Vermillion
Banned
Or maybe she's actually looking the guy in the eye (that actually answers most of your points).
Dating-Age |OT3| Positivity, Confidence, and Not Being a "Nice" Guy
- Thread starter soultron
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The whole time? She stared at him the whole time? She didn't look where she was walking, nor was interested at the man that look like he just saw a ghost (who was definitely, 100% in her line of vision), or the man that went in front of her, then behind her? Are you kidding me? Or when they walked up the street together?
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
You mean some stuff in television is FAKED? OUTRAGEOUS.
Nerds with Guns
Banned
If you spent half as much time talking to girls as you do calling bullshit on everything you would be well off right now.
......
I don't even no what this means.
Vermillion
Banned
Have you ever talked to someone while walking before? Or been in a city before? You don't look at everything everyone sees.
Yeah, that's a legit defense I guess. Instead of thinking "wait a minute, maybe this is bullshit?" you jump to that. Great.
Vermillion
Banned
It's not even that - it's that he believes it's not possible to just go up to someone and start talking to them.
Nerds with Guns
Banned
This is a great post that will sadly go ignored.
Etrian Oddity
Member
Perhaps he does, goes hand-in-hand why he has such terrible confidence and social skills.
::edit:: I just say we call Game social betterment, and Pick-up Artistry the sleazy bit. Motion on the floor, yay or nay bitches.
it means you're fucking a chicken with this logic of "pickup is a form of self-improvement" when its not. can you build confidence by taking the shotgun approach to women like they're sheep in a field? no. the only way that that even begins add up is if you're aiming for a particular goal of getting laid all day erryday and even then its not the best way to go about doing that either.
the entire slang, terminology, and end-game of it is not a way to get your shit together lol
and the whole "fuck your opinionz!" is just grade a stuff too
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
What difference does it make? The idea is that sometimes you can go up to people and talk to them and build a connection.
Vermillion
Banned
Yea, to all of it.
Have you? In 10 minutes, I would say that I would have turned my head at least once. I mean, come on. And it's not like it was just some dude shooting a click glance either; motherfucker looks ghastly for like 5 seconds right by her.
Yes, I'm saying THAT dude. That guy in the video never did that. That never happened. It was staged, faked, a lie, a sham, etc. That's not going to happen with that guy. It's just another bullshit faked video to take people's money. That dude never pulls that chick for numerous reasons.
Yeah, like when you say "social skills" like i just made up a term. Mumei made a great post about it earlier that you ignored as well. How about you start there?
Nerds with Guns
Banned
Okay Dy, whatever you say Dy. You disagree with my opinion Dy and you're not going to change mines Dy.
What's the alternative to 'shotgunning'? Choosing one girl and putting all your eggs in that basket? No, that's terrible - I would never recommend that.
I have a friend who is recently (few months) single from a serious relationship. Right now my goal is to more often than not, get him talking to women we meet in bars/clubs/the street - whatever. He has gotten rejected a few times, but a lot of the times he has gotten conversations and once (when I was with him) he got a number. The amount of confidence that has given him is -astronomical-. And now rejection is not nearly as terrifying for him, because we just laugh it off as we walk away, simple.
Can you say that there is anything wrong with that?
Izick, it doesn't really matter if the video is fake or not. The situation presented can still happen to anyone at any time and the way he talked would work just fine in a real life context. That's all that matters. You make it sound line that if you can debunk this one video, all pua concepts and everything confidence related fall to pieces and is thus proven to be bullshit, but that's not gonna happen 
DY please just drop the attitude. Maybe I'm misunderstanding you but in my experience both ASD and LMR are real concepts, whether you like it or not, or whether you like pua or not.
Edit: It's 7am, time to drop this subject before the thread gets locked or someone gets banned. It's bedtime!
DY please just drop the attitude. Maybe I'm misunderstanding you but in my experience both ASD and LMR are real concepts, whether you like it or not, or whether you like pua or not.
Edit: It's 7am, time to drop this subject before the thread gets locked or someone gets banned. It's bedtime!
Vermillion
Banned
Five seconds, really? That's what you're basing this off of? And no you're supposed to look at their eyes the whole time, exceptions made for certain times (like when you aren't talking).
Also, it's a free video, isn't it?
