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[Omega Kirby]

How old are you guys? I wouldn't ask to kiss. At the end of the date when you say goodbyes, just try to plant a nice kiss on the lips. If she averts again, then you could ask her if something is wrong or perhaps she thinks of you as a friend, not as a lover?

Yeah I wouldn't want to ask either.

She's 18 and I'm 22

 

[n64coder]

She's 18 and I'm 22

I just realized that she could be from a conservative family that does not believe in premarital relations. Do you know what's her background is? Are you her first boyfriend?

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

Shit. She hasn't replied back to my text. I'm going to wait s few days before I text her and ask how her weekend was. She's been looking for sushi restaurants around the area, and hopefully she says yes. Plus, I've never had sushi, so I dunno.

Goddamn it, I hope I didn't blow it, because it seemed like she was digging me.

 

[Omega Kirby]

I just realized that she could be from a conservative family that does not believe in premarital relations. Do you know what's her background is? Are you her first boyfriend?

Nah her family isn't conservative.

She's had two supposedly

First one didn't work out, second Cheated on her.

I don't know, I don't like to overthink things but this has my mind boggled.

 

[BravesCountry]

Shit. She hasn't replied back to my text. I'm going to wait s few days before I text her and ask how her weekend was. She's been looking for sushi restaurants around the area, and hopefully she says yes. Plus, I've never had sushi, so I dunno.

Goddamn it, I hope I didn't blow it, because it seemed like she was digging me.

I think you have come on too strong in your texts...especially asking twice about dinner. I wouldn't text her back in a few days if she doesn't respond. If I were you I would be going into damage control mode and forget about her for over a week or two then maybe reach out so you've distanced yourself from your overzealousness a bit. If anything she may text you before that but I think if you texted again soon without a response from her first you'd be coming off as desperate.

Also try to avoid all of the complimenting, saying you had a really great time is normal but once you start praising her like you did it makes it seem like you don't think you are on her level which is not the impression you want to give. Even if you think she's out of your league you can't act like she is.

 

[Coda]

I'm torn if I should meet this okc girl at a goth club tonight who threw it out there that she was going but didn't really say she was definitely looking for company, just that she'd be there. I can't read if she's just playing cool or couldn't give a shit if I go or not.

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

I think you have come on too strong in your texts...especially asking twice about dinner. I wouldn't text her back in a few days if she doesn't respond. If I were you I would be going into damage control mode and forget about her for over a week or two then maybe reach out so you've distanced yourself from your overzealousness a bit. If anything she may text you before that but I think if you texted again soon without a response from her first you'd be coming off as desperate.

Also try to avoid all of the complimenting, saying you had a really great time is normal but once you start praising her like you did it makes it seem like you don't think you are on her level which is not the impression you want to give. Even if you think she's out of your league you can't act like she is.

Well, she never initiated text messaging before we physically met, so that's what it's hard. I'm off Friday, and maybe early in the week is too early to text her again, so I could wait until Thursday and ask if she wants to get dinner. Or I could follow your plan and wait a couple weeks.

Why do I fucking do this to myself? I'm great at initiating a convo on tinder, I'm great during the first meet up, but when I start to realize how amazing a girl is, I start to get too clingy with next day texts. Fuck, I'm actually feeling depressed, because I don't want to lose her.

 

[n64coder]

I don't know, I don't like to overthink things but this has my mind boggled.

Hmm, I don't know what to say other than try again.

Why do I fucking do this to myself? I'm great at initiating a convo on tinder, I'm great during the first meet up, but when I start to realize how amazing a girl is, I start to get too clingy with next day texts.

It's ok, we all have made mistakes. I remember one person I went on 3 dates with that I hit off really well (I knew her sister-in-law) but it flamed out because she thought I was too wishy-washy and not assertive enough. Lesson learned.

Keep trying and don't get discouraged.

 

[GK86]

You are getting into your own head, and are trying to skip 20 steps in the process. Slow down, man.

How are you during the first convo and meetup?

 

[BravesCountry]

Well, she never initiated text messaging before we physically met, so that's what it's hard. I'm off Friday, and maybe early in the week is too early to text her again, so I could wait until Thursday and ask if she wants to get dinner. Or I could follow your plan and wait a couple weeks.

