Support NeoGAF

[SquiddyCracker]

Format HB#? Does HB = hot bitch?
I can tell you that I don't think anyone does this. Not in this thread anyways.

You're scaring me.

HB=Hot bitch, the number represent the attractiveness of the hot bitch.
Anything below 6 is a UG, ugly bitch, imho.

Dude didn't even #close, I would have at least k-closed it.

Spoiler

Typical example of PUA speech. I am NOT serious, god no.

 

[Coconut]

HB=Hot bitch, the number represent the attractiveness of the hot bitch.
Anything below 6 is a UG, ugly bitch, imho.

Dude didn't even number close, I would have at least k-closed it.

Keeping it classy I see.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

Keeping it classy I see.

... he wasn't being serious ...

 

[Vermillion]

HB=Hot bitch, the number represent the attractiveness of the hot bitch.
Anything below 6 is a UG, ugly bitch, imho.

Dude didn't even #close, I would have at least k-closed it.

Spoiler

Typical example of PUA speech. I am NOT serious, god no.

So, I can't not read it in the voice of a douchebag.

Spoiler

Your avatar is starting to look more like Mystery

 

[Coconut]

... he wasn't being serious ...

The I'm not serious thing was edited in.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

The I'm not serious thing was edited in.

Except it should've been obvious to you even before he edited it.

 

[SquiddyCracker]

Except it should've been obvious to you even before he edited it.

If he hadn't read the preceeding posts it's not that hard to mistake it for a genuine post.
Which is my point, people actually think like this (I bet many do in this forum) and it's just sad.

You're turning women into machines that need their buttons pressed in a specific way in order to get laid.
You don't succeed?
Machine must be broken, or you must have gotten the button combination wrong - nothing wrong with you, of course not.

 

[Coconut]

I've lurked this thread for a while, it's hard to tell.

 

[Vermillion]

I've lurked this thread for a while, it's hard to tell.

Aight, that's bullshit. No one has ever talked like that in this thread. Find me 3 such posts. Prove it's common.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

If he hadn't read the preceeding posts it's not that hard to mistake it for a genuine post.
Which is my point, people actually think like this (I bet many do in this forum) and it's just sad.

You're turning women into machines that need their buttons pressed in a specific way in order to get laid.
You don't succeed?
Machine must be broken, or you must have gotten the button combination wrong - nothing wrong with you, of course not.

Oh, many people in this thread definitely have issues and have admitted as such. Turning your argument around, it doesn't mean that PUA is legitimate nor a healthy method to attract another person just because people have had success using the methods.

 

[FallingEdge]

The I'm not serious thing was edited in.

It was clear when he was explaining the lingo as no one in this thread has ever spoken like that.

 

[Xun]

Indeed, hopefully it'll all go well! Oh and don't worry about it that much, but thanks for remembering!

Also there is definitely something about pubs/bars/clubs which turns me off approaching anyone.

I noticed a girl looking over at me tonight, and I could tell she was eyeing me up (I'm 99% sure she was), but I really didn't have the confidence to do anything.

I've really got to break that barrier.

3 Second rule mate...you have 3 seconds to make an approach once eye contact is made or a smile is given.

Best opener is to try and pick up on an accent and say it sounded unique or familiar and wanted to know where it was from. Usually gets the conversation flowing fast.

True.

I'm sure I'll crack it eventually, it's just breaking that initial barrier. It's annoying since I could even hear her speaking with her friend about me in what seemed to be a positive way, but I didn't act upon it.

Also this thread has become a complete and utter mess, what a shame.

 

[Vermillion]

Oh, many people in this thread definitely have issues and have admitted as such. Turning your argument around, it doesn't mean that PUA is legitimate nor a healthy method to attract another person just because people have had success using the methods.

My stance on this is as follows:

1) Women shouldn't let it work.
2) Guys shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

This is how it should go all the time, if either side wants more "human" treatment:

(Now I remember we've had this discussion before because I've posted this before)

 

[wwm0nkey]

Ok so two of my friends from work are trying to set me up with their friend to help her get over her ex (they broke up a few months ago I think) she is pretty awesome and we all went to go see TDKR on Friday which went well and I am having a party Saturday and she is coming over. Only problem is I think her best friend has a crush on me and those 2 are attached at the hip :/

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

Ok so two of my friends from work are trying to set me up with their friend to help her get over her ex (they broke up a few months ago I think) she is pretty awesome and we all went to go see TDKR on Friday which went well and I am having a party Saturday and she is coming over. Only problem is I think her best friend has a crush on me and those 2 are attached at the hip :/

 

[Vermillion]

Ok so two of my friends from work are trying to set me up with their friend to help her get over her ex (they broke up a few months ago I think) she is pretty awesome and we all went to go see TDKR on Friday which went well and I am having a party Saturday and she is coming over. Only problem is I think her best friend has a crush on me and those 2 are attached at the hip :/

I recall a situation where a guy ended up being caught in the middle of the girl he liked and her best friend. They were clearly unstable, and you shouldn't aspire to be that guy.

