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[peanutbutterlatte]

I think I'll have to really because I'm not having much luck as it is. How do you meet people as somebody above says. Man if I could go back and do Uni again...

Just no opportunity to meet people, and everybody I know through friends is in a long term relationship.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Browsing Reddit one day, and saw a dating related post that made me facepalm. Dude's a 34 year old virgin and a chick was hitting on him at a party, rubbing her boobs against his arm multiple times and shit, and he did nothing. Made tons of bullshit excuses when other posters told him to ask her out. Some people are truly beyond help, smh

Where? I need to read this.

 

[Llyranor]

Pick up a new social hobby/activity, or do some volunteer work at an animal or homeless shelter or hospital.

Browsing Reddit one day, and saw a dating related post that made me facepalm. Dude's a 34 year old virgin and a chick was hitting on him at a party, rubbing her boobs against his arm multiple times and shit, and he did nothing. Made tons of bullshit excuses when other posters told him to ask her out. Some people are truly beyond help, smh

Isn't that just GAF-Man?

 

[ZackieChan]

I think I'll have to really because I'm not having much luck as it is. How do you meet people as somebody above says. Man if I could go back and do Uni again...

Just no opportunity to meet people, and everybody I know through friends is in a long term relationship.

Do you live on the International Space Station or something? There's a million ways to meet people - you're just afraid to do it. You walk anywhere and you can meet people. You can go to places where people go to meet people, like bars or clubs. Or Meetups. Or try online, there's like 10 different popular dating sites/apps. There's more ways to meet people now than ever before. Your posts are the dating equivalent of those "humanity was a disappointment" threads!

 

[Miles Quaritch]

I think I'll have to really because I'm not having much luck as it is. How do you meet people as somebody above says. Man if I could go back and do Uni again...

Just no opportunity to meet people, and everybody I know through friends is in a long term relationship.

Cliché answer, sign up to Tinder and OKC. Use Meetup too? I know there's some issues where people come in couples/groups to those too, but you can still get to know new people and have new social circles open up to you.

 

[KevinCow]

You're thinking way too much and you're very insecure, and insecurity reeks and is the definition of unattractive.

Just go there as calm as you can, don't think about "WHEN DO I KISS HER" and stupid shit like that. Just be relaxed and have fun. You'd know if you two are getting along, and you'll know when it's time to kiss.

No shit I'm insecure. At 27 with basically no experience, I think I have the right to be.

And while it may be obvious to you when to kiss, it's not obvious to me because I'm not great at nonverbal communication.

Maybe you were an expert at dating when you first started, but not everyone is.

 

[ZackieChan]

Browsing Reddit one day, and saw a dating related post that made me facepalm. Dude's a 34 year old virgin and a chick was hitting on him at a party, rubbing her boobs against his arm multiple times and shit, and he did nothing. Made tons of bullshit excuses when other posters told him to ask her out. Some people are truly beyond help, smh

I need to go out to a (decent) bar/club by myself sometime. I just can't find opportunities to meet girls anymore. I'm paying the price for having social anxiety during my uni years. I don't have any good pictures to use on dating sites, and to be honest I feel really uninteresting compared to the girls who have tons of stuff to write about in their bios which is really putting me off. I have a temporary job now so hopefully things might actually get better.

So fix all this stuff. Do interesting things and get photographed while doing it. Kills two birds with one stone - you have your photos and you have things to talk about.

Like resumes, people pad their bios to sound more interesting! Do the same.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

No shit I'm insecure. At 27 with basically no experience, I think I have the right to be.

And while it may be obvious to you when to kiss, it's not obvious to me because I'm not great at nonverbal communication.

Maybe you were an expert at dating when you first started, but not everyone is.

Don't worry about kissing, especially on a first date.

Focus on having fun, being your best self and making a good impression. If it works out and you get closer, you can open to her and let her know that you're good at picking up signals. She won't ditch you if she's really into it, she might actually find it attractive.

 

[gaiages]

I think I'll have to really because I'm not having much luck as it is. How do you meet people as somebody above says. Man if I could go back and do Uni again...

