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[Spike Spiegel]

haha, the few positive reviews are even funnier.

"...It's also a terrific movie for cat-lovers (we don't get thrown many bones, compared to dog and horse fans), featuring 43 fantastic felines, mostly majestic Oriental breeds. Midnight, a tabby with some pretty uncanny facial expressions, is portrayed by a purebred Egyptian Mau named Cairo. Cairo was doubled by Nile, who likes to sit quietly; and by Scarab, who enjoys running and jumping."

...



...

 

[Goreomedy]

This review is strange: he thinks it's terrible, and he reccommends it!

http://splicedwire.com/04reviews/catwoman.html


"One of the hassles of a four-star rating system for movie reviews is that at first glance it can appear to put an enjoyably bad movie on equal footing with a really good one -- case in point, this week's two big studio releases.

Inventive, original and packed with uncommonly intelligent action, "The Bourne Supremacy" is an example of a great three-star movie -- one that I toyed with giving another half-star, but while it's on the "great" end of "good," it didn't quite cross the threshold into "extraordinary." (I hope that makes some kind of sense.)

But "Catwoman" is a whole different kind of three-star movie -- one so blundering, so badly written, so ripped to shreds by the actors chewing the scenery, so pretentiously self-serious, and yet seemingly aware of its own off-the-charts camp value -- that it is wildly entertaining, but for all the wrong reasons."


and at the end of the review : "So although it confounds me to give any movie three stars specifically for being awful, my rule for this rating is a "solid recommend," and the fact is, there's a great time to be had at "Catwoman" -- just bring lots of popcorn to throw at the screen."

Read this yesterday, and it has convinced me to see it. I wish more reviewers would grade in this manner, as bad films often make for good times at the theater.

 

[Willco]

Read this yesterday, and it has convinced me to see it. I wish more reviewers would grade in this manner, as bad films often make for good times at the theater.

Except as critics their job is to review as objectively as they can and that doesn't mean giving it points because it's funny to mock.

And I don't wish critics review like that, simply because I don't have money to waste MST3K'ing at a theatre. When it hits home video, that's one thing, but not in its theatrical run.

 

[Goreomedy]

Does Bruce have a cameo in this one?

 

[Jill Sandwich]

Does Bruce have a cameo in this one?

Yes

 

[Alucard]

These reviews are absolutely hilarious. I almost want to see this so I can be an obnoxious bastard and point out every stupid thing in the movie. @_@

 

[FoneBone]

13% on Rotten Tomatoes. A few quotes:

"The Showgirls of superhero movies."
-- Robert K. Elder, CHICAGO TRIBUNE

"Seems destined to join Showgirls and its ilk as a fast-starting and even faster-fading theatrical release that could enjoy an afterlife as a midnight movie and video/DVD item where viewers supply alternate dialogue."
-- Kirk Honeycutt, HOLLYWOOD REPORTER

"It's bad enough that not only are careers over, but somebody should be slapped."
-- Walter Chaw, FILM FREAK CENTRAL

"Catwoman has all the appeal of a hairball."
-- Jeffrey Bruner, DES MOINES REGISTER

"Catwoman has nothing on its mind but random movement and the airing of every lipstick shade from Revlon's Fall collection"
-- Jeannette Catsoulis, LAS VEGAS MERCURY

"...makes me long for the quiet dignity of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s performance in "Batman and Robin.""
-- Jeffrey Lyles, GAZETTE (MD)

"When you have Berry in a Catwoman costume and Stone in a catsuit, and you can't even stage a decent catfight, why make a Catwoman movie at all?"
-- Sean Means, SALT LAKE TRIBUNE

"I've never cared much for cats anyway, but this clinches it. Next time I see one, I'm going to kick it into the river."
-- Eric D. Snider, ERICDSNIDER.COM

"Less like a comic-book movie than a feature-length S&M video...Let's just hope Warner Bros. gets this feline spayed to prevent a sequel."
-- Frank Swietek, ONE GUY'S OPINION

"Hate is a strong word, but nowhere near fierce enough to describe the ear-steaming loathing Catwoman deserves."
-- Phil Villarreal, ARIZONA DAILY STAR

"Catwoman looks and feels like something culled together by a committee of greedy and inexperienced first-time producers. And horny 14-year-olds."
-- Scott Weinberg, EFILMCRITIC.COM

"The stench of the litter pan is all over this big-screen $90 million disaster-in-waiting."
-- Peter Travers, ROLLING STONE

"Plays like a Lifetime movie on estrogen overdose, barely held together by a script that should have been tossed out with the kitty litter."
-- David Rooney, VARIETY

http://ae.charlotte.com/entertainment/ui/charlotte/movie.html?id=152759&reviewId=15644&1c

Maybe the cast knew serious efforts would be futile. Or maybe they thought they were making a camp classic, an intentional wink-wink effort to deconstruct a stale genre. If that's the case, "Catwoman" is destined not for a "Mystery Science Theater 3000" fate but for immortality as one of the subtlest, most thorough parodies I've ever seen. If Pitof lets me know he intended the latter, I'll add three stars to the rating below.

http://www.suntimes.com/output/ebert1/wkp-news-catwoman23f.html

The director, whose name is Pitof, was probably issued with two names at birth and would be wise to use the other one on his next project.