GillianSeed79
Member
I just had one of those completely random chance encounters with an old high school crush today and I'm not sure how to feel about it. This was the kind of girl you had a crush on and were friends with, but eventually lost touch with over the years after graduating. I was at a music festival and all of a sudden this girl appears before me and starts hugging me. I didn't know what to make of it at first until I saw her face and realized it was her. This is completely random and in an entirely different state from where she lives. She starts telling me about how she still lives back home and she was just thinking about me the other day.
Of course those old nervous butterflies started welling up in that part of your chest when you have a crush on someone. I tell her where I work and she says I should look her up if I'm ever near back home. She says she wants to give me her card, but doesn't have one.
So then I ask her what she's been up to as we haven't seen each other for probably 10 years. She tells me she's married, has a house with her husband and points out her two kids in the crowd. I'm happy for her and honestly hadn't thought about her in years, but it was like being nostalgia friend-zoned a decade later out of the blue.
That sounds really selfish I guess. I don't know why I'm dwelling on it. Like I said I hadn't seen her in like a decade. My heart just kind of sunk when I realized she had the perfect white pickett fence thing going for her with a loving family and I've been stuck in one-bedroom apartment singles limbo for too long.
I guess it left me with a feeling that I want to seriously think about dating again, but utterly fearful everyone has already probably passed me by and that I should stop living like a 25-year-old bachelor. I have to do a lot of work on myself, though, before I even think about trying to date again I think. It's like I love being single because I'm not emotionally attached to anyone, but when you feel those butterflies you realize what you've been missing out on for so long.
Of course those old nervous butterflies started welling up in that part of your chest when you have a crush on someone. I tell her where I work and she says I should look her up if I'm ever near back home. She says she wants to give me her card, but doesn't have one.
So then I ask her what she's been up to as we haven't seen each other for probably 10 years. She tells me she's married, has a house with her husband and points out her two kids in the crowd. I'm happy for her and honestly hadn't thought about her in years, but it was like being nostalgia friend-zoned a decade later out of the blue.
That sounds really selfish I guess. I don't know why I'm dwelling on it. Like I said I hadn't seen her in like a decade. My heart just kind of sunk when I realized she had the perfect white pickett fence thing going for her with a loving family and I've been stuck in one-bedroom apartment singles limbo for too long.
I guess it left me with a feeling that I want to seriously think about dating again, but utterly fearful everyone has already probably passed me by and that I should stop living like a 25-year-old bachelor. I have to do a lot of work on myself, though, before I even think about trying to date again I think. It's like I love being single because I'm not emotionally attached to anyone, but when you feel those butterflies you realize what you've been missing out on for so long.
I don't know how they make the money, views maybe? I'm just saying that it's set up. It doesn't matter if the video is free, it attracts those people who want to believe in this bad enough, and they subscribe, and thus give more future views and look at the website, etc.
I mean look at the title of the video. Look at the description. What did he show you? You can walk up to an attractive woman, spout nonsense, and she'll automatically be interested? "For further information on how to do this visit CLICKMYWEBSITE.com." Come on, man.
ClovingWestbrook
Banned
Two ways to do this dating thing:
1.Dont live and die for a relationship. You see someone you like and want to take out? Say hello and see where it leads. No lies. No games. No bullshit. If it doesnt work out, big deal. There are milllions of others out there.
2. Do the PUA bullshit. Treat women like a contest youre looking to win. Treat dating like a game. Use tips and tactics to be someone youre not. Ask every one and their mother out.
One way is bullshit and treats those youre looking to ask out like a piece of chopped liver while the other way isn't bullshit.
1.Dont live and die for a relationship. You see someone you like and want to take out? Say hello and see where it leads. No lies. No games. No bullshit. If it doesnt work out, big deal. There are milllions of others out there.
2. Do the PUA bullshit. Treat women like a contest youre looking to win. Treat dating like a game. Use tips and tactics to be someone youre not. Ask every one and their mother out.
One way is bullshit and treats those youre looking to ask out like a piece of chopped liver while the other way isn't bullshit.
Vermillion
Banned
I like where you're starting from. Get to working on yourself by thinking about what you want and what you like. Then, go from there.