Just no opportunity to meet people, and everybody I know through friends is in a long term relationship.

Well, I'm not one for the bar/club scene (and I'm a bit paranoid as a woman so I don't like going to places like that alone), but I try to meet new people via Meetup and Facebook events. Meetup is specifically to find new people with similar interests to your own, the Facebook events help you get out of the house.

Obviously this is less in a dating light, but it really seems like you have to broaden your social circle. And there's always a chance to meet someone there too, even if it's not explicitly the point.

No shit I'm insecure. At 27 with basically no experience, I think I have the right to be.

And while it may be obvious to you when to kiss, it's not obvious to me because I'm not great at nonverbal communication.

Maybe you were an expert at dating when you first started, but not everyone is.

Stop with the negativity and getting defensive. Yes, we all get it, you're not the most experienced at dating, you're nervous, etc. That's not a reason to frickin' attack someone that was giving you legit advice. You' are overthinking things and need to stop.

Negativity is a terrible look, I suggest you stop showing that off and attempt to be more positive.

 

[ZackieChan]

No shit I'm insecure. At 27 with basically no experience, I think I have the right to be.

And while it may be obvious to you when to kiss, it's not obvious to me because I'm not great at nonverbal communication.

Maybe you were an expert at dating when you first started, but not everyone is.

The point is, if you go into this with ideas about how THIS IS GOING TO BE THE ONE I KISS, at THIS CERTAIN TIME, etc. - you're going to be disappointed. The first date (or the 5th) isn't gonna be perfect. You're not going to do everything perfectly. You'll make mistakes. But you need to keep doing this so that you learn from mistakes.

So take the advice I gave the other guy - make yourself more interesting and attractive to women. Take cool photos of you doing that stuff. Eventually you'll get more comfortable with everything.

I went on three dates with a girl that were awful, just a few years ago. I never made physical contact, I just talked to her like a friend the whole time. I was not confident at all. I made an awkward move to kiss her after the third date and we never spoke again. It was over.

Now I'm not afraid to put my hand on a girl's arm when they say something funny, even in a non-date situation (no more hover hand), or when walking around with a date. I'm funny, I'm confident, I have a ton of interesting stories to tell and pictures to show (my photo sitting next to a live panda usually blows them away). Anyone can do it. I'm just some introverted goofball from South Jersey. But I took the time and made the leap to invest in MYSELF and my own life, not for women but in order to have a more fulfilling life. That is reflected in my attitude when on a date, and it's been great.

You'll get there. I'll recommend reading PUA materials again and filtering out anything you find creepy. It is extremely helpful with self confidence and breaking through that initial fear.

 

[neptunes]

Any of you ever encounter someone that didn't like to initiate texts?

Can that be interpreted as lack of interest

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Any of you ever encounter someone that didn't like to initiate texts?

Can that be interpreted as lack of interest

Isn't that the definition of lack of interest?

If they were interested, they'd initiate conversations through messaging.

 

[neptunes]

Isn't that the definition of lack of interest?

If they were interested, they'd initiate conversations through messaging.

What if they're talkative otherwise

 

[Salamando]

What if they're talkative otherwise

What do you mean "otherwise"? They'll initiate Skype/Facetime conversations? Whenever you see her for lunch every day, you talk endlessly? You only ever meet up for dates, but the conversation is just awesome?

If you want a clear answer, you need a clear scenario. Don't be vague with what's going on. It just wastes time and frustrates everyone.

 

[tass0]

No shit I'm insecure. At 27 with basically no experience, I think I have the right to be.

And while it may be obvious to you when to kiss, it's not obvious to me because I'm not great at nonverbal communication.

Maybe you were an expert at dating when you first started, but not everyone is.

That's my exact point, you need to get out of here with that shit because THIS is your problem.

You have to change your mental outlook to start being a bit more positive about things, especially yourself, and try to warm yourself up to getting into that confident mood a few days before the date. Eat a little bit cleaner, do pushups, get a haircut, and then when it's time for the show, just try to be as relaxed as possible and not think about what might come from it, just enjoy yourself.