Why do I fucking do this to myself? I'm great at initiating a convo on tinder, I'm great during the first meet up, but when I start to realize how amazing a girl is, I start to get too clingy with next day texts. Fuck, I'm actually feeling depressed, because I don't want to lose her.

I have the exact same inclinations when it comes to texting but I have to force myself to control it, it's a fucking struggle sometimes. But don't get hung up, I really doubt your chances are ruined with this girl you just need to pump the brakes a bit, and even if she has lost interest it's easy to think she is special when you first meet someone, just keep learning from experiences and you will meet plenty of women of her caliber if she was interested in you, she isn't unique in that regard. There have been times where it hasn't worked out with a girl and I get extremely hung up on it but that shitty feeling always goes away faster than I thought it would, especially on tinder when someone else you match with catches your eye.

Edit: Also just noticed, normally I would think dinner is fine for a second date but if she is on the fence at all she probably wouldn't want to do dinner, I would suggest something more casual like in a week or two inviting her for a coffee or a drink so she doesn't feel as committed and it doesn't seem as big of a deal. I could be way off on this though so feel free to ask others, that would just be my natural inclination.

 

[gaiages]

So guys how should I proceed here. I think I'm messing up somewhere, might need to do something quick

Been dating this girl for about a month and a half. So far had four dates with her, two going out and two at her place.

We talk a lot, I make her laugh, touch zone is no problem; Can touch in any non sexual place with no negative reaction. Most of the time I can plant a kiss on her cheek. Though I haven't recieved one from her yet.

On the third date I tried to go for a kiss, got rejected but I laughed it off and payed no mind, probably my fault anyways since it wasn't a good place to do it but maybe she just wasn't ready?

Fourth date went swell, got to know more of her childhood and stuff. It was a short date but great, a picnic in a park. Didn't try to kiss her just to not come on too needy incase she was still not comfortable with it. We handholded for the first time, so there was that I guess. I dropped her off, another kiss on her cheek, a giggle from her and here I am.

So, what should I do now? Fifth date be the final chance to get a kiss? Or am I overthinking this and I should just keep going at this pace? Maybe ask her if I can kiss her next time? (I prefer spontaenous but meh)

This is moving kind of slow... maybe too slow.

I'd say next date, try to intiate a real kiss (ya know, lip to lip) again. If she refuses, ask her about it. It's the fifth date after all, you should be able to kiss her at the very least. She may not be thinking of you in a 'romantic' way, or she might have some kinda psychological hangup on kissing (less likely).

How do you deal with a girl that you can only see a few hours a week? Been 'seeing' this girl about 5 times. We don't really text either.

Usually I'd recommend texting to keep up on each other. Why don't you two text much? Why can't you see her much? Seems like without any kind of contact (whether it'd be in person, on the phone, or texting), it seems someone will lost interest quickly.

Shit. She hasn't replied back to my text. I'm going to wait s few days before I text her and ask how her weekend was. She's been looking for sushi restaurants around the area, and hopefully she says yes. Plus, I've never had sushi, so I dunno.

Goddamn it, I hope I didn't blow it, because it seemed like she was digging me.

Next time you go out drinking with a lady, prepare to get an Uber home. I would personally feel uncomfortable if a guy was insisting he drive me home from a bar after he was drinking, 'perfect gentleman' or not. Mainly on a safety front (lots of people drinking think they can drive home just fine and can't).

Well, she never initiated text messaging before we physically met, so that's what it's hard. I'm off Friday, and maybe early in the week is too early to text her again, so I could wait until Thursday and ask if she wants to get dinner. Or I could follow your plan and wait a couple weeks.

Why do I fucking do this to myself? I'm great at initiating a convo on tinder, I'm great during the first meet up, but when I start to realize how amazing a girl is, I start to get too clingy with next day texts. Fuck, I'm actually feeling depressed, because I don't want to lose her.

If she's not initiating any texts, that's not a great sign in the first place. You shouldn't text her again at all, the ball's in her court. It's not difficult to text back an 'okay to the dinner'.

And it's only been one date, you shouldn't get attached to a person like that. It's not good for you on multiple points--It gets you hyped up for something that's more likely to not work out than actually work out, you come off as too strong to someone that barely knows you and can scare them away, and so on.