As horrible as the costume looked, I hadn't expected the movie to turn out this badly. Wow.

 

[Prospero]

Ebert has the best review so far.

It's worth noting that the film seems to be getting bad reviews in spite of Halle Berry's performance, not because of it.

 

[GG-Duo]

"I've never cared much for cats anyway, but this clinches it. Next time I see one, I'm going to kick it into the river."
-- Eric D. Snider, ERICDSNIDER.COM

haha wtf?

 

[Comfort_Eagle]

"Hate is a strong word, but nowhere near fierce enough to describe the ear-steaming loathing Catwoman deserves."
-- Phil Villarreal, ARIZONA DAILY STAR

Usually i hate Phil's reviews, but this time he seems spot on.

 

[SyNapSe]

"...makes me long for the quiet dignity of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s performance in "Batman and Robin.""
-- Jeffrey Lyles, GAZETTE (MD)

heehee

 

[demon]

I saw a clip of it on that new show The Graham NOrton Effect. I wanted to get up, pull down my pants and take a big dump on the tv. It was SO FUCKING AWFUL. And on another note, does that guy Graham Norton's laugh not make you want to choke him to death? It does me.

 

[Rlan]

The director, whose name is Pitof, was probably issued with two names at birth and would be wise to use the other one on his next project.

Ahahahaha! To bad he's already used his other alias: Kaos, for his other super-shit movie, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

He must be one hell of a con man to somehow get Halley Berry, Antonio Banderes, and Lucy Liu into his movies.

Stay away from the man they call Wych Kaosayananda!

 

[OmniGamer]

I've never cared much for cats anyway, but this clinches it. Next time I see one, I'm going to kick it into the river.

LMBAO

 

[Ninja Scooter]

It's bad enough that not only are careers over, but somebody should be slapped."

LOL! best line ever. That should be on the box to the dvd release.

 

[human5892]

Ahahahaha! To bad he's already used his other alias: Kaos, for his other super-shit movie, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

Ah-HA!

 

[explodet]

Ahahahaha! To bad he's already used his other alias: Kaos, for his other super-shit movie, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

Well then. That explains a LOT.

 

[Trevelyon]

Saw Sharon Stone on Letterman the other night & she looked down right embarrassed and so, so uncomfortable when Dave introduced the clip. Which actually wasn't any Catwoman footage, just this lady with too many cats in her house.

 

[mjq jazz bar]

Ahahahaha! To bad he's already used his other alias: Kaos, for his other super-shit movie, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

He must be one hell of a con man to somehow get Halley Berry, Antonio Banderes, and Lucy Liu into his movies.

Stay away from the man they call Wych Kaosayananda!

I'm pretty sure they're different people. Pitof isn't from Thailand.

 

[Rlan]

Actually, now that I'm looking around for info, it doesn't look like Pitof and Kaos are the same person. A friend of mine [very reliable on movies] has been saying they're the same person. Maybe he read it in a magazine, or got mixed up since everyone puts those two, along with McG, as the 'dodgy directors with nicknames'.

I wouldn't be surprised if they were the same people though

 

[Grizzlyjin]

These reviews are absolutely hilarious. I almost want to see this so I can be an obnoxious bastard and point out every stupid thing in the movie. @_@

Same here, I feel like going in and just acting like a total jerk. Mystery Science Theater style, baby.

 

[OmniGamer]

Joel Siegal from ABC NEWS here in NYC tore it up pretty nicely, though he put most of the blame on the director than Halle Berry since he she was a good actress but none of the actors in the movie did a good job. Quote: "We'll see Gigli 4 before we see Catwoman 2"

 

[Ninja Scooter]

haha, the few positive reviews are even funnier.

"...It's also a terrific movie for cat-lovers (we don't get thrown many bones, compared to dog and horse fans), featuring 43 fantastic felines, mostly majestic Oriental breeds. Midnight, a tabby with some pretty uncanny facial expressions, is portrayed by a purebred Egyptian Mau named Cairo. Cairo was doubled by Nile, who likes to sit quietly; and by Scarab, who enjoys running and jumping.".

THIS JUST IN: Catwoman set to make break box office records on the strength of 40 year old single women alone.

 

[G4life98]

rest in peace catwoman franchise