I've been there done that with all the self-loathing, negative, thinking I'm going to die a wizard stuff, I'm just telling you what I learned from my own xp.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

What if they're talkative otherwise

Otherwise as in? You might not feel comfortable doing so, but we need some more details.

 

[neptunes]

Otherwise as in? You might not feel comfortable doing so, but we need some more details.

The person is willing to text, but you have to initiate the conversation.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

The person is willing to text, but you have to initiate the conversation.

More than one word responses?

Hmm. Maybe they just aren't good at initiating conversation. They worry you might be busy, they might be disturbing you. It could play into a sense of fear where if you don't reply soon enough, they become anxious and think they said something wrong.

 

[bluethree]

The point is, if you go into this with ideas about how THIS IS GOING TO BE THE ONE I KISS, at THIS CERTAIN TIME, etc. - you're going to be disappointed. The first date (or the 5th) isn't gonna be perfect. You're not going to do everything perfectly. You'll make mistakes. But you need to keep doing this so that you learn from mistakes.

So take the advice I gave the other guy - make yourself more interesting and attractive to women. Take cool photos of you doing that stuff. Eventually you'll get more comfortable with everything.

I went on three dates with a girl that were awful, just a few years ago. I never made physical contact, I just talked to her like a friend the whole time. I was not confident at all. I made an awkward move to kiss her after the third date and we never spoke again. It was over.

Now I'm not afraid to put my hand on a girl's arm when they say something funny, even in a non-date situation (no more hover hand), or when walking around with a date. I'm funny, I'm confident, I have a ton of interesting stories to tell and pictures to show (my photo sitting next to a live panda usually blows them away). Anyone can do it. I'm just some introverted goofball from South Jersey. But I took the time and made the leap to invest in MYSELF and my own life, not for women but in order to have a more fulfilling life. That is reflected in my attitude when on a date, and it's been great.

You'll get there. I'll recommend reading PUA materials again and filtering out anything you find creepy. It is extremely helpful with self confidence and breaking through that initial fear.

I remember one time years ago I tried to kiss a girl less than an hour into meeting her for the first time. She didn't actually let me do it until our 3rd date, but she didn't really care that much that I tried so early. Not to say that you should go so far so soon, but you've *got* to make your intentions known early or else you'll be in the "friend zone" pretty quickly.

Any time I have waited to long to do anything or make a move it's been a disaster. On the flip side, I remember this beautiful older woman right around the time I graduated college, really smart (a visiting research scientist from overseas) who was very flirty and interested, and I never did anything because hey, an older, intelligent woman like this clearly would have no interest in me right? Just like your story, she stopped texting after our third meet (because I didn't do anything).

(On a related note, I find that while, yeah, some girls get "flakey" because they're not interested, the opposite is also true - don't show interest and they'll start thinking you're not interested in them. That's happened to me pretty often over the years).

 

[Vaudeville Villain]

I got a girls #. Not the girl I was talking about 2 days ago, but another gorgeous girl. Pretty excited rn. Now to talk a bit and ask her out.

 

[InfiniteBento]

I got a girls #. Not the girl I was talking about 2 days ago, but another gorgeous girl. Pretty excited rn. Now to talk a bit and ask her out.

Congrats ! Hope it works out.

 

[ZackieChan]

I got a girls #. Not the girl I was talking about 2 days ago, but another gorgeous girl. Pretty excited rn. Now to talk a bit and ask her out.

That's awesome. But let me set up some realistic expectations. Getting a number may not mean anything as far as pursuing things with this girl. She may just ignore you going forward. Happens to me all the time.

However - getting that number is a huge step. It helps you to break down any confidence issues and realize that, more than anything, this is a numbers game.

 

[Vaudeville Villain]

Congrats ! Hope it works out.

Thanks! Me to

That's awesome. But let me set up some realistic expectations. Getting a number may not mean anything as far as pursuing things with this girl. She may just ignore you going forward. Happens to me all the time.

However - getting that number is a huge step. It helps you to break down any confidence issues and realize that, more than anything, this is a numbers game.