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

Well, when I first texted her on tinder, I gave her my number. She then turned it around, gave me her number and suggested I text her first. When I phone texted her, I asked her why I should text her first, and she said she likes the men around her take charge.

If it was a bad sign, then I highly doubt she wouldn't have agreed to the drinks with me.

As for the dinner plan, like I said she's new to Florida, and she was asking about any good sushi restaurants.

Hopefully all isn't lost. After we started to talk more and more, she became more comfortable around me, like touching my knee, hand, and arm. I did the same. When we were walking down the street to find a new car, she put her arm around mine while we walked. I've never had a girl on a first date ever do that.

Ive already been on quite a few dates on tinder, a couple I banged, others nothing happened. I usually end up not texting them, and it's them that end up texting me.

And the tipsy while driving was a mistake. I should've let her get an uber ride back to her place, because she lived five minutes away from he date.

 

[MattyG]

So I know I said things were going well, but I'm afraid we've hit a point where more stuff is happening while texting and on Twitter than in real life and that it's just going to stay that way. I've seen her maybe 3 or 4 times in the last 2 weeks because of break and a bunch of other stuff, and now all of the sudden she's acting incredibly flirty on the phone but a little more shy in person. Like, lots of flirty texts and obviously creeping on my profile on Twitter and wanting me to know it, but in person she seems more hesitant to talk to me. I'll see her more this week though, so hopefully I can get a better read on it but... gah, college (attempted) dating sucks and none of this is straightforward at all.

 

[Mobile Suit Gooch]

I don't think that was about you. Nothing but love, man. Tough love

Is that what I've been getting?

 

[BravesCountry]

So I know I said things were going well, but I'm afraid we've hit a point where more stuff is happening while texting and on Twitter than in real life and that it's just going to stay that way. I've seen her maybe 3 or 4 times in the last 2 weeks because of break and a bunch of other stuff, and now all of the sudden she's acting incredibly flirty on the phone but a little more shy in person. Like, lots of flirty texts and obviously creeping on my profile on Twitter and wanting me to know it, but in person she seems more hesitant to talk to me. I'll see her more this week though, so hopefully I can get a better read on it but... gah, college (attempted) dating sucks and none of this is straightforward at all.

College dating is easy mode, it's practically a breeding ground for relationships. Post-college it gets much harder to meet new people, people are generally busier and career focused, etc.

 

[MattyG]

College dating is easy mode, it's practically a breeding ground for relationships. Post-college it gets much harder to meet new people, people are generally busier and career focused, etc.

Yeah, I can see how that would be true actually. I guess I'm just having a tough time getting anything started because I've never done this before. Hopefully next time I actually see her I can get a better feel of the situation.

 

[Coda]

Yeah, I can see how that would be true actually. I guess I'm just having a tough time getting anything started because I've never done this before. Hopefully next time I actually see her I can get a better feel of the situation.

Seems like she's waiting for you to make a move at this point.

 

[MattyG]

Seems like she's waiting for you to make a move at this point.

That's what I'm starting to feel. It's been tough, because she's been going through some personal stuff that made her indecisive when I asked her out so I've been hesitant to try again because I don't want to seem pushy, but I think it's time and she's trying to indicate that.

A move she wants, so a move I will make.

 

[Ray Wonder]

I'm not gonna talk too much shit on y'all. I'm just updating you all that I went on a date w her this evening. It was pretty damn dope. She apologized multiple times for being sick and standing me up, and I kept telling her "it was no big deal and I didn't even think about it like that". Lying my ass off lol. She wants to go out again soon, but that's the same shit she said before she was sick 5 times in a row lol 😅
I slowed down on texting her these last few days, maybe that helped? I dunno.

I had DX suck it gifs I just downloaded but I'm better than that. Lmao

 

[ZackieChan]

So I know I said things were going well, but I'm afraid we've hit a point where more stuff is happening while texting and on Twitter than in real life and that it's just going to stay that way. I've seen her maybe 3 or 4 times in the last 2 weeks because of break and a bunch of other stuff, and now all of the sudden she's acting incredibly flirty on the phone but a little more shy in person. Like, lots of flirty texts and obviously creeping on my profile on Twitter and wanting me to know it, but in person she seems more hesitant to talk to me. I'll see her more this week though, so hopefully I can get a better read on it but... gah, college (attempted) dating sucks and none of this is straightforward at all.