Izick, you can get a girl by just saying things. It doesn't always work, but it works well enough to try. Just in keeping the conversation going and being interesting to them. One of these days, you'll try it, and you'll look back like "wow, what was I thinking"? ou have to give yourself a chance.
The thing I hate about these things are that people think there is some kind of answer to their problems. Some clear-cut answer to solve all the problems they've been having attracting women. Some magic words/lines that will make all the girls knee's buckle and swoon. That's never going to happen. You just have to hope that she either finds you attractive visually, or is more interested in you personality wise than she is disinterested in your looks, or vice-versa. It's luck of the draw sometimes even.
You can watch these videos of these guys walking up to women and spouting out nonsense (it seems to even be a game to that group of them; trying out different themes and seeing if it works still) to see if it works, or you can just accept that some women aren't going to be attracted no-matter what line or gimmick is thrown at them.
I always think these are funny, because I try and imagine the roles reversed. What if a less than attractive girl tried to pick up attractive dudes? Would this shit work? No. But for some reason, since girls are mystic puzzles of the mind, not people, these tricks and gimmicks help unlock their interest, and get you in! Give me a fucking break. This shit doesn't work. She either is going to be interested in you when she sees you, and then personality develops down the line for the better or worse. There is no personality in the question these people ask. It's blank, void-less responses. Waiting to pick up key nouns and items to reply with in their next sentence, to help bridge the conversation. "Okay she said she has a sister, make sure to mention her sister....Okay hurry the fuck up and finish so I can mention your sister!" There's no conversation or personality, there's a forced reply after everything she says. There's no listening, just picking up and re-spouting those key nouns as mentioned.
Take that one video for example, the one where they are replying with internet memes. If all their replies are completely negative, don't make sense, or are just creepy/weird, then the girls are either actresses/in on it, or they already decided they were interested before the dude uttered a single word.
It's a complete farce.
You can watch these videos of these guys walking up to women and spouting out nonsense (it seems to even be a game to that group of them; trying out different themes and seeing if it works still) to see if it works, or you can just accept that some women aren't going to be attracted no-matter what line or gimmick is thrown at them.
I always think these are funny, because I try and imagine the roles reversed. What if a less than attractive girl tried to pick up attractive dudes? Would this shit work? No. But for some reason, since girls are mystic puzzles of the mind, not people, these tricks and gimmicks help unlock their interest, and get you in! Give me a fucking break. This shit doesn't work. She either is going to be interested in you when she sees you, and then personality develops down the line for the better or worse. There is no personality in the question these people ask. It's blank, void-less responses. Waiting to pick up key nouns and items to reply with in their next sentence, to help bridge the conversation. "Okay she said she has a sister, make sure to mention her sister....Okay hurry the fuck up and finish so I can mention your sister!" There's no conversation or personality, there's a forced reply after everything she says. There's no listening, just picking up and re-spouting those key nouns as mentioned.
Take that one video for example, the one where they are replying with internet memes. If all their replies are completely negative, don't make sense, or are just creepy/weird, then the girls are either actresses/in on it, or they already decided they were interested before the dude uttered a single word.
It's a complete farce.
Vermillion
Banned
Trick is, both things you listed are technically PUA. In fact, one of the things they were talking about on Simple Pickup was that you ask people out that you think are attractive, any one. And it's not just because you want to get in their pants, but because they could be the girl of your dreams. I forget who said this, but someone's grandfather told them "you see a girl you like and you ask her out - because you don't know if you'll see her again."
foodtaster
Banned
the answer to all problems: work on yourself and take your own advice.
the last few pages are ridiculous:
"oh i'm ugly." stop thinking that and improve your own self image.
"oh i'm fat." work out?
"oh I can't talk to girls." when you say that I wonder why. build some confidence and start, eventually you won't care.
etc etc etc. I dunno why people act as if control is out of their hands. a person can become anything given enough motivation and effort.
the problem with these threads is that people generally know what to do, they just want anonymous people to validate their questionable behavior.
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more importantly than the above, once you understand that you don't need someone else (women or someone else) to be happy, you'll be a much better person for it. the active mindless pursuit of women is just that, mindless.
the last few pages are ridiculous:
"oh i'm ugly." stop thinking that and improve your own self image.
"oh i'm fat." work out?