On the other hand, pick the girl that you like and go for her. If it breaks her friendship and that causes her stress in turn, it's best to break it off there, because that type of relationship is poisonous for everyone involved. Hopefully it goes well, though.

EDIT: I should clarify - legit stress, where she's becoming angry and rash or depressed. Something that is a small fight would just be a bump that hopefully goes away. But I'll trust that you can see the signs of an unhealthy relationship, so just keep away from that.

 

[vctor182]

Ok so two of my friends from work are trying to set me up with their friend to help her get over her ex (they broke up a few months ago I think) she is pretty awesome and we all went to go see TDKR on Friday which went well and I am having a party Saturday and she is coming over. Only problem is I think her best friend has a crush on me and those 2 are attached at the hip :/

And what's your stance? I mean, what do you do think of both.
Seems you kinda like the idea of helping this girl and think her best friend might be a problem.

 

[wwm0nkey]

And what's your stance? I mean, what do you do think of both.
Seems you kinda like the idea of helping this girl and think her best friend might be a problem.

Her best friend is cool and all but not really my type, really like the girl my friends set me up with though as I am not exactly and out going and energetic person but she is so she has been helping me with that a lot.

Also she is a nerdy Japanese girl and that is a HUGE plus for me lol

 

[Vermillion]

Her best friend is cool and all but not really my type, really like the girl my friends set me up with though as I am not exactly and out going and energetic person but she is so she has been helping me with that a lot.

Also she is a nerdy Japanese girl and that is a HUGE plus for me lol

Well, just make sure that if you cause a rift, it's small. That about sums it up. Go after the one you like.

 

[wwm0nkey]

Well, just make sure that if you cause a rift, it's small. That about sums it up. Go after the one you like.

Well I was going to see if I could set her bestfriend up with one of my friends and see how that works out.

 

[Vermillion]

Well I was going to see if I could set her bestfriend up with one of my friends and see how that works out.

Doesn't hurt to try if you have a match.

 

[vctor182]

Well I was going to see if I could set her bestfriend up with one of my friends and see how that works out.

That's a good idea, do you think this girl likes you too? If her best friend has a crush on you she might already told her and might not see you like a potential date unless she's attracted to you.

 

[Coconut]

Aight, that's bullshit. No one has ever talked like that in this thread. Find me 3 such posts. Prove it's common.

There are tons of people that speak well of PUA and shit like that.

 

[wwm0nkey]

That's a good idea, do you think this girl likes you too? If her best friend has a crush on you she might already told her and might not see you like a potential date unless she's attracted to you.

Well the girl stopped talking about her ex which all of her friends were surprised by so no I don't think her best friend told her.

 

[Coconut]

Well the girl stopped talking about her ex which all of her friends were surprised by so no I don't think her best friend told her.

Meh, just because someone has a crush on you doesn't mean you are obligated to do something for her.

 

[vctor182]

Well the girl stopped talking about her ex which all of her friends were surprised by so no I don't think her best friend told her.

It will be hard to make an approach to her if her best friend is in the same room so choose a wingman that helps you give you an alone time with this girl. You can use this time however you like but I think it would be best to just secure a date with her and making sure that it will be just the two of you.
If her best friend tries to be with you or tries to cut in between the two of you don't be a dick to her, act cool but make sure you don't leave the girl you like alone or out of the fun.

 

[Nerds with Guns]

Stuff

Okay what’s really starting to infuriate me are people who never in their life used pickup trying to tell me what it is. And that wasn’t aimed at you Mumei I’m talking to everybody. People are still hung up on the literal meaning of the word game and not the actions behind it. When I’m approaching a girl, I’m not thinking about “scoring” or winning a “game”. I’m just having a conversation and knowing I’m going to get her number. I do not know how I can beat this into people’s heads.

The point of my post was less about you personally and more about PUArtistry generally, though. Perhaps what you mean by "game" does not resemble what my friend has learned (and he would not shut up about Mystery, so he's definitely in the same lane as what myself and Devolution (and I think Dy) are talking about), but he is not the only one who learns these things. Suppose Minamu were not a person with moral standards and decided to "push past the token resistance"; a situation like that could easily be a recipe for rape, and in aggregate is almost a guarantee of it happening at some point. And while he might not do it, the point I was making is that PUA community presents understanding and dealing with those concepts as fundamental to being a PUArtist.

As with any other community; the actions of few do not represent the actions of all. Someone without morals placed in that situation is going to do whatever they want regardless of if they have knowledge on game.

You're arguing one extreme.

Running up to every girl you see and trying to start up a canned convo is shotgunning. You're literally looking for anyone to take you.

In the context of the conversation that was had a few pages back I actually agree with this. This is what I’m talking about teaching bad fundamentals. If you actually want to approach every cute girl you see sure go ahead do it. I actually recommend it staring off to show you how worthless rejection really is. But if you want to have success and minimize the chances of getting flakes, you’re going to have to evaluate what worked vs what didn’t and build upon that. SP ignores that.

From everything I've read, PUA's objective is exclusively the sex.

FALSE.


Everybody... EVERYBODY wants something different out of it. So much bullshit in this one sentence and I know it’s echoed by many.

Most people would be better off by far by simply not treating talking to women like its a predatory hunt and instead just focus on making friends, having their personal shit together, and being clear about what they want as those friends introduce them to others in that circle.

Same thing as day game brah.

Also, going out looking for the girl of your dreams is a recipe for disaster. Before I got to college I had the mentality of "I only need to find the right one and I'll be content with that. I don't need to be like those other guys who date 3 girls at a time... I just want ...her~" and it is not a healthy attitude at all.

No one is saying have this attitude.

I think this thread scares people like me who find it extremely hard to talk to girls. Too much over analyzing and games in this thread imo. It should be as simple as going up to a girl your interested in, saying hi, and let the rest flow. But it's not the simple. Everybody wants to play games.

Anyway. How can you tell if a girl likes you? I was on the train last week heading to work and there was this girl that kept staring at me. This NEVER really happens to me at all so it was weird.

You should have went and talked to her but OH MY GOD THAT MEANS YOU'RE PLAYING A GAME!!

Seriously, that ever happens again go and talk to her.

The thing that's irritating me right now is that up until a few pages ago, LMR and ASD hadn't even been fucking mentioned in this thread. A mod should find wherever the mention of PUA that started this happened and burn it and everything after it.

Joker, dip before you get banned dude it’s not worth it. As far as LMR and ASD, I’ve literally heard of those terms once before they got brought up a few pages back.

What should I do guys?

Stop trying so hard.

 

[zethren]

My stance on this is as follows:

1) Women shouldn't let it work.
2) Guys shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

This is how it should go all the time, if either side wants more "human" treatment:


(Now I remember we've had this discussion before because I've posted this before)

Treat human beings like human beings.

 

[Coconut]

Treat human beings like human beings.

But humans are animals.

 

[Vermillion]

There are tons of people that speak well of PUA and shit like that.

Damn your irrefutable evidence.

 

[zethren]

But humans are animals.

That's a topic for another thread. lol

But even so, we shouldn't treat our fellow humans as animals, strategizing on the best way to emotionally/psychologically manipulate another person to "pick them up".

 

[Coconut]

Damn your irrefutable evidence.

In this thread.

 

[Vermillion]

But humans are animals.

No one said they weren't. If you said treat a cat like a cat, what purpose would there be in bringing up that it's an animal?

In this thread.

Squiddy's posts were off the wall for a humorous effect. There's been nothing like it in this thread.

 

[Devolution]

My stance on this is as follows:

1) Women shouldn't let it work.
2) Guys shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

This is how it should go all the time, if either side wants more "human" treatment:


(Now I remember we've had this discussion before because I've posted this before)

Seeing as how this thread is mostly men, number 2 is just what the fuck me, mumei, Dy and Cloving have been saying.

For all that PUA shit read or watched people could spend their time actually learning how to communicate with others.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

Here is the problem. I am going to break it down for you PUA folks. The reason that many here are so against PUA and the techniques it's helped birth is due to the basic idea that by using ANY technique to speak to women shows that you don't see women as regular people. That they require more than your male buddies. They're regular people. Stop putting the pussy up on the pedestal and that IS what you are doing by having to use PUA.

 

[subversus]

I'm listening to the CBS live feed of the mass-murdering douchebag's trial, and they just said that they heard he might have just been through a break-up, which they said isn't the sole motivator, of course, but isn't atypical in such cases. Dating someone shouldn't be treated as a solution to your problems, because (as I said), it'll only make the fall that much worse.

I never said it was a solution. It's just a way to improve yourself, that is all.

 

[DY_nasty]

But you never used pua tech!

 

[SquiddyCracker]

But you never used pua tech!

How else do you disarm AMOGs?
Gotta DHV or them HBs are gonna think I'm an AFC.

Trust me, my pick-up pension is massive.

 

[Kinitari]

I think you're simply arguing something other than what kintairi was saying. Still, there are -plenty- of attractive women on this planet and talking to every single one of them as if rejection rates are higher than unemployment is just... it should never be that bad. If it is, there's probably a much bigger underlying issue.

Also, going out looking for the girl of your dreams is a recipe for disaster. Before I got to college I had the mentality of "I only need to find the right one and I'll be content with that. I don't need to be like those other guys who date 3 girls at a time... I just want ...her~" and it is not a healthy attitude at all.

No, he's saying -exactly- what I am saying. What else could I have possibly been saying?

What else was I saying? Go up to every girl who catches your eye, or at least, never think to yourself "No, I shouldn't go up and talk to her, it's too weird".

Fuck that noise in it's entirety. Go and talk to every girl you want to, if 1/15 respond well, and 1/10 of those are girls you actually like, you are doing better than the guys who don't take any initiative. And your odds will most likely be better than that.

Really and truly, you can look at the negatives and try to find the worst possible outcome of some of something like that, but honestly Dy if that's how -you- think I think you need to take a step back and evaluate your outlook on life. Why can't a guy just relax and talk to a girl he sees in a park? Why does there have to be a right place and a right time that is so ambiguous that the poster has to come running to the thread and ask if it's okay to talk to some girl?

Nobody is saying that a guy with severe depression or severe anxiety, something that should be looked at clinically, should be taking that advice - but in the same vein, would you say the put together guys in this thread who just need a little push should be ignored until we fix the dudes who need serious help?

Stop being so negative and just take what good you can from the advice I'm giving.


edit:

How about this, I stop referring to PUA as a whole, and from now on I -JUST- refer to SP? They're the only guys I even mention anyway - so now no one can conflate all that negative bullshit with the amazing advice they give.

From now on, pretend all my previous posts have replaced PUA with SP. Done. Still have beef? If so, why?

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

No, he's saying -exactly- what I am saying. What else could I have possibly been saying?

What else was I saying? Go up to every girl who catches your eye, or at least, never think to yourself "No, I shouldn't go up and talk to her, it's too weird".

Fuck that noise in it's entirety. Go and talk to every girl you want to, if 1/15 respond well, and 1/10 of those are girls you actually like, you are doing better than the guys who don't take any initiative. And your odds will most likely be better than that.

Really and truly, you can look at the negatives and try to find the worst possible outcome of some of something like that, but honestly Dy if that's how -you- think I think you need to take a step back and evaluate your outlook on life. Why can't a guy just relax and talk to a girl he sees in a park? Why does there have to be a right place and a right time that is so ambiguous that the poster has to come running to the thread and ask if it's okay to talk to some girl?

Nobody is saying that a guy with severe depression or severe anxiety, something that should be looked at clinically, should be taking that advice - but in the same vein, would you say the put together guys in this thread who just need a little push should be ignored until we fix the dudes who need serious help?

Stop being so negative and just take what good you can from the advice I'm giving.

WTF? I think I know DY pretty well and (correct me if I am wrong DY) he doesn't think that. The issue is THE MOTIVATION. WHY, NOT WHAT. If some dude sees a chick in the park and wants to say hello, DO IT. But don't say hello to accomplish something. Don't say hello using some dumbass pick up line or technique. Say hello to her just as you would say hello to a guy you met at school. And it's not being negative, it's telling people to stop treating women differently. To stop being in awe of women to a point that you feel you have to treat/speak differently to them.

 

[Devolution]

If one has to read up on techniques to talk to women, there-in lies the problem. Are we in dating-age or hookup-age? If you want to date a person you have to be able to talk to them like a person.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

If one has to read up on techniques to talk to women, there-in lies the problem. Are we in dating-age or hookup-age? If you want to date a person you have to be able to talk to them like a person.

BING BONGO.

Dev broke it down.

 

[Nerds with Guns]

Stop putting the pussy up on the pedestal and that IS what you are doing by having to use PUA.

So wrong on so many levels.

Seeing as how this thread is mostly men, number 2 is just what the fuck me, mumei, Dy and Cloving have been saying.

For all that PUA shit read or watched people could spend their time actually learning how to communicate with others.

Shouldn’t do what? Go and approach a girl?

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

So wrong on so many levels.



Shouldn’t do what? Go and approach a girl?

Wrong on so many levels? I assume you use PUA when you say hello to a male?

 

[Kinitari]

WTF? I think I know DY pretty well and (correct me if I am wrong DY) he doesn't think that. The issue is THE MOTIVATION. WHY, NOT WHAT. If some dude sees a chick in the park and wants to say hello, DO IT. But don't say hello to accomplish something. Don't say hello using some dumbass pick up line or technique. Say hello to her just as you would say hello to a guy you met at school. And it's not being negative, it's telling people to stop treating women differently. To stop being in awe of women to a point that you feel you have to treat/speak differently to them.

Who is saying that? Name one person in this thread who is saying "Go up to a girl for the sole intention of tricking them into sex" Absolutely no one. My advice has been so simple, so elegant, so straight forward and so -in line- with what everyone else here suggests. But because I got it from the SP guys, all of a sudden it's not kosher? It's absolutely ridiculous, and speaks of people not willing to compromise on the off chance that their perception of an ideology is actually not 100% accurate.

Go through all my posts if you'd like and find one nugget of advice I've given that sounds bad to you, I dare you.

If one has to read up on techniques to talk to women, there-in lies the problem. Are we in dating-age or hookup-age? If you want to date a person you have to be able to talk to them like a person.

No, it doesn't. If the technique is "be calm, smile and don't be afraid of failing" - what's wrong with that? Again, point to -one- piece of advice I have given that bothers you, just one.

And to top it off, a good chunk of this thread is just about having sex with women. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that as long as you make your intentions clear, would you disagree?

 

[Nerds with Guns]

Wrong on so many levels? I assume you use PUA when you say hello to a male?

Pickup is approaching a girl that you wouldn't have normally because of whatever reason you have in your head. You understand that right?


Edit: also this

If the technique is "be calm, smile and don't be afraid of failing" - what's wrong with that?

 

[Devolution]

In this case PUA is just reinforcing the idea that you need to speak in some special code at women and not really addressing the communication issues of people. That's the problem. So they use it, get a number, what do they do weeks from now when they still can't communicate worth a shit?

Pickup is approaching a girl that you wouldn't have normally because of whatever reason you have in your head. You understand that right?

I'd rather we address those reasons than tell people parlor tricks.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

Who is saying that? Name one person in this thread who is saying "Go up to a girl for the sole intention of tricking them into sex" Absolutely no one. My advice has been so simple, so elegant, so straight forward and so -in line- with what everyone else here suggests. But because I got it from the SP guys, all of a sudden it's not kosher? It's absolutely ridiculous, and speaks of people not willing to compromise on the off chance that their perception of an ideology is actually not 100% accurate.

Go through all my posts if you'd like and find one nugget of advice I've given that sounds bad to you, I dare you.

WHY do you need a technique AT ALL to speak to another human being? When you see a strange dude that you make eye contact with at the super market, job, on the street, do you have to use a technique to say hello? Or do you just say 'hello'? If you need a technique to say hello to a strange male, then you have bigger problems to fix and to worry about then dating. If you can say hello to a strange male without having to use any type of technique besides simply being social, then there isn't any need to use a technique when speaking to a woman.

Pickup is approaching a girl that you wouldn't have normally because of whatever reason you have in your head. You understand that right?


Edit: also this

So... you're looking to 'pick up' a girl, not date her. Ok, so that is a different thread then. This is about DATING. And dating requires communication, being social, not putting a woman on this high plane that requires you to speak a different language than you do to men.

 

[Nerds with Guns]

In this case PUA is just reinforcing the idea that you need to speak in some special code at women and not really addressing the communication issues of people. That's the problem. So they use it, get a number, what do they do weeks from now when they still can't communicate worth a shit?

.....

No one is saying that.

I'd rather we address those reasons than tell people parlor tricks.

Who is saying use tricks?!

Please find me one post where someone is telling another person to trick a girl into having sex with them.

 

[DY_nasty]

WTF? I think I know DY pretty well and (correct me if I am wrong DY) he doesn't think that. The issue is THE MOTIVATION. WHY, NOT WHAT. If some dude sees a chick in the park and wants to say hello, DO IT. But don't say hello to accomplish something. Don't say hello using some dumbass pick up line or technique. Say hello to her just as you would say hello to a guy you met at school. And it's not being negative, it's telling people to stop treating women differently. To stop being in awe of women to a point that you feel you have to treat/speak differently to them.

Seriously

I'm not saying don't talk to a girl. I don't even know how you got that. I just have an issue with treating it like a numbers game