3-4 times in 2 weeks sounds like plenty. You mean dates? Are you two dating?

If not, ask her out.

Is that what I've been getting?

You haven't been getting anything lately.

Spoiler

Yes, that is a double entendre.

I'm not gonna talk too much shit on y'all. I'm just updating you all that I went on a date w her this evening. It was pretty damn dope. She apologized multiple times for being sick and standing me up, and I kept telling her "it was no big deal and I didn't even think about it like that". Lying my ass off lol. She wants to go out again soon, but that's the same shit she said before she was sick 5 times in a row lol 😅
I slowed down on texting her these last few days, maybe that helped? I dunno.

I had DX suck it gifs I just downloaded but I'm better than that. Lmao

Before you start breaking out the " suck it" gifs, what happened on the date? Any loving?

 

[MattyG]

3-4 times in 2 weeks sounds like plenty. You mean dates? Are you two dating?

If not, ask her out.

No, I mean like seen her in class and stuff. This is the girl that you guys got me to ask out a month or so ago and she gave me a "I'd love to eventually" answer which I was told to take as a no, but now she's acting like she's interested. So I guess I've just gotta ask her out... again.

 

[Interface23]

I'm not gonna talk too much shit on y'all. I'm just updating you all that I went on a date w her this evening. It was pretty damn dope. She apologized multiple times for being sick and standing me up, and I kept telling her "it was no big deal and I didn't even think about it like that". Lying my ass off lol. She wants to go out again soon, but that's the same shit she said before she was sick 5 times in a row lol 😅
I slowed down on texting her these last few days, maybe that helped? I dunno.

I had DX suck it gifs I just downloaded but I'm better than that. Lmao

Good job Ray, I for one will eat my crow.

 

[Ray Wonder]

Before you start breaking out the " suck it" gifs, what happened on the date? Any loving?

There was a decent amount of flirty contact. No actual lovin' though 😞 She told me a while ago she has pretty high anxiety, so she really only does anything after she's really comfortable with someone. Told me most of her first kisses have been while hanging out doing something like watching a movie. I'm not upset about it, I'll take it at whatever pace she wants to go.

She never had sushi or sake before so I took her to try it. She absolutely hated the sake for real. Like she thought I was playing a joke on her. Lol. It was fun, we're super goofy, and I like that a lot. I can't be serious about most things and I want someone that can relate to that.

Honestly, without trying to sound like a dick, I don't really care anymore what yinz have to say about the situation. I'm completely happy with it, and that's literally all that matters to me.

Good job Ray, I for one will eat my crow.

I already feel good enough right now. You don't have to eat a crow lol

 

[ZackieChan]

There was a decent amount of flirty contact. No actual lovin' though 😞 She told me a while ago she has pretty high anxiety, so she really only does anything after she's really comfortable with someone. Told me most of her first kisses have been while hanging out doing something like watching a movie. I'm not upset about it, I'll take it at whatever pace she wants to go.

She never had sushi or sake before so I took her to try it. She absolutely hated the sake for real. Like she thought I was playing a joke on her. Lol. It was fun, we're super goofy, and I like that a lot. I can't be serious about most things and I want someone that can relate to that.

Honestly, without trying to sound like a dick, I don't really care anymore what yinz have to say about the situation. I'm completely happy with it, and that's literally all that matters to me.

ok

 

[Ray Wonder]

ok

Aww

If I need help in the future I'll still come back for advice though. You all had the disadvantage of not actually knowing the girl. I've known her for two years, pretty well actually. If it was anyone beside this girl I would have taken all of your advice no questions asked.

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

Aww

If I need help in the future I'll still come back for advice though. You all had the disadvantage of not actually knowing the girl. I've known her for two years, pretty well actually. If it was anyone beside this girl I would have taken all of your advice no questions asked.

ok

 

[Llyranor]

True. No better way than getting to know a girl than 2 years in the friendzone.

 

[Ray Wonder]

True. No better way than getting to know a girl than 2 years in the friendzone.

She had a boyfriend

 

[Kopite]

Usually I'd recommend texting to keep up on each other. Why don't you two text much? Why can't you see her much? Seems like without any kind of contact (whether it'd be in person, on the phone, or texting), it seems someone will lost interest quickly.