Lol, that's true. I hope that isn't the case this time. I've been having a streak of bad luck as of late. Our initial conversation was pretty enjoyable, we texted a little already, so it seems pretty cool so far.

I just need to set up the convo so I can segue into asking her out. That, or I'll just grow some Balls and flat out ask ^-^

 

[ZackieChan]

Thanks! Me to



Lol, that's true. I hope that isn't the case this time. I've been having a streak of bad luck as of late. Our initial conversation was pretty enjoyable, we texted a little already, so it seems pretty cool so far.

I just need to set up the convo so I can segue into asking her out. That, or I'll just grow some Balls and flat out ask ^-^

Great!

Yeah, don't beat around the bush. Just say "hey, I really had fun meeting you the other day. Want to go on a date somewhere this weekend?" Like ripping off a Band-Aid.

 

[KevinCow]

I dunno what to think. I thought it went well. She seemed to enjoy talking with me. I enjoyed talking with her. But we didn't do much besides talk. It didn't feel like a date, it felt like just hanging out with a friend. And then after we were done eating, we started wandering around and couldn't figure out anything else to do. She wanted to go get drinks, but I don't drink, and I said it was okay, I wouldn't mind following along and getting a water or something, but she said she didn't like that idea, so we decided to call it.

She sounded like the liked it and was interested in doing something else some other time. She even started pitching ideas for what we could do next. But there was no physical contact aside from a hug at the end. It remains to be seen if she'll actually respond the next time I text her.

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

 

[Kopite]

Might not mean much to some but last night I asked a girl out in 7 texts. 7! Just last year, I spent months texting a girl I fancied and never aske her out.

 

[Jokab]

I dunno what to think. I thought it went well. She seemed to enjoy talking with me. I enjoyed talking with her. But we didn't do much besides talk. It didn't feel like a date, it felt like just hanging out with a friend. And then after we were done eating, we started wandering around and couldn't figure out anything else to do. She wanted to go get drinks, but I don't drink, and I said it was okay, I wouldn't mind following along and getting a water or something, but she said she didn't like that idea, so we decided to call it.

She sounded like the liked it and was interested in doing something else some other time. She even started pitching ideas for what we could do next. But there was no physical contact aside from a hug at the end. It remains to be seen if she'll actually respond the next time I text her.

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

Just talking on the first date is fine. What matters is that you connected on some level and that you get a second date, the latter being by far the most important part as it shows she's interested.

But come on dude, you're being soooooo negative. Absolutely no one has said that sex on the first date is anywhere close to mandatory, in fact it may even be detrimental to pursuing a serious relationship. You got some great advice here, advice that I got when I was starting out with zero experience, and I'll have to say I did pretty well for myself so far. The fact that you're twisting everyone's words shows that you are terrible at taking advice.

"It remains to be seen if she'll actually respond the next time I text her" stop thinking like this. If she doesn't respond, then who cares? You've known she existed for a grand total of two days, who cares what she thinks. If she doesn't want to go on another date with you she's missing out. There is no reason for you to be that attached to a girl after knowing her for such a short time, it does you no good.

 

[Weckum]

Okay, so I kinda want you guys' input and advice on how to move forward.

First a little backstory: I'm an expat in a country where showing affection in public is not done. Holding hands or hugging in public is pushing it, going further (kissing) can get you in more serious trouble. So right off the bat this makes dating harder. Second, she works for a company that has a curfew. She lives in a building owned by the company and she has to be in before a certain time. If she doesn't, she loses her job.

So yeah, that's two pretty big hurdles when dating.

So now the actual dates: Have been on a date with this girl three times now. Met through Tinder, hit it off (something very rare for me on Tinder). First date were drinks, talked for hours until they closed the bar. Hit it off pretty well I think.

Second date was initiated by her, so I knew it went pretty well. She was planning on going home for two weeks but she wanted to see me before that. Went for fancy dinner and afterwards we went to my room. Kissed and fooled around a bit.