"oh I can't talk to girls." when you say that I wonder why. build some confidence and start, eventually you won't care.
etc etc etc. I dunno why people act as if control is out of their hands. a person can become anything given enough motivation and effort.
the problem with these threads is that people generally know what to do, they just want anonymous people to validate their questionable behavior.
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more importantly than the above, once you understand that you don't need someone else (women or someone else) to be happy, you'll be a much better person for it. the active mindless pursuit of women is just that, mindless.
ClovingWestbrook
Banned
One is being yourself but being social. The other is using a type of handbook, a template if you will that isn't even your own.
Yeah of course there are wrong ways to do it, but these guys are just playing their odds. For every one girl that falls for their schtick there are a dozen other girls that just walk by and dismiss them.
It's their confident and outgoing nature that should be considered when looking at their videos, but their actual methods I (again) find rather obnoxious.
Sooooo negative, and you really don't understand the fundamental point of the videos - real or fake (the last one you mentioned is entirely real - they show rejections in a different reel, but ABC followed them around one day - they're totally legit).
The point isn't "use this line and win" the point is "Approach women, and even if you say the most random shit, you still have a chance". Try approaching women AND having some decent conversation material - and see what happens.
What you -should- take from that is, you can't gain anything if you don't try - so take chances and make the effort. It matters more that you are positive and confident when you talk to someone for the first time, and less what you are actually saying, and brush off rejection and try again.
The thing about things like Simple Pickup (which is the video where guys try saying random things) is that it's not some magical impossible thing that they are doing. I could go out there right now and talk to women with confidence and a smile, and I would get hundreds of more women than I would get from doing absolutely nothing.
That is message number 1, 2 and 3.
Would you say the Simple Pickup guys are using PUA?
Vermillion
Banned
Girls are actually attracted to different things than guys (in general), so your "reverse roles" thing is bullshit. In another topic, someone brought up some list (I think it was Boco?). Basically, women put humor as their most important thing, while for guys, it's looks.
Of course, there are variations, and that's the point. Because you assume women are all just going to be "you're attractive" or "you're not attractive" and that's the end of it. shan then came in the topic and noted that humor isn't necessarily a big thing, either. People are varied, and they'll like what they like. but if you keep treating women as if they're mystical creatures, and not people to connect with, you're quite unlikely to get anyone.
Vermillion
Banned
In the words of Hitch: "Rule #1 - there are no rules."
I liked that movie, actually
If that Rage Meme video goes to show anything, it's that the content of what they're saying isn't important at all. That's not decent conversation material, it's just random-ass shit.
ClovingWestbrook
Banned
Or you could go up to them ad introduce yourself like you would someone youre not trying to hae sex with and impress. Its called being social.
Vermillion
Banned
Depends - what's decent conversation?
That changes from person to person and time to time.
You are looking at this all wrong.
IF they could STILL get numbers with rage memes, imagine how many they could get approaching women like normal people? If you listen to the guys talk to the camera, you understand that this is what their fundamental message is - they get suggestions from their fans, who say "no way can you pick up a girl doing A, B or C" and then they do it and show that it is possible.
One of the more inspirational, if not controversial ones is when they tried picking up girls in wheelchairs - trying to show that even with a disability, you can do it if you have the right attitude. Be confident, give off a good vibe and what you say matters a lot less.
But you still have to make that effort, you still have to say something, and you need to give up the excuses.
You're throwing out these phrases but you're not addressing any of my points.
Do you think that the advice given - go out, be confident, don't worry about content too much and focus on being positive when you talk to women and positive when you are rejected - do you think that's bad advice? Do you think that's something that doesn't fall in line with what anyone on GAF would give for advice? Or are you so insistent on blanketing all PUA as some evil that you refuse to acknowledge sound advice?
What? Are you serious? You do understand that bit was sarcasm right?
Also the whole humor thing isn't true. You can be the funniest person on earth, but if you look like Danny Devito, then it's not going to matter. There's no most important thing. People balance the negatives and positives of everything in, and it just happens that looks are always a big factor.
Nerds with Guns
Banned
*Goes back to eating cereal*
Serious question.
What do you tell someone who is incredibly antisocial, shy, and awkward; what do you suggest to him if he wants to be successful with women?