She's usually busy with work on weekdays and tells me she's too tired afterwards so we only see each other on weekends.She was also overseas for about two weeks. The less texting part is really because neither of us wants to text that much. I'm tired of the effort I've wasted fruitlessly texting in the past to girls that I never went out with so I'm comfortable with just texting to meet up. I guess I'm also a bit insecure about appearing needy/clingy and it excites me that I've found a girl that actually initiates texting. Maybe I could just send her a " Hi, how was your day?" or something? I'm a little scared that she could lose interest...

 

[Miles Quaritch]

You're killing me Ray.

Llittle pieces of me are literally dying after reading your posts...

 

[ZackieChan]

She's usually busy with work on weekdays and tells me she's too tired afterwards so we only see each other on weekends.She was also overseas for about two weeks. The less texting part is really because neither of us wants to text that much. I'm tired of the effort I've wasted fruitlessly texting in the past to girls that I never went out with so I'm comfortable with just texting to meet up. I guess I'm also a bit insecure about appearing needy/clingy and it excites me that I've found a girl that actually initiates texting. Maybe I could just send her a " Hi, how was your day?" or something? I'm a little scared that she could lose interest...

If she loses interest from you occasionally asking how her day is...she wasn't interested in the first place.

Just don't go balls out like Jason's Ultimatum with the "you're beautiful and all that" compliments.

And Ray, I just dunno.

 

[Ray Wonder]

You're killing me Ray.

Llittle pieces of me are literally dying after reading your posts...

Haha, damn, that bad huh?

What advice do you have for me now? Forget what I posted earlier, I want to hear what you think. 😊 It seems like you want to tell me something.

 

[GK86]

Lol, one date and you want to come here to gloat/not gloat?

Then, you say you don't care what we have to say?

 

[Ray Wonder]

Lol, one date and you want to come here to gloat/not gloat?

Then, you say you don't care what we have to say?

Third date, actually, and I just said I want to hear what you have to say.

I was in a "fuck yall" mood last night because if I would've listened to you in the first place I wouldn't even have had a third date. It cannot be that hard to understand why I would say that. You got in my head enough for me to ask her something I never would/should have, so please forgive my temporary unwillingness to hear your opinions on the situation.

I mean, really, would you have been more happy if you were right? If I came back and said she was sick again, and then you all piled on me saying "I told you so?"

See where I'm coming from?

 

[ZackieChan]

I believe our advice was to let her make the move. But whatever. If you don't like the advice, that's fine. You're still at like 3 dates in a YEAR, so it's not exactly a blowout. We are all waiting to hear what happens next.

 

[Ray Wonder]

I believe our advice was to let her make the move. But whatever. If you don't like the advice, that's fine. You're still at like 3 dates in a YEAR, so it's not exactly a blowout. We are all waiting to hear what happens next.

Your first advice you gave was solid. "our" is pretty misleading, because I had quite a few people telling me to just walk away and date someone else. You even told me "You already struck out" or something along those lines.

3 dates in two months btw lol. Which sounds bad, but one was yesterday so I'm OK with it.

 

[AdventureRacing]

Ray, no one here wants you to fail. I'm not sure who you're trying to gloat to, the whole purpose of this thread is to help people with dating. Also the fact that you finally went on a date with her and slowed down your texting is exactly what everyone here wanted to happen. Maybe now you can actually start dating her instead of being a friend that she catches up with every couple of weeks.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Third date, actually, and I just said I want to hear what you have to say.

I was in a "fuck yall" mood last night because if I would've listened to you in the first place I wouldn't even have had a third date. It cannot be that hard to understand why I would say that. You got in my head enough for me to ask her something I never would/should have, so please forgive my temporary unwillingness to hear your opinions on the situation.

I mean, really, would you have been more happy if you were right? If I came back and said she was sick again, and then you all piled on me saying "I told you so?"

See where I'm coming from?

Not really. We gave you advice because we have seen it happen a million times before. "If" you happen to be the one that slipped through the crack that would make us all happy as fuck that you were successful. That is, if you can be humble and not act like a douchebag.

But if you just wanna come here and say "fuck all yall" and post "suck it" cause we didn't get it right this time then I am not even gonna pretend that I feel happy for you. Or apologize that we got it wrong. When people give advice here they don't do it out of malice regardless of whether or not they are harsh. So frankly the only point you have made is that you handle winning poorly.