She goes home for two weeks, we text each other almost constantly. She mentions she won't have much time to meet in the next month because of work (irregular schedule). There's only two or three times she has time. She says she wants to see me again, and we set something up for the day after she gets back.

This third date is where I'm hung up on. I invited her to watch a movie at my place, something we talked about for a few times earlier. She however preferred going out for dinner near where she lives. Her curfew was 11pm that day so I'm not sure if that's why she chose this option or that she has her doubts. The date felt very platonic to me especially after we kissed and stuff after our last date. I don't know if this was because it was in public (see the first part of this post) or something else. We hug when we say goodbye and she squeezes me a little bit tighter than is regular for a hug.

After the date we text and I tell her 'I would've loved to kiss you tonight but this country ruins fun stuff like that'. Her reply is 'right?!?!'.

Even after that date we still text each other a lot and there's a lot of flirting and sexual innuendo.

Despite all this I still don't really know where I stand somehow. I don't know if this is my insecurity and I'm being stupid or that it's a real thing.

So my question is: how to continue? I definitely have to initiate next date, that much is clear to me. My plan was to ask her on an overnight desert trip here (she hasn't done that yet and has said a couple of times she wants to do that). Do I simply ask her 'hey, wanna go on a desert trip' or not? Thing is, this is an overnight trip which might be a bit soon since it would only be our fourth date.

Tips? Tricks?

(as you guys may have noticed, I haven't been dating much. Was in a 7 year long relation, which was my first experience since I was awkward as fuck and fat during puberty). After that a year and a half long distance thing. So yeah, I suck at dating, getting cues and all that jazz. Also, still insecure as hell because I was the awkward dude during puberty .This country doesn't make it easier either.)

 

[bluethree]

Are you in Asia by any chance? Sounds similar to the Asian countries I've lived in (Japan and Korea), but the company housing thing makes it sound like China.

I don't know how things go where you live exactly, but in the countries I've lived in there are a number of ways to get privacy. The most obvious would be a love hotel or something (though overnight stays might be out because of the company curfew). People do make out/get sexual in other "private" places you're technically not supposed to (like DVD rooms in Korea or private Karaoke rooms). On a recent date here in Japan I took a girl to a place where I knew we'd have a private booth to ourselves (though she wasn't down for much touching or affection).

Maybe invite her to a daytime date at your place?

 

[Weckum]

Are you in Asia by any chance? Sounds similar to the Asian countries I've lived in (Japan and Korea), but the company housing thing makes it sound like China.

I don't know how things go where you live exactly, but in the countries I've lived in there are a number of ways to get privacy. The most obvious would be a love hotel or something (though overnight stays might be out because of the company curfew). People do make out/get sexual in other "private" places you're technically not supposed to (like DVD rooms in Korea or private Karaoke rooms).

Maybe invite her to a daytime date at your place?

Middle East.

And I live in a hotel so there definitely is privacy there. That's where I invited her to watch a movie, but she opted for dinner.

 

[bluethree]

Ah OK. Makes sense since you mentioned "serious trouble" for kissing in public.

Hotel seems like the best bet then. Four dates in and it seems you've got a flirty/sexual vibe going with her - just come up with a reason for her to come up to your hotel room and go from there.

EDIT - sorry I missed the part where you said you brought her to your place already

 

[n64coder]

She wanted to go get drinks, but I don't drink, and I said it was okay, I wouldn't mind following along and getting a water or something, but she said she didn't like that idea, so we decided to call it.

Congrats for putting yourself out there and having a date. Hope you get another one!

If you don't drink alcohol, could you have just said sure without mentioning that you want water? At the bar, just order your water or soda like it is no big deal.

 

[Weckum]

Ah OK. Makes sense since you mentioned "serious trouble" for kissing in public.

Hotel seems like the best bet then. Four dates in and it seems you've got a flirty/sexual vibe going with her - just come up with a reason for her to come up to your hotel room and go from there.

EDIT - sorry I missed the part where you said you brought her to your place already

Yeah, we went to my room after second date and fooled around for a bit. That's why I was kinda puzzled by the third date as I assumed we'd just continue where we left off.