Glorified G
Member
Not read a bullshit handbook on how to get with women.
foodtaster
Banned
you ask him why he wants women so badly? shyness by definition is a lack of comfort. only way to become comfortable is to do things that are familiar to you. i'd tell him to go join groups of people with similar interests. that leads to socialness*, getting rid of anti social behavior and awkwardness. boom.
* assuming that the groups of said people are not also awkward. otherwise that actually just makes things worse and enforces awkward behavior.
Nerds with Guns
Banned
u mad bro?
.....
bitch i look like goku?
...Interesting conversation?
I don't know. So you're saying that it doesn't matter what you look like, and their videos are showing that they can use any theme and still ""pick up"" women, no matter what the content of the conversation. So if looks and content don't matter, then what's left? Confidence? So an ugly, boring, idiot can get any woman he wants as long as he's confident, right?
Vermillion
Banned
Nope. I know people who I think are relatively unattractive (and I can tell when a guy is attractive) who've gotten laid and have gotten girlfriends. Sometimes, the personality just has to click.
Again, you've never tried - why don't you?
Nerds with Guns
Banned
And now he's no longer antisocial, but he's still not good with women. What do you advise him to do?
That would require making an effort on his part.
Someone who is confident likely isn't boring, nor an idiot. Confidence helps to improve multiple aspects of your life.
You are WAY too caught up on looks, and negativity Izick. You think you're being logical, but you actually aren't. You're dismissing some very legitimate, tried and true feedback in this thread.
Try positivity and confidence for once. Even if you don't get a girl, you'll still likely be happier for it. Trust us.
foodtaster
Banned
why do you assume that he would not encounter women during these group activities? besides, for max effectiveness this person would be improving their self image as well, which would build up confidence and amplify the results of these social activities. repeat ad infinitum
I just don't like the generality of it. "Be confident." What does that even mean?
con·fi·dence/ˈkänfidəns/
Noun:
The feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust: "we had every confidence in the staff".
The state of feeling certain about the truth of something.
So, just have trust in what? Trust in I'm attractive? Trust in that I'm good-looking? Trust in that I have a good personality? All of that? Be confident about what?
con·fi·dence/ˈkänfidəns/
Noun:
The feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust: "we had every confidence in the staff".
The state of feeling certain about the truth of something.
So, just have trust in what? Trust in I'm attractive? Trust in that I'm good-looking? Trust in that I have a good personality? All of that? Be confident about what?
No, that's going to an extreme. It matters what you look like, it matters what you say - but how much it matters is too greatly exaggerated by a lot of guys, who are far too worried about being rejected by these women. It's not about being ugly and boring and getting any woman you want - no one has said that, except for you.
Look, if what you want to do is have the courage to go and talk to a girl you think is pretty - there is a lot of sound advice to give that is entirely reasonable.
Dress nicely - don't worry about getting the best brands or the most 'in' styles. Just have a clean, non wrinkled shirt, some well fitting jeans and maybe a decent hair cut.
Don't be boring - be interesting. This is hard for some people, admittedly, but it's something you gain with practice - not by reading about really. Go out there and talk about things, talk about interesting things... but maybe just break the ice first.
Brush off rejection - if a girl let's you know that she's not interested, smile - thank her for her time and walk away and move on to the next one. If you persevere you'll find a girl who is interested in you too - and maybe, if you're lucky, a girl who is really amazing.
ClovingWestbrook
Banned
Whats the end goal for doing it? Is it to find the woman of your dreams who will complete you OR is it to get to know someone better? Is it to play a game being someone youre not only to get te woman in bed? My personality isnt being the Mystery PUA using keno wearing goggles and and lips on my neck. If i try to be anything close to that in order to get a chick then yea, its bullshit.
Vermillion
Banned
People may find it amusing. And women give out numbers easier than you think. I remember when I was drunk and saying some bullshit, and somehow I got the girl I was talking to to give me her number. I crashed and burned on the next day (learn to text, ladies and gentlemen), but I still got the number.
No, she was not drunk. It was one of those where all the guys are gone and the girls are all sober. Fuck that shit. But still!
I have NO idea what that is.
foodtaster
Banned
attractiveness is irrelevant. focus on something you are good at. if you're not good at anything, then get off the computer and choose something and get good at it. then after you're good, join groups where you would be above average at this. you would receive praise, boosting confidence (but don't be arrogant), etc.
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