Literally no one here enjoys being right when some dude comes back to the thread all heart broken about being lead on or crushed over the situation. To even imply that is laughable, it reflects hella sad man.

 

[Ray Wonder]

Not really. We gave you advice because we have seen it happen a million times before. "If" you happen to be the one that slipped through the crack that would make us all happy as fuck that you were successful. That is, if you can be humble and not act like a douchebag.

But if you just wanna come here and say "fuck all yall" and say "suck it" cause we didn't get it right this time then I am not even gonna pretend that I feel happy for you. Or apologize that we got it wrong. When people give advice here they don't do it out of malice regardless of whether or not they are harsh. So frankly the only point you have made is that you handle winning like a brat despite everyone being on your damn team.

Maybe no one else here will say it but that's all your posts have said to me

That wasn't my intention. Sorry if I came off that way. I'm a person that likes to joke around a lot. My first post last night was meant to be like a "friendly jab" at you all.

 

[isny]

So guys how should I proceed here. I think I'm messing up somewhere, might need to do something quick

Been dating this girl for about a month and a half. So far had four dates with her, two going out and two at her place.

We talk a lot, I make her laugh, touch zone is no problem; Can touch in any non sexual place with no negative reaction. Most of the time I can plant a kiss on her cheek. Though I haven't recieved one from her yet.

On the third date I tried to go for a kiss, got rejected but I laughed it off and payed no mind, probably my fault anyways since it wasn't a good place to do it but maybe she just wasn't ready?

Fourth date went swell, got to know more of her childhood and stuff. It was a short date but great, a picnic in a park. Didn't try to kiss her just to not come on too needy incase she was still not comfortable with it. We handholded for the first time, so there was that I guess. I dropped her off, another kiss on her cheek, a giggle from her and here I am.

So, what should I do now? Fifth date be the final chance to get a kiss? Or am I overthinking this and I should just keep going at this pace? Maybe ask her if I can kiss her next time? (I prefer spontaenous but meh)

I get that she's 18 but this pace seems soooo slow.

I personally don't have the patience for this anymore. How is wanting to kiss her coming off as needy?

Does she even know these are dates? Did you initially ask her out on a date? Or just "ask her out?"

It definitely comes off to me like either A. you both have different expectations about these dates and what you want B. she's not as in to you as you are to her or C. she's just WAY too inexperienced and you have to decide if she's worth the time investment, which it usually isn't, and you really can't decide this unless you've known her for much longer than just a month and a half, especially if you've only seen her five times during this month and a half

My advice is ask her why she rejected your kiss on that third date and if she has a problem with physical contact. Set the matter straight. If she's been flip flopping internally about the whole dating you thing or isn't even really interested in you that way at all. If she's thinking about any of this and hasn't had the guts to tell you, or hasn't even thought of these as dates, she'll come clean and you can bail out.

 

[Llyranor]

I had quite a few people telling me to just walk away and date someone else. You even told me "You already struck out" or something along those lines.

All that advice == let her make the move. It meant stop harassing with texts. If she reaches out, great. If she doesn't, you've already moved on. The point was to not invest more and more of your time and energy into someone who wasn't responsive.

Your gloating is a bit douchey.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

That wasn't my intention. Sorry if I came off that way. I'm a person that likes to joke around a lot. My first post last night was meant to be like a "friendly jab" at you all.

If you did this to people in real life, that is, come ask for dating advice, go back and forth while ignoring what people said and then when you had success doing it your way came back and said "I wanted to say suck it but I'm better than that" how exactly do you think that would go over?

I won't speak for anyone else in the thread but that shit would piss me off.

Separate from everyone else in this thread I don't come here just to make witty one liners and say "give up bro". I give advice because I don't like seeing people fail in a manner that I did nor chase things that I have experience seeing go no where. Whether they take it or not is fine, but I don't rub it in people's faces when I'm right, so I expect to not have it rubbed in my face when I'm wrong.

 

[GK86]

Third date, actually, and I just said I want to hear what you have to say.

I was in a "fuck yall" mood last night because if I would've listened to you in the first place I wouldn't even have had a third date. It cannot be that hard to understand why I would say that. You got in my head enough for me to ask her something I never would/should have, so please forgive my temporary unwillingness to hear your opinions on the situation.

I mean, really, would you have been more happy if you were right? If I came back and said she was sick again, and then you all piled on me saying "I told you so?"

See where I'm coming from?

Third date in two months. Bad ratio.

I went back and looked at the advice given to you. Three posters told you, that you were wasting your time (and one of them joined this group after you kept posting excuses) or just plain bail. Six or seven told you to slow down on the texting and/or that the ball was in her court. So, I don't know where you getting the idea that from.

Look, nobody wants to see you (or anyone else) fail. The only time anyone would be happy with someone's failure, is if that failure is the kick in the butt that poster needed to make them better.

I don't mind posters not listening to the advice of anyone here. That has happened before and will continue to happen in the future. But, trying to gloat? That rubbed me that wrong way. On top of your, "I don't care what you guys say." Go back, you have pages that are almost exclusively people responding to your posts. Don't shit on people here.

Good luck with her, dude. I mean that.

 

[Ray Wonder]

I thought it was OK to joke around like that, honestly. Considering these are some replies I've gotten. Some are jokes, some are real advice. It's whatever though. I'm not going to try and defend myself anymore. I feel like the more I say, the more I'll be the bad guy.

Time to bail, Ray.

Don't linger, just bail.

@Ray Wonder - There aren't enough Michael Jordan gifs around to convey the variety of emotions I feel about your situation. How much longer are you planning on wasting your time for this girl?

The Ray Wonder virus is spreading.
They're taking over the thread.

Personally, I think you're wasting your time.

Romantic comedies don't end with restraining orders.

You won't show anyone.
You won't beat the odds.
It's not fun-- it's mental gymnastics.

The point is that you struck out already. You just refuse to accept it.

 

[Your Entertainer]

I thought it was OK to joke around like that, honestly. Considering these are some replies I've gotten. Some are jokes, some are real advice. It's whatever though. I'm not going to try and defend myself anymore. I feel like the more I say, the more I'll be the bad guy.

Here's my friendly jab - no one cares. It was good advice at the time and they would In a heartbeat give it again. Just stop posting. You came here for advice and you got it.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Haha, damn, that bad huh?

What advice do you have for me now? Forget what I posted earlier, I want to hear what you think. 😊 It seems like you want to tell me something.

I still maintain you're wasting your time. Three dates over the course of two months when you factor in five straight stands up is a very bad ratio.

She threw you a bone when she realised you might be moving on, the status quo will begin again from here. Bailing on dates, etc until you again show signs of moving on.

You like this girl, that's great. She might like you back too and things might work out and I hope they do, but when you look at the facts, it doesn't look particularly great. You should at least consider dating others, if you don't want to bail, that's fine, but what's stopping you from at least exploring other opportunities?

You said you don't want to, but that's the problem. That's why you're letting her treat you the way she is, that's why you're looking at this one date as this big thing when it's anything but. That's why you came here ready to gloat and post suck it gifs. You're in so deep you can't see the just bad things are.

I have to ask you, what if you find someone who is actually into you? Someone who wants to spend time with you? Goes out of their way to meet you and doesn't stand you up five times in a row and only goes on a date when she thinks you might be moving on.

I've been where you are, Ray. I've been hanging on one girl for months, looking at every little thing she did as a sign that she was into me and things were moving forward but they weren't and it took me seeing her out on a date with another guy when she was supposedly consoling a friend to realise she was just fucking with me and liked the attention I paid her.

 

[Polioliolio]

So I went out with a girl I met on tinder last night. She's new to the area, so we went out to a few bars I suggested.

We're talking and laughing, I'm asking the questions the while constantly making eye contact. She has one of the most beautiful blue eyes ive ever seen. They were so piercing!

So she gets more comfortable as we've only sat at the front bars. She's touching my hand, arm, knee, you guys know what I'm talking about with experience.

It's chilly as we are walking to our next destinations. She wraps her arm around mine as we walk.

At the end of the night she thinks I'm drunk and wants to call an uber. I tell her I'm fine to drive, but she wanted to call an uber for herself because I don't know her well enough (she said she's old fashion during pre date text), and it's out of my way. I insist I drive her home, and tell her I'm the perfect gentleman. She agrees, I drive her home, and that was that.

I text her when I get home a little tipsy still saying I had a great time, thought she's pretty with beautiful eyes, great personality, and intelligence. She texts me later in the morning saying "lol thanks. I had a great time too. Great bar suggestions and great convo we had. Tty soon."

I text her back saying if she ran the color run this morning. Then I send another text saying we should get dinner next week. She only responds back to the first text saying she woke up too late and went to the farmers market. Didn't mention anything about the dinner. I text her back with "aww I'm sorry! Well I work today at two. I'll talk to you soon, and we should get dinner next week if you want..."

Hasn't responded yet, and I'll admit, she really doesn't seem to text, and responds late to texts.

So I dunno. This girl is drop dead gorgeous, and got more comfortable around me as the night went on, so I'm hoping this works out. I always tell myself not to get overly invested in a girl after the first meet, but it's hard when she ends up not interested, and it stings for a couple days.

I feel like you've already slightly crossed the line of 'showing too much interest'. I mean it does sound like she was totally into you, but her silence now is a little discomforting.

At this point, I'd leave it in the oven for a couple days. If she texts again but it's just chit chat, reply with chit chat. If nothing happens for a few days, throw out the dinner thing once again. The ball is in her court... and maybe she's just busy, but if she's interested, she'll get back to you. The important thing is that you've expressed your interest clearly, and now the rest is up to her.

 

[gaiages]

I don't really care anymore what yinz have to say about the situation.

lol ok

Aww

If I need help in the future I'll still come back for advice though. You all had the disadvantage of not actually knowing the girl. I've known her for two years, pretty well actually. If it was anyone beside this girl I would have taken all of your advice no questions asked.

Why, since you clearly don't care?

lol

Haha, damn, that bad huh?

What advice do you have for me now? Forget what I posted earlier, I want to hear what you think. �� It seems like you want to tell me something.

heh

I thought it was OK to joke around like that, honestly. Considering these are some replies I've gotten. Some are jokes, some are real advice. It's whatever though. I'm not going to try and defend myself anymore. I feel like the more I say, the more I'll be the bad guy.

Come the fuck on.

Look great. You got a date. Congrats! We'd be happy for your if you weren't being such an asshole about it. I get you wanna go "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS Y'ALL WERE WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG", since you... are doing just that, but shit. Had you not be such a dick about it, maybe we'd care a little more about this success, and maybe even provide some advice to keep the good streak going.

But no, you have to be like this. You're far from the end with troubles with her, imo, because I completely agree with Miles (which is gracious enough to actually give you advice again, bless his GAF soul). But whatever. Good luck.

Oh and only one of those was a joke in all those you quoted.

 

[gaiages]

Sorry for the double post, I wanted to separate these two.

She's usually busy with work on weekdays and tells me she's too tired afterwards so we only see each other on weekends.She was also overseas for about two weeks. The less texting part is really because neither of us wants to text that much. I'm tired of the effort I've wasted fruitlessly texting in the past to girls that I never went out with so I'm comfortable with just texting to meet up. I guess I'm also a bit insecure about appearing needy/clingy and it excites me that I've found a girl that actually initiates texting. Maybe I could just send her a " Hi, how was your day?" or something? I'm a little scared that she could lose interest...

Texting her every once and a while to say what's up is like, the opposite of losing interest. If she feels 'smothered' that you would text her every once and while, or fails to respond because she's 'too busy', then it seems like she's too busy to be in a relationship. Relationships require time and effort to foster, and if she's just 'too tired' for you, then it sounds like she's not interested enough in you to give you a couple hours every other week or so. Or send a text saying hi.

 

[Ray Wonder]

lol ok



Why, since you clearly don't care?

lol



heh



Come the fuck on.

Look great. You got a date. Congrats! We'd be happy for your if you weren't being such an asshole about it. I get you wanna go "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS Y'ALL WERE WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG", since you... are doing just that, but shit. Had you not be such a dick about it, maybe we'd care a little more about this success, and maybe even provide some advice to keep the good streak going.

But no, you have to be like this. You're far from the end with troubles with her, imo, because I completely agree with Miles (which is gracious enough to actually give you advice again, bless his GAF soul). But whatever. Good luck.

Oh and only one of those was a joke in all those you quoted.

I don't know what you want me to say. I apologized already.

This is actually fairly frustrating to me because I absolutely didn't mean it in that way.

I'll just take the advice above and stop posting in here.