She seems very keen on seeing me (as I said she wanted to see me before she went home and wanted to see me immediately after she got back) and often initiates texting so I think this is just insecure me overthinking everything, but I'm just not sure.

 

[n64coder]

So my question is: how to continue? I definitely have to initiate next date, that much is clear to me. My plan was to ask her on an overnight desert trip here (she hasn't done that yet and has said a couple of times she wants to do that). Do I simply ask her 'hey, wanna go on a desert trip' or not? Thing is, this is an overnight trip which might be a bit soon since it would only be our fourth date.

Tips? Tricks?

Each person has a different comfort level as to when to initiate intimate relations. I would suggest setting up a regular date where you could get some privacy and if it goes well, then you could go back to your room.

Could you ask your work colleagues or friends for ideas on what they would do since they would be familiar with the country?

Where is she from?

 

[Crv756]

I would in a a DTR talk. I just assume people aren't exclusive unless they explicitly say, so it's not that that's bothering me. I'm uneasy because it seems like he's hiding something, which makes me think it's something he at least thinks is worth hiding. Maybe it's a girlfriend, but maybe it's something else entirely. I just wanted to check my instincts that this behavior wasn't just me reading too much.

This guy seems really weird and like he is hiding something from the weekends.
I would bail out !

 

[Dryk]

It took me a while to realise that I'd ended up reading posts from a year ago when I followed that quote

 

[Weckum]

Each person has a different comfort level as to when to initiate intimate relations. I would suggest setting up a regular date where you could get some privacy and if it goes well, then you could go back to your room.

Could you ask your work colleagues or friends for ideas on what they would do since they would be familiar with the country?

Where is she from?

I've been here for a while now so I know some fun stuff to do. That's not the problem really. I guess I was just kind of thrown off by the fact things didn't progress further after the second date and it kinda felt like I was back at square one.

That's why I'm asking if asking her for an overnight date would be too much too soon.

Also, like I said I tend to overthink EVERYTHING when it comes to dating (stuff I said and did during a date etc).

 

[n64coder]

That's why I'm asking if asking her for an overnight date would be too much too soon.

Personally, I think this would be too forward and too soon.

I didn't have an overnight trip with my wife until 6 months later when we went down to FL. We did fool around somewhere around date #4-5 after New Year Eve when I spent the night. That was almost 2 months after we initially met. Each person is different.

 

[AdventureRacing]

I dunno what to think. I thought it went well. She seemed to enjoy talking with me. I enjoyed talking with her. But we didn't do much besides talk. It didn't feel like a date, it felt like just hanging out with a friend. And then after we were done eating, we started wandering around and couldn't figure out anything else to do. She wanted to go get drinks, but I don't drink, and I said it was okay, I wouldn't mind following along and getting a water or something, but she said she didn't like that idea, so we decided to call it.

She sounded like the liked it and was interested in doing something else some other time. She even started pitching ideas for what we could do next. But there was no physical contact aside from a hug at the end. It remains to be seen if she'll actually respond the next time I text her.

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

That sounds exactly like a first date to me. The whole idea is to get to know each other so just talking is fine, preferable even to me. Not one person here had ever said you should have sex on the first date nor was anyone ridiculing you. Everyone's trying to give you useful advice despite the fact you come back here time and time again acting like a prick and insulting anyone who tries to help. Even when you have a bit of success you still try and insult others and Pre-empetively blame them for your failures.

You've just made some huge progress, you've had your first date in years and by your account it seems like it went well and you actually enjoyed it. That's a huge step forward and you should be proud. Maybe you ought to focus on that and keep moving forward instead of taking 2 steps back and going back to being super negative and attacking others.

You're more than capable of achieving what you want if you just go for it.

 

[True Savior]

I dunno what to think. I thought it went well. She seemed to enjoy talking with me. I enjoyed talking with her. But we didn't do much besides talk. It didn't feel like a date, it felt like just hanging out with a friend. And then after we were done eating, we started wandering around and couldn't figure out anything else to do. She wanted to go get drinks, but I don't drink, and I said it was okay, I wouldn't mind following along and getting a water or something, but she said she didn't like that idea, so we decided to call it.

