: if it exists in Europe, we have a better version in America.

Wine. Beer. Cider. Champagne. Fuck, anything alcoholic. Pizza. Bread. Cheese. Meat (no, you can't compete with jamón ibérico). Ice cream. Mayonnaise (the Dutch do it best). Chips (all about that steak cut). Cars. Bikes.

Culture.

Are there any questions?

 

[ZackieChan]

First, you get a perfect slice of cheese every time out of a cheese block. So instead of having to buy pre-sliced cheese which is generally more expensive, you save money on making slices yourself.

My experience with the knife while in the US. was that you would get either these chunks of cheese (which is too much), or you would have to spend time cutting thin slices of cheese over by cutting carefully. So its a time saver in itself.

You use less cheese, for the same taste, so you save more cheese in the end over a longer period of time.

And like Yobalt said, you can slice other things with it as well, cucumber, carrots, chocolate for cake garnish. So many wonderful uses.


It's shrimp actually.
Quite delicious, though unlike the American sandwich, this is only served on very, very special occasions.

Get good at cutting bro.

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

First, you get a perfect slice of cheese every time out of a cheese block. So instead of having to buy pre-sliced cheese which is generally more expensive, you save money on making slices yourself.

My experience with the knife while in the US. was that you would get either these chunks of cheese (which is too much), or you would have to spend time cutting thin slices of cheese over by cutting carefully. So its a time saver in itself.

Visit one of our many Bed Bath & Beyonds or Crate and Barrels for your cheese tools.

 

[Keasar]

Get good at cutting bro.

No, Americans start entering the 20th century and get some tools that help proper cheese consumption!

Also switch to the metric system already!

 

[Hilbert]

Wine. Beer. Cider. Champagne. Fuck, anything alcoholic. Pizza. Bread. Cheese. Meat (no, you can't compete with jamón ibérico). Ice cream. Mayonnaise (the Dutch do it best). Chips (all about that steak cut). Cars.

Culture.

Are there any questions?

Hahahahahaha.

Very first point: even the French agree California wine is superior.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judgment_of_Paris_(wine)

Our states compete with entire countries when it comes to wine and beer.

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

No, Americans start entering the 20th century and get some tools that help proper cheese consumption!

Europeans need to enter the 20th century and start Googling these things.

 

[Roberto Larcos]

Hahahahahaha.

Very first point: even the French agree California wine is superior.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judgment_of_Paris_(wine)

Our states compete with entire countries when it comes to wine and beer.

The best wines come from Portugal.

EDIT: America's top-selling wine magazine agrees.

 

[perryfarrell]

American bread sucks.

American cheese sucks as well.

So they have to pile on veggies and condiments and sauces and pickles to make it digestible.

Their deli meats are pretty limited. Like, they have perhaps 10 or 15 types of deli meat, while in Europe you can easily find 30 or more different types of sandwich meat. That said, pastrami or corned beef from a jewish-type deli, or turkey from the cutting board is pretty tasty.

But OP is correct, the single slice of bread with ONLY cheese or ONLY deli meat is definitely weird for them.

 

[Keasar]

Visit one of our many Bed Bath & Beyonds or Crate and Barrels for your cheese tools.

Europeans need to enter the 20th century and start Googling these things.

Next time I'm going to United States, I'm making those two places my first stop.

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

American bread sucks.

American cheese sucks as well.

So they have to pile on veggies and condiments and sauces and pickles to make it digestible.

Their deli meats are pretty limited. Like, they have perhaps 10 or 15 types of deli meat, while in Europe you can easily find 30 or more different types of sandwich meat. That said, pastrami or corned beef from a jewish-type deli, or turkey from the cutting board is pretty tasty.

But OP is correct, the single slice of bread with ONLY cheese or ONLY deli meat is definitely weird for them.

I didn't realize New Jersey was part of Europe.

 

[Kill Your Masters]

Europeans seem to have a tough time understanding a basic concept: if it exists in Europe, we have a better version in America.

So did some american have a glass of piss from some european that told him it was beer? And thats how american beer was invented? Because your beer does probably taste better than piss, although I never tasted piss. But yeah you have a better version of piss, in a bottle.

 

[mrklaw]

Kraft mayo and the like are supposedly pretty bad. I haven't had homemade mayo or mayo made in Europe, but apparently, they can be much better.

GOAT mayo

 

[Hilbert]

So did some american have a glass of piss from some european that told him it was beer? And thats how american beer was invented? Because your beer does probably taste better than piss, although I never tasted piss. But yeah you have a better version of piss, in a bottle.

And the desperation mounts.

 

[Veritigo_X]

So did some american have a glass of piss from some european that told him it was beer? And thats how american beer was invented? Because your beer does probably taste better than piss, although I never tasted piss. But yeah you have a better version of piss, in a bottle.

Jesus dude, don't sound so desperate. Just take the L. You can make your 'European beer is better than American beer' thread if you want but this thread is about sandwiches.