She sounded like the liked it and was interested in doing something else some other time. She even started pitching ideas for what we could do next. But there was no physical contact aside from a hug at the end. It remains to be seen if she'll actually respond the next time I text her.

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

Did you liked her or what ? If yes , then you are set to go. She seems cool.

The no physical contact is not abnormal.

Also why didnt you drink a soda ?

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

I dunno what to think. I thought it went well. She seemed to enjoy talking with me. I enjoyed talking with her. But we didn't do much besides talk. It didn't feel like a date, it felt like just hanging out with a friend. And then after we were done eating, we started wandering around and couldn't figure out anything else to do. She wanted to go get drinks, but I don't drink, and I said it was okay, I wouldn't mind following along and getting a water or something, but she said she didn't like that idea, so we decided to call it.

She sounded like the liked it and was interested in doing something else some other time. She even started pitching ideas for what we could do next. But there was no physical contact aside from a hug at the end. It remains to be seen if she'll actually respond the next time I text her.

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

Dude, what's the problem exactly? You said you enjoyed it and she seemed to have enjoyed it as well and instead of talking about her or how it went, you spend 80% of your post bring angry and lashing out at people. You did well and sense like you both enjoyed it but all you got from that is a crappy attitude that you think she'll stop texting you and a paragraph berating people who tried to help you by putting words in their mouths. Just calm down and be happy you did well and whether she stops responding or not you had a fun time and you gained more experience since you said you had none.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Others might not say it, but you're acting like a dick, KevinCow. Get that shit in check, people in here have done nothing but be kind and offer all manner of good advice/support and yet almost every other post is you lashing out at some imaginary poster who has said this, that or the other.

The fuck?

 

[gaiages]

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

Wow, okay. Even though no one said that. At all.

I know you're bipolar (now), but shit, you've been nothing but a negative asshole since you've come to the dating threads. You're right, I don't know why you're posting this either, because you ignore/twist everyone's advice in infathomable ways that don't even make sense. You're another grap3man essentially. Don't be another grap3man.

 

[Xun]

Last night was strange to say the least.

I wasn't expecting that at all.

 

[Dryk]

I'm going to echo what the others have said but also point out that I get it. Insecurity sucks, especially when trying to find companionship, but try not to let it get in the way here where people are trying to help you get over it.

Last night was strange to say the least.

I wasn't expecting that at all.

Eggplant?

 

[ZackieChan]

Last night was strange to say the least.

I wasn't expecting that at all.

You're like the third poster to engage in "vague-gaffing" this week. Holy crap, give us something to go on.

I don't know why I'm even responding.

 

[Xun]

Eggplant?

No.

You're like the third poster to engage in "vague-gaffing" this week. Holy crap, give us something to go on.

I don't know why I'm even responding.

It is a bit vague, but I'll elaborate further when I get a chance.

It's nothing too crazy.

 

[ZackieChan]

Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this. I'll probably just be ridiculed for not being SUPER ALPHA MALE and fucking her on the first date, like I was ridiculed for being nervous because I have almost no experience. But whatever.

I understand why you're posting like this, even though I don't think it's appropriate. But your post in the self esteem thread made me sad. It's super important that before you can have a good relationship, you need help with how you feel about yourself. My ex has bipolar disorder, and her therapist helped her immensely with issues like this. I hope that you can see someone about your view of yourself. It is destructive and won't help you in this burgeoning relationship, which sounds like it could have potential!

No.

It is a bit vague, but I'll elaborate further when I get a chance.

It's nothing too crazy.

How are you gonna make a second extremely vague post? Just explain or don't post!

 

[gaiages]

Last night was strange to say the least.

I wasn't expecting that at all.

No.

It is a bit vague, but I'll elaborate further when I get a chance.

It's nothing too crazy.

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

You're like the third poster to engage in "vague-gaffing" this week. Holy crap, give us something to go on.

I don't know why I'm even responding.

That's why I just ignore those posts now. They're just stupid attention grabbers